Not something invincible
by Pepper Potts-Stark
Summary: "I'd rather have us as friends and invincible than in a relationship and regretting it." Tony and Pepper decided a relationship between them wouldn't work. Still neither can really let go. Tony is persistent, Pepper reluctant. NO Endgame spoilers. Rated M in future chapters. Song inspired. SLOW BURN, you've been warned. Set after IM2 and the rooftop kiss never happened.
1. Congratulations

**_Holla Peeps… Long time no see! I just finished law school (yay I did it). Bar exam was hard, studying for 2,5 years even harder, but being away for nearly five years has been the hardest. But now I'm back. _**

**_I saw Endgame twice already and I am still shook. Yet it was the only death I could accept for Tony. Still I think it's incredibly unfair he had to die and I cried like a baby when Pepper said good bye and Morgan wanted a Cheeseburger *ugly sobbing* So I needed a Fix-it Fic. _**

**_I plan on finishing the odds in our favor some day even if its just for myself. _**

**_Still, at first I'd like to start a new multi-chapter fic, which is stuck in my head for weeks now and I need to get it out of my system. And what better time to do this now, when we are all in some need for some good old pepperony? _**

**_All Chapters will be song inspired and the whole thing is AU, pretending Pepper had not gone to Hammer's presentation at the Expo and the rest of the MCU didn't happen yet. (Though I love the MCU). _**

**_This is going to be slow burn fanfiction, so: There will be fights, there will be angst, smut ahead and of course there will be fluff. Maybe. _**

**_But now enough with the Intro: Enjoy._**

**_Disclaimer: I own nothing, Disney and Marvel own everything. Rated M. And I don't have a Beta at the moment. So sorry for any mistakes. Also it has ben a while since I last wrote something in English, so I apologize in advance. _**

**_Congratulations - Rachel Platten_**

**Congratulations**

Waking up hurt.

A back feeling like ten thousand shattered pieces pricking into the muscles, the feeling of bruises on the forehead and aching all over the body. Morning light blinded the eyes when opening them. The lingering tastes of coconut and metal were still present.

Tony groaned when he turned to his side. The sun was already up, but he could tell it was still early.

"Jarvis. Time." he mumbled into his pillow.

„Good morning, Sir. It's currently 5.48 am. The weather in New York looks quite promising today, with only a 12% chance of rain and temperatures around 78° F."

At first Toy was confused as to why he was in New York. Then he remembered the night before and the cause of his pain. He had flown in record time to Queens and stopped Hammer and Vanko from killing hundreds of innocent people while blowing up a zoo - was it a zoo? no there were no animals, just plants.

He tossed the thoughts aside and rose from the bed to take a shower.

„J call Pepper and tell her I need the jet here a.s.a.p. and call Rhodes and make sure he will be at the jet in time." Pulling his shirt over his head Tony stopped in front of the bathroom mirror and looked at the new reactor in his chest. The steady blue glow was a good sign. It actually did work. An even better sign were the receding lines around it. „Oh and Jarvis, prepare my workshop for some tests when I get home."

„Sir, M-„

„Mute J." With that he was inside the shower, washing away the grease from the night before and absorbing the heat into his sore muscles.

After drying off and dressing he checked his phone. He did not have any messages and no missed calls. Not even one from Pepper, which was odd. Surely she had heard of the nights events and Jarvis should have reached her by now and let her know to send the jet.

„Did you reach Miss Potts, Jarvis?"

„There's no need to contact me for the jet, when I am already here, Tony." Tony nearly jumped at her voice.

Pepper Potts, his ex-assitant turned CEO stood in his living room. Her red hair in a tight bun, black pencil skirt with a matching blazer and a blue blouse underneath accommodated with a pair of her signature heels. She looked like her normal self, except she looked paler, exhausted and… cold? Pissed? Furious? Tony couldn't quite put his finger on how she looked, the only thing he knew for sure was that she wasn't her nice, calm and friendly self. She looked like business and two inches away from exploding.

„Pep…"He trailed off. „Wha… What are you doing here? I thought you were going to Washington."

„I was, Mr. Stark. But someone decided he needed to make an appearance at the Expo and create chaos." Her tone was calm. Awfully calm. Yet there was something utterly terrifying underneath it.

„Pepper, I had to go. I assume you saw what Vanko and Hammer nearly did. I had to stop them. I just had- „

Pepper raised her hand. „Imma stop you right there. I understand why you had to go. However, what I don't get is why it had happened altogether." Her voice now had a growling undertone. „Oh let me think." Now her voice got louder and higher. „I guess it's because one of us had to fly around in a red and gold suit and rub in everybody's face he made world peace a private matter. Because one of us challenged crazy people with his recklessness and ridiculed people with influence. Because one of us wouldn't think for two seconds before doing something and always needs to be the center of attention any and every time.

It happened because you don't think and frankly because you don't care. You endangered thousands of people last night. You and your inflated ego nearly wrecked your company and what's even worse you managed to drag Rhodey into this an nearly got him killed." She nearly screamed the last part at him.

„Do you honestly think I wanted that? Do you really think I intentionally endangered hundreds of civilians and Rhodey? Do you-„

„No Tony, of course it wasn't intentionally!" she cut him off. „That's the whole point. Nothing you do is intentionally. To do something intentionally you need to think about it, what you apparently never do!"

„Pepper, I didn't know that Hammer and Vanko worked together. How could I? How should I have prevented that?" Tony started to get angry with her. Her outburst came unexpected to him and honestly he could believe she actually accused him of risking lives on purpose.

„It's not just about last night! It's everything that happed in the last few weeks. You driving a race car, nearly getting yourself killed and also risking other peoples lives when Vanko attacked you there. Your behavior at your birthday party! You smashed your living room and bedroom and what not. Do you even know that three people were injured during you stunt with Rhodey? At this point I frankly don't care anymore whether you kill your self with your stupid behavior, but don't you dare take innocent people down with you!" The color of her face matched her hair now, but her last sentence had hit home.

„I won't apologize for something that wasn't my fault, Pepper! I had nothing to do with the attack last night, actually I prevented an even bigger catastrophe. I admit I have been reckless at my party and had too much to drink that night, but oh wait I ALREADY APOLOGIZED FOR THAT!" He screamed the last sentence at her.

Somewhere along the argument Pepper had lost her purse and her hair had come slightly undone. She too was now screaming at the top of her lungs.

„Oh you mean the one time you came into my office and stuttered around about you, you and you? The one time you brought me friggin' strawberries, the one thing I'm allergic to?" The cursing surprised even herself. She rarely cursed.

„You really think that was…"

But Tony didn't let her finish. He was genuinely upset and angered by her accusations. He tried to become a better person for himself but mostly for her. And she didn't seem to notice any of his changes. Being shot down by her prior to the press conference hurt. It hurt more than he cares to admit. So Tony tried to be better. For her. He rid the world off his weapons, tracked down potentially dangerous activities and groups and tried to make the world a better place.

And then the poisoning started and his behavior changed. At first she noticed. But apparently she didn't really care or she would have made sure to figure out what was wrong. Would have made him talk to her. To Tony her tries weren't really heartfelt.

And week after week she came at him. Threw accusations and hit a man already lying on the ground. But now she had taken it too far.

„You didn't even let me finish." Tony growled trough gritted teeth. His voice was quiet and calm, but unmistakably dangerous.

„What more was there to say? What in the world could you have possibly said to make it even remotely better?" Tears threatened to run down her face now. She was just so mad.

„You peed in your suit for christ sake. You attacked you best and only friend. You blew your home to pieces. You made a joke out of me in front of everybody! You… You…" Pepper's voice cracked and she had to gulp. She was afraid that if she spoke further she would start to sob. And she didn't want to cry in front of her boss. Because of her boss. It was one thing she swore to herself the day she came to work for him.

After taking a deep breath Pepper found her voice again and finished. „You told me you loved me, just to get me to leave you alone. After all our years together you tried to do the one thing you swore you would never do: Manipulate me into doing things. Tony believe me or not, YOU FUCKED UP! BIG TIME! Maybe you should finally grow up and take responsibility for once." The last part, she hissed trough gritted teeth.

„I am not Taking responsibility?! Why do you think I am flying around in a red and gold suit DESTROYING THE WEAPONS I ONCE BUILT? I AM TRYING…"

Pepper was laughing now. Laughing hat him and it was could, cruel and full of bitterness. "Oh come on. We both know the suit is just your ego going crazy. Just a new way to pick up other brainless bimbos who'd fangirl over you. Don't try to pretend you are a noble knight in a shining armor. Grow up, Tony." She knew she was being unfair now, but Tony just tipped her over the edge. "Every time you go out there in that suit you case everyone at Stark Industries and especially me a lot of work. Unnecessary work."

Seeing her like this hurt Tony.

He remembered the promise he gave at her one year anniversary as his PA, after she had earned his trust and established herself as a loyal and reliable PA and even something like a friend. He promised her to never try and manipulate her feelings. And that he would never make her do anything she wasn't comfortable with. Given his reputation back then those were big words coming from Tony Stark a.k.a. the biggest playboy and charmer walking the earth back in the days. And for nearly 12 years she had worked for him he kept his promise. Pepper became one of his closest friends and a loyal companion even before Afghanistan. But it was only after being captured in a cave in the dessert and seeing her in a gorgeous blue dress that he realized what or better _who_ he had in front of him for so long. So seeing her like this now and hearing her accusations really hurt him.

Yet his stubbornness got the better of him. She obviously didn't get his intentions on being Iron Man and doing good, and she sure as hell didn't get that his speech at the party and prior to the conference about the worried girlfriend had been genuine and heartfelt. To Pepper he was still the ever horny playboy.

So Tony did something he hated. But this time, to him it was inevitable if he didn't want to ruin his - at least - professional relationship and platonic friendship with Pepper all together. Her words broke something inside of him. Something suspiciously close behind the new reactor. But he was just so enraged. So Tony stopped fighting.

"You know, let me stop you right there. I'm sorry, Pepper. For being an ass. I am sorry for embarrassing you and causing you more work than you already have. I really am.

But I can't and I won't stop being Iron Man. I will try to be less of a pain in the ass and bother you less. Are you happy now? Huh? DOES THIS MAKE YOU HAPPY NOW?! YOU GOT WHAT YOU WANTED! I'M NO LONGER A BURDEN TO YOU. See you at the board meeting." And with that he was gone.

Pepper stood alone in the living room, knowing better than to follow Tony. It was clear he wanted to be alone. They had fought before, countless times. But this time was different.

This wasn't just another fight. Not a day and banter like any other. And Pepper couldn't shake the feeling that something was different now. Something had drastically changed.

**So thats the first chapter. I hope you like it. If so: leave a review. If you didn't like it: leave a review an I'll try to improve. **

**I'm not too sure, but we'll see where this journey will take us. **


	2. You don't know my heart

**Chapter 2: You don't know my heart**

**Hello Peeps! **

**Thanks for the reviews, Favs, Follows.(:  
****Here comes the second chapter. As always all mistakes are mine, as I don't have a real Beta at the moment. (if you want to Beta me, feel free to leave a comment).****Characters are not mine. **

**I'd love for you to R&R and enjoy. **

**So without further ado: Let's get started**

**Song: You don't know my heart - Rachel Platten**

* * *

**You don't know my heart**

Five days. It had been five days since their fight. And they haven't talked since. Of course they exchanged a few words at the board meeting, and as they passed each other in the hall they bid their farewells. But it wasn't same like they normally communicated. Nothing had a meaning to it.

No lingering looks, no accidental brush of hands and no banter or harmless flirting.

To Pepper it felt like it had been a lifetime ago since she spoke to Tony and now he seemed to avoid her like the plague.

She couldn't remember when she had dialed his number or when she had asked him to pick her up, but after lunch Pepper found herself sitting next to Happy on the passenger seat and driving through Malibu towards the mansion.

"Shall I wait for you?" Happy asked through the window as she stepped out and closed the door.

"No it's fine, Happy. I fear this may take a while. Thank you though, for the lift. I will call you when I'm done." With that Pepper straightened her skirt and headed for the front door. She was nervous. But to be honest she wasn't excited. It was a feeling like something bad was creeping up on her.

As Pepper entered the house she felt more than heard the mighty bass coming from the workshop.

The place was even more damaged than it had been after the Party. The large glass windows, which had been destroyed by his and Rhodey's blast and that normally overlooked the ocean were replaced with cardboard, so the room was dim. Still, Pepper could see a hole in floor, which she wasn't sure were from Tony's party.

After putting her purse down and getting rid of her jacket, Pepper headed for the still damaged stairs and walked towards the glass doors downstairs. She typed in her code and entered.

The workshop was pure chaos. Pieces of a big black tube were all over the floor, only the lower half of the fire cabin was still standing while the other half was on the floor and its contend scattered around. Apparently something had cut through the walls and steel pillars and she could see smoke coming from a mysterious looking thing on the workbench. Poor Dum-E did his best to sweep the floor with a normal broom, but it clearly didn't do any good.

However, what she didn't see was Tony.

"Jarvis, turn down the music to 5%, please. And tell me where I can find Tony, please."

"Mr. Stark is currently 12 foot to your right, trying to wrangle a vibranium piece out from underneath some crumbled bricks." The British AI responded. To Pepper it was strange, even though JARVIS wasn't human she still considered him as a… for the lack of a better word, friend. He was her connection to Tony when he flew around in his suit and would give her regular updates on is vitals, whether he was in the suit or for 48 hours in the shop. But JARVIS was more than a very modern update device. He kept Pepper company through many late work nights and sometimes took her side in arguments against Mr. "I am Iron Man" himself.

It was odd that Tony didn't respond to Pepper turning down his music, like he normally would and that worried Pepper even more.

Still she walked over to where JARVIS had said Tony was.

"Tony?" She tried to keep her voice soft and calm, but at the same time she was desperate to talk to him and hopefully set things straight between the two of them. Unconsciously she realized that her fists were clenched.

Tony briefly looked at her and turned his attention back to pulling out a giant disc from under a huge pile of bricks, not saying one word or acknowledging her presence any further.

His behavior towards her hurt her more than she'd like to admit. For the first moment in five days, the extent of their fight became clear to her. It hit her like a hurricane, when she realized what she might have lost. For a moment she feared that the emotional pain might overwhelm her, but as always Pepper managed to hide that she was in pain and how hurt she actually was.

"Tony, can we please talk about the other day?"

"Why do ya wanna talk? I think you said everything you needed to, in New York." Tony still wasn't looking at her.

"But I didn't meant it to be like this, like these past five days. I hate not talking to you." Pepper was all but pleading with him now. "I just want to speak about our fight."

"I told you I won't harass you any further. I am the asshole, you are the saint. I'll be out of your hair."

"Tony, I… I was enraged. I didn't mean to attack you personally. If you'd just let me explain…" Pepper was on the verge of desperation now. Everything about his behavior screamed rejection.

"Pepper. I don't care." And he finally looked at her. His voice cold.

"Tony, please. Why are you like this? I never said you are a bad person or an asshole. You did. And I certainly didn't want you to get out of my way.I am sorry I said that about you being Iron Man. I know you feel like you have a duty, but you shouldn't need to feel like you'd have to proof something to the world or to me…" Pepper could now feel tears starting to build and she desperately tried to keep them at bay.

"You know Pepper, it is funny that you always assume, I do everything because of you. Because it's your decision or to please you." His voice was low, but had a mocking and hurt undertone to it. "I don't go on missions to make you happy, but because it's my duty to rid the world of my weapons. I didn't want to show off for you at the Expo…"

"I know! I saw y…", but Tony didn't let her intercept.

"You know, you always assume that it's only ever about you. Has it ever occurred to you that I don't want to be around you anymore? At least not at the moment." There was pure bitterness in his tone now and it hurt Pepper like a flame.

She didn't know what to say. It felt like every time she opened her mouth she made things between them worse. Sometimes Pepper wished Tony could just dissemble her like his suit. Maybe he would be able read her emotions, confusion and worries better then. So for the moment Pepper was at a loss for words and just kept quiet. She simply didn't know what to say any more.

After a while of just standing there and looking at each other - Tony's eyes hard and cold with something underneath Pepper couldn't pin point yet and Peppers eyes glistening with tears and pleading with him to say something - the first tear fell.

It felt like a lifetime later that Pepper heard herself say "Why? Why don't you want to be around me anymore?" Her voice was very weak and barely audible.

"You just don't get it, do you?" Now his eyes were sad and cast downwards. His voice wasn't angry anymore, but sad. Pepper kept her mouth shut, not wanting to dis-encourage him.

"You hurt me. Bad."

"Listen Tony, I never meant half the things I said in New York. I was just so angry that you wrecked everything you had worked for, for so long. And after your party I was afraid you'd go back to your old ways before you came back. I am sorry if I hurt you. I didn't…" She couldn't continue. Pepper honestly didn't know what to say to him and she certainly didn't want to make it any worse.

"I'm not talking about five days ago, Pepper. I am talking about my party, Monaco, the plane flight, Venice…"He didn't want to tell her about him dying. He wasn't anymore, but he knew it would have explained everything. Yet with her already crying, he didn't want to hurt her even more. So he settled for the other truth.

Try as she might she couldn't figure out what he meant with that.

"The moments before the press conference." Tony avoided looking directly at her, now. "The night at the benefit."

And then it hit Pepper like a wall of bricks. "You think you are in love with me."

After Afghanistan Pepper would have dropped everything right then and there and probably would have flown Tony off to Vegas and eloped with him.

When Pepper first came to work for Tony she was afraid she would fall for his boyish charm and admittedly, she found him very attractive. But his old habits and ways with the ladies always prevented her from doing anything about it. So she had denied and concealed her feeling for more than 10 years, to protect herself. And finally Pepper managed to trick herself into thinking her feelings were ones you'd have for a friend.

She had managed to build herself a reputation as his PA, that didn't involve crude remarks about hand jobs and late night booty calls and now she was finally well respected as the CEO of Stark Industries.

But then Tony went missing and for the first time in over a decade Peppers carefully constructed facade began to crumble. She thought she had lost him and regretted, bitterly that she never gave in to temptation. For the first time she allowed herself to even acknowledge that she loved him.

The night she got the call that Tony had been rescued, Pepper promised herself she never ever wanted to regret _not_ doing something again. The night of the firefighters benefit she was ready to go for it, but the little voice - which sounded suspiciously like her mother - had told her to let him make a move, too. And he didn't. Pepper had been devastated, yet relieved that she - a least - didn't make a fool of herself. So she went back to burying her emotions for him and it worked.

When Iron Man came to the table it turned her whole life upside down again, constant worrying about Tony and his missions along with a lot of work.

Still, not even his not-so-serious little speech, about her being the worried superhero girlfriend had sent her back digging out her feelings for him. To her his message at the firefighter's event had been clear as day.

And she seemed to have been proven right. His odd behavior in Monaco, hiring a busty red-head Natalie or Natasha - or whatever name she decides to have today, his disastrous birthday party and the whole ordeal with Hammer and Vanko and the Expo had been enough proof to her that she had been right, he still hadn't changed that much.

Apparently she had been wrong.

Yet, instead of relieve there was mainly one thing Pepper felt: Fear.

The realization that Tony, _the_ Tony Stark, _Anthony Edward Stark_, genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, IRON MAN himself could actually be in love with her, scared her shitless.

She never expected anything like this to happen. It just wasn't supposed to happen. They weren't meant to be. Yet, here she and Tony stood, staring at each other wide eyed.

"Pepper? Pepper!" She had been quiet for a few minutes now, her eyes wide and mouth agape.

She snapped out of her trance. "What? No. You… you…y… you can't love me. Thats not right. Thats not, what's supposed to happen." A nervous laugh escaped her lips. She felt like she was about to have a panic attack.

"Pepper, breath. Calm down." Tony took her by her shoulders and tried to calm her down. "Why would it be so wrong, if I were in love with you?" Luckily he didn't sound mad, but curious and maybe a little sad.

"You are you, and… and… and I am me. And we are friends, Tony. You don't do relationships and you don't fall in love." Yep, there wasn't any air left in her lungs. Or in the room for the matter.

"But I could change that, Pep." He didn't plead with her, he just stated it like a fact.

"No." She stated hastily.

"No?"

"You can't change who you are. And you shouldn't. I… I mean you just left me standing on that roof at the Disney concert hall. You like to flirt and be able to find a random fling for one night. And Tony that's all fine. I think, in a relationship you'll just get bored. I really like you, and I really like us. As friends." It physically hurt her to say this. She could literally feel her heart breaking inside her chest. But she was certain to the core, that she and him romantically involved would never work. Just being friends was for the best.

"You know what hurt the most?" He asked her and his hands fell from her shoulders. "What hurt the most was that you didn't even considered my offer from before the conference." He took a deep breath and smiled sadly at her.

"I told you I wouldn't harass you and I'll be out of your hair. You don't feel anything? It's fine. We'll see each other…"

"Tony," Pepper felt like she needed to stop him right there. Did he really think that she felt nothing, that she didn't even value him as a friend. Like this conversation didn't kill her inside, like it didn't kill Pepper to see him swallowing his tears and sadness because of her.

But to be honest she didn't know what to do. She was so confused and overwhelmed with her own feelings, so she did what she knew best: conceal, don't feel, don't let anything show. And then go back to what you know and get back in control. "Would you really want to spoil our friendship with a hasty try at a relationship, thats just meant to break? I think… No, Tony I know: us, together, that way just wouldn't work. You are chaos and party and I, I am boring…"

"You are anything but boring, Pep."

"I just don't think we'd fit. Our lives wouldn't work together, with being together like that. Our friendship on the other hand… Our friendship is extraordinary. We compliment each other so well, because we know better than to bring feelings - romantic feelings - into the mix. You are compassionate with your projects and I keep you and your company in line. Neither of us would have time to fit a relationship in there.

Being friends, just friends is the one logical way for us to work. A relationship would make our carefully constructed card house crumble. But our friendship makes it invincible. And I'd rather have us as friends invincible, than in a relationship and regretting it later on."

Tony smiled, but couldn't chase away the sadness completely.

"You always need everything to be predictable, Miss Potts. Ok, let's get back to being friends."

Before he could stop himself he quickly, yet carefully pressed a kiss on her forehead. Pepper felt like crying. She didn't want to hurt him, but she didn't want to hurt herself, too. She really wished he could just look inside her and see her inner struggle.

"Let's go get take out. I am hungry." With that he was out of the workshop and up the stairs.

* * *

**Yay they're friends again.**

**I know I am cruel, but I warned you, it's slow burn.  
****I also hope its not too OOC.  
****I'd love to get some positive reviews and/or constructive criticism. **

**also many thanks to LalaLena96 who helped me little with the plot(: ****Love you 3000 *ugly crying***


	3. Scheissejal - I don't care

**Holla Peeps!**

**Thank you so much for your reviews, Favs and follows. I am blown away! 3 **

**I am happy about each and every review, Fav and follow I receive, so leave me a little love!**

**OK, so this is chapter three, which is basically chapter two, but Tony's PoV. **

**Its also inspired by a song, but I highly doubt any of you'd know it, because it's German -like me and sung in the nativ cologne language.**

**So let's go. **

**Song: Scheissejal - Kasalla**

Chapter 3: Scheissejal - I don't care

Do you think the sun is interested in the earth revolving around it? Or that the ocean could care any less about cities rising at its shore?

No they don't. Just like Tony didn't care about Pepper any more.

She was the only person in the world capable of hurting him so badly, that he'd given up. He'd given up chasing and fighting for her. And Tony didn't care about her any longer.

He said he would get out of her way and he meant it. Permanently.

After their fight he had gone up to his bedroom, changed and went back down to his workshop. Pepper had already left and truth to be told Tony, had been glad she did. He hadn't wanted to think about her at that moment. So he went down to tinker with something, he even surprised himself by passing the booze and heading straight for his Iron Man suit. He had changed for the better, and if she chose to not acknowledge that, it was her fault. Tony did't care any more.

The next five days were spend in silence. Tony just sat through the board meeting and the rest of the time he tried desperately to avoid Pepper. Not that seeing her caused him pain or made him yearn for her or any thing. How could it. After all he didn't care about her any more.

He didn't care about the way her would eyes lit up at the board meeting, when Mr. Handerson - prototype of a misogynistic jerk - tried to out reason her and had failed miserably. Of course Tony didn't remember how she smelled and his heart totally didn't jump every time she had passed him in the halls, where he caught a whiff of her perfume.

And now Tony didn't think about her smiling in the cafeteria while catching up with her friends, which he accidentally witnessed two days ago. And he totally didn't think about her cute dimples while she smiled, which he certainly didn't wanted to kiss. At all.

No, Anthony Edward Stark didn't think about Virginia "Pepper" Potts at all.

This chapter was closed. The fairytale was over. He couldn't care less about her.

Every morning, every evening and every night he couldn't give a flying crap about her.

121 hours after she had left his house - not that Tony had been counting them, because he certainly didn't miss her - she turned down his music, while he was trying to wrangle out a round metal plate, with a star in its center from underneath some rubble.

He heard Pepper coming over, her heels clicking against the floor and crunching with every step. Of course he ignored her.

And his slightly accelerated pulse.

"Tony?" Tony could hear that her voice was slightly trembling. He tried really hard to focus on the task at hand, saving a piece of metal and not looking at her, but he couldn't.

Although she didn't matter to him anymore, he had to make sure she was at least alright.

Her fists were tight, as was her entire frame and he felt his heart twitch slightly in pain. But at least they were done now with hurting each other. So he went back to avoiding her.

"Tony, can we please talk about the other day?" Pain was evident in her voice, but still Tony didn't turn.

"Why do ya wanna talk? I think you said everything you needed to, in New York." He gritted his teeth while he spoke, but it was because of the effort he put into his wrangling with the plate. Obviously it had nothing to do with the woman standing few feet away from him.

"But I didn't meant it to be like these past three days. I hate not talking to you." Her voice was trembling now, and something behind his arc reactor throbbed painfully. Maybe something was wrong with his new device. After all, he didn't care any more. Not about his own or any feelings and not about her, so it had to be his device.

"I told you I won't harass you any further. I am the asshole, you are the saint. I'll be out of your hair." He tried to keep his voice calm, steady and nonchalant. But even to his ears he sounded a bit agitated. He didn't know why.

"Tony, I… I was enraged. I didn't mean to attack you personally. If you'd just let me explain…"

He decided it was enough. "Pepper. I don't care." And he finally looked at her.

"Tony why are you like this? I never said you are a bad person or an asshole. You did. And I certainly didn't want you to get out of my way. I am sorry I said that about you being Iron Man. I know you feel, like you have a duty. But you shouldn't need to feel, like you'd have to proof something to the world or to me…" Her eyes were threatening to spill over any second now. He hated it when people cried, not that she did it very often, so he cast his eyes away again.

Tony honestly didn't know what to say any more. He was tried of fighting with her and tired of making up accusations. He had to get her out of his system. So he went with the truth:

"You know, you always assume that it's only ever about you. Has it ever occurred to you, that I don't want to be around you anymore? At least not at the moment."

Pepper didn't answer to that. He had expected that. And still, he couldn't stop himself from looking at her. Her hurt and confused expression pained him, but he was trying to tell him self, that it didn't affect him as much as it would have 5 days before.

Timed seemed to be non-existing in the moments they stared at each other, her silently pleading with him and obviously trying to mask her pain, him cool and calculating on the outside, but fighting himself on the inside, to make himself believe that her emotions totally didn't matter.

Pepper finally found her voice: "Why? Why don't you want to be around me anymore?"

He had started with the truth and Tony sure as hell wouldn't stop with it now. There was no other way to free himself from her and to end it here and now. All cards on the table. And some how this decision made his anger go away. But sadness took its place.

"You just don't get it don't you? You hurt me. Bad."

"Listen Tony, I never meant half the things I said in New York. I was just so angry that you wrecked everything you have worked for, for so long. And after your party I was afraid you'd go back to your old ways… Like it has been before Afghanistan. Before you came back. I am sorry if I hurt you. I didn't…"

Tony waited for her to continue, but she never did. Would he have cared for her anymore, Tony would have noticed how lost and vulnerable she looked right now. He would have notice that he certainly felt his stomach tightened painfully, that there was a pull at his heart and he honestly felt sick to his stomach. But he totally didn't. He didn't feel like he was about to puke or that the pain in his chest was nearly unbearable, at the mere sight of her and he certainly didn't notice that he was about to crumble. After all he didn't care - he totally didn't.

"I'm not talking about three days ago, Pepper. I am talking about my party, Monaco, the plane flight, Venice…" She looked so lost and honestly confused. Tony had expected that reaction, but he had to get it off his chest, not really caring if she understood.

Yet a small part of him wanted her to get it. He refused to acknowledge that.

"The moments before the press conference." Tony couldn't bear to look her in the eyes, so he looked anywhere but. "The night at the benefit."

He expected her to stay calm and unaware of what he actually meant. He might have expected her to figure out, that he was dying and thats why he behaved the way he did. However what he didn't expect:

"You think you are in love with me." The emotion that played on her face was fear. Panic and flight instinct were clearly visible in her eyes. But there was also something else underneath it. And he felt something different, something close to hope. That couldn't be it. That would have meant he still cared. And he truly didn't, did he?

When she seemed to be completely frozen and didn't say anything or even move for a few minutes, he got a bit worried.

"Pepper? Pepper!" He took her by the shoulders and shook her gently. Maybe sometimes he forgot that he wasn't supposed to care about her anymore.

She snapped out of her trance. "What? No. You… you you can't love me. Thats not right. Thats not supposed to happen." Panic was even more evident in her voice than minutes before in her features, still a spark seemed to have been ignited in her.

Somehow her realization blew all his anger away. He couldn't explain it, but he wasn't surprised by that, either. He knew Pepper had an effect on him. He just hadn't realized before, how strong this effect actually was.

"You are you, and… and… and I am me. And we are friends, Tony. You don't do relationships and you don't fall in love." She had a point there. Admittedly he had behaved like a jerk and not just the last few days.

_Hell, screw lying to yourself, Stark. You would die for her!_

"But I could change that, Pep." He wanted to reassure her. To make her see, he could be, what she was looking for. At this point Tony noticed, that he hadn't loosened his grip on her, but he also remarked the she had yet to step away.

"You can't change who you are. I mean you just left me standing on that roof at the Disney concert hall. You like to flirt and be able to find a random fling for one night. And Tony, thats all fine. I think if you're in a relationship, you'll just get bored. I really like you, and I really like us. But just as friends." That hurt. It hurt more, than he liked to admit.

"You know what hurt the most?" He asked her and his hands fell from her shoulders. "What hurt the most was that you didn't even considere my offer before the conference." Tony smiled sadly and sighed. When Pepper didn't say anything he continued. "I told you I wouldn't harass you and I'll be out of your hair. You don't feel anything it's fine. We'll see each other…" He had stated with putting all cards on the table, and he wouldn't stop with it now.

As he started to turn away, Pepper grabbed his arm and made him turn around. "Tony, would you really want to spoil our friendship with a hasty try at a relationship, thats just meant to break? I think us together that way just wouldn't work. You are chaos and party and I, I am boring…"

"You are anything but boring, Pep." His voice was awfully quiet. But he could say more without breaking down and pleading with her to just love him. Also she had a faire point. She was right. Pepper seemed to be always right. And yet he just knew she wasn't entirely honest.

"I just don't think we'd fit. Our lives wouldn't work together with being together, like that. Our friendship on the other hand… Our friendship is extraordinary. We compliment each other because we know better than to bring feelings into the mix. You are passionated with your projects and I keep you and your company in line. Both of us wouldn't have time to fit a relationship in there.

Being friends, just friends is the only logical way for us to work. A relationship would make our carefully build card house crumble. But our friendship makes it invincible. And I'd rather have us as friends and invincible than in a relationship and regretting it."

Tony smiled, but couldn't chase away the sadness completely. Yes she was right, she was always right.

"You always need everything to be predictable, Miss Potts. Ok, let's get back to being friends."

Before he could stop himself he quickly, yet carefully pressed a kiss to her forehead.

He let it linger, trying to make the most of the moment.

Five days ago Tony had lost his will to fight for her.

Five days ago he swore himself to not care any more, any longer. But maybe, just maybe he had just missed her more than his broken heart cared to admit.

And today he saw it. Today, there was something in her eyes, after she figured out what he was trying to say, something he had never seen there before and he had almost missed it: She was battling him and more importantly she was battling against her own feelings. And Tony was determined to make her lose the fight.

Maybe he always had cared after all.

**So I hope to upload the next chapter by monday next week!  
till then R&R, pretty please**


	4. I'll be there for you

**Chapter 4: I'll be there for you**

**EDIT: I am Sorry, wont load it up in the correct way. I hope it'll work now. **

**Hello Peeps :)**

**Here it is the next chapter.**

**Well, Pepper and Tony compromised on being "just friends". Let's see how that one works. **

**I know there is not much going on yet, but I promise it will get more interesting soon. I just have to build up toward it. **

**The song for todays chapter is: I'll be there for you - The Remrandts **

**So buckle up for the ride and let's go. Don't forget to review.**

**Usual disclaimer: Mistakes are all mine, I don't have a beta, Characters belong to marvel. I am still heartbroken about endgame.**

* * *

**Chapter 4: I'll be there for you**

"… and yeah, so we decided to just be friends." Rhodey had called Tony half an hour ago now. At first he had just wanted to check up on him after New York and wanted to know whether Tony was back to his new-old self.

Tony had just spilled everything to him, about the new ark, Pepper, their fight and the status quo. He even apologized to Rhodey for the way he had been treating him and explained how he had been dying.

Needless to say, Rhodey had been shocked, but understanding in the end.

But now Tony's relationship - or lack of it - was the more pressing matter.

"How are you doing? I mean, it's the first time you got dumped." Rhodey was concerned, he really felt sorry, yet there was a lightness in his voice and a little laughter.

"I guess… I think I am going to try… Why are you so happy?" He wasn't really angry at Rhodey, but his laughter ticked him off just a tad bit.

Now Rhodey was fully laughing. "It's just so funny, you are the biggest playboy of all time and when you finally fall in love with like the one woman, who's practically perfect for you, who's like the epitome of class," he was giggling by know, "and who's been in love with you for freakin' years, while you had been to busy banging countless women to even so much as acknowledge her presence…" Rhodey's sides hurt badly now, "and now, now you got dumped by her."

"I know I haven't been exactly a gentleman. And an ass towards Pepper sometimes. But I don't get how that's funny?"

"It's funny, because you, Tony Stark got dumped. And now you really think you can pretend being just friends with the woman you are clearly madly in love with. Whom you have been in love with for quite some time."

"Yes. And I am not "madly in love" with Pepper, nor have I been for some time. I was… fond of her. But not in love." Laughter from the other side of the phone interrupted Tony. His jaw tight and set, he tried to stay calm as he continued. They just recently became friends again, and even though he'd never admit it to Rhodey, he had missed him and didn't want to risk their friendship for some stupid teasing. "And I am certain we are and continue to be just friends. Really good and close friends."

"Ok Iron Man. What ever you say." Rhodey had finally calmed himself down. He too, didn't want to risk their new found peace.

"Listen there is something else I wanted to ask you. Like you should know, it's my birthday next week."

Tony gulped, he had totally forgotten about that. Probably Pepper would have reminded him eventually, though.

"And I wanted to invite you and Happy. I am hosting a house-party. Friday 08:00 pm. I'll send Jarvis a reminder."

"What about Pepper?" Tony asked wary.

"I thought it wouldn't be a good idea to put you two in a room together… since your fight and complicated relationship at the moment. But I'll ask her, too if it's alright with you?"

"It's ok platypus. I'll tell her. Invite her along. We are friends after all." Something in his voice wasn't quite normal. He sounded like he had a plan. That worried Rhodey immensely.

"Tony, do you really think it's a good idea?" Rhodey asked carefully. He wasn't sure, whether Pepper and Tony and booze wouldn't make an explosive mix.

"Sure! It'll be fun." Tony said with a grin. And with that he hung up.

* * *

It was Monday, roughly two weeks after Tony and Pepper had decided to be just friends.

Pepper and her friend had decided to go out and have a little girl time.

Lisa Ane Floris and Pepper had been friends, since they had shared a dorm-room in college. She was fair skinned, with dark hair that had been kissed by the Californian sun and beautiful, almond shaped, hazel eyes.

They tried hard to see each other at least once a month, to catch up on each others life and Pepper was the godmother of her older child.

Still, the last year the had hardly seen each other. When Tony had been missing Pepper had barely left the house - Tonys' house to be clear - and after his return she had been too busy with his new alter ego and her new position at Stark's. So she and Lisa had just talked over the phone a few times.

After graduation she and Pepper had moved together from New York to California. While Pepper had been job hunting, Lisa had been preparing for her California bar-exam. During one of her many interviews Pepper had met her future boyfriend and nearly fiancé Brandon McFloyd.

But that had been 15 years ago. Soon after, Pepper had started working for Stark Industries and Lisa had begun working in a very successful law company in downtown LA.

3 Years later Lisa and Pepper had moved into separate apartments with their respective boyfriends. While Lisa had stayed in LA, Pepper had moved with Brandon to Malibu, to be closer to her work in accounting at Stark Industries.

Today Lisa was happily married with two kids and a very charming husband, who was also a lawyer at her firm, while Pepper's love life was practically non-existing… or more accurately: dead.

"Spill, how are things going down there at Stark Industries." Lisa asked her, while swirling her Bordeaux around in her glass.

"Well, you know it's actually less stressful now that I am actually CEO and my main focus is on the company and not on managing Tony's life _and _the company at the same time." Pepper laughed lightly.

"You know, now that you are talking about it: How come I had to read it in the news papers you are CEO now and not hearing it from you personally?" She was mock-hurt, putting her hand on her chest and looking shocked at Pepper.

"I am sorry Lish… I wanted to call you, but between the Monaco debacle and the disastrous birthday party of the most egocentric man ever and what happened in New York, I just forgot. I am sorry." Pepper really was sorry, but it just had been a lot on her plate lately. The last year had been a lot. Tony missing for three month, Iron Man, her nearly getting killed by her old boss going nuts, Tony behaving odd and making her CEO and everything that happened since was just a tad bit much.

Lisa smiled sympathetically at Pepper and squeezed her hand for a second. "It's fine, I totally understand. I was just mocking you. But tell me, how does it feel, being the boss of Iron Man? And how's your love-life doing?"

"Well technically I am not his boss now, because I am CEO and he is CFO and head of R&D so we are equal."

"But is he in time for his meetings? How do you make sure about that?"

"I don't," she stated bluntly. "He has a new assistant. Or had? I don't know at the moment to be honest. It's complicated." Absentmindedly, while talking Pepper had totally destroyed the piece of bread she had been nibbling on.

"Pep? Are you ok?" Lisa asked worriedly. " What about this new assistant?"

Taking a deep breath Pepper tried to keep cool and begun talking: "Well, he hired a new one, by himself without asking me. Turns out she's a super assassin or spy or something like this, wears super tight leather cat-suits and likes to flirt. And she has read hair." With the last part Pepper threw her last piece of bread on her plate and took a large gulp from her Blanc de Noir.

A large grin began to spread over Lisa's face. "You are jealous."

"I am not!" Pepper protested. "I'm just mad he hired someone this inappropriate."

"Mhmm, sure, Pep. If you say it enough times, you might actually start believing it." Pepper shot her one of her death glares, but a small smile was tugging at her lips. "Ok, let's change the subject. How about your love-life."

"There is nothing to tell." Pepper was very quick with her answer, a little too quick and unfortunately Lisa had caught it.

"So there is something to tell." Lisa grinned knowingly.

"No there really isn't." She tried to suppress it, but she felt herself turning red.

"Pep, you're turning red. C'mon you always tell me everything." She looked at Pepper reassuringly with big brown eyes and smiled.

Pepper downed her wine and started talking about each an every feeling she had ever had - or hid - from Tony and herself.

"And now you are just friends?!" Pepper had talked for about 20 min and told her everything from the moment Tony had gone missing to the point of them screaming at each other. But when Pepper told Lisa about her and Tonys agreement she had just stared at her disbelievingly. "Pepper, are you kidding me? You discover you have feelings…"

"No, I thought I might have feelings -"

"Let me get this straight: You thought you _might_ have feelings for your boss, he asks you to be your girlfriend, you say nothing, he declares his love for you while he's drunk _again_, you get mad - which is understandable - he blows up New York City, you think he might actually be in love with you, he neither confirms or denies it and now you are _just_ friends?!" She actually used air quotes on the last word.

"Yesss?" Pepper sounded more questioning than sure.

"I need more wine." Lisa raised her glass to call the waiter. "Maybe it will make sense then."

* * *

Her head hurt. The last glass of wine must have been a bad one. Or the six before that last one.

When Pepper opened her eyes, the light made her head hurt even more, so she pulled the blanket over her head and groaned. She reached blindly for her water bottle and some Advil and chucked them down.

It was so bright outside. This seemed somewhat odd to Pepper, but she couldn't quite tell why it struck er as odd.

Taking a deep breath she crawled out from under her comforter and blinked, praying for the painkillers to work.

Suddenly she jumped out of bed. It was bright outside and it was Tuesday. Normally on Tuesdays and other workdays Pepper was up and out the door by dawn, either going for a run or already at work. After all the company didn't run itself.

Scrambling for her clock and phone, Pepper nearly fell out of bed. She had 5 missed calls from Tony and 3 from Happy and one from a board member. It was already quarter past 10. And she had had a board meeting at 8 am. Two hours ago.

Totally forgetting about her headache Pepper flew out of bed.

She had never been late in her entire career, except for the one time she had had mono and hadn't known it yet and had woken up mid afternoon feeling like death. Tony had gotten a blast out of it and for nearly 2 years Pepper hadn't heard the end of it, since it was also known as the kissing-illness.

She ran to the kitchen and threw some eggs in a pan. Thank god she had an induction stove. While the eggs cooked she ran into the bathroom and took a quick look in the mirror, contemplating whether she could go without taking a shower or not. Normally she'd take a shower every morning, but normally she wasn't two hours late.

Pepper decided on putting her hair in bun and foregoing the shower.

While brushing her teeth, she ran to her wardrobe and changed her underwear, as well as put on one of her business suits and a white blouse. On her way to her purse, she put her travel mug under her coffee machine and pressed the latte macciatio button, when she smelled it.

She had forgotten the eggs and they had burned. There in the pan lay two sadly burned pieces of charcoal. So much for breakfast. Pepper turned off the stove, grabbed her purse and left for her car.

As she fastened her seatbelt she realized she had forgotten her latte. But she didn't have time to go back up again and get it. She would just get a coffee at the Stark Industries cafeteria.

Well things were just going great today.

She tried calling Tony as she turned onto the highway, but her battery died as soon as she had dialed his number.

Thank god at ten in the morning on a Tuesday there wasn't any traffic any more so at least her drive over to Stark Industries went smooth. Well, until she reached her exit on the highway. It was closed due to construction.

"FUCK!" She screamed, but drove on and took the next exit which, coincidentally was the same way to get to Tony's.

Deciding to not test her luck any further, Pepper decided to just work from home that day, and by home she meant her second home: Her old office in his house.

Two miles before reaching his estate something very odd happened. There were a few droplets on the front window of her car. It rarely rained in Malibu, but of course it would happen today. Pepper didn't think much about it, because she could just drive down into Tonys garage.

Or so she thought. It happened slowly and nearly unnoticeable, but her car got ever so slightly slower. As Pepper pressed the accelerator harder, her car wouldn't go faster. It didn't take gas any more, which meant…

"No, no, no, no,…" Pepper was nearly crying now.

On her way home the day before she had noticed she needed to refill her gas and planned on doing it on her way to work in the morning. She obviously didn't. Luckily she had made it to the next passenger-bay when her car went out and the rain was still only a light drizzle. Yet it was still about a mile to Tonys' mansion.

Instead of waiting in her car without a working phone, Pepper decided to just walk the rest to his mansion and call a tow truck from there. She picked up her purse, phone and papers, locked her car and started wandering up the road, making sure to listen for any cars and walking on the left side so she could look for approaching vehicles.

45 minutes later she finally saw the front gates of Tonys' estate at the end of the road. Now it was only 10 more minutes until she would finally arrive at her destination.

But fate just wasn't on her side that day. Her left foot got caught in the gutter and the heel of her 700$ shoes snapped right off.

Now, seriously pissed off, Pepper had had enough.

She looked up into the sky, sighed and screamed at the tops of her lungs:

"Fine! Bring it on. Give me everything you've got left."

The sky answered with thunder rolling.

"Thought so," Pepper grumbled under her breath.

After taking off her shoes and shoving them in her bag she started to make her way towards the gate.

200 yards before reaching the gates the rain suddenly intensified and the sky opened up. What had been a light drizzle before, now was an open downpour. Pepper threw her bag protectively over her head and stared running, but it was no luck. As she reached the gates and put in her code she was dripping. When she finally made it through his excessive drive way and inside, puddles appeared around her in the hallway.

"JARVIS? Is Mr. Stark at home?"

"Mr. Stark is currently at the Stark Industries compound. R&D devision, Building C, 4th Floor, Room number …"

"Thanks J. Please have DUM-E retrieve my phone and laptop from my purse and test them for water damages. If they are fine, he may set them up in the living room, please. My usual work place there. Also if he could take the files into the drying room and have them dried, it would be awesome. Oh and please have someone retrieve my car. It's about one and a half miles down the road." Pepper told the AI, while taking the towel DUM-E had brought her and petting her hair dry. "I have to get out of these clothes."

"There should be some suitable clothes for you in Mr. Stark's bedroom closet in the far right, lower corner, Miss Potts. Also your phone and laptop seem not to be damaged, except for an empty battery. I'll have DUM-E prepare everything for you, Miss." She was already half way up the stairs, when the British voice spoke once again, "It's nice to have you back in the estate, Ma'am. You have been missed."

That really did touch her and she couldn't help but wonder if the AI really had missed her or if Tony had spoken with the system about her in his lonely nights down in the workshop.

"Thank you, JARVIS. I have missed it, too." And with that she was up the stairs.

Pepper quickly got rid of her wet clothes and made her way to his room.

His smell nearly knocked her off her feet. It had been about one and a half months since the last time she had been in here. It smelled like freshly washed linen, his cologne, soap, expensive whiskey and faintly like metal. It smelled like Tony and it was intoxicating.

During his time in Afghanistan she had avoided this place like hell. She had only been in his room once then, and Happy had had to carry her out. She had just broke down and had started crying and couldn't explain why. And some how she hadn't been able stop or stand any more.

But now he was in Malibu and he was alive. Shakily she made her way into his room and opened the door to his closet room.

The sight of all his business suits, dress shirts and ties made her remember the times still working as his PA. Fix him before public appearances and straightening his tie and collar. In the morning laying his clothes out for him, before - sometimes - bringing up someones dry-cleaning and getting rid of his latest bimbo. She missed this part of her live.

Well, certainly not the bimbo part, but caring for him and being with him all day.

Some how in this moment she felt a bit home sick.

After some rummaging around his closet, she finally found the items JARVIS had dubbed as "suitable". She found a pair of _her_ yoga pants, which she had been looking for for ages and had already checked off as: lost at the gym. She had also found a very, very low cut and some how at the same time very, very cropped sports top. That certainly wasn't hers.

She tried it on and looked at herself in the mirror. "No way. JARVIS! There has to be something else in this house. Anything."

"Miss Potts, you could always wear one of the edible bikinis, those are…"

"JARVIS," Pepper growled at the ceiling. "I mean something that covers my entire torso."

"I am sorry, Ma'am. It appears, besides from Mr. Stark's clothes we have nothing in this house, except for you wet clothing, that meets your requirements."

"Oh Boy." Pepper knew she couldn't stay in her wet clothing, but there was no way in hell she'd wear this top or worse: the bikini.

* * *

When Tony drove towards his front doors he saw Pepper's car in her parking space and he was surprised. She had already missed the board meeting, and didn't show up in her office all day. Well it was just half past five, but to him this day had felt like a whole month.

"Hey Buddy, Dady's home." He greeted the AI. "Where's Pep?"

"Good evening Sir, Miss Potts is currently in the living room," the AI answered delightfully.

As Tony went further into his home he saw light from the TV illuminating Pepper, who was sitting on the floor, her laptop in front of her and various wrinkled and wavy papers around her on the floor and coffee table. It had been her normal working position for this hour, while she still had been his PA.

Still, Tony's jaw fell to the floor. Never ever had she been wearing yoga pants before. Not in his presence any way. And she had never worn a baggy t-shirt either.

"Hello Pep," he said bemused. She snapped out of her work flow and turned towards him. She wasn't just wearing a baggy t-shirt. She was wearing his t-shirt. HIS black sabbath t-shirt. All he could do was gape at her.

"Oh Tony." Her cheeks felt like they were on fire. "I had to borrow you shirt, because I got soaked. By the rain… You know… I some how slept in, and my phone died so I couldn't call and then, on my way here my car broke and my heel, too and then the sky opened up and I…"

Tony didn't let her finish. She was so sweet when she rambled and even more now standing in his living room in yoga pants and his shirt on and with bare feet. He had to restrain himself so har from jumping her and kissing her senseless, he had to say something, to keep his mind occupied.

"It's okay, Potts. No big deal." Some lower body parts of him revolted, as he said that. It was a big deal, but he had just gotten back on her good side.

"I get it, you had a hard day. So what do you say? Let's call it a night and open a bottle?"

Pepper laughed at that. "You know, a bottle is what started this awful day." He looked at her questioningly. "I met a friend of mine yesterday evening," she explained.

That definitely stirred another feeling inside of him. Was it jealousy? "Do I know this friend?" Tony tried to sound casually, but failed.

"It's Lisa. My college roommate. And yes, you know her, briefly. You kinda crashed her wedding with your infamous "Butt-Cake" act. Don't worry she's not mad at you. At least not any more. Thanks to you she hit all tabloids with her wedding. And it certainly had helped, that you gifted her a honeymoon to a private island for three weeks."

"I see. How about we each get a coke and you tell me everything about your horrible day," he offered and Pepper happily accepted.

"I also wanted to ask you whether you'd like to accompany me to Rhodey's birthday party on Friday."

"Tony, we talked about this…"

"Pep," He interrupted her. "I'm not asking you out on a date. I am asking if you'd like to join a mutual friends birthday party. Happy's going, too. We could car pool." He shrugged and went for the kitchen.

Some how her day had turned for the better. Their light conversation and bantering felt like coming home.

No one new her like he did. And there were even fewer people who understood her world like he did. Her work addiction and late hours and passion for her job. He knew what it was like to be in her shoes. And most importantly her always made her smile and would always at least try to brighten her day.

Even her worst days with him were better than her best days without him. She was best when she was with him and she knew he would always be there for her.

Like her true best friend.

She followed him into the kitchen.

"Ok. I'll come with you." She took the coke from his hands, uncapped it and clinked his bottle with hers.

* * *

**If you liked it leave a review, pretty please (:**

**I hope to see you next week. **

**Special thanks to LalaLena96 for helping me staying in character 3**


	5. Sit still Look pretty

**Chapter 5 - Sit still/Look Pretty**

**Hey yo Peeps!**

**Here's the next chapter. Thank you for all your precious reviews. Sorry to mrsstark83 I am not able to grant your wish. Yet.**

**Disclaimer: I know Pepper actually grew up in New Haven, but for a future chapter I need her to have been risen in Texas. **

**So enjoy and happy reading. **

**Let's go!**

**Song: Sit still/ Look pretty - Pitch Perfect cover version**

* * *

**Sit still/ Look pretty**

"So Pepper, tell me about your past. I realized I don't know the first thing about you."

It was three in the morning and Pepper wasn't drinking Coke anymore. She had moved on to one of his expensive white wines. Three quarters of the bottle were gone by now and time really had flown. They were sitting on his plushy white carpet across from each other in his living room, the lights were dimmed to a nice golden glow and music was softly playing from the ceiling speakers.

"What? No. You know a lot about me, Stark." She smiled and took a sip from her glass.

"Yeah, I know where you live now, how you like your coffee, that you work like crazy and that you can shred a man to pieces with just one look. The only really personal thing I know about you is that you'd die for some 4 inch killer heels, that cost several thousand dollars. Besides of that I have absolutely no idea about your personal life." Tony took a sip from his beer and looked at her expectantly.

"Tony, I worked for you for the last 12 years. You should know best, I basically don't have a personal life. And now, that I have to run your company and with you flying around the world in a full metal suit…"

"Titanium alloy." He interjected.

"Semantics.", Pepper smiled warmly at him, winked and took another sip from her glass. Tony said nothing, waiting for her to continue. "But now I have even less time. So there really is nothing more to tell." She said and looked at the night sky, wondering when it had gotten so late, yet not really willing to leave. Some how she felt warm and contend, here in his house on the carped at three in the morning, talking about everything and nothing.

Tony shrugged and took another sip, emptying his bottle. Suddenly he stood and motioned for her to stand as well. "Come on Potts, stand up. I am hungry. We're turning this into a kitchen-party."

Pepper let him help her to her feet and stood as well and hurried into the kitchen after him. Tony started to rummage through the fridge, pulling various things out and putting them back in after a second. Pepper let him continue for a few moments. The man was capable of building machines and tech that was way before their time, but was not able to put together a simple meal. She shooed him away and got some bacon and eggs. "Seriously Stark. How did you feed yourself since I became CEO?"

Tony looked at her bemused and mumbled something about take-away and Happy. He stood next to her and leaned against the countertop, watching Pepper take out a bowl, cracking the eggs, seasoning and whipping them.

After a few moments of silence, just the clinks the fork made against the bowl audible he spoke: "You know, you're right, you hadn't had a personal life since you came to work for me. But what was your life like, before you came to Stark Industries?" He followed her to the stove where Pepper started with putting bacon into the pan.

"Why are you suddenly so interested in my personal life?" Pepper asked, raising an eyebrow, while her eyes stayed on the bacon.

"I don't know. I thought, since we decided to be friends… I guess, I want to at least do that right. And you know everything about me. I figured it shouldn't be a one way street."

Maybe it was because his words were so sincere, maybe it were the four glasses of expensive white whine or maybe it was just nice, that he actually showed some interest in her, but some how she wanted to tell him about her past.

"Ok Tony, I'm game. What do you wanna to know?" With that she grabbed the eggs and poured them into the pan.

"Tell me about the place, where you grew up." He looked like an eager puppy now.

"I was born in New Haven, but my family moved to San Antonio when I was three. So basically I grew up in Texas." Her tone was light and a small smile brightened her features.

"And you and your parents, are you close?" Those weren't the questions Tony was dying to ask, but he had to test the waters before he continued. Then he thought of something Pepper had mentioned a few years ago. "You also have a brother, don't you?"

Before answering Pepper stirred the eggs once more and told Tony to go grab two plates and two forks. After she distributed both foods onto the plates she handed him one and hopped onto the counter, while munching on her eggs. "Me and my parents were very close, but they are both deceased."

"Oh my condolences." Tony said and wished he had known. He was still deeply hurt by his parents death and it was a delicate topic for him. Now he felt uncomfortable that he had asked Pepper about it, so he looked away.

"It's alright, Tony." That made him look back up at her and she smiled warmly at him. Hesitantly he returned her smile, but still looked a little uncomfortable. "I got to say goodbye to both of them. My dad was a police officer and died in the aftermath of a robbery. He was shot by one of them. Mom and I arrived at the hospital and we got to say good bye and let him go. He died in peace, knowing he did the right thing. I was 21 when it happened. It was one of the reasons I moved to California." She shrugged at the memory, but still she didn't look too sad. After she forked another bite of bacon, she continued:

"My mother died 5 years later. She had severe liver cancer, and in the end it was just cruel to watch her suffer. It's very hard to say that, and I feel guilty for thinking this way, but it was a relief when it was over. She was in so much pain. She couldn't talk or even recognize me. It was agonizing and I was so… so grateful when her suffering came to an end." Tears were glistening in her eyes now, but she still smiled and remained her overall positive self. "So now it's only me and my brother. He's five years younger than me and we chat every other week on the phone. He's a Professor at Dartmouth for history and social studies."

They ate in comfortable silence for some time, till they had finished every last bit of their late night meal. Pepper was still sitting on the countertop and Tony stood across from her leaning against the cabinets, just watching her.

"You said your fathers death was one of the reasons you came to California. What else was there?" Tony asked and looked at her intently.

"After I started college in New York and moved there, my dad got a promotion, but also a relocation to New York, too. So my mum stayed in Texas with my brother so he could finish school. My dad moved to the New York State area, but went home every other month or my mum and brother would come visit during vacation. After he died I couldn't stay in New York. Too much memories. But I couldn't go back to Texas either. Job hunting there is even worse than it is here. So Lisa and I decided to try our luck in California. It was only after I started working for your company that I moved to Malibu."

"I see. I have fo thank the bad Texan economy then, that you ended up with me." She laughed at that and nodded her head. It was infatuating. "Ok, how about your love life?" Tony wiggled his eyebrows at her and Pepper laughed again.

"Well, I had a boyfriend in high school - obviously, but it wasn't serious and he broke us up after I graduated summa cum laude and he didn't got a scholarship for basketball. I was heartbroken for two weeks, until I first laid eyes on Times Square. New York tends to heal all wounds." Tony laughed at that and Pepper grinned but shrugged it off.

"I will not talk about my college times, so don't ask!" She said and held up her index finger, as he opened his mouth. Tony shut it again looking like he bit into a lemon. He figured that she might have been a wild thing and desperately wanted to know more.

"How about that bloke you had when you started as my PA? How and why did that end?"

"You know you tend to be very demanding of your PA's time, don't you?" Pepper asked and emptied her glass.

"I can only imagine, honey." He didn't know why the pet name slipped out, but it felt natural and she didn't seem to notice or mind - he hoped the latter. Pepper heard him calling her "Honey" and noticed her puls increasing slightly. She didn't know how to react or what to say, so she decided to ignore it and pretend she didn't notice. She had had too much to drink anyways, so she felt saver not giving in to any innuendos or acknowledging his antics.

"But I didn't mean the reason for your break up. I want the whole, full blown romance novel, about Virginia Potts and …" He looked quizzical at her and waited for her to fill in his blank.

"Brandon McFloyd." Pepper filled in.

"Seriously? McFloyd?! Sounds like a real bloke." He looked like someone threw an old sock at him. "But I want to know, Pep."

"If you really want to know, I need more wine." Pepper laughed and held up her empty glass. "Otherwise I might lose it."

"On it, Miss Potts." And with that Tony was out of the kitchen.

Pepper didn't know why she was so open to talking about Brandon to Tony, but she felt contend to do so and Tony seemed genuinely interested in hearing her story.

Not soon after he returned, but he didn't have wine with him.

"Why don't we go somewhere more comfortable?" He suggested as he entered the kitchen.

"Stark, we have been over this, I have no interest in sleeping with you." Peppers tone was playful and she slid off the counter, but it still hurt Tony.

"That's not what I meant, Pepper." Suddenly she stood right in front of him. Closer than she ever had, invading his personal space. She was so close he could feel the body heat radiating off her, but they weren't touching.

He smelled like his cologne and beer, and metal and just _him_. And Lord, she had missed messing and bantering with him so much. She couldn't resist teasing him a little. And she knew, she would be able to resist temptation to its full extent, never allowing herself to act on it at all. After all she had done it on a daily basis for years.

"Well Mr. Stark, how would I know?" Pepper whispered.

"You are way too precious. And you know it." His voice was barely a whisper and it took all his willpower to stay true to his words. She looked so beautiful here, at three a.m. in his kitchen and with his shirt on, slightly tipsy and bantering with him. And he could smell her. Smell her shampoo and the wine and something that was just her. But he knew, if he did something now, she was gone for ever.

Maybe she had overestimated herself. Maybe temptation did have the upper hand this time. And maybe, just maybe she did want to lose.

The look he gave her was full of longing and his words caused shivers up and down her spine. For a second she caught herself thinking - no wishing he'd just bend down and kiss her senseless, to break his promise and take her to bed and make love to her for the rest of the night.

But then a voice echoed in her head and told her to get a grip. That it just wasn't worth losing everything they already had and she pulled away.

"Then we should go." She brushed past him and went to the loveseat in the living room.

On the table stood two glasses with another bottle of her favorite white wine.

Tony followed her and sat in a save distance from her. She was avoiding his gaze and looked at her glass in her hands.

"So you got your wine, Potts. Back to your story. You and Brandon McBloke." Tony said with a tone he hoped would lighten the mood.

"Yeah right…" She was thankful hat he changed the subject. "Well, we met while I was job hunting. He was on of the interviewers at another company, which turned me down eventually, but he called me privately and asked if I wanted to go grab a coffee some times."

"Wow, what kind of douchebag calls a girl, he sneaked the number off of her application. Jeeze Pepper, that's just creepy." Tony actually looked a little shocked.

"Well, in hind side you are probably right, but I don't know whether it's better to just hit on innocent girls in a bar, Mr. I am irresistible." The little wink she gave him made Tony grin.

"Anyways, I accepted his invitation, we went on our coffee date and eventually started a serious relationship. He was charming, had a dashing smile and behaved like a perfect gentle man. His only flaw was, he was kind of old-fashioned." She sighed and Tony gave her a funny look.

"Old-fashioned? He didn't hurt you physically, did he?" His fists clenched. A guy hurting women was sickening, but someone hurting his Pepper was just unacceptable and he would hunt him down and beat the crap out of him.

"No, no. Oh god, no." Her hands went up and she tried to calm him. "No, Tony he didn't beat me or something like this. I mean he was old-fashioned when it came to relationships. Like really old-fashioned, if you get what I mean."

He did't and looked at her quizzically.

Pepper took a deep breath. "I mean like no-sex-before-marriage-old-fashioned."

Tony made a quiet ´oh' and Pepper continued.

"He had very strict parents who where raised him strictly catholic and he adopted their values. I was ok with the no-sex policy, though I have to admit it was hard to maintain, and we had to come up…"

"Ok Potts, I think I don't need to know this." It was hard enough keeping his hands to him self, her talking about being sex-deprived and her coping mechanisms didn't help that at all. Also he didn't want to imagine her with any other man except himself, so he certainly didn't want any details.

"Yeah, you're probably right. Sorry." She giggled. Tony noticed she was already trough her second glass of wine on this bottle and got considerably more tipsy every minute. "However he didn't want me to work so much, because he was the man, and he should be the one earning more money than he wife. When I told him I won't quit working, he didn't understand. He said there was no need for me to be working, he'd get me everything I wanted, expensive jewelry and clothing and he could support us just fine on his own. But I wanted to work. I enjoy working. That is something he never understood and it didn't fit his idea of what his life should be like: He was making his way up to the top in his company and he basically just needed a trophy wife. Oh and he wanted me to bear him like… three children?! He wanted the whole American dream. Complete with the whole nine to five deal, white picket fences and stuff. He once told me he wanted me to stay home and be a good wife, look pretty, cook for him and lay back.

I was naive, so I believed I could change him and accepted when he proposed to me.

But then I got the job as your PA and he wasn't ok with it. He lost it when I started earning more than him and staying with you till ten or eleven pm working. Thats when he started cheating. But he didn't have the balls to end our relationship.

Six weeks before our wedding I found him with one of their companies accountants on our couch. Thats when I finally found _my_ voice and kicked him out."

With that she finished her glass and put it down and smiled tiredly at him.

"I am sorry, Pep. You deserved… No you deserve better." He smiled at her. _You deserve so much more, but that's more than I can give you _was what he thought, but didn't say.

"Oh don't be. I wasn't even sad when I found him. I guess I had it coming. Actually it was the best that could've happened to me. Now I know what I want and that I have value, so to say." She yawned and stretched like a cat.

She was really tired but felt too comfortable to move.

"Enough of the deep talk for the night, Tony. How about we start a movie?"

"Really, Potts? You're about to fall asleep any minute now." He chuckled.

"No!" Pepper protested. "I won't, I promise."

Ten minutes later her head lay in his lap and she was fast asleep, while Tony stroke her hair.

* * *

As Pepper woke up it was already early morning. She found herself laying in her usual bedroom in Tony's mansion and two Advil, along with a small bottle of water on the nightstand.

She swallowed the pills with some of the water and went to get a shower and start her day.

If she had looked closely, she would have noticed that the second pillow must have had been occupied until a few minutes before she woke and that the other side was still warm.

But she hadn't.

* * *

**I know I am cruel. Leave a review, please (:**


	6. Shut up and dance

**Chapter 6: Shut up and Dance**

**Hey Guys! Sorry for the delay. This piece took for ever to come out of my mind and onto the screen… **

**Thank you so much for your comments and favs!**

**I don't want so say much this time: But you are in for some fun!  
****So fasten your seatbelts, start your engines and let's go.**

**Song: Shut up + Dance by Walk the Moon (I know it wasn't out yet in 2010)**

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**Shut up and Dance**

Pepper looked in the mirror and patted her make up further into her skin. Afterwards she powdered her face and fixed her mascara.

She had an hour left until she had to go and pick Tony and Happy up. Tonight she would be the designated driver, instead of Happy. It was the night of Rhodey's birthday party and staying sober and driving was something Pepper had offered the day before. She had had way to much alcohol this week already and after coming close to kissing Tony in his kitchen three nights ago, she felt it was saver when she would stay away from the booze tonight. On the other hand she thought it would be a nice change for Happy, if he cold actually celebrate and have some fun himself for once.

Turning on the lights in her small bedroom, Pepper headed for her closet. She sighed and started rummaging through the over-stuffed piece of furniture, looking for the perfect outfit.

At first she picked tight black jeans and a tank top style shirt with some lace in the front. She looked like a goth. Pepper tried swapping the shirt and picked a simple white blouse. Great she looked like an amish now.

Looking through her skirts she mainly had business options and she certainly didn't want to wear one of those. In the farthest corner of her closet she found one of the skirts from her college years. In lack of better options for the moment she decided to try it on. She had never taken off a piece of clothing this fast. College had truly been a wild phase. She might have to burn this item, if Tony ever found it she would never live it down.

Sighing she sat down on her bed and looked helplessly at her closet. She just didn't own clothing for parties. For business days yes, formal attire for galas or fundraisers, yes, plenty and she could drown in cocktail dresses. She even owned a good amount of casual everyday clothing, just not party-casual-clothing. Why would she? She never went to casual parties, like Rhodey's, she was always working.

And then she remembered it. Putting on sweat pants, she made her way to the front door and took the elevator to the lower level. She hadn't been down here in two years and she searched for her compartment. Unlocking the small storage unit, that came with her apartment she immediately saw it. The beige box withe the brown bow on top and bold letters written across: LOUIS VUITTON.

Tony had gifted it her two years ago, when they had been in Vegas.

"Potts, you need a party dress!" He had slurred and shoved the box into her hands. "We are going to the club." And then he was gone.

They never had made it to the club. 20 minutes later she had found him face down in the hallway, drooling on the carpet.

Afterwards she never had had a reason to wear it and had stored it down here along with other clothes she didn't use, but were too expensive or had a sentimental value to throw out.

The black fabric was smooth and flowed through her fingers. It ended right above her knees, had a flowing skater style skirt, swaying around her legs. But the highlight was…

"Oh no." Pepper murmured under her breath as she looked at her backside in the big mirror, which was attached to her wall. It had no back. It wasn't as low cut as the blue number she had worn to the firefighters benefit, but there definitely wasn't a back. Tony would have a fit, if she wore this dress.

Suddenly her phone ringed. Looking at the screen she saw Tony's picture smiling at her. She quickly unlocked the phone and took his call.

"Tony?"

"Potts. I just wanted to know whether you're already on your way?" He sounded cheerful.

"Not yet," she replied absentmindedly, still thinking about what to wear.

"Listen, I wanted to ask if you could come a little early? We still need to wrap the present and sign the birthday card. And I want a cheeseburger on my way there."

Pepper growled internally and answered unnerved: "Tony, I told to eat before going to Rhodey. And I asked you three times already, whether you would wrap the gift or if I should do it and you said you had it covered."

"I thought I did." He replied sheepishly. "But Dum-E screwed up wrapping it. And I told JARVIS to ring me early enough so I could grab something to eat, before showering. I forgot, he couldn't do that when I update him…"

"I'll be on my way in 10 minutes and I'll bring a cheeseburger for you." Pepper sighed in defeat and looked for some jewelry to wear along with the dress. She knew she wouldn't find anything better, so she decided to just go with it.

"But it will be cold till you are here!" Tony whined down the speaker.

"Tony, you will take what I bring you or you won't eat." She replied, while putting on her a silver necklace.

"I could just call Happy and tell him to bring me a burger." She could hear something falling in the background.

"Tony, what are you doing?"

"I tried to put on my belt while talking to you. Turns out it's hard to do with only one hand. What are you wearing, by the way?" The first part was spoked through gritted teeth.

"Why don't you just put me on speaker?" Pepper asked.

"I told you, JARVIS is down."

"You know phones do have a button for this?" Pepper chuckled slightly.

There was a silence on the other side, but Pepper could hear him fumbling around. Suddenly he returned and she could hear he was now on speaker. "I knew that. So what are you wearing?"

"Back to the topic. Tony, you will not call Happy. It's his night off. I will bring you a cheeseburger and we will pick him up on our way to Rhodey's. Do you want fries with your burger?" She was halfway to the door now and grabbed her light blue sweater on her way out.

"Fine. And yes to fries. So what are you wearing, Potts?"

"See you in a few, Tony." And with that she hung up. He would see soon enough what she was wearing. She slipped on her black signature heels with the red sole, took her purse and her keys and was out the door.

Twenty minutes later she passed the front gate and noticed JARVIS was back on. After giving Tony his food and wrapping the gift they were on their way to Happy. Somehow they were ten minutes late. It was always like this with Tony, especially when Happy wasn't driving them. She had no idea why she always failed at getting them anywhere on time, when it wasn't work related.

Happy already stood outside and waited for them.

"I am so sorry, Happy." Pepper said as he climbed inside onto the backseat.

"Here sign this." Tony shoved the card and a pencil into his hands.

"Gee thanks, Tony. Nice to see you, too." He took the items from him. "Thanks for picking me up, Pep. And thank you for driving. It's very much appreciated." He smiled warmly at her from the backseat.

With one minute to spare - thanks to surprisingly light traffic and a lot of green lights, as well as some very dark yellow ones - they arrived at Rhodey's. A few people were aleady mingling on the front porch and the music from inside was blasting through the windows.

"Tony! Happy!" Rhodey greeted them and patted them on the back. "Pepper, it's so nice to see you and I am thrilled you actually came." He gave her a warm hug and kissed her on the cheek.

"Happy Birthday, Rhodey!" She sing songed. The three of them handed Rhodey his present and left him to greet other guests.

"So drinks any one?" Tony asked at looked at Pepper and Happy expectantly.

"I'll start with beer." Happy said and turned towards Rhodey's kitchen.

"Pep?" Tony looked at her?

"Water, please." She said and followed him.

"You know you can drink." He guided her with a hand on the small her back. Pepper felt heat raising in her face and tried to ignore his hand, which was inches away from her bare back, just above the sweater material. "If we all get drunk, we'll share a cab."

"Tony first of all, I just don't want to get drunk. And second, do you know how much a cab on a Friday night will cost me? I live on the other side of the town." She smiled at him.

"Perks of having a multi-billionaire as a friend." He smiled back at her and shoved a glass in her hand. "You decide what goes in there, Potts."

"Water, Tony." She smirked and he filled her glass with water.

"You look stunning by the way, you know that?" His eyes sparkled as he said that and Pepper felt herself turning bright red. "New dress?" And she turned even more red at this.

"No. Actually it's not new. I just never wore it before." He tried to turn away, to fix himself his drink, but Pepper stopped him with a hand on his arm. "And Tony. Thank you." She squeezed his arm and smiled at him, before turning to walk into the living room.

She took two steps when suddenly the door swung open and she crashed into someone. Luckily she only had water in her glass, because his shirt was soaked.

"Oh my god, I am so sorry." The guy said.

"No, I am sorry." Pepper said, smiling sheepishly at him and started patting his shirt dry. He was round about 6.3", blonde hair handsome and Pepper could feel his well build muscles under his shirt. Somehow he looked kind of familiar.

"You could have opened your eyes." Tony snarled at the guy and looked him up and down. "Pep, are you ok?" He asked her concerned.

"Yes, Tony. I am fine." She said, not looking at him.

"Yeah, yeah I know I kinda stormed in here. Look I am sorry, if I interrupted you two. I didn't mean to intrigue." The guy looked at Tony, but made no move to move away from Pepper.

This guy unnerved Tony immensely. He came in there, nearly knocked Pepper over, spilled her drink and now let her roam all over him.

"Oh no, you didn't intrigue. I've actually been on my way out." Pepper smiled at him.

"In that case, allow me to fix you a drink." Now he was beaming at her, not taking his eyes off her. He then proceeded to take the glass from her hands and moved towards the bar.

"She isn't drinking." Tony stated matter of factly. "She's driving me home tonight."

"Yes and you said we could take a cab back home, if I wanted to drink." Pepper answered, still not looking at him and totally glowing at Arthur McMuffin, who only laughed.

"Martini?" He asked her, totally ignoring Tony.

"I'll be looking for Happy." Tony took one last look at Pepper, but she still was too busy flirting with Captain blonde locks. He was mad. On his way through the crowd, he knocked back his drink and went straight to the fridge in the back yard.

Back in the kitchen Pepper received her drink and had a pleasant conversation.

"How did you know I like Martini?" She asked and took a sip.

"Actually we know each other. We met three years ago at one of your Boss' presentations. I am one of Rhodey's colleagues. I am Alex. Captain Alexander Kenneth." Pepper took his hand and shook it.

"Virginia Potts. But everyone calls me Pepper."

Alex raised an eyebrow and looked at her with laughter in his eyes. "How did you get that nickname?"

"It's a long story." Pepper laughed and rolled her eyes. "But Tony gave it to me when I first started working at Stark's."

"He's not your boyfriend, is he?" He asked a little concerned.

"No!" Pepper didn't know why, but his suspicion made her uneasy. "We've just known each other for a long time and work very closely. We're friends." She took another sip.

"I see." He noticed this topic wasn't something Pepper wanted to talk about and the silence got a little awkward, so he changed the subject.

"Wanna head out to the patio? It's a rather warm night and Rhodey decorated the yard very nicely." He offered.

Pepper refilled her drink and followed him.

Talking with Alex was comfortable. He seems like a genuine nice guy and quite a gentleman. They talked about Stark Industries, the military, hobbies and had had heated discussion about whether Lord of the Rings or Star Wars was the better movie franchise. Two hours and a water later - she didn't want to be tipsy for the third time in a week - she saw Happy standing in the living room by himself and swaying in rhythm with the beat.

"Alex, it was so nice meeting you, but I think I should go and look for Happy and Tony. We actually came here together. Also I haven't gotten a chance to talk to James properly." She stood and smiled at him. "I guess I will see you around? You're not going home yet are you?"

"No, I am not going home. I'll head over there to the boys." He pointed further back into the yard, where a small group stood.

"Pepper!" Happy screeched as she entered through the glass doors. "We haven't danced yet!" He seemed a little tipsy, but not drunk.

"Happy. Are you good here? Where's Tony?"

"Oh, he went somewhere, but I lost him. Wanna go looking for him?" He pushed himself away from the wall and took Peppers arm, dragging her through the room.

They found Tony in the dining room, sitting around the table with two women on each arm and at least five other surrounding him. One even sat on his lap, her neckline so low, one could practically see her bellybutton. Pepper wasn't sure, but was she wearing a belt as a "skirt".

In front of Tony lay cards and poker chips. Tony let the girl in his lap kiss the chip, he held in one hand and threw it on the table.

Pepper was shocked. It was like Afghanistan had never happened. Everything was back to normal. And then it happened. Tony won and kissed the girl in his lap on the cheek, and then the one to his right. Before he could reach the one on his left he caught sight of Pepper. He saw her hurt expression and maintained eye contact as he kissed this girl on the cheek, too.

At that Pepper turned and stormed out of the room.

Happy and Rhodey found her in the downstairs bathroom, fuming.

"Stupid bastard. I KNEW IT! He didn't change one bit."

"Pep… PEPPER! What happened?!" Rhodey asked. But Happy filled him in, Pepper still too mad to say anything.

"I'll get the liquor." Rhodey said and returned two minutes later with a bottle Tequila and three shot glasses.

"I hate him. I don't want him to go back to his old ways." Pepper mumbled and lay her head on the bathtub, downing her 4th shot.

"No one does." Rhodey said for the 20th time. "Liquor is empty." He threw the bottle into the bathroom bin. "Pepper, we need to distract you. It's my birthday. I order: no sad faces anymore."

"I should go home." She said and stood, swaying slightly.

"No! WE should dance." Rhodey told her and pulled her towards the living room, where the last notes of _TikTok_ by Kei$ha were playing. They swayed to the music and Rhodey went to grab something else to drink.

The next song started and she heard the happy tunes of the e-guitar.

Rhodey returned and she took her drink from him and dragged I'm on the floor.

"… I said you're holding back, she said shut up and dance with me." They sang in unison and danced around.

"We took the floor and she saaaaaaid…" Pepper put her drink to the side and pulled Happy onto the floor with them. More and more people joined them and danced.

Suddenly she felt hands on her shoulders and she turned.

Alex stood behind her and twirled her around.

She stood in the middle between Alex, Rhodey and Happy know.

Tony had also entered the room with some of the girls and and saw Pepper dancing with the guy from the kitchen. He nearly lost his temper as he saw her taking off her cardigan.

But what she wore surprised him. Now he knew why he recognized the dress. She wore the dress he had gifted her two years ago. And it was backless.

_A backless dress and some beat up sneaks_

Pepper saw Tony looking at her and decided it was a little too warm to still be wearing a jacket. So she took it off. Not one minute later Tony had joined her circle and stood between Rhodey and Happy, seizing Alex up and silently throwing daggers at him, but dancing.

"She took my arm  
I don't know how it happened  
We took the floor and she saaaaid"

Everybody sang. Happy took Pepper into his arms and danced around with her, until Rhodey snatched her away and twirled her around, catching her again and dancing with her. She threw her head back laughing and grinned. She couldn't remember the last time she had had so much fun.

Alex tapped Rhodey on the shoulder and he stepped aside allowing Alex to now dance with Pepper. She grinned at him, stepped back and then back into his arms again, gripping his left hand and snaked her arm up his shoulder.

They turned and she was know looking in Tony's direction when she caught his eye.

_Deep in her eyes  
__I think I see the future  
__I realize this is my last chance_

And Tony realized. She wasn't only his future. She was his past and present, too. She was everything. She was the one who could break him in two with just one word.

When Alex twirled her and Tony saw his chance. Mid-twirl Tony caught Pepper's free hand and pulled her towards him when the music went down. His hands went to her waist and brushed her naked back. Pepper's arms automatically went around his neck. She was breathing hard. Slowly she looked up at him, he was staring back at her. His gaze intense and radiating. She couldn't take her eyes off of his chocolate brown ones any more, drowning in them. If it was up to her she could stay like this for ever. Tony's hands on her back, her arms around him swaying and breathing hard from the dancing, just getting lost in each others eyes.

_Oh don't you dare look back  
__Just keep your eyes on me  
__I said you're holding back  
__She said shut up and dance with me_

Suddenly she heard Tony sing, too:  
"This woman is my destiny  
She said oh oh oh…"

And then Happy pulled her out of his embrace, spun her around and they both scream-singed:

"Shut up and dance!" And began jumping and singing, like everybody else, until the end of the song.

"I need a break." Pepper panted and went to refill her drink.

"I know something to pass the break." Tony said with a glint in his eye to the group who had followed her into the kitchen. He pulled an empty bottle from behind his back.

"Spin the bottle." He smirked. "I bet Pepper's a chicken." And he placed the bottle on the table and turned to Rhodey laughing. He in turn shook his head in a warning manner at him.

Pepper yanked at his arm, grabbed the bottle from the table, shoved it in his hand and got really close to his face, her lips nearly ghosting his.

"Game on, Stark."

* * *

**Spin the bottle? How could that possibly go wrong. **

**Stay tuned for the next chapter! I hope to be able to update by Monday.  
****Leave me a review if you liked it (:**


	7. Let Me Entertain You

**Chapter 7: Let me entertain you**

**Hello everyone.  
****Thanks for the two reviews I got. At least I know some of you are still reading it :D To everyone else reading it: I also thank the invisible readers :D  
****However:  
****If you don't like this story, please let me know how to improve.  
****I try very hard to avoid mistakes, but I don't have a beta at the moment, so it's possible I don't catch everything. If you hate the plot, let me know and I'll try to improve. I am also open for plot ideas. **

**Well this is the next chapter. I sincerely hope you enjoy.**

**Song: Let me entertain you - Robbie Williams**

* * *

_Previously: "Spin the bottle." He smirked. "I bet Pepper's a chicken." And he placed the bottle on the table and turned to Rhodey, laughing. He in turn shook his head in a warning manner at him._

_Pepper yanked at his arm, grabbed the bottle from the table, shoved it in his hand and got really close to his face, her lips nearly ghosting his. _

_"__Game on, Stark."_

* * *

**Let me entertain you**

Giving him a cold look she turned and walked back into the living room, swaying her hips deliberately with every step and knowing Tony was watching her every move. He wanted to be a tease? Fine. So could she.

Not two minutes later Tony and Rhodey joined her in the living room and settled alongside her on the carpet.

"We're only three people, it's no fun with only three people." Tony complained. Spotting two of his former companions at the back door he waved them over. "Jade, Tanice! Come over here. We need more people!" The blonde and the brunette looked at each other, giggled and joined them. As they sat down their short skirts moved even higher up their thighs. _Thank god they still have their legs crossed. _Pepper thought.

She knew he did that deliberately to unnerve her. And Pepper would never admit it, but he sort of succeeded. When Pepper saw Alex and his army pals enter the room as well she called after him. "Alex, I need back up. Would you mind joining me?" He smiled warmly at her and asked what she needed help with. So Pepper held up the empty bottle and smiled apologetic at him. "Care to reminisce old college party games?"

Alex laughed and said something to one of his friends, but they both came over and joined them on the carpet.

They ended up with Rhodey, Alex, Alex's friend Jay, Jade, Tanice, Tony and Pepper willing to participate in their game. Some how someone had also managed to drag Happy and Ellis - a lovely girl he had met at the party, one of Rhodey's childhood friends - into it.

"So how do we do this?" Rhodes asked, slurring slightly.

"Fist everyone needs a full bottle or glass with a drink." Pepper said and everyone raised the complementary item to show that it's filled. "And now it's actually very basic. The one the bottle points to has to choose: Truth or dare. I guess?" She shrugged and everyone nodded in agreement. Everyone except Tony.

"Noooo. That's too easy, too basic. You are playing with me. Master of drinking and party games. I have more rules." A wicked grin appeared on Tonys face. "There also is a category where it's basically _"Never have I ever" -_"

"But how is that different from Truth?" Happy asked.

"It is. You have to drink." Tony stated banally. Happy frowned, but Tony ignored him and continued. "Also you don't get to choose the category, the one who spins the bottle has to… before he spins."

"If we're doing it this way, we need a veto." Pepper said sternly. "And no sexual innuendos."

A sharp giggle came from Tanice. The blonde bombshell with her green bikini-top, which was way too small for her proportions actually laughed at her. "I knew you were a prude. I don't mind sexual innuendos." She hushed the last part in Tony's direction and twirled her hair around one finger. Pepper wanted to vomit. Instead she rolled her eyes and cough-laughed in annoyance.

Tony grinned at the girl, but looked at Pepper and saw her angry glare. "Alright nothing overly sexual. In public at least. French kissing at most. But we include _7 minutes in heaven._ Deal?"

Pepper grabbed his outstretched hand and shook it. "Deal. I spin first."

She grabbed the bottle and thought for a moment. "The one the bottle chooses has to down their drink."

"Potts, that's lame, even for you." Tony remarked and threw his arm casually around Jade, grabbing her shoulder.

Rolling her eyes again, Pepper backed down. "Fine down their drink while doing a head stand." She spun and the neck pointed towards Rhodey.

They had trouble steadying him long enough to even bring his beer toward his mouth, so in the end Happy and Alex just lifted him by his ankles and held him over the balcony. Later when Pepper would think about this party her stomach still crunched painfully by how stupid and dangerous that had been. And she would feel even guiltier, since it had been _her_ idea to dangle him out of the first floor to fulfill _her_ dare.

When it was Rhodey's turn he grabbed a cup from the kitchen and sat it down. "I am starting a Kings Cup." He announced and spun the bottle.

"Jim that's not even part of the rules." Ellis chided him, but laughed.

"Now it is!" Jay, whom the bottle had chosen exclaimed and squirted ketchup inside.

"Truth! Did you ever had sex on the beach…" He spun and it pointed to "Jade?"

The brunette woman giggled and threw her brown hair back, her front side swaying with every move and came dangerously close to falling out of her tiny crop top. "Yes." She and Tanice giggled even more and threw glowing looks at Tony and Alex, well at basically every male in the room.

"And not only once!" Tanice screamed and they both laughed even more. Even Rhodey smiled and Tony grinned. Pepper wasn't fuming, yet, but she hated those girls. Not Tanice and Jade specifically, but her type of woman. They made classy look dull and grown woman look like prudes, because they didn't throw themselves at every male. They were exactly the type Pepper would have to accompany out of the house every other morning after they had spend the night with Tony.

_My house and my Tony. _Pepper thought. _Huh? Where did that thought come from? He is certainly not my Tony. Great now I am talking to myself, already. _

"Pepper?" Happy's voice broke her train of thought. "You have to fill the cup with something." And she did. She poured some Ginger Ale into it and mixed it with the ketchup.

"Okay let's move this along… The one the bottle points to has to kiss… Happy." The bottle pointed back at her and everyone laughed. "Sorry Happy." She laughed at him and leaned over Ellis toward him. It took various attempts. Pepper felt very awkward, since the knew each other for so long. To him she practically was bis little sister and she adored him as her loyal friend. They both laughed every time they came close to kiss each other and had to back up again, since they were laughing so hard. "Stop laughing" She giggled after her fifth attempt. "That makes it even harder."

"I hope not." Alex said, and everyone started bellowing, even Tony.

Happy lost it then and Pepper actually lay on the carpet laughing, holding her sides. "That's… That's not what I meant."

Finally Pepper got a hold of herself and kissed him square on the mouth. It was short and not at all romantic, but it wasn't entirely unpleasant either.

As Happy and Pepper kissed Tony felt something twitch behind the reactor, but he blamed it on the alcohol.

"So is it Happy's turn now?" Ellis asked and grabbed the bottle.

"Yeah sure, let him spin." Pepper shrugged.

And so they played for quite some time. The cup got filled with peanut butter, gummy worms, vodka, gravy and a few drips tabasco. Alex ended up downing it and Pepper soothed him as he emptied his stomach into the rosebushes in Rhodey's backyard. After quickly rinsing his mouth he was back with the rest and it was his turn to spin the bottle.

They learned Ellis had her nipples pierced in college, Jade could lick her elbow, Happy of all people had actually shoplifted once, but had returned it the next day out of embarrassment and Jay had a rubber duck tattooed on his left butt-cheek, but had it removed half a year ago.

Tony climbed the outside of Rhodes house and sang Old MacDonald pretending to ride his house like a horse. That had been Rhodey's idea and Pepper screamed her lungs out, trying to get them to not do it, with no success.

Happy kissed a stranger. They all did pranks to Rhodey's neighbors, by ringing their door and running away. That had been fun, until one called the cops and Ellis - who was the one that was most sober - convinced them to not charge them, but they had to promise to not do it again.

Happy and Ellis kissed several times, first because of the bottle and later on, just because they wanted to. Everybody just grinned at that, but no-one had said anything about it. Jade and Tanice kissed, too, as well as Rhodey and Tony. Their kiss had been very awkward, but fun non the less. Pepper had kissed everyone except for Ellis and Tony twice by now, but only small pecks on the lips. Jade and Rhodey seemed to be getting closer with every second passing.

Alex was a master at pickpocketing small things from other guests around the room and could do the Macarena like no other.

Jay and Alex had 7 minutes in heaven, but they came back considerably more drunk than before.

Pepper did body shots from Jade and Alex and gave them to Jay, Ellis and Jade.

She also had 7 minutes in heaven with Rhodey, but they just chatted and drank.

Now it was Peppers turn with Alex dare. She had to go skinny dipping in Rhodey's pool. Debating wether this should be her veto or not, she hesitated for a split second. In the end she was feeling adventurous and she had an idea. Shedding her clothes behind Rhodey's arbor she not-so-accidentally kicked the power plug for the garden. As the music and lights went out and everyone was booing and screaming to get the music going again, Pepper took her chance and sprinted to the pool, jumped in and back out. Before the chaos was over she was out and dressed again, just as the lights were back on she pulled down her shirt.

The boys and Tony's bombshells booed at her, but she grinned and high fived with Ellis.

"Nicely done." Ellis complimented her.

"Thank you." Pepper quipped and took the bottle.

"I really wanted to see you skinny dip." Alex said in a way, that only she could hear. But he said it jokingly and he was smiling warmly at her.

"Maybe another time." Pepper smiled back. The Tequila she had with Rhodey in the kitchen told her to kiss his cheek and so she did. His cheeks pinked a bit and he smiled at her.

Tony saw her kissing Alex's cheek and he wanted to hit him hard. How dare he goes fishing in his pond. How dare he even think about laying his dirty hands on Pepper. Admittedly he wanted to see her skinny dipping, too, and he was very surprised when Pepper didn't veto this dare. But the kiss was too much.

"So, 7 minutes in heaven for Tanice and…"

Pepper wanted to hit herself with a brick in the face. Hard. How could she have been so stupid. There was a one to nine chance that the bottle landed there. She didn't know why, but her heart sank as she saw the bottle pointing at Tony. She didn't want him to be seven minutes alone with Tanice, allowed to do everything they wanted.

But Tony didn't veto the choice. He just glared angrily at Pepper, gave Tanice a dazzling Tony Stark smile and helped her up.

He deliberately placed his hand on her ass as he accompanied her out of the room, knowing Pepper would see it. He wanted to hurt Pepper. She had moved on? He could do so, too.

The boys, except for Happy whistled after him. Tony shot them a winning grin and pumped his fist in the air. Happy however only looked over at Pepper. The way her eyes darkened and seemed to be glistening only a fraction more than usual worried him. Also her jaw had set and her breathing seemed to have intensified. She got still. Dangerously still. Happy had only seen her like this once. It had been the day after they got the news Tony had gone missing. He knew how those three month had been for her. They had taken a toll on her.

One would notice nothing on the outside. She was far too composed and professional for that. But he knew her and he knew her reaction and what the little muscle movements in her face meant. Happy had witnessed her breakdown a year ago, the only time she had shown what had been going on inside of her.

So he knew what has happened to her, the moment Tony had left the room.

He could see it in her micro reactions, it had been the same when he went missing, Tony had just shattered her into a million pieces.

When Tony returned there were unmistakably lipstick stains on his collar and neck. Tanice on the other hand looked a little ruffled, but nothing too serious.

It was Tony's turn to spin the bottle. "Potts! You look like the stocks just dropped 80 points." He laughed. "I know something to cheer you up. 7 minutes in heaven with Pepper!" He spun and the bottle pointed at himself. Happy noticed how Pepper's face dropped and how she didn't move a muscle. She didn't even breathe. Happy knew she was about to crumble, fighting the tears. "Oh for me. Lucky you Potts." Tony went to stand, apparently oblivious to Pepper's condition, but Happy interjected.

"I need a new drink anyways, Tony. If it's ok, I'll take up your seven minutes in heaven with her." Tony looked bewildered, but saw Happy's _don't fight me on this one_ expression.

"Suit yourself, Hap. Ellis, you ok with that? On the other hand I think with Miss Buttoned-Up over here you have nothing to worry about." He laughed. No-one laughed with him.

Happy noticed how Peppers eyes seemed to be a fraction from spilling over.

"Come on Pep. Let's go." Pepper took his outstretched hand and let herself get pulled to her feet.

"Thank you, Happy," she said quietly and smiled sadly at him while wiping her eyes when they reached the kitchen.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Happy asked sympathetically and rubbed her shoulders.

"Honestly? Not really. I am just tired of his behavior. The way he treats those women." She was avoiding his glance.

"I am tired of the way he is treating you, Pepper." Happy said and looked sternly at her.

"I am just his employee. It's my job. I just hoped we were over with the pointless one night stands." She sighed and took a sip from her beer.

"I think you two are more than just employer and employee, Pep." He tried smiling encouragingly at her. Somehow she just looked worse after his statement and didn't answer at first.

"I can't do this." She whispered more to herself than him.

"Pep, maybe you two should…" But before he could finish she brushed past him.

"I guess that has been seven minutes." She said and left the kitchen.

Sometimes it was frightening how good Happy could read her. Sure Jimmy was one of her best friends, but Happy was always there for her, no questions asked. But she didn't want to talk about her feelings. She hadn't figured them out herself yet, and she certainly didn't wanted to talk about it while being shit-faced drunk.

As she entered the living room again, she had a fake grin - that nearly even managed to fool herself - on her face and danced back inside. "No worries Ellis, you can have your man back now. He's waiting in the kitchen for you."

After flopping back down she handed the bottle to Jay and said: "Since Happy won't return for the moment, it's your turn to spin." She rested her head, which like the bottle was spinning heavily by now on Alex's shoulder and gave Tony a hard, long, icy look.

"Okay! Kissing Tony." Jay announced and spun. Luck just wasn't on Pepper's side that night.

Without breaking her death glare towards Tony she said it: "I veto. Wouldn't want to disappoint Tanice." The smile she gave him while saying it, was so sweet it could have come straight from Lucifer himself.

After a few more rounds Alex had to excuse himself, but didn't return. Jade and Rhodey were somewhere in one of the upper rooms, not returning from their 7 minutes in heaven.

It was was Jay's turn again, his truth was: Who are you in love with. And fate chose Pepper again.

"No one." She said quietly, but avoided all eyes.

She grabbed the bottle, ready to spin. "Dare. -"

Suddenly Tony spoke up. "Liar."

"Excuse me?" She asked, perplexed.

"You lied." Tony sated simply.

"No I didn't." Pepper was aggravated.

"Yes you did."

"Oh and who am I in love with?" She all but spat in his face, totally forgetting the others in the room.

"Me." Tony said it so nonchalant and matter of factly she couldn't say anything. She was furious. Furious about him and his damned behavior, about him playing with her, about him making a fool of her in front of everyone.

Pepper couldn't take it any longer, she stood up without saying another word, true the bottle on the floor and left the room, moving towards the closet where their coats hang.

"Pepper." Tony called after her. "Pepper wait! Where do you think you're going!" It wasn't a question. It was a command and he grabbed her by the arm. The people mingling in the hallway looked strangely and interested at them.

"I don't talk to you. And certainly not here in front of all these people." Pepper tried to yank her arm free from his grip, but he was too strong.

"Alright, then we talk in here." He said and shoved her not-so-gently into the closet behind her. Tony followed her inside and closed the door. It was a small room with a few shelves, stuffed with shoes and jackets. It barely fit two people, but he managed to close the door, now being pressed up against her. He had enough of her pretending not wanting something he was certain she did, and he was sick of pretending to not care, too. And that was gonna change now.

"You Pepper, are a liar. You clearly are in love with me. Why wouldn't you just admit it?" He had intended to sound nice and encouraging, but somehow he sounded aggressive and threatening. He blamed it on her actions with Alex.

"Tony, there is nothing to admit! I frankly, I thought we were over this. I just like you as a friend!" She all but shouted at him know.

"Oh cut the crap, Pepper!" He cut her off. He really was angry now. "We both now that has nothing to do with it. You like me and you just don't want to admit it."

"No Tony. I don't feel for you this way." _LIE!_ Her heart screamed. "I am only mad at you for getting back to your old ways." _LIE! _"But I don't want you like that." _DEFINITELY A LIE! _

He blinked at her. "Let me get this straight. You don't want me and you don't love me, but you don't want me sleeping with random girls?"

"Yes!" She said angrily. "Are you happy now?! Yes, I don't want you sleeping around."

"But why? If you are not interested in me, I can do what I want, can't I?" Unintentionally he was stepping closer to her.

"No. I mean yes you can, but I care for you. Just not in a… like a… like this."

He laughed bitterly at that. "_This_? You can't even say the word." He was mocking her now. "Then tell me Pepper, if you are really not interested in me, why did you look like a hurt puppy when I went away with Tanice?" _Crap so he did notice. And he did it anyway?_ That hurt more than she cared to adit at the moment. "Why were you fuming when you came into the room where I was playing Strip-poker? Why did you look like you wanted to strangle the girls all evening? And why didn't you want to kiss me? You kissed everyone else! Even the girls!"

"It would be inapprop-"

"I said stop the bullshit." He hissed through gritted teeth. "Kissing a girl in front of your boss is inappropriate, too." He spat the words like venom.

"I told you I don't want you going back to your old ways! But I can't hinder you. It's your decision. I want… I… I… can't… I…" _Love you!_ Her heart filled in for her. She felt like puking. Panic started to rise in her chest. Him so close, blocking her way out. She couldn't run, but she desperately wanted to run. She had to get out of there, before something happened she could not take back. She remembered the situation a few nights ago in his kitchen and felt herself panicking even more. And suddenly Tony was even closer. He was everywhere. Everything in her world suddenly was _him_. She had to get away from him. "I don't want to do this right now. I want…" _I_ _AM IN LOVE WITH YOU! NO SHUT UP! NO I AM NOT._ He was getting into her head. She tried to shove him back, but he caught her arms and held her. So Pepper started hitting him, struggling against his grip while staring at him and tried once again, screaming: "I want…"

"What do you want, Pepper?!" Tony asked at her, words coming out calm and… reassuring?

"I don't know!" She screamed at him.

Suddenly his hands were on her neck, framing her face, and his lips were so damn close. Time stood still and it felt like a thousand years had passed, since he had touched her. And another thousand years would have to pass until his lips would reach their goal. But a thousand years seemed like they weren't enough. Yet at the same time, never had she ever wanted a thousand years to pass quicker.

And suddenly she found herself willing to finally give in and just let got. _Finally_ said her heart, too as she closed her eyes, leaning in to meet Tony halfway, clutching his shirt above the reactor.

And as thousand years had finally passed, she heard the closet-door and reality came crashing back over her and it brought panic along.

"I will kill you, Rhodey!" She heard Tony mumble angrily.

She shoved Tony backwards, out of the closet into the hallway and saw Rhodey's wide eyes for a split second before she was out of the room, through the front door and out into the night.

* * *

**_Please don't hate me. Please don't hate me. Please don't hate me._  
****I know we all need fluff after Endgame, and it will come… eventually. But it will take some time for them to be happy. But I promise: it will be worth the wait. ****Please leave a review, so I know you're still there.  
****Also any complaints, let me know! **

**Thanks to LalaLena96! **


	8. Iris

**Chapter 8 - Iris**

**Thank you for all your reviews! I am so overwhelmed. Each and everyone means the world to me!**

**Ok I am sorry for the minor delay. I originally had another chapter I wanted to post, but then I had this idea and couldn't get it out of my head, but then I hated it and NOW I AM RAMBLING.  
****Anyways I think this chapter is a bit lame and I am sorry about that. Still it took me some time to write, so now you just have to get through it like I did.  
****But: If you guys are nice I, might post the next chapter by the middle of the week, since it's already written and sitting on my hard drive.  
****Song: Iris by Goo Goo Dolls**

* * *

It was late afternoon when Tony finally rose from his slumber.

His head was pounding and his mouth was dry.

"Good afternoon, Sir. It's 2:47 pm, the weather is currently 72°, slightly cloudy…"

"Mute J. Send Pepper up with some coffee and Advil." He groaned and pulled the covers over his head.

"I am afraid I can't do that, Sir. When you first woke this morning at 9 am, you instructed me to call her and give her the day off. Given last nights activities and your and her blood-alcohol level I assumed it, indeed was best to that." The AI informed him. "But Butterfingers is on his way up with ibuprofen and water."

Last night activities… Tony didn't want to think about those at the moment. He felt bad for what had happened. Especially about how he had treated Pepper all night long and about how the night had ended or the way she had practically fled his arms.  
After she had left, Tony hadn't wanted to go home at all. He had drank even heavier and had only went home when Rhodey had practically thrown him and the few last people out, saying he wanted to be alone now. It didn't go unnoticed that Jade had been nowhere to be seen.

Looking at his phone Tony had three missed calls from Rhodey. Listening to one of his mailbox messages, Rhodey seemed to be royally pissed at him and demanding from him to call him back as soon as possible. Tony would do so eventually, but right now he didn't want to fight with him. Or anyone for the matter.  
Pepper on the other hand hadn't called yet. Not even once. There were no missed calls from her or any unread messages. He wasn't sure whether she was pissed at him as well or just enjoying her day off. But Tony knew her so he anticipated she would be avoiding him like hell today and probably would so for the next few days. Whether it was out of embarrassment or anger, he wasn't sure.  
He couldn't blame her for this reaction, though. One minute she was screaming at him and the next he was trying to kiss her.

Yet Tony felt like his behavior had been justified. She had been avoiding the real issue: the _thing_ between them. The _thing_ being their clear attraction toward each other, which seemed to be multiplying each and every day they worked together by ten. Still she wasn't willing to admit any of it. Neither to herself, nor to him.  
And then, seeing her getting touchy with Alex had just hit a nerve.  
Tony wasn't proud of it, ashamed even, but he had seen red. In this moment he had wanted to hurt her. He had wanted a quit-pro-quo. Hurt her like she had hurt him, and shoving it in her face.

He knew there was nothing going on between her and Alex, just a simple flirt. He could probably blame her actions on the alcohol, but he had been drunk as well. Seeing her feeling Alex up, kissing with strangers and seemingly being comfortable around that guy had hurt him. And the hurt in combination with alcohol unfortunately had made him short sighted and irrational.  
Now in the light of the afternoon sun, which came through the large ocean windows he was ashamed and wanted to apologize.  
Not only for his behavior, but for all nights events.

He wanted to beg for her forgiveness, for making a fool of her with stating she obviously loved him and calling her a liar in front of everyone, for going out with Tanice and making it look like they had hit it on. He wanted to apologize for drinking heavily, and for insulting her and calling her names. He needed to ask for forgiveness for invading her space and touching her without permission and for pushing her inside the closet.  
And he needed to apologize for the woman. Women, to be correct. But he didn't want to think about that now. There was a more urgent matter.

Because he mostly wanted - no, needed to apologize for making her cry. If there was a way to apologize for something like this, at all.  
The way she had looked when he had returned with Tanice. The way she hadn't shown any movement and not even reacted to Happy at first. He'd never forget that and he never wanted to see her like this ever again. And he had even then made a nasty remark about her being buttoned up and prude.  
Now he felt terrible for that. He now remembered how her eyes had glistened and he knew that her stiffness had been a sign of her struggling to keep herself together.  
Revenge really was a dark feeling.  
And now it made him sick to his stomach.

With a sigh Tony rose from his bed and padded towards the bathroom. A long, hot shower might help scrubbing away last nights events. After brushing his teeth he felt at least a little better. Before he entered the wardrobe to change, he took the water and ibuprofen Butterfingers had left on one of his drawers.  
Pictures of Pepper and how her puffy eyes had looked at him flashed before his eyes. If he didn't knew any better he'd say she had been pleading with him to finally act on his feelings.

Tony sighed. He needed to get his thoughts in order. There were too many of them floating around in his head and what better way to do it than tinkering around with his new reactor and modify the suit.

* * *

A few hours later Tony was stuck. He ran into a problem with his latest suit-model Mark V, which had yet to be tested in battle. The repulsers just wouldn't work properly. They either fired way to heavy and sent him flying backwards, while shooting - face first into his wall, thank you very much - or barely caused more harm, than a dark smear on paper.

"J, turn on Peppers playlist. Volume 35%." He ordered his AI. He rarely listened to her music, since she didn't prefer metal or hard rock, but sometimes when he had trouble concentrating he actually preferred her calmer music taste.  
The first notes of a random Ed Sheeran song filled the workshop, followed by James Blunt, The Script and numerous other various artists. At one point he had managed to tune out the chords completely and was now elbows deep back inside his project, evicting the error. Until he heard some familiar guitar chords which made him stop in his tracks.

_And I'd give up forever to touch you  
__'Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
__You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be  
__And I don't want to go home right now_

For a spilt second he really had thought he had her. For a split second he had come close to heaven. And then Rhodey had interrupted them. Tony wasn't religious and he didn't particularly believe in god, but if there were a god and an afterlife, Tony was pretty sure with Pepper he would come close. She really completed him, made him wanting to be a better man for her. Yet she encouraged him to simply be himself. Just Tony. Not Tony Stark the billionaire, Playboy, philanthropist, not Tony Stark the business man, not Iron Man. Just Tony. She saw him for who he really was. And he had come so close to heaven the other night, and it had been ripped away from him.

Thats why he had been mortified when she had left. And Tony really hadn't wanted go home after she had turned him down. Much rather he had wanted to drown his hurt in alcohol and other things.

_And all I can taste is this moment  
__And all I can breathe is your life  
__And sooner or later it's over  
__I just don't wanna miss you tonight_

Still one train of thoughts didn't leave his head: Had he been wrong? Hadn't she leaned in, too? Hadn't Pepper crumbled under his hands, saying she didn't know what she wanted, yet not shying away from his touch. Hadn't he seen a flicker of desire in her big ocean blue eyes, that had been filled otherwise with hurt and confusion and uncertainty and sadness, unbearable sadness. Tony really had wanted to taste her so badly, to kiss her senseless, make her doubts go away and to at last know what it would be like to finally be with her.

He longed to see those eyes sparkle again, in his direction. But next time hopefully not with tears like they had the other night, no he wanted to see them sparkle with joy, devotion, with love. Tony would give everything to see those eyes slide close before he fell asleep and to observe how they flutter open in the morning. In his dreams he saw them sparkling at him then. But in reality they had sparkled too. But with tears.  
He wondered briefly if she would have tasted like salt and despair. He had nearly been able to taste the saltiness of her tears and her panic, and it had burned itself inside his brain. Tony made himself the promise to never taste this combination again and to eventually replace it the taste of happy tears and love.

However, what was still stronger and more prominent was her smell: flowers and soap underlying with something spicy that was purely her.  
It was still lingering in his clothes on his bedroom floor and therefore in his bedroom itself. When he really concentrated her could even get a whiff of her smell lingering in his workshop. And truth to be told, it drove him crazy.  
But what really killed him was the moment he went past her room or how she called it: her makeshift office. When Tony closed his eyes he could pretend she was there, in his house, still working for him. Her smell was like a drug. No it was more than that: If he were honest, her smell was like oxygen to him. He needed it to survive.

That brought out another thought. He nearly had died and she still did not know that. He hadn't had the guts to be honest with her, to tell her he had been dying. But now it was too late, wasn't it? It had been month since he synthesized the new element. If the topic would ever come up he would tell her the truth. He was through with lying to her, but now there wasn't a point in coming forward and worrying her.

Yet his little encounter with the perspective of dying the next day had shown him, that it could be over sooner rather than later.  
His biggest fear when he had been dying, had been that he wouldn't be able to tell Pepper how he really felt. That he couldn't have shown her, he really had been serious, that he had honest intentions, he was ready for a relationship.  
Him making Pepper the successor of Stark Industries had been his first move to secure her future. Not her financial future. He knew Pepper would be able to stop working this very second and live a very spoiled life. He payed he a ton of money each and every month and threw in a very generous bonus every know and then, for keeping up with his antics. No he had wanted to secure her the one thing he knew she cared for as much as he did: His company, his legacy. It had been one of the best decisions he had ever made. And he had been right. She was doing so great with the company as CEO.

"Don't waste it… don't waste your life, Stark." Yinsen had said. Yet Tony had come close to doing just that with his stupid behavior over the last few month. But that was about to change. Not many people get second chances, and almost none get thirds. He sure as hell was gonna make this one count now. When it could be over any second, he had to make sure every second counted. And that's what he was trying to do with Pepper now.

He didn't want to miss out on being with her any longer. He was craving her, craving her like a moth craved the light.

_And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming  
__Or the moment of truth in your lies  
__When everything feels like the movies  
__Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive_

Problem was, she didn't want to be with him. Or at the very least she was very reluctant in even considering his advances.

When Pepper had just disappeared on him last night, he had been furious with Rhodey for interrupting them, but he had felt his heart sink at the sight of her practically fleeing him.

Still she had given in to him. He was sure she had leant forward herself, like she had on that balcony so long ago.  
So yes, he had been sad, but now thinking about it, Tony again had the suspicion she was losing a battle against herself.

He knew her and he knew she was a bad liar. When Jay had asked his truth question towards Pepper and she was avoiding all eyes, Tony knew she wasn't being honest. Leave it to his drunk, rude ass to confront her in front of everyone, backing her into a corner, practically willing to force her into admitting she is in love with him. Yes, she had said she didn't love him, trying to hold on to her dignity in public. But she had said it before, being involved with your former boss wouldn't make her look good. Especially now that she was CEO. The press would have a field day.

But had she really denied it when they had been alone? She had said there was nothing to admit. She had never actually denied it. Because maybe there really wasn't anything to admit? Either because she actually had no feelings or… or…

_Or there is nothing to admit, because it is already clear as day, she feels the same for me. _Tony thought. And he remembered.

Her shiny, red eyes when he stepped down the tarmac, her fear when she first caught him the suit, her quitting on him… Looking back at the day he had asked her to get the files from Obadiah, he now realized she probably didn't just quit for him endangering his life. He had done so plenty of times before. He had said there was nothing else than the next mission after he had left her by herself on the balcony. She probably took this a her proof he hasn't been serious with her. _Silly girl.  
_Actually he had never been more truthful to anyone before, when he had danced with her. She did look stunning, no breathtaking in that blue dress and he had wanted to kiss her, but she had pulled away.

Now that he thought about it, she never actually denied his girlfriend proposal he had given her prior to the conference.  
The times she had actually turned him down were… never.  
Even at his disastrous Birthday Party she had just ignored his advances. Her other turn downs had been out of fear, she had even admitted that.

_"__Our friendship is extraordinary. We compliment each other so well, because we know better than to bring feelings - romantic feelings - into the mix. You are compassionate with your projects and I keep you and your company in line. Neither of us would have time to fit a relationship in there.  
__Being friends, just friends is the one logical way for us to work. A relationship would make our carefully constructed card house crumble. But our friendship makes it invincible. And I'd rather have us as friends invincible, than in a relationship and regretting it later on."  
_

She had never once said a single word about not feeling something for him. Not. One. Word.

Except she did. Last night. Yesterday she had said she didn't feel for him this way. But the way she had said it was out of spite and anger. And she had not even been able to use the words love or boyfriend. In the end she had given in. Until Rhodey had decided to show up.  
But this was progress, wasn't it?  
Yes Pepper Potts was a bad liar.  
But now Tony knew it wasn't about not being in love with him, it was about _being_ in love with him.

Tony felt like they were stuck in some shitty rom-com movie.

Maybe he just needed to show her, what she was missing and what she could have with him. Really show her.  
Although she knew him better than anyone did, even better than Rhodey, he knew he had to show her more of his real self. Show her less of the playboy Tony Stark and more of just Tony and the man, he knew he could become with her by his side.

"Sir, you wanted me to remind you of this weeks events." Jonas his new assistant spoke overt the intercom, pulling him from his thoughts.

"I'll be right up." Tony answered and ran up the stairs towards the living area.

Jonas briefed him about the weeks events, meetings and business stocks, while Tony was barely listening.

"Oh one last thing, I took your tux to the dry cleaner and the entry tickets have arrived. I left them on the kitchen counter."

"Thank you, Jonas. I'll be back downstairs, if you need me." Tony said, the wheels in his head already turning. He moved towards the kitchen and picked up the envelope laying on the counter.  
He had completely forgotten about it, but his opportunity for showing Pepper the real him was now laying in his hands.  
Tony opened it and pulled out one engraved card, his thumb running over the red and gold letters:

_Children in Need - Christmas Fundraiser_

* * *

_And I don't want the world to see me  
__'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
__When everything's meant to be broken  
__I just want you to know who I am_

* * *

**Well… Yeah. Here it is. **

**Remember: if you leave me some love, I promise to update by Friday at the latest!**


	9. Classic

**Chapter 9 - Classic**

**It's Thursday, it's late, I haven't slept more than 10 hours in the last 4 days and it had been over 95° Fahrenheit/ 35° Celsius for the last 10 consecutive days. One day it was over 104° Fahrenheit / 40° Celsius.  
****I am a wreck.  
****All mistakes: I blame them on my sleep deprived, now cooked trough brain.**

**Please leave me some love on this one and thank you for all the reviews so far. Keep them coming (:**

**Song: Classic by MKTO**

* * *

**Classic**

Her legs gave away under her. All she could do was manage to not hit the ground with full force. The sobs ripping through her body were just too much for her fragile frame and she sank down to her knees, face covered in her hands, not able to hold back the flood of tears any longer. It had started so well and now she was sitting here on a red carpet in her lace gown, crying her heart out. Thankfully there weren't any reporters left.

She didn't know what had happened or why their dynamics had changed in a heartbeat. She couldn't put her finger on the moment when it had all went downhill. All she knew, what she had feared most, had eventually happened. Her heart was shattered in pieces. But she was certain, so was his….

* * *

**_Three Weeks earlier_**

Tony had had one mission in Vietnam, where people used his weapons to threaten a whole village in order to take what little they had to give. It really was astounding where Obi had sold his weapons. That man had had no consciousness at all.  
The mission had gone smoothly, Tony had destroyed his weapons and handed the burglars to the military police.

However on his way back his old suite and new reactor seemed to have a communication problem. Over the Indian Ocean his suit just didn't want to function any more. With a lot of rather painful shorts and a quick stop at a military base - Thank you Rhodey - he at least made it back home in one piece and with out any harm.

Instead of going to any of the meetings Jonas - his new PA - had scheduled for him he worked on his suit to fix the problem. Nothing new there.

Pepper had called several times, making sure he was alright and his mission was going smoothly. Tony hadn't told her about the problems. She still didn't know about his new reactor and that he had been dying. After all that had happened since New York, their fight and now he never found the right time to tell her. And he didn't want her pity. So Tony just told her there was a problem with the suit that needed fixing, but not anything further about the circumstances.  
She had scolded him for not attending his meetings and completely ignoring Jonas. He was n nice young man, just out of college with the best grades you could get, but he was no Pepper Potts. It's simple as that.

"Sir," Jonas Voile sounded over the intercom. "You have an invitation to the _Children in Need - Christmas Fundraiser _in three month_._ Do you want to confirm or decline?"

Tony normally hated those galas, but he loved the Christmas gala for children. It was a masquerade ball and he loved dressing up. Also he remembered the way Pepper had looked last year and it had knocked him off his feet. Literally. He hadn't recognized her a first and had been hitting on her quite suggestively. Also because of the alcohol he might had had touched her inappropriately. Pepper had shoved him and he had fallen into a passing waiter.

"Is Pepper going?" Tony asked back.

"I'll check with her assistant, Sir." There were a few silent seconds until his voice came on again. "Miss Potts confirmed half an hour ago, Sir."

"Great. Book me in, Jo."

* * *

**_Three Days earlier_**

"Hey Pep. Can we talk?" Tony stood in her office doorway, casually leaning against the frame, arms crossed and looking at Pepper intently.

It was three days after Rhodey's birthday.

The day after the party, Tony had still been too hungover to function, so he had had JARVIS call Pepper and tell her to stay at home. To say she was relieved would have been an understatement, since her own head had been killing her and she had had visited the bathroom a little more often than usual.  
Over the last three days their relationship had gone back to normal. What ever normal meant for and billionaire philanthropist - who coincidentally happened to be Iron Man at the same time - and a fortune 500 CEO. Well returning to normal hadn't been hard. They hadn't seen or talked to each other since then.

"Oh, hi Tony." She wasn't looking at him, her focus on her laptop screen, but her tone was light.

"Just give me a second, I have to finish those reports for the upcoming week. I'll be with you in…" She glanced at her watch. "… 20 minutes?"

He pushed away from the door, told her to meet him in the shop and went downstairs.

Sharply 20 minutes later Pepper turned down his music as she made her way over to him.

"You wanted to talk?" She asked and smiled at him, which was odd. He figured she might wanted to have his head for his behavior towards her or she would avoid him altogether since what had nearly happened in the closet.

"Yeah, listen I wanted to apologize for what I said to you…" He started but Pepper interrupted him.

"Tony, don't worry! Honestly after the first few round of spin the bottle everything is a bit… blurry." She _giggled_. Pepper never giggled. Something was up. "I have no idea what happened after a certain point, there are just bits and pieces. Confusing bits and pieces, but what ever happened, let's just forget it."

"Potts, what do you remember? Why are you in such a good mood?" He asked her wearily.

"Oh it's nothing really. I am just in a good mood. The vacation day was much needed and I am genuinely relaxed for the first time in forever." Tony then noticed she indeed looked a lot healthier than he had seen since… he didn't know since when. At least since he had made her CEO. She wasn't as pale, her skin seemed to glow more than usual and the dark circles under her eyes had considerably faded.

Little did Tony know, 20 minutes ago Pepper had not only worked on her reports, but had a conversation with Alex via sms. He had asked whether she was interested in having dinner with him the other day and Pepper was more than happy to oblige. But she couldn't tell him that. He would be crazy jealous and Pepper would never hear the end of it. Also she wasn't sure whether Alex had serious intentions or whether he just wanted to be friends. So: no need to alert sleeping dogs, Pepper figured.

She continued:  
"As for you first question, I remember dancing with you and Happy, Rhodey… Alex? I remember you and Jimmy kissing, Happy and Ellis kissing, you climbing on top of Rhodey's roof - which I am still mad about, by the way - Alex puking his guts out after he did the kings cup. After that it gets very confusing and dark. I distinctly remember something with a pool…" She trailed off and wrinkled her forehead in thought trying to remember. Actually a few blurry images came to her eyes. "But nooo. No way. That must be wrong. I'd never skinny dip." Pepper laughed slightly on that ridiculous thought.

"You did." Tony told her, wincing slightly and watched her face turn bright red. She groaned, hid her face in her hands and sat down on his couch very embarrassed.

"You are a wild drunk, Pep. Who would have figured?" He laughed and pulled her hands away from her face.

Pepper was mortified and hated how she lost all self-control when she was drunk.  
"Please tell me, I at least didn't cry." Crying was her last stage of being drunk. And once she started crying there was no turning back. And she'd cry for the silliest reasons while being drunk. She once cried three hours over a bowl which wouldn't fit into her fridge after a party.

"Not that I recall, but you looked kind of puffy around the eyes, after you returned from your seven minutes in heaven with Happy." If she didn't remember, he wouldn't tell her it had been him who had upset her in the first place. "I knew Happy wasn't your type. But that he is so bad you had to cry, even surprised me."

"Tony!" Pepper scolded him, trying to look displeased, but she couldn't quite hide her smile. "I think it's save to say he wouldn't take advantage of drunk woman, unlike some other people here."

"- I knew that Alex guy was a creep." Tony joked and Pepper shot him a glare, but otherwise ignored his quip against Alex.

"So I am pretty sure it had nothing to do with Happy's skills. Besides Ellis seemed to be doing just fine with him." Now they were just bickering and being back to their usual selfs. "Also, what do you mean Happy isn't my type. How would you know what my type is anyways?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"I know you Potts." He was glad she didn't remember how disastrous their evening had ended and he enjoyed playing their well known game.

"Ah, you know me. So spill, Stark. What is my type then?"

"I am." She wanted to wipe the smug grin off his face.

"You are?" She asked and seized him up and down. "How do you come to think of it?"

"I see it in the way you look at me." He said and eyed her intently, shooting a smirk her way.

"The way I look at you?" Pepper asked laughingly, stood and started moving for the shop door.

"Like you'll faint every minute." Pepper just laughed at that. Yes, he was grateful she wasn't mad.

"When you're back to reality, come find me. In the meantime I have work to do." She was out the door, on her way back to her office.

That evening when she left, Pepper found a small envelope under her wiper.  
It was an entry ticket for the _Children in Need Christmas Fundraiser_ three days from now. She had received the invitation as well. Since she was CEO now, she of course would have gotten one. But Pepper knew this was his way of asking her to go there together.  
The envelop also contained one of his credit cards, which meant he wanted her to buy herself a new dress, if she'd like.

-O-

Over the course of more mission the day of the fundraiser came pretty quick.

"J, call Jonas, he needs to pick up my tux and I need his input."

"Sir, Mr. Hevensby already delivered your tuxedo and is currently in his office, sorting through your emails." JARVIS replied.

"Put him on the com, J." Tony said absentmindedly, while fiddling with his suit.

"Sir? Your AI said you needed to talk to me?" Jonas young voice came over the intercom.

"Jonas prepare a sandwich for me and meet me in my closet in 10 minutes." With that Tony, twisted his last screw and wiped his hands on a towel.

He showered, shaved and put on his dress pants and undershirt in under 15 minutes and went to his closet where he had told his PA to meet him.  
"Did you reach Miss Potts?" Tony asked him while he took the sandwich and started munching on it.

"Yes, Sir. She said you should pick her up by seven." Jonas sat the plate down and took out Tony's watch box. He opened the lid and showed its contents to his Boss. "Any preferences, Sir?"

"First, please stop calling me Sir. I feel like my father. Second, Speedmaster, Omega." Tony took the watch from his hands and fastened it around his wrist. "Did Pepper mention what she will be wearing tonight?" He tried to ask as casually and nonchalantly as possible but Jonas smiled knowingly at him.

"Do you want to match her, Boss?" His grin widened slightly and his eyebrow crooked.

"See, Boss is way better than Sir. Wait? Did you just tease me? I am starting to like you, Jonas." He turned to take one of his cufflinks. "So… did she mention something."

"I did not see the dress. But, she send me a few pictures when she went shopping and asked for opinions. I guess it's save to say you should choose a neutral color. Especially since you are wearing black tie and not just a normal suit." While talking he had pulled out a white pocket square, folded it and handed it to Tony. "I'll be waiting downstairs."

When Tony was finished he looked himself over in the mirror, his black hair lay in thick waves on his head, except for a few strands in the front, his goatee was shaved to perfection. Tony smiled at himself. He knew Pepper always had a hard time resisting his appearance in a tux.

"Sir, don't forget your masque." Jonas said and handed Tony his black satin masque, which had only a few black-greenish feathers on the side.

"Oh thanks, Jo. If it wasn't for you, I'd have totally forgotten it's a masquerade ball."

He took the masque from his hands and moved towards the car, as Jonas held the door open. Inside Tony instructed Happy to drive to Pepper's.

20 Minutes later he rang her doorbell.

He could hear hustling behind the door and Pepper shouted "One minute" before the hustle intensified. Tony, amused, leaned against the doorframe and listened. Then he heard her heels clicking over the floor and towards him, when the door swung open, along with his jaw.

He could not say anything and just openly gaped at her, mouth hanging wide open. Pepper looked at him quizzically and her face reddened in that awfully cute way. It didn't help his momentary shock at all.  
"Wow." Was all he could say. She was even more breathtaking than she had been in a certain blue backless dress. Pepper's hair was halfway up I a complicated bun, but strands hung loosely around her head in bouncy, luxurious curls. She wore diamond earrings and a matching bracelet. A necklace wasn't necessary, since her studded collar illuminated her features enough on its own. Her shoulders were free at the top, but her neckline went tightly around her upper arms. The dress was mainly black in color, but when the light hit the right angle one would notice, that the fabric was indeed very tight lace, with a dark burgundy color underneath. It went down to the bottom in a flowing pattern - not quite a mermaid dress, but not really an a-line too - she could easily walk in. Her make-up was light and neutral, yet she looked absolutely stunning, glowing from within. A natural beauty.

In her hands she held the venetian-style masque in black and silver with the same burgundy color like her dress around the eyes. Jokingly she held it up up to her face and a gorgeous smile illuminated her face.  
She looked even more delicious with the masque around her eyes, and it some how made her lips look more plump. Tony gulped and he had to take a deep breath.

He couldn't help it but admire her sense of style and the way she always handled her self with utmost grace. Virginia _Pepper_ Potts really _was_ the epitome of class. She might think differently and he got why she would think of herself otherwise, but he would prefer her over some blond, brainless, busty bimbo everyday. Pepper Potts was one of a kind. One of a very rare kind.  
She was not operated, there was nothing fake about her. Not on her body and not in her character. She was the kind of woman, that was timeless. She was never going out of style.

"Tony are you alright?" Pepper asked as they stood in front of the Bentley, while Tony's knuckles had turned white from griping it. Yet he never opened the door for her, and just continued staring at her. He didn't even remember walking to the car.

"I aaah… I…" He wanted to tell so badly how good she looked, but it just wouldn't come out. So he just smiled sheepishly and scratched the back of his head. "Yes I am fine. Let's go." He opened the door for her and they sat in silence across from each other. He really wanted to kiss her. Bad. And it certainly didn't help that she handed him the masque and asked him to tie it for her.  
His masque lay still on one of the seats, but had an elastic band to fasten it around his head easily.

Pepper talked to Happy on their way, but Tony didn't listen. He couldn't take his mind - and eyes for the matter - off of her. As they finally reached their location Happy opened the door. To Tony's dismay Happy helped Pepper out of the car.

"Pepper, you look gorgeous." Happy told her and Tony wanted to hit him. And himself. Why was it so easy for Happy to compliment the most amazing woman on the planet.

"Thank you, Happy." Pepper smiled and squeezed his shoulder, smiling slightly and reddening.

"Pep, we should get inside." Tony said gently and placed his hand on her lower back, guiding her towards the entrance. They paused briefly for some pictures and a few interview question, the first being who's underneath the masque. Pepper made sure everything stayed professional. She did not need any rumors flying around.  
As they entered the ballroom it was already lightly crowded.

"A drink, Miss Potts?" Tony asked and looked at her.

"Oh yes, please." It had been a long day for Pepper and she really wasn't in the mood for tonights benefit.

"Martini, extra dry, extra olives?" Tony asked teasingly, returning to his old self, smirking at her.

"You remember that." Pepper breathed out and turned pink again. Something hit her guts wiggled when she thought about he remembered her favorite drink.

"I remember all things, concerning you, Pep." His glance was so intense and pure, Pepper had to look away. And then she saw him.  
Alex. He was in his uniform and a blue and white masque, looking drop dead gorgeous. To be honest, if he hadn't been talking to Rhodey, Pepper probably wouldn't have recognized him with the masque. Alex's eyes caught hers across the room and as he realized who he was looking at he smiled. Apparently he told Rhodey that they were there, because he too turned and they both headed over to them.

Tony groaned and grabbed Peppers arm, trying to get her attention back. "So Pep, Martini?"

"Eh… no. I'll have a champagne, please." Pepper smiled at him, but turned to greet Rhodey and Alex half way. "Hi, you two look very handsome." She smiled at them and her eyes sparkled.

He couldn't believe it. She had just stood him up. Her back was now turned to him, blocking his view of Alex. Tony could only see Rhodey smiling at Pepper, not even noticing him. He couldn't blame him. Pepper was natural looker and could easily attract every mens attention to her. But tonight, she was breathtaking.  
That's why he was furious, because she wasn't _his_.  
As Tony reached the bar he ordered the drinks and tipped the bartender generously. While he waited for his drinks he stood and observed the group on the other side of the room. Pepper was casually chatting with Rhodey and Alex, occasionally touching one or the other while she laughed or when she asked a question.  
Tony felt slight jealousy rising in him, but the longer he looked at her the more he felt admiration bubble inside of him.

The way Pepper handled herself, so gentle and nice, yet always professional, leaving no doubt she could snap one in half with only one glance. He never met a single woman who combined so many good character traits in one person. Her over all appearance and character was enhanced by the way she dressed. Always chic and sophisticated, never over the top. Still she managed to always look out of this world. She was old school chic, but in a good way.  
And tonight she really had knocked it out of the park. Her black-burgundy dress, which hugged her figure so perfectly, the matching heels and that masque. The way she looked with it was like a punch in the gut. It knocked the air from his lungs. It made her look secretive and mysterious, yet seductive and sexy at the same time, while she still looked unreachable. Like a freaking goddess.  
Suddenly Pepper turned and looked at him across the room. When she saw he was looking at her too, she smiled. And holy hell. It blew him away.  
She really was up there with the all time icons. Hepburn, Kelly and Monroe got nothing on her. There wasn't ever, nor will there ever be someone like her. SHE, Virginia Potts, really was the _definition_ of class.

* * *

**Three Hours earlier**

"Pepper! You. Look. Amazing." Rhodey said and kissed her cheek.

Pepper blushed, returned his smiles, but waved her hand at him. "Rhodey stop. You are making me blush."

"But he is true." Alex interjected and took her hand, kissing it. "You are beautiful."

Pepper noticed he had used _are_ and not _look_ and it turned her an even darker shade of crimson.

"Thank you." Was all she managed. He really had left her speechless. And Alex looked dashing in his dark navy suit, with honor medals scattered around his jacket. It really accentuated his blue eyes and dark blond hair.

She didn't know how much time had passed between the two of them just staring and smiling at each other, but Rhodey coughed uncomfortable and asked whether he should get lost, not without winking at Alex.

Suddenly Tony re-appeared and rudely shove a glass of champagne into her hands and handed Rhodey a Whiskey.

"Tony. Man. Good to see you." Rhodey said and clapped him on the shoulder. "Listen we have to talk about some modifications for my suit."

Rhodey rambled on, but Tony was only half listening. His eyes were set on Pepper and Prince Charming and their conversation. She seemed to be enjoying herself with him. She looked relaxed and followed the conversation easily. Alex on the other hand looked like he had some real interest in getting to know her. He held the conversation, asking a question about her or wanted to know her opinion one time or an other.  
Tony really admired Pepper and her ability to know when to speak and when to listen. She was so good at holding casual conversations and small talk.  
Suddenly Tony felt a pang in his chest. What if she was interest in him, too? What if this was more than just small talk? What if she genuinely liked this bloke? He felt… could it really be? It couldn't. Americas greatest Playboy wouldn't feel something as mundane as that. He could not be jealous, could he?  
He didn't recognize at first when Pepper turned toward him and said something.

"Tony?" She asked again, but laughed. "Come back to earth. Jeez, you were totally gone."

"What? Sorry I… I was thinking about… Thinking about Rhodey's suit. And some upgrades and JARVIS." He stammered and looked at Rhodey.

"I was asking if you could hold my glass." She smiled and stretched her half empty glass in his direction.

"Why?" It came out harsher than he had intended, but her question irritated him.

"Um… Alex asked me to dance." Her thumb pointed behind her to the man standing there waiting for her to go with him.

"You don't dance." Was all he could think of, still not talking her glass.

"What?" Pepper was now glaring at him. Her face left no doubt that she was getting pissed.

"At the firefighter benefit you said, you don't dance." Tony added warily. He knew he made it worse, but his mouth unfortunately was too quick for his mind.

"I said I don't dance with my boss. In front of everyone I know. You know what, forget it." And she turned toward Rhodey, handing him her glass. "Jimmy, would you please?"

"Of course, Pep." He took it from her hurriedly. Pepper smiled at him and mouthed a _Thank you_. Then she took Alex arm, glared at Tony and stalked off to the dance floor.

"Man you got it bad." Rhodey sighed.

"What? Why am I now the asshole? I just don't want her to be dancing with some creepy guy, she doesn't know. I am looking out for my friend." He said and knocked his drink back.

"Tony everything, what had just happened will only push her further away. You have to show her, that you are mature and grown up. And most importantly that you trust her. I am afraid you might lose her for good, if you don't do it soon." Rhodey said and clapped him on the shoulder.

Tony hated to admit it, but Rhodey was right. It was time to show Pepper the man he could become. And it was starting know.

"I'll be back in a second." Tony said and moved away from Rhodey.

"Tony, what…" But he was already gone. After a minute though he returned.

"Where have you gone? What did you do?" Rhodey asked.

"I spoke to the DJ." Before he could elaborate any further Pepper and Alex returned. Rhodey handed her the glass back and Tony went to refill his and Rhodey's drink, inviting Alex to tag along.

"Pepper, is everything alright?" Rhodey asked her warily.

"Sure, why wouldn't it be? Alex is such a nice guy! And a really good dancer, I have to admit." She took a sip and waited for her answer.

"I mean are you and Tony alright?"

"I am just tired of his antics, to be honest." Pepper sighed.

"Have you talked about what had happened at the Party?" Rhodey knew Tony didn't wanted to talk about it, and probably he was still mad at him, for interrupting them. But maybe Pepper needed to get it off her chest.

Suddenly she turned pale and looked angry at him. "Nothing happened at your party. Do you understand me?" The words were hissed through gritted teeth. She really was frightening when she was mad.

"Ok. But just know, tonight… he was just looking out for you."

Before Pepper could say another word, the two other man returned.

"Pep," Tony turned toward her and lightly touched her arm. "I am sorry. I should have just taken your glass. You're right."

Him apologizing was a first and her stomach began to flutter. _What? No stop! Stop fluttering._ But her anger was fading rapidly.

"Would you dance with me? I am not your boss anymore, after all." He gave her a smile. Not a Tony Stark smile, but a genuine one. One of those smiles, she knew were reserved only for her. And it involuntarily made her melt.

"I would love to dance, Tony." Alex and Rhodey took their glasses and Tony couldn't fail to notice, that Alex didn't look too thrilled, as they left for the dance floor. _Yeah, take that surfer boy,_ he thought as he held out his arm for Pepper to grab on.

Tony swung her around and took her in his arms. He nodded towards the DJ and took her hand, looking into her eyes.

The first tunes started playing and Pepper knew she was doomed…

**To be continued…**


	10. Dancing in the Dark

**Previously****: **

_"__I would love to dance, Tony." Alex and Rhodey took their glasses and Tony couldn't fail to notice, that Alex didn't look too thrilled, as they left for the dance floor. _

_Tony swung her around and took her in his arms. He nodded towards the DJ and took her hand, looking into her eyes. _

_The first tunes started playing and Pepper knew she was doomed… _

* * *

**Chapter 10 - Dancing in the Dark**

Pepper heard the soft guitar picks and felt Tony starting to sway with her in the musics rhythm. Still, she felt like she was glued to the ground. It was just too much: The song, the melody, him being so close. And then she felt his gaze on her. It was so intense and strong, she could cut the tension between them with a knife.

Pepper wasn't prepared when he suddenly took the first step forward to start their waltz. Still busy with her thoughts about how she would survive this, survive this dance, without shattering her heart into a billon pieces, she felt her body tense.  
She wanted to run so desperately. Maybe that was the reason why, when he took the first step, she stumbled and nearly fell.

"Pep, are you alright." Tony asked, after he helped her regain her footing. His right hand now rested on her elbow, as his left hand was still holding hers, while his eyes were full of worry.

"Ehm.. yes." Pepper didn't know what to say. She wanted to get away from him as fast as possible, but she could find the words to say so. Instead her mouth betrayed her: "I just lost my footing for a second. Must have slipped on my dress. Sorry. Go on."

Tony smiled at her and brought her close again, swaying two beats, then starting the dance.

10 couples danced around them, 1,2,3…1,2,3… Pepper tried concentrating on the beat, her steps, anything that wasn't his chocolate brown eyes, but she was losing quickly, sinking into them. He led her so effortlessly around the floor, she felt like she was flying.

"Am I making you uncomfortable?" He asked, smiling at her, remembering their conversation from a year ago.

"No." And this time it wasn't a lie. She really wasn't uncomfortable, she wasn't even nervous. No, Pepper Potts was scared. Shitless. Not because of what others were thinking. The few month she had been CEO had taught her to care even less about the opinions of others. And she wore a deodorant this time. No she was actually scared of him, and what she knew he was capable of doing to her. _Get a grip._ Her unconsciousness told her.

"Do you know your social security number by now?" She quipped, remembering the last time he threatened to fire her, to take the edge off.

"That's what I have you for." He gazed at her intensely, no hint of joking or mischief could be found in his eyes.

"Yeah, you do." Pepper breathed out and got lost in his eyes. Maybe she was done fighting him. She certainly was done thinking, as her brain seemed to have turned to mush and her insides now only consisted of something close to butterflies.

Slowly, couples started leaving the dance floor, though the song wasn't over yet, and aligned themselves around the floor, just watching the beautiful mysterious red-head and her handsome lead.

And then she heard him. She heard his voice, dark and smokey next to her left ear. He was humming along with the song, in perfect harmony. Pepper had heard him sing before and knew his voice was extraordinary - was there anything this man wasn't capable of? Goosebumps erupted all over her skin and shivers went up and down her spine.

"You know it's true, what he is singing." Tony whispered to her. "I too found a woman who is stronger than anyone. And you do carry all my secrets, and so much more. I mean you practically run my life."

Pepper didn't know what to say anymore. She felt her reserves slowly crumbling. Each look, each word and each step stripped her of her defenses. And ever so slowly he started to reach her heart. And she found, she was more than willing to let that happen. Pepper wanted him to tare down her walls and to finally allow herself to feel. To admit to him and to herself that she did love him, and maybe he could really be the man for her.

"You know, when I look at you I really see my future, Pep." He had laid all cards on the table for her. She just had to take them. But for now, Pepper just smiled promising at him, too stunned to say anything, just favoring the moment between them.

* * *

From where Rhodey and Alex stood they could see the sparks flying between the two of them.

"So, are they an item?" Alex asked warily, thing to keep his voice light.

"No not really. I guess." Rhodey answered truthfully, his eyes still on his two best friends. "They just know each other very well and since basically for forever. I suppose, when you have been friends for so long with someone, you can't get around gaining a certain level of intimacy."

"Looks more than just friends to me." Alex said under his breath.

"I know, but they always had this chemistry with each other. There is nothing to it." Rhodey tried to assure his friend.

"For how long have they been friends already?" Alex asked interested, still looking over at the couple which was now nearly alone on the dance floor, Tony twirling Pepper around.

"9 years. Give or take. A few years after she became his PA." Rhodey said and shrugged. "Want another drink?" He asked.

* * *

When Tony rose his arm to twirl Pepper underneath it, she gladly did. As she stepped back into his embrace he pulled her even closer, his eyes drilling into hers.

"You look perfect… tonight."

As the song ended, neither of them moved, to absorbed in each others eyes. For a split second Pepper was certain she was going to kiss him, but before she could Tony spoke, his lips ghosting hers ever so slightly.  
This little caress alone left wanting, yearning for so much more.

"As much as I'd love to keep standing here, just looking at you, I suggest we get out of here, Pepper." And she knew he didn't mean getting out as in going to his bedroom, like he would suggest to every other girl. She knew he meant going outside. Getting some privacy.

"There is a rooftop patio here." She whispered, as breathless as he was, smiling at her own remark about their previous fundraiser.

8 minutes and a few stairs later they had made their way on to the roof, both now with a new drink in hand.

"This time at least I got my drink before we stepped outside." Pepper joked, smiling at him as she leaned against the railing, looking over the city lights.

Tony groaned and hung his head, as he leaned his hip against the railing. "I'll never live that down, will I?" He said it with a laugh.

Pepper in turn turned towards him and looked like she was thinking about something, head tilted to her right. "Hm… no." She too was giggling know. "Not so soon. But maybe you will make up for it some day."

He was barely able to resist her smile and he turned fully towards her, raising his glass.

"To making it up. Thank you for the dance, Miss Potts." Tony said and clinked his glass with hers.

"To making it up." Pepper echoed and took a sip. "And I have to thank you, Tony." She smiled warmly at him. "That… that was amazing. I never knew you could dance like this." He noticed her cheeks reddening underneath her masque.

"My mom made me take lessons when I was younger. I had my first when I was only 14… She loved classic ballroom dance." Tony smiled sincerely, reminiscing in memories.

"You really miss her, don't you?" Pepper asked quietly. His walls were completely down, she realized.

"Let's not talk about the past, Pep. The nights far too nice for a walk down memory lane." Tony finished his drink in one gulp. Pepper felt a little remorse, she thought they had finally reached a point where they could be open with each other, but she knew his parents were a delicate topic for him. Besides, he was right, now wasn't the best time to talk about such serious matters.

"So when did you learn to dance?" He asked her, trying to lighten the mood.

"After I started working as your PA, I took a few lessons. Figured I might need them. Turns out I was right." Pepper laughed and took another sip. "Though I can barely keep up with your skills."

"I am sure your skills are just fine." Pepper nearly spit her drink at his implication, but Tony remained calm. "Will you dance with me again?" Tony asked and held his hand out to her.

"But we don't have music out here." Pepper laughed, but took his hand anyways.

"We could always sing." Tony smirked and took her into his arms, closer than before. His arm snaking around her back, the other holding her hand, pressing it to his chest. Involuntarily her head went to rest on his shoulder, forehead and nose pressing into his neck. She felt like they were an old couple, dancing their last dance and she never wanted to stop.

7th heaven: It was the only way to describe the feeling when Tony danced with her.  
Close and slow. No fancy waltz. Just a slow sway from the left to the right.  
She felt it before she heard it. He was humming the tunes from before.  
After a minute or so he also started singing quietly.

"Baby, I'm dancing in the dark, with you between my arms, barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song. When I saw you in that dress, looking so beautiful  
I don't deserve this, darling, you look perfect tonight"

His voice was outstanding. And hearing him sing just for her made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Pepper didn't even try to hide the grin, which spread over her face.

"I didn't know you knew Ed Sheeran." Pepper murmured into his shoulder, but he heard her anyways.

"I sometimes listen to your playlist, when I really have to concentrate." He admitted and Pepper lifted her head looking at him. "This song always reminds me of you. And tonight it's true. You do look perfect."

She never wanted to kiss him more desperately, then in this moment, but he spoke first.

"You know I'd bring you the moon and the stars, if you'd ask me too, Pepper?" He asked, but it really wasn't a question.

Pepper answered anyways: "I never doubted that, Tony." And she kissed his cheek, lingering there the felt his smile underneath her lips.

"Does it mean I have a real shot with you?" He asked and this time it wasn't rhetorical.

Pepper nodded and saw his smile - a genuine one - widen. Before he could do anything else she returned her head to his shoulder, his chin resting on her head now and they swayed to the music only they could hear.

"Thank you, Tony. " Pepper whispered into his neck.

"What for?" He asked, snickering lightly.

"For showing me the real you. I mean I know who you really are - a good person, but you rarely show it."

"I am trying to be a better person for you, Pep." Pepper lifted her head and saw he looked very determined.

"Let's toast to that. Becoming better people l mean." Pepper stepped out of his embrace and went to grab their glasses. Tony's was already empty she realized.  
"Let me quickly finish mine and we can get another round."Pepper said and went to finish her drink, but Tony stopped her.

"It's ok, Pepper. No need to rush. We've got all evening." He chuckled and put his hand at the rim of her glass. If he wasn't mistaken, and Tony rarely was, they had all the time in the world.

With a thankful smile Pepper sank down onto one of the deck chairs and looked up at him. "So tell me more about your ballroom dance. Did you do competitions?"

To her great pleasure, Pepper noticed Tony reddened slightly. "My mom always wanted me to be more social. I was just 14 and already at MIT. Textbook definition of a nerd. I had like… zero? friends and all I was doing was talking about physics and engineering all day, every day."

In her mind Pepper could see a smaller, younger version of Tony, sitting alone in a workshop talking to a prototype of DUM-E. She really felt sorry for the small, awkward kid that wasn't fitting anywhere in the world, too smart for his own goods.

"So my mom made me take dance lessons. I was never very good at sports. I was always too busy calculating the physic laws behind everything. But dancing, there are not really physics involved, except for gravity. And to be honest, being in such close proximity to other kids my age and especially girls made me uneasy at first.

6 weeks and my first course later I had finally found some friends. And my first girlfriend, if you'd like to call her that. Melissa Allistor. It lasted until our first official dance night at the end of our course." Pepper would have betted he had all the girls in his course, along with the instructor wrapped around his little finger after the first lesson.

"I see you were a tiger even back then." Pepper joked, but smiled at him. Tony didn't talk too often about his childhood, if you could call it that. Pepper only knew snippets about it and most of them Rhodey had told her. So in the rare times, when Tony did open up, Pepper enjoyed it all the more.  
Tony laughed and noticed Pepper was shivering slightly and had goosebumps all over her arms. Without saying anything about it Tony shrugged off his jacket and gently placed it around Peppers shoulders. She in turn took his hand and pulled him down next to her onto the chair, their knees pressed together, her hand casually laying on his knee.

"Oh yeah, " Tong answered dramatically. "It was wild and steamy. Oh if I could only tell you about the bad things we did. Naughty things." He looked at her mock-serious and shook his head.

"Oh yeah, I can imagine. Secret hand holding, passing notes, stepping onto each others feet." Pepper tried to look impressed, but winked at him. It was the sexiest thing he had ever seen her do. "Yeah, too naughty for me. You're right."

"Hey, we once even shared a gummiworm." Tony said proudly. "But still, she was my first love and I was heartbroken, when she told me she'd rather be with TJ, because he had a bicycle and was therefore cooler. I was always picked up in a limousine by our butler. Well today the joke's on her, I guess."

Pepper laughed at that and Tony realized how much he loved that sound. Somewhere in his little story his hand had slipped into hers and he noticed she hadn't shyed away like she normally would have. It made him incredibly happy. Maybe that was his cue.  
Pepper was admiring the beautiful skyline and the millions of windows that were glistening in the night like stars, as she felt Tony's eyes on her. His hand was playing with her fingers.

The 5 fingers of his hand then gripped hers tightly and tugged her forward, towards him. She could see a small smile flickering across his lips before her own eyes fluttered close in anticipation. She could feel his nose brushing hers and felt his breath on her skin, but nothing else was happening. And she realized: he was asking for permission. Permission she was more than willing to give him.

Unfortunately as Pepper leaned forward, she forgot about her champaign between them and spilled it all over herself, jerking away.

"Damn!" She cursed and involuntarily pushed him away, patting the skirt of her dress. "I'm so sorry, Tony. I'll just hurry to the restroom and freshen up a bit. I am so sorry!"

4 woman came out of the restroom, before it was finally Pepper's turn to step in. Two of the stalls were still occupied, but other than that the restroom was empty. Pepper turned on the faucet, took off her masque and sprayed some water on her face, lightly patting her cheeks.  
She heard the other two women talking to each other, but didn't pay any attention.  
As Pepper looked up and herself over in the mirror, she was astounded as to what she saw. Her features looked more relaxed and she really looked contend, almost happy. It was incredible how Tony could change her mood in just a few hours.  
She smiled at her reflection and started rummaging through her handbag, looking for her powder.  
Then one of the women said her name.

"Potts, i guess it is. The one who was his PA?"

"Yeah do you know whether she's here?" Pepper laughed to herself. Judging by their voices, they were typical brainless bimbos. Of course they wouldn't know she was now CEO, and very successful at that.

One of them flushed and Pepper quickly gathered her things, hurrying into one of the unoccupied stalls, wanting to know what they were saying about her.

Normally she didn't listen to gossip, knowing there was nothing to it, but girl talk in a bathroom and about her, come on? How could she resist?

"Yes, haven't you seen them dancing earlier?" One stepped outside and Pepper saw a flash of silver fabric.

"That was her?!" The other one asked and flushed as well. "Wow, I never knew she was such a looker." The second door opened and Pepper saw some green fabric, along with black shoes.

One of them turned on the water and Pepper couldn't hear them for a moment.

"… feel sorry for her." The one with the silver dress said.

"Why?"

"Haven't you seen the way she had been looking at him and clung to his arm? Poor girl is in love with her boss, I guess."

Was it that obvious? She hadn't figured it out herself since only two hours ago, and here was this girl, knowing and stating it just like that.

"You really think he couldn't make her happy? I think he was pretty much into it as well." The other one asked.

"Yeah maybe for the moment. But, you know… Old habits die hard, they say. He always was a playboy. Don't you think he would get bored, tied down to only one woman? I mean even if he likes her, he still flirts."

"What do you know that I don't?" The one in the green dress asked excited.

"3 words: We had a date. A few nights ago." Pepper could hear her smirk. Poor idiot, Pepper thought. Those girls always thought they could make themselves interesting by using Tony's name at one point. Still, Pepper didn't know why, but hearing this girl say it stung her a little, even though she knew how he had played his game for years. Was she really thinking she could be different. A weird feeling settled in her stomach. It was as if a dark cloud had appeared out of no where. Her small bubble of hope, that had came up tonight, suddenly was tainted.

"Actually, those are two words."

"Hannah, you know what I mean. Anyways, we met at this party a few nights ago and he asked if I wanted to come home with him."

Always the same with those poor poor girls, always so delusional with wishful thinking.

"Spill, spill, spill!" The girl named Hannah squealed.

"Well, we were drunk and I went with him to his mansion. He was upset, but didn't wanted to talk. All I knew was, he was upset because of this Pepper-woman."

"Did you see the suit?" Hannah was so excited now, her voice wavered.

"Yeah, but only briefly. I just saw it through a glass door." She sounded genuinely upset.

Pepper felt sick to her stomach. How could this girl know about his glass doors to the shop, if she hadn't really been there? Her thoughts started spinning fast.  
_Do you ever think, this is going to change? And even if he changes: Do you really think, he will be happy in the long run? It's two sides of the same medallion.  
_What ever those girls were saying was lost on Pepper, blood pounded through her ears.

Do you really think, he is ever going to change? But he did, didn't he? He had waited for her permission. Yet here this girl stood and knew exactly about he workshop. Apparently the change wasn't so consistent. And do you think he will be happy in the long run? It's two sides of the same medallion...

"… in the end nothing happened. He said he couldn't do it. Didn't give me much explanation." So that was why she hadn't had to get dry cleaning.  
"But I guess, it'll be just a question of time. You can't really tie a stud down. And if you do, it'll die. After all I came close the other night."

"I think you are right. Poor girl if she's really in love with him. She'll get her heart broken... Another round of those?" Pepper heard glass clinking and the two women left the room.

The one in the silver dress was right. Who did Pepper think she was, to try changing Tony. She knew him when he was a playboy and didn't she fell in love with this side of him?  
Yes he had changed since Afghanistan and even more so since Iron Man, but for how long. She had seen it at Rhodey's the other night. The way he had surrounded himself with women. And now she heard proof, he was almost back to his old ways. She had been mad back then, but it had just been so… him. Who was she to try and take that away from him? And the other girl was right, too. In the end she would be the one with the broken heart. Not Tony.

2 minutes later she was back up at the balcony. Tony smiled at her and opened his arms, greeting her.

"Pep, I thought you had left me." He said laughing lightly. "I don't think I could have waited any longer."

Before she knew what was happening his mouth was on hers.  
His lips moved over hers and coaxed her mouth open. She felt like he had pulled the ground from underneath her, like she was falling and soaring at the time. An army of butterflies had been set free in her stomach, and a pleasant warmth spread through her entire body.  
She didn't want to, but before she could suppress it she already felt herself kissing him back. Her hands weaving through his thick hair, pulling him in even deeper, opening her mouth to his.  
His hands started moving too, first going into her hair. She couldn't care less if he messed up her hairdo. If it was up to her, he could mess it up as badly as he wanted to. But she felt his hands dropping toward her neck, angling her head to kiss her even deeper, to pour every pent up emotion from over the last ten years into the kiss. And Pepper let him happily guide her, because she felt the same. She wanted it as much as he did.  
It felt so damn good, his lips on hers, his arms around her and she felt so, so save. And now that she knew what kissing him felt like, how could she ever survive without it?

_And how will you survive, if after 10 or 100 or 1000 of those he grows cold and distant. Or worse: bored?_ Her mind was whirring. Her consciousness was right. Those girls in the bathroom were right. This wasn't about her. Not her alone. She had to stop this now, before more damage was done. For her and more importantly for his own sake.

Pepper broke away from the kiss.

His two hands were still stoking her shoulders and arms lightly.

"I am sorry… I just had to do this" He said, out of breath, his forehead leaning against hers, eyes closed. "Hey, what's wrong?" He asked concerned when he opened them and saw her expression.

"Tony, I can't…"

"Oh here we go." He grumbled under his breath, but still smiling.

"Tony I… listen…" He had tried leaning in again and she had to virtually fight herself to not let him have his way with her. But her relentlessly logical brain made her stop. And Pepper felt her heart crack. "I can't. I told you before, I can't risk my heart like that. And even more importantly I don't want for you to change, so you can be with me."

"Pep, what are you saying?" Tony was confused and looked at her.

"Tony I know about what happened after Rhodey's party. I am not mad, I get it, but that's why we can't be together." Tears shone in her eyes and she tried desperately to keep them at bay.

Now he knew what or better who she was talking about. And he groaned. "Pepper, it's not what you think." He started, but Pepper stopped him.

"Oh it's not? Then tell me what was it?" She crossed her arms over her chest and waited for him to continue.

Tony didn't say anything, so Pepper raised her eyebrow. "Ok maybe, it was what you think. But nothing happened, I promise."

"I know nothing happened and I am not mad at you for doing it in the first place. But tell me what happens in a week or month from now. Can you promise me you won't have a fling when you are mad at me?  
I told you once before I can't risk my heart, for you to try something out. And I was right. Tonight made that painfully clear.  
I can't change you. Nor do I want to. But I can't be in a relationship with you. Not like this."

"Pepper…" His broken plea did it. Her first tear fell and she just continued staring at him. Not able to say anything. "I am so sorry." He whispered.

"That's what I am trying to say, Tony. You shouldn't feel sorry for something that seems natural for you." She couldn't stop herself and reached out to touch his face. He nuzzled her like a big cat and it ripped her heart out. "I can't, and I refuse to demand from you to change, nor do I want you to. It wouldn't be you anymore. But I can't be with you either."

"You have to say it." He needed to hear her say it was final. He needed her to go the last inch and finish him.

1 word was all she could say, it was all she could muster. "Sorry. I am sorry, Tony." As tears started falling from her eyes, she turned around. But it was enough for him.

"Yeah. I am, too." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked anywhere but at her.

"Maybe we should try and just forget tonight, Tony. Mr. Stark." She said.

"Yeah, maybe." How could he ever forget that dance, that kiss. But if that was, what she truly wanted he would give it to her. He said he'd give her anything, and he meant it. Even if that meant hurting himself beyond repair. And maybe this time loving her really meant letting her go.

"Listen, I'm gonna head home. Feel free to call Happy, if you need a ride home." He turned and went to leave.

"Tony!" Pepper turned and called after him. "I really am sorry. I… I…" She was at a loss for words and a dry sob escaped her lips, so Pepper covered her mouth with her hand, willing herself not to burst into tears. Yet.

He had to get out of there and away from her. He couldn't bear her crying, but he didn't have the urge to comfort her anymore. He had to just get away from her.  
He didn't hate her, nor was he mad. But she was right. They weren't meant for each other. Now he had to get her out of his system. Once and for all.  
The thing was his heart still had a different opinion about that.

Alex saw first Tony, then Pepper leaving. Him fast and quick, her a few minutes later wobbly on her feet and with a stone cold face, make-up a bit smeared. He excused himself from Rhodey and hurried after her.

"Pepper?"

He reached her when she had reached the first stairs.

Her legs gave away under her. All she could do was manage to not hit the ground with full force. The sobs ripping through her body were just too much for her fragile frame and she sank down to her knees, face covered in her hands, not able to hold back the flood of tears any longer. It had started so well and now she was sitting here on a red carpet in her lace gown, crying her heart out. Thankfully there weren't any reporters left.

She didn't know what had happened or why their dynamics had changed in a heartbeat. She couldn't put her finger on the moment when it had all went downhill. All she knew, what she had feared most, had eventually happened. Her heart was shattered in pieces. But she was certain, so was his… And it was her fault.

Before she knew what happened, Pepper felt strong arms lifting her from the ground.  
Alex had gathered her in his arms and sat her in his car.

As he drove her home they didn't talk. Pepper just looked out of the window, tears streaming down her face. She didn't know why everything felt so wrong. Like she had just made the biggest mistake in her life.

"Pepper? We are there." Alex spoke softly. "Shall I walk you up?"  
It was a testament to his intuition with women, that he didn't ask what had happened.

"No. I am fine." Pepper heard herself say mechanically.

"Okay, but I'll wait here until you are inside."

"Thanks." She said, as she opened the door and stepped outside.

"Pepper, if you need anything, even if it's just someone who listens, give me a call, okay?" Alex called out of the window after her.

Pepper just ignored him and went inside, tears welling up in her eyes again.

Entering her apartment, she noticed her answering machine blinked.  
It was a message from Rhodey.  
"Hey Pepper, I don't know what happened, but I wanted to let you know: Tony is on a mission."

* * *

**The first kiss. Yay? I guess... **

**Okay, I am sorry everyone. But you have been warned beforehand. This is very slow burn.  
****As you might have noticed, this chapter is inspired by Ed Sheeran - Perfect. I didn't want to spoil anything, so this is the only chapter that's not directly named like the song, it's inspired by.  
****I know I am cruel, and I know you probably have wished for something different, but like I said our two love birds are in for quite a journey. **

**If you found my countdown in this chapter, leave me a review please (:  
****If you didn't find it, leave one, too. :D**

**I hope to update by the end of the week.**


	11. Cry about angels

**Chapter 11 - Cry about angels**

**Sorry for the small delay, but I was down with summer influenza. #notcool  
****The following week I might not be able to update, because I am busy at work. But starting August I promise to be back with a brand new chapter!  
****Anyways thank you for the reviews! I am so glad you guys like it so far. 3**

**So Pepper and Tony called it quits, and it seems like it's for good. Sooo Let's see whether it stays this way.**

**Songs: Not about Angels by Birdy  
****Cry by Alexx Calise **

* * *

"Hey sweetie, here take this."

Pepper gratefully took the glass from her hands and drank a tiny sip. Lisa came around Pepper's couch and held a lemonade for herself in her hands and plopped down opposite of Pepper. "I figured you might need to refuel your water resources." Lisa said jokingly and took a sip from her lemonade.

Pepper snorted and took another sip, drawing her knees tighter to her body while resting her chin on her knees.

"Too soon?" Lisa asked worried and looked at Pepper sympathetically.

"No. Don't worry. It's fine…" Pepper sighed and drank another sip.

"Pep, I am sorry to be blunt, but you look far from fine. You really don't want to tell me what happened?" She reached for Pepper's arm, which hugged her knees and squeezed it affectionately, while smiling warmly.

Pepper sighed again. "No, not really."

"You could always cry some more." Lisa suggested and chuckled. And for the first time in days Pepper had to laugh, albeit only slightly, but still.  
Lisa really was her best friend. Her dry and dark humor and irony could lighten Pepper's darkest days, while her bluntness helped Pepper seeing the way how things truly were.

"I doubt that's possible. I cried for the last two days straight." There was a pause, in which Lisa just continued patting her arm, waiting for her to go on. "How did you know to come over, by the way?"

"Well, someone named JARVIS called my cellphone and told me he hadn't heard from or about you in a few days and was worried. And you ignored your mobile when I called, so I got worried too and drove over. Honestly for a second I was worried to find you dead in the hallway."

Roughly two hours ago Lisa had entered Pepper's apartment with her spare key. In her hallway, Pepper had greeted her with a very faint smile, red puffy eyes, and dressed in yoga pants, along with a dirty grey sweatshirt on a Thursday afternoon. Lisa had instantly known something was up and clearly wrong. Before Lisa had been able to say more than "Oh, Pep…", Pepper's smile had faded and she had broke down, not being able to hold up the facade in front of her oldest and best friend any longer. Lisa had just held her, as sobs had rippled her body and she clung to her.  
Not even when her ex-fiancé had cheated on her had Pepper been so desperate and to be honest, it worried Lisa immensely.

Yet, she hadn't been able to get much out of her. Pepper had not said much, except for it's over and something about chocolate ice cream she ate out of the container, along with about three thousand times the words "I am so stupid". However, why Pepper thought she was stupid, Lisa had yet to discover.

"JARVIS called?" Pepper asked and felt her throat tightening again. Quickly she took another sip to prevent herself from crying again. Sometimes she really loved the AI. It must have noticed, she had been avoiding Tony for the last few days, not even opening emails which so much as contained his name. Furthermore, Tony must have done the same. He must have not even mentioned her. Pepper knew she only had herself to blame, yet this realization hurt more than she'd have expected it to.  
Before she could do anything else and before she even recognized it was happening, tears started streaming down Pepper's face again.

"Oh, Honey." Lisa cooed and hugged her tightly. She whispered comforting words into her hair, telling her to let go and let it all out, while gently rocking both of them. When Pepper finally calmed again she gratefully took the handkerchief Lisa offered and blew her nose.

"Did he hurt you, Pepper?" Lisa first asked gently, but before Pepper got the chance to answer she was rambling on. "I swear to god, if he hurt you or worse… touched you, I'll march right to him and not even his suit can save him! I will kick his stupid ass to kingdom come and…" Lisa was now pacing up and down next to the couch.

"No! Lisa. Lisa!" Pepper placed her hand on Lisa's forearm and held her put. "He didn't hurt me. It was me." Pepper mumbled and looked anywhere, but at her.

"I beg you pardon? I don't understand, Pep. What was you?" Lisa asked and sank back down onto the couch again.

"He didn't hurt me. It was me. I hurt him." If the pain displayed on Pepper's face wasn't obvious already, it was clear as day in her voice. Lisa knew each word ripped through her best friend like a blade.

"What on earth happened, Pep?" Lisa breathed out and then held her breath, willing her to open up.

Pepper quickly told her about Tony picking her up and how he invited her to the dance floor.

"It truly was an amazing dance, Lish. He took the perfect lead and it felt like the world stood still for a second. Like we were the only people in the universe. The only souls that mattered." As Pepper spoke, tears welled up in her eyes again and a few fell down her face, but strangely she didn't feel like breaking down any more. "Suddenly I felt… a certainty. I knew this was it. He really is all that I wanted. I hadn't had any doubts any more. And... and... god. And just for a second I was **so** sure."

Lisa was smiling absentmindedly. She would have been so happy for her friend to finally be happy herself. Happy that she would finally be with the man of her dreams, a man she had been madly in love with for a few years, yet always too stubborn to admit it. Yes, Lisa would be happy, if she wasn't sitting here comforting Pepper, after crying for days.

"So what happened?" She asked softly, wondering when and more importantly why it had gotten so out of hand. Why they were sitting here in Pepper's living room on a Thursday afternoon surrounded by handkerchieves full of tears.

"We went outside and enjoyed the night, just talking." Pepper was now fidgeting with another handkerchief in her lap, looking down at it.

"Just talking?" Lisa raised her eyebrow and smiled wickedly as Pepper turned crimson.

"Talking and cuddling." A small shy smile appeared on Pepper's lips, reminiscing in her memories, but a sharp pain in her heart brought her back to reality and she swallowed hard. "Then I went to the bathroom and overheard two women talking…" Her voice cracked and broke. Pepper feared there was more crying to come, but apparently her tears had run dry.

"I always knew, being with Tony would come with fighting off angry, jealous and slutty women… girls. Who are throwing themselves at Tony… But for a moment I genuinely thought: he is so genuine and he had changed so, _so _much, is it really wrong to dance this line? I thought it was more than wishful thinking, that crossing the line for good was really an option…"

"Pepper, what did he do when you returned?" Lisa asked wearily, not quite ready to hear what she feared Pepper was about to say.

What she certainly didn't expect was Pepper's response. Pepper smiled sadly and involuntarily closed her eyes.  
"He kissed me."

"Oh, I knew he was with another slu… Wait a minute! He… He… What?!" Lisa gaped and looked at Pepper wide eyed.

"He kissed me. Like his life depended on it."

"What was it like?" Lisa tried to stop herself from asking, but she couldn't. Now she knew someone who had been kissed by Tony Stark, and it looked like it wasn't out of pure lust either, but - it seemed like - love. And she was curious.

"It really was breathtaking, earth shattering. It was everything I ever dreamed of and more. I felt like the air was knocked out of my lungs and he filled them with live's breath at the same time. I don't doubt he really was serious the entire time…"

"But what on earth went wrong, Pep? Up until then, it looks like you were finally living the dream. Your dream."

"I know, Lish. But I couldn't do it. We just don't…" Pepper's voice cracked again, "fit."

"But why? You seemed so sure."

"I guess I realized we're from different worlds. He's a playboy, sooner or later I'll just bore him. He is a womanizer. And I guess he always will be…" Another tear rolled down her cheek, silently making its way to her chin.

"So you fear he will cheat on you, sooner or later?" Lisa asked softly, reaching out to touch her shoulder gently.

"No… I know he wouldn't." And Pepper really did.

"I don't…"

"Lisa, he had the chance to do it." Pepper pleaded with her, hoping she would understand her. "After Rhodey's Party he took home another woman. But he sent her home before anything happened between them. As far as I know he hadn't even kissed her." After saying it, more tears streamed down her face. It hurt more than she had even imagined.

"I still don't see how this is a bad thing? I mean we're talking about Tony Stark, I'm sure that's a first for him to turn down a woman willing to sleep with him." Given his playboy past, turning down women he already had in bed really seemed like a big step for Tony Stark.

"It is. Even more so since he was mad. And a little drunk. But he surrounded himself with women after I turned him down. It's kind of his refuge. Always have and always will be. And I don't know, if I could manage this behavior when being in a relationship with him."

"But you're not afraid of him cheating on you?" Pepper just didn't make sense. "I'm sorry I still don't get it."

"He wouldn't cheat on . He's too proud for that. Too stubborn to lose. He wants to proof he can be a good guy. And Tony truly is, but in other aspects. He is kind, and caring, and philanthropic. He really is a hero and I know he is trying to do better, for me.  
I know by heart Tony would do any- and everything to make me happy. He would go out of his way to make sure I have everything I could ever ask for, and probably more. But at what cost, Lisa?" Tears were back in her eyes again, but her voice was strong, yet full of pain.  
"He would make sure I am happy at the expense of his own happiness. He would betray his true character to be someone he just isn't. And who am I to not avert this misfortune from him? I just can't require him to change for me…"

Lisa simply stated, finally understanding why she had turned him down, feeling her friends pain. "You truly are in love with him."

"Lisa, if I really loved him, I would accept him for the man he truly is, as well as his polygamous tendencies. But I can't… I know I wouldn't survive it. Tony knows that, too. And he is trying so hard to change that. For me. But I can't let him change himself this much. He would become someone he isn't at heart. And I can't let that happen… So I am not good for him. I can not let him kill himself to let myself fly."

"Pep, now you are getting melodramatic."

"I know. That's the two and a half seasons Downton Abby I binge watched before you came over…" They both laughed, albeit Pepper's laugh was a bit snooty and still teary eyed. "But I am serious, though. I want to be with him, with every fibre of my being, but in the long run he wouldn't be happy and neither would I."

"I think you're making the right decision. Don't get me wrong, I believe he loves you, really loves you. But I disagree in one point, though. I believe, no I know you really love him, too. And that's why you let him go. You put his happiness above yours. Pep, that is the _one_ definition of love." Lisa smiled sadly at her. It just seemed so unfair: Two souls who had danced around each other for over a decade, finally being brave enough to become one and yet they weren't fit to be together. They were perfect for each other, just not at the right time. They had found something that could have been incredible, but it was just out of touch for them. And it was breaking Pepper's heart, yet Lisa couldn't do anything to help her. If she could, she would have taken all the pain away from her.

"I guess you're right." Pepper said and sniffled a bit, wiping away tears. "I do… I do love him. But that's why I had to finally let him go. We are not good for each other. I mean…" Her voice fails her again, but no more tears came.

"I know sweetie. It's so unfair." The two of them just sat in silence for a while, Pepper staring blankly into the void and Lisa looking at her friend trying to figure out what to do now.

"Where do we go from here, Pepper? What do you wanna do, now? I mean you two are working together, but…" She was at a loss for words. It seemed heartless to suggest Pepper should quit the job she loved more than anything in the world.

"I don't know, Lish. I guess all I can do is try to separate myself from Tony. To make it easier on him. Apart from work related things and Iron Man missions I'll stay clear of his path."

"And how do you plan to make yourself stop?" Pepper knew Lisa was referring to her feelings for him. AFter all she had just now - finally - admitted she was in love with him.

"Honestly, Lisa… I wish I knew. I just don't…" Before Pepper could finish her sentence her phone beeped, indicating she had a new message.

**Hey, Pep. How ya doin? Alex was asking if u r alright. Worried after he brought u home. I worry 2. Text me. -R**

Pepper hadn't talked to Rhodey, since the ball either and she didn't know if Tony had talked to him since then, knowing about the fiasco.

"Who's Alex?" Lisa asked, looking over Pepper's shoulder.

"This guy I met at Rhodey's party. He brought me home after my… after I talked to Tony at the gala. Found me crying…"

"Is he nice? Is he hot?" Lisa asked suggestively.

"Lisa!" Pepper scolded her. "Seriously? I'm sitting here heartbroken and you - a married woman - is asking about whether the guy is hot?" Pepper was only half joking, but she knew her oldest friend and wasn't really mad. And she answered as Lisa continued to stare at her expectantly. "Yes, he is nice and good looking." Pepper grumbled under her breath.

"Maybe you should go out with him. Just to take your head off things with Mr. Iron Man." Lisa shrugged.

"Yeah maybe. Let me think about it." But to be honest, Pepper had enough for now. She didn't want to go out dating, when her heart was still set on and broken over Tony. First she had to get over him without the help of dates.

"So, about Downton Abby. I have my jammies with me, I took tomorrow off, I'm down for binging season three. Do you have wine somewhere?" Lisa asked and ventured off into the kitchen looking for a bottle and two glasses.

And Pepper knew, she didn't need dates to take her head off Iron Man. She just needed her best friend, who was always there for her.

* * *

**So the next chapter will be up in the beginning of August.  
If you leave me a review, I'll promise to be extra quick (:**


	12. Fairytale gone Bad

**Chapter 12: Fairytale gone bad**

**Hello fellow Pepperony-Lovers.  
****Thanks for all your kind reviews 3  
****I am sorry it took me so long, but man live is crazy at the moment.  
****I don't want to spoil this chapter, so without further ado, let's get into this.**

**Warning: Slight Endgame and IW spoiler. (This is going to hurt. Bad. And I am very sawy o.o)  
****Warning: Swear words.**

**Song: Fairytale gone bad by Sunrise Avenue**

* * *

**Fairytale gone bad**

Tony or better JARVIS had called Pepper at five in the morning, telling her he had returned from another mission and was fine. Since then she hadn't heard anything from him directly for a few days.

Only JARVIS and Rhodey had informed her that he was taking mission after mission from Nick Fury. And when he wasn't flying around the world, he would be hiding himself in the workshop.

Pepper tried to reach him several times over the week, but he ignored her.  
She knew he was hurt and she knew it was his way of coping with hurt feelings and stress, but she still worried about him. Just because she had told him no again, didn't mean she did not care for him any more at all.  
But Pepper didn't know what she should do to make him believe.

"Hey Jimmy." She answered the phone in an unnerved tone, while looking over her notes for the budget meeting she knew Tony wouldn't attend today.

"Hey Pepper. Listen I hate to do that to you, but…" Rhodey trailed off not knowing how to break the news to her.

"What Rhodey, what is it?" His voice and the slight quiver she could hear there frightened her.

"We have no contact to him. We've been trying for hours, we can't reach or find him. Hadn't been Abel to for the last 16 hours. Neither via radio, nor through radar." He sight, while Pepper closed her eyes, breathing slowly through her nose, bracing herself. "We have no idea where he is. And SHIELD doesn't know either."

When Pepper didn't answer Rhodey was immediately concerned about her. He knew how bad she had been, when Tony had been missing the first time. He couldn't even imagine how it must be for her now, receiving those news yet again.  
"Pepper?" He asked softly and heard her sharp intake.

"No, Rhodey. No… Please, don't tell me he's gone missing again." Pepper gasped and her pencil fell out of her hand. She felt panic constricting her chest and had trouble breathing.

"Pepper, calm down, okay? He's not exactly missing just yet… He went on a mission yesterday and we lost contact to him. He's not on our or SHIELD's radars anymore. There are already people out there looking for him. Don't worry, though. There was very bad satellite connection from the beginning. I am sure he's fine." Rhodey tried to sound reassuring, but Pepper didn't fail to notice, his voice sounded a bit strained. 16 hours no contact at all meant he was missing. There was no sugarcoating it and Pepper knew that.

"Keep me in the loop please, Jim." Pepper requested and hung up after he reassured her. She wasn't able to say much more, the break down already overpowering her.

That was it. He was gone again. And she had blew it. She was a chicken, afraid of her own feelings and afraid of his. She had done what she had sworn herself would never happen again. Apparently he was the one that got away. But in the worst way.  
She felt sick to her stomach. She felt like she was about to puke, but on the other hand like all feelings had left her body. She felt weak and numb at the same time, except for a tiny part in her left chest. That bit hurt. It hurt like hell. It burned like hell fire had been ignited in there, eating her alive from the inside out.  
Before Pepper knew it, droplets fell onto her notepad, blurring the ink. The panic, which had slowly started to rise in her chest, now consumed her entirely.  
The three month he had been missing had been the worst time of her life. She had been a shadow of herself in this time, barely alive, but too stubborn to die. Although she had wished many times to just fade into nothingness. She wasn't sure she would survive something like that again. Maybe she wouldn't actually die, but she knew, she sure as hell would stop living.

Before she knew it she was on the floor, her back against her desk, bawling her eyes out, sobbing. It was more than half an hour later that she managed to regain at least a bit of composure.

_Ok Pepper get a grip. Tony is alright. Except… what if he isn't? He doesn't know I regret declining his offer. Stop that Pepper! He's not missing just yet, Rhodey said. It's been just 16 hours… He is alright. Except maybe he isn't… _

As her phone rang again she didn't even look at the caller ID. "Jimmy, please tell me you have good news."

"Um, hi Pepper. Is everything okay?" She heard Alex worried voice over the phone.

"Oh, hi Alex." She said somewhat resigned. They hadn't had any contact since the night he had drove her home. Pepper had been too busy working and worrying about her big headed idiot of an ex-boss. And to be honest, she had forgotten about him.

"Listen Pepper, if this is a bad time I can call you back later." Now Alex was the one who sounded disappointed. Pepper really wanted to tell him he should call back some other time, but he had been very nice to her the other night and she felt like she'd owe him.

"No it's fine. How can I help you?" She asked, but only half listening.

"Look, I don't really know how to do this…" He laughed nervously and Pepper knew what was coming, but before she could stop him, her had already said it. "I really enjoyed talking to you at Rhodey's party and the other night at the benefit, and I wanted to ask, whether you'd like to get coffee sometimes or go to dinner with me?"

"Uhm…" She hated turning men down, and it wasn't that she didn't like Alex or that she didn't find him attractive, he was, but with Tony gone again and her own unresolved feelings, she felt like it wasn't fair dragging him into the middle of her personal emotional rollercoaster. "Listen Alex, I really like you -"

On the other side of the line Alex huffed. "Here it comes… the but… I get it, Pepper. See you around, I guess." He sounded disappointed, but not mad.

"Wait, Alex." She managed to say, before he hung up on her. "Please let me explain. I really appreciated you driving me home the other night and I owe you for that. Big time. But Rhodey and I have a situation here at the moment with Tony, and I have to focus on that, for the moment." That technically wasn't a lie. "I just don't have the mind for a date right know. I am very sorry. If the timing was better I'd love to grab a coffee, but right now I can't afford to focus on anything else. I am sorry."

"Yeah I understand. Excuse me for bothering you. See ya around, Pepper." He sounded genuinely upset.

"Wait, Alex…" But this time he had already hung up.

After her call with Alex, Pepper cancelled all meeting for the day and headed to Tony's. Just like she had done when he went missing the first time.  
After she let herself in she heard music coming from the shop, which was odd, since Tony wasn't at home. But she also noticed JARVIS was down, since he didn't greet her like he normally would when she entered the house.  
Cautiously she went down the stairs toward his workshop. She didn't know what she felt first, relief or burning rage. Tony lay under one of his cars, a few scotch bottles scattered across the floor, music blasting form the speakers.  
Since JARVIS was off, she had to turn down his music manually. She was so enraged, Pepper actually yanked the cord right out of the socked.

"Are you out of you mind?!" She screamed from the top of her lungs. "Everyone is out there looking for you, thinking you have gone missing. **AGAIN.** And you are lying here, tinkering with one of your stupid FUCKING cars, with JARVIS off and drinking your head off?"

Tony, startled by her sudden appearance and the volume in her voice and knocked his head on the car he was lying under.  
"Ow. Hi to you too, Miss twisty pants." He grumbled. Pepper had seen Tony drunk many many times and she knew he was still sober enough to register what she was saying and he would remember the next morning.

"Why on earth would you do that to us, Tony?" Pepper asked disbelievingly, still screaming at him in rage. "You had us worried sick. FOR _HOURS!_"

"Who worried about me? You or Rhodey?" He asked looking at her from where he was still sitting on the floor.

"Both of us of course." The question threw her off at first and she went quiet. But then she realized: This was about her. And the night at the benefit and her turning him down. "Tony, you didn't honestly think I wouldn't care, did you?"

"Honestly Potts, I don't know what to think anymore. One day you are hot, the other you are cold. Now you are yes, later no. One day you're in, the other out. Wait that's a Katy Perry song." He furrowed his eyebrows and thought about his words for a second. "Yep… Katy Perry. It's still true, tough." He shrugged shortly. As his gaze returned to her he remembered what he wanted to say and looked angrily at her, clapping his hands with each word, as to spur her on. "Make. Up. Your. Mind."

"Are you kidding me, Tony?!" Pepper growled now dangerously. "You had us all worried sick, to get a reaction out of me?" She was dumbfounded. She couldn't believe it. Couldn't believe him.

"Ehhhr… yes." And now he had the nerve to look proud of himself. "I thought if you were worried sick you might realize that you truly want me."

That really left her speechless, her mouth hanging open, looking at him disbelievingly. As he waited and the silence stretched between the two of them, Tony gathered on of the bottles, swirled the amber liquor and brought it to his mouth, while never breaking eye contact.  
His nonchalant, drunk behavior had Pepper fuming and she finally found her voice again.

"You want a reaction? You want a final answer?" While saying the words the regret she had felt a few hours ago for not acting on her feelings came back, flooding her mind. A few hours ago she had been certain, when he returned she would finally grant his - and to be honest: her - wish and take the leap of faith, take him on the whole relationship thing. This time she had been keen on keeping her promise to herself, that she never wanted to miss out on being with him, ever again.  
But then she had come here. And he had done this: He crushed all her hopes and proofed he was every inch the asshole she always suspected he was. And her rage… No it wasn't rage she felt, it was pain. Physical pain. It cleared things up for her and the wall was back up, stronger than it had ever been before.

"The truth would be nice for once." He stated looking at her challenging.

"You want the truth?" And Pepper let go and spoke just that.

"Tony, I will always worry about you. I will never sleep well, while you are out there doing your thing, knowing you might never come back. If you ever go missing again, I don't know if I'd survive that. Maybe you were right. I am wildly conflicted. I am proud of the man you are trying to be and I see your noble reasons for doing what you are doing, yet I am oh so worried when you are out there." She chuckled bleakly, remembering his words from the conference.  
And then that night came back to her mind, and she slightly shook her head. She had to get it all out, or she would never be able to move on, her resolve was already crumbling, tears stinging in her eyes again. "There is no denying we have chemistry, I think we proofed that at the ball." She smiled. Tony however fails to notice that it quite didn't reach her eyes, and it was sad. He just smiled and started walking towards her with open arms, apparently expecting her to step into them.  
But before he could reach her she put her hand on his chest, keeping him away. He looked confused for a second, but then his expression changed and he got it. "But I will never be your girlfriend. What you did today, faking that you are missing again… I don't think I can forgive you for that." She paused, closing her eyes for a second, trying to swallow the pure poison coming out of her moth.

"It shows me we made the right decision the other night." Her hand fell from his chest and both her arms sneaked around her body as to protect herself from him… or from falling apart yet again.

"Leaving our relationship the way it is."  
The next word felt like razor blades coming through her throat. "Colleagues."

Colleagues? She wasn't even sure she could be friends with him after this. She was so hurt and disappointed.

"Pepper, I just wanted you to realize… I wanted you to see, that you feel the same like I do." He was pleading with her.

Pepper laughed quietly, bitterly. Not at him, but at the irony. Two hours ago she would have done everything to have him back safely. And now she had to explain, why they just didn't fit. Why she would never be with him. She was breaking her and his heart all over again.  
She realized, she wasn't even mad at him. No she was hurt. He had hurt her beyond repair. Pepper knew it had been an act of desperation, but if this was the length he was willing to go… It frightened her. She didn't want to imagine what else he would do to get what he was after. And she needed to stop that now, once and for all, before someone got physically hurt.  
Her voice was calm now and steady, like she was explaining something to a little child. And she knew she would never not care for him. That's why she had to make sure he was ok, but he also needed to understand.

"What do you feel, Tony? Because it's certainly not love. You don't do something like this to people you love. You don't hurt them on purpose, to get what you want. I don't doubt that you like me. And I won't deny that I like you. But we need to stop pretending there is more to it. We need to stop pretending this is something it isn't. Please be careful, when you go on another mission. And I hope you'll let me know when you are going.

But I think, for a while it'll be easier when we don't see each other. At least outside of Stark Industries."  
She went to leave, Tony standing there speechless.  
"Oh, please call Rhodey and SHIELD. They're still looking for you."

* * *

The next day Pepper received a big bouquet of flowers and a card reading: _I can't believe I have been such an idiot. -T_

The day after Pepper got another bouquet and the card reading: _Please don't hate me. -T_

On the third day - red roses _and _chocolate - Pepper was still not responding it read: _I am sorry. _

Pepper on the other hand was still so hurt, that he had scared her like this, she took all three bouquets and threw them in the trash.  
But hurt wasn't her only motive. She needed to get him out of her head. Problem was he was in her head all day long. And in her subconsciousness all night long. The nightmares returned. Leaving her screaming, crying and waking up in sweat. He either left her alone, to go with a faceless blonde or he was dangling from his company roof, glass shattering around him, his arc losing its glow. Sometimes it was him laying in the dessert, dead.

But there were new nightmares in her catalog: He left the tarmac, but before he reached her, the scene change to a reddish background. Tony was older and in his suit, which was I pieces and suddenly he would just vanished into dust, blown away in the wind.  
Sometimes he was standing in front of her, blue lines creeping up his neck, reaching his face while his arc stopped working.

However this was nothing compared the one she had had the night of his third apology. It was the worst one, which didn't just left her screaming or crying.  
She dreamt she was fighting along side him, until he wasn't. He was lying on the ground, the right side of his face and body severely scarred, a female AI-voice informing her life was running out of him, while she told him he could rest now, they were going to be ok and kissing him good bye.  
This particular one left her with a panic attack at 3 in the morning, clutching the rim of her bathtub and panting heavily, while she desperately tried to not throw up.

Those dreams were new and she didn't know where they'd come from.

So at daytime Pepper busied herself with thinking about how she could stop thinking about him and at night he also came to her, but never to stay. She needed to get him out of head, her mind, her bed and the apologies and flowers weren't helping.

On day four Tony actually showed up in her office. She didn't know whether he saw the flowers in her trash can, but she didn't care. He needed to get over her as well.  
"Pepper, you there?" Tony asked after he knocked at her door and still entered without asking for permission. "Listen, I want to apologize again." He said popping his head inside her office.

Pepper on the other hand just wanted to get him out of her office as fast as possible. For his and for her sake. They needed to get each other out of their systems.  
"Tony, I thought we were on the same page about not seeing each other outside of work anymore." She sight, but she still waved at him to come in.

"I know, but you never responded and this _is_ work." He smirked one of his Tony Stark smiles at her. One of those that wasn't genuine. And she knew he was masking his pain.

It pained her breaking his heart, and she hated herself for doing it. But the last two weeks had been proof they wouldn't work. Still the throbbing pain in her chest and sinking feeling of her heart were very present.  
"Ok Tony. Thank you for your apologies, I appreciate them." It wasn't a total lie, she appreciated that he tried to apologize, something he did very rarely. Yet she couldn't forgive him so easy and honestly she wasn't sure if she ever could. "I am not mad anymore. Promise. Now go back to work, please." She smiled a him, but she knew it didn't reach her eyes.

Tony was already halfway back through the door and had nearly closed it when he spoke again, not turning to face her.  
"You are not going changing your mind, do you?" He asked hopefully.

"Tony…" Pepper sight. She really didn't want to go through this again. "I believe we said everything there is to say."

It was then that he turned, on hand still on the door handle. He looked really sad.

"Tell me what I should do, Pepper. You are everywhere. In my house, my office… my head." Her admitted quietly, but she still heard it. "Tell me, what do I have to do to make myself stop?"

Pepper took another deep breath. Her heart broke at the sight of him. He was sad and in pain. And now he was asking _her_ how he could manage to get over _her_. She felt like someone had just ripped her heart out and danced on the pieces.

"I don't know, Tony. I don't know."

* * *

**Two days later:**

Maybe Lisa had been right. Maybe she needed to take her head off Tony.

**What u doin tomorrow night? Pick me up at 8? I'm in for some Italian food! -P**

**Sounds great! I know the perfect location. I'll be there (: -Alex **

Just as Pepper entered Alex's car, her phone buzzed again:

**I'm off to a mission. NYC. Explosion in building. -T**

* * *

**The next few chapters are going to be a little lighter. **

**Also someone asked how many chapters this is going to be, and I don't want to tell you how many I have planned, because I don't want to ruin the thrill of never knowing when they finally collide.  
****Am I Evil? Yes. But I hope you will continue following this story either way. **

**If more people want to know how many chapters I have planned and already drafted, let me know in the reviews and maybe I will answer the question with the next chapter.**

**Love (:**


	13. Supreme

**Chapter 13: Supreme**

**Phew… It's been a while. I know, I know shame on me, but it has been a bit stressful. Still, I pulled all strings to be able to put this chapter out, before I go on vacation (I need it so bad!) tomorrow. So there might be a few mistakes in here. I am sorry. Unfortunately that also means,**** I won't update until October. Hopefully I'll have more time then to update more frequently. **

**Thanks again for all the reviews, I love and appreciate every single one of them!**

**Also I will take a slightly different take on this chapter. I am trying to tell two different scenes at the same time: I hope it works out.**

**Warning: mentioning of attempted rape!**

**Song: Supreme by Robbie Williams**

* * *

**Supreme**

"Do you have to leave?" Alex asked softly as he saw Pepper's worried look at her phone.

"No it's just Tony. He's heading out to New York for a mission. Apparently there was a bomb or something in a building. Do you mind if we just turn on the radio, to see if there are some news about this?" Pepper asked and reached for the controller at the headboard.

"Pepper, if you want to reschedule, it's fine. We'll find another evening." Alex said and was about to open his door. He already had one hand at the handle when he felt Pepper's hand on his other forearm stopping him.

"Alex. No, I really want to go out with you tonight. It's just… I want to know what happened in New York. What we are dealing with. There is nothing I can do about the situation. It is how it is, right now. I just want to be informed. Let's find out what happened and we'll be on our way, okay?" She looked at him with big blue eyes and a warm smile that made him melt inside.

Pepper on the other hand was worried sick, but she couldn't let it show. She needed to stop worrying about him so much. Besides it was true, Tony was out of town, helping others. She could do nothing to help, so she might as well get through with this date. She just needed to know in how much danger Tony was and what they - No: He. There wasn't a they anymore - what he was dealing with. She could always find an excuse after she got all her information.

* * *

"Sir, there was an explosion in the northern side of the Woolworth-Building. There are 6 casualties so far and 42 severely injured, along with 89 people trapped on the upper floors. Also floors 23 trough 29 are unusable, so help can't come through at the moment. There is a fire as well on floor 29 which is spreading rapidly, endangering people in the upper floors even more." JARVIS suddenly announced, while Tony was working on a new suite, which could detect special bracelets and assemble itself around them.

"J, let Pepper know I'm going to New York, and have my suit ready in 5. I'm going to change into the neoprene. Give me further details about the incident." Tony instructed. This was a perfect opportunity to repay the City of New York for the Hammer-incident a few month ago. It also was a perfect opportunity to clear his head from the ever pressing matter, which had Pepper's name and face printed all over it. It also gave him an excuse to test the updated suit and explore the full potential of the new reactor.

"It looks like a self-made bomb went off on the 29th floor. It damaged the surrounding floors badly. Yet building structure indicates, there is no need to worry about the possibility of collapsing. However the fire seems to be spreading upward endangering the people on the upper floors. They are basically trapped, Sir."

"Any hints at more bombs?" Tony asked while stepping on the assembling platform.

"No. It looks like it was a single bomb. The floor where it detonated and the ones surrounding it were nearly empty. The company and stuff occupying those floors just moved to another building two days ago."

"Maybe a goodbye-present?" Tony asked. "Look into the company records, J and keep me posted."

* * *

The media only knew about an explosion in the Woolworth-Building, but not about its cause and reported merely about a tragic incident. The fire department seemed to be having difficulties with getting a fire on the upper floor under control, because they couldn't get up there. That was until Iron Man showed up and started getting people down and to safety one by one.

Pepper's nerves, now calmed allowed her to actually look forward to her evening with Alex.

The place he took her to - Italian like she had requested - was a tiny little bistro which had anything but pizza and pasta. Pepper loved it.

"So what was up with you and your boss the other day, when I called?" Alex asked lightheartedly, smiling at her, having no clue about the delicacy of the topic.

"Um, it was Iron Man related and there was a misunderstanding. Didn't Jimmy tell you about it?" Pepper answered, fiddling awkwardly wit her tap water in front of her.

"No, we work in different departments. I have nothing to do with Iron Man affairs, actually. I am more into organizing and coordinating our troops and planing operations." Alex said as a waiter approached their table and set down some ciabatta, olive oil and coarse sea salt. He took the basked and held it out to Pepper. "You need to try the bread. You won't get anything better outside Italy."

"Thank you, Alex. And thank you for taking me out tonight. I am really sorry about the other day." Pepper took slice and dipped it into the oil, sprinkling it with salt. "Mhmm. Wow this is delicious." The bread really was heavenly, it was crunchy on the outside and fluffy and mellow on the inside. It had the perfect consistency. And the taste was extraordinary. The bread was neither salty, nor sweet, yet it tasted faintly of tomatoes and olives with a hint of thyme.

"It's good isn't it?" Alex asked and grabbed a slice himself.

"It is. How do you know this place?" She asked, really interested. It wasn't hard to find good restaurants in LA, but it was hard to find extraordinary little gems like this one.

"Funny story, in 10th grade I went to Italy for an exchange year and my guest family came to LA to visit me and my family after I graduated. Daniele, the father had thought about moving to the US for quite some time already and he found this little space here, while walking through down town. My father was an immigration lawyer back in the days, before he retired and he helped them get the paperwork done and arranged everything around the green cards and stuff. Roughly 20 years later this gem is still one of the best Italian restaurants in town. A real insider tip."

The waiter brought over the menu, along with a bottle of red wine and posted out tonights special. Before he could return to the front of the bistro however, Pepper stopped him and turned toward Alex.

"You should let the family know you're here, Alex."  
She turned toward the waiter and spoke to him now. "Could you please tell the owner…"

"Pepper, that's really not necessary." He turned to the waiter as well. "Sir, it is alright."  
After he was gone Pepper took a sip and looked expectingly over at Alex.  
"You know how Italien families are. If Daniele finds out I am here we won't be alone for the rest of the evening. And we would probably end up drunk, because he will make us taste all the wines." Alex laughed, but Pepper saw there was more to it than he let show.

* * *

Tony arrived in New York 45 minutes later, while JARVIS gave him updates about the companies and the explosion.  
Apparently the company that had moved was clean, except for a few DUA's committed by the CFO and a few minor tax violations.

At the moment it looked like the bomb had been planted by a former employee, who had been fired a few weeks ago. He had been caught transferring cash back, which had been meant for the company into his private accounts, although he was fairly loaded himself. But it seemed he had a rather unpredictable personality and a slight aggression problem, which led him to building a bomb and planting it inside the building as an act of revenge.

There were firefighters and trucks, paramedics and police officers everywhere. The blocks, streets and skyscrapers around the building were on complete lockdown by now and JARVIS informed Tony a team from the FDNY had already made it up to the 26th floor.

"Sir, it still seems like they won't be able to put out the fire in time. It's spreading tremendously fast and people are not able to get down." An analysis appeared in his heads up display, showing the blocked passages.

"Can we remove the obstacles in any way?" Tony asked JARVIS, still hovering in the air.

"I'm afraid not, Sir. The fire and especially the poisonous fumes are blocking all passages." The AI replied.

"Ok, J. Change of plans. Show me the upper floors, which are still save."

"Sir, it will only be temp…" JARVIS tried to intersect.

"J, which floor?" Tony insisted.

"Everything above floor 41 should be save of poisonous fumes. For now. But I have to remind you Sir,…"

"Thanks, J." Tony muted him successfully.

He flew up to the first floor he could see people in and amplified his voice, hovering in the air.

"Ok. Hi everyone. Please take everyone you can find and who can walk and move without help higher up than the 41st floor. Do not try to get down. The way is blocked! Please only people who can walk and move on their own! I will first get the injured out. Please help each other, but first make sure you are save." Tony went to get down and fly some paramedics and firefighters up to help the crowd. As he moved towards the ground he saw the people on the floors looked wide eyed at him, standing still. He turned back towards them.  
"There is a fire in this building! MOVE!" He practically screamed at them and they finally started moving. "Dipshits." He mumbled.

"You and you," He pointed at a paramedic and a firefighter. "Get a team together. 5 people. I am getting you and some equipment up there. We need triage." Tony grabbed triage cards and threw them at one of the paramedics. "Red, people who need to get down immediately. I'll bring them down first. Yellow, people not able to get to safety fast enough. Everything above floor 41 is save for now. Green… We don't need green. Everybody else is green. Got it?" The two men looked astounded at him, but nodded. "Good. Go! Don't waste time."

"J, where is the chief of operations?" Tony asked JARVIS.

"If you mean the chief of operations of the firefighter department, Sir, it's Mr. Phillipps. Approximately 45 feet to your left."

Tony saw the man JARVIS was referring to, and went over to him.  
He asked whether there were any possibilities to get water or some other extinguishers up into the building to stop the fire, but it looked like it was too massive to make that happen. Even with the help of Iron Man.

The one firefighter returned and told Tony the team was ready.

"Good…" He saw the two silver lyle guns. "What are you?"

"I am a fire-…" The other man started.

"No, I mean your rank." Tony said annoyed.

"Oh, I am a Captain, Sir." Tony noticed he looked very proud, despite the situation.

"Good work, Captain." Tony finished his sentence as they walked over to the group. 3 firefighters, 2 paramedics. "You all need gas masks. Good, you got them." They held them up and Tony nodded. "What else? Where is the equipment?" The people pointed behind them, where a small pile of medical equipment, along with a foldable stretcher and a few fire extinguisher lay.

"Great. Here is the plan. I take you," Tony pointed at the smallest paramedic, "and most of the equipment and fly you up to the 41st floor. For now it's save there. You take the stairs down to the 34th-"

"I would highly recommend to not use the 34th floor anymore, Sir. At least not, when they should help others." JARVIS intercepted.

"- the 35th floor," Tony corrected. "You'll meet the rest of the team there. Start triage from there up! You need to get everyone as high up as possible. 41st floor at least. The higher the better." Everyone nodded. "Good. Let's do it. Oh and if you puke on me, I'll let you fall." The group chuckled.

"Shall I take as much equipment as I can?" The smallest paramedic asked, and it was just now that Tony realized she was a woman.

"Holy! You're a girl." Tony was astounded.

"And now I'm not fit for the mission any more?" She asked challenging.

"Uhm… No? I… I mean yes. Of course you are, but you know it's dangerous, don't you?" Tony asked, and wanted to kick himself. That sounded terrible.

"Yeah, we all know." She challenged him again. "Can we go now?"

"Sure." Tony answered, not wanting to make it worse. "Take as much as you can, but don't overload. You won't be stable."

As they were all set and packed, Tony took hold of her and flew off.

* * *

After Pepper and Alex finished their dinner, they each enjoyed an espresso - decaf for Pepper _I like sleep, thank you very much_ \- and shared the most delicious tiramisu.

"Alex, this evening had been great..." Pepper smiled and squeezed his hand over the table.

"Has it been so bad, you are already saying good bye, though we haven't even paid?" Alex asked a little shocked.

"No. No! That's not what I meant, at all." Pepper laughed. It had been a beautiful evening, but the incident with their waiter hadn't left Pepper's mind yet.

"I just wanted to say, we had a wonderful evening so far. Just the two of us. But don't you think we could afford a bit Italian family friendliness at the moment?"

"No. Let's just get the cheque and get out of here." Alex said somewhat defensively, making it clear this part of the conversation was over.  
They finished their coffee, joking and laughing again and eventually Alex waved the waiter down, payed and the two of them went to the parking lot. It was a bit chilly outside, but not entirely unpleasant. She pulled her scarf tighter around her shoulders and was thankful she chose casual jeans instead of a skirt.  
Before she entered the car, Pepper decided to be blunt.

"Alex, what are you not telling me?" She stopped and looked at him, observing his reaction.

"What are you talking about, Pepper?" He smiled and looked wonderingly at her.

"You told me about the family and your time with them, but you refuse to meet him." Upon hearing that Alex fell silent. "What are you not telling me, Alex? You are avoiding the issue."

"You won't let it go, will you?" He asked with a sigh.

Pepper sighed too in return. But then she smiled. "I don't want to push you, if you're not ready to tell me. But I want you to know, you can tell me everything. I am here to listen, not to judge." Her warm smile did the trick, and he leaned against his car with his back, as Pepper leaned her side against the backdoor.

"Alright. Daniele had two kids. A son, Michelle who was my exchange buddy. We were very good friends, especially after they moved to the US. And Daniele had a daughter, Maria. She was two years younger than me and Michelle."

"Was?" Pepper asked carefully. "So she is…" She didn't want to finish the sentence.

"She died. No. She was killed. And it was my fault." Alex said and rubbed his face and raked his hands through his hair.

"What happened?" Pepper asked softly.

"Picture perfect story." Alex laughed sarcastically. "We fell in love, we started dating, I proposed eventually, she accepted. One night we drove around town, I lived in the suburbs back then, but she and her family had a lot of dept. Coming here and starting a business wasn't cheap. So they lived in a bad neighborhood. I drove her home. When I walked her to their door a bunch of Italian guys started harassing us. I am blond, not dark haired so I was kind of an outsider in this neighborhood. They started calling her names and insult her for being with a white bread like me. Eventually they also started shoving me and grabbing her. The leader told her she just needed a real Italian man to fuck some sense into her… Everything afterwards happened so fast… I shoved the guys holding me back and grabbed Maria, trying to protect her. The next thing I know is a loud bang and her blood everywhere, the guys running in each and every direction. Daniele and Michelle came running out and found her lying in my arms, blood leaking from her stomach. I joined the army the day after he funeral. I couldn't live with myself, can't live with myself… I couldn't protect her. And I am sure Daniele wouldn't want to see me. But I come here every now and then to make sure they are doing alright."

Pepper had tears in her eyes but didn't want to interrupt him. He had told her at his own will and Pepper was willing to give him all the time he needed. His story really had touched her.

"You must think I am pathetic… Taking my date to my deads fiancees father." Alex said and looked at the pavement sadly.

"I don't think you are pathetic, at all, Alex." Pepper tried catching is eyes. She wanted to comfort him. "But you are not responsible for her death. You tried to protect her and I am sure Daniele knows it. You did the right thing. It was an accident. A tragic accident, Alex. You couldn't have done anything differently. If… If you want to, I'd love to go and see Daniele with you. I bet he'd love seeing you're doing okay."

"No, Pepper. Not tonight. Tonight is our first date. Please let's not dwell on this tonight. But thank you for listening. Apart from Rhodey you are the only one who knows." He leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss on her cheek.  
"Puh that really was deep talk for a first date, I am sorry."

"Don't be, Alex. I asked you to tell me." He moved to go to the driver side and get it, but Pepper didn't move, awkwardly shuffling her feet. "Why… uhm… I don't want to go home yet. Why don't we take a walk? Maybe some more lighthearted topics come our way." She laughed nervously. Alex found her endearing. "I mean maybe a walk will lift our moot? But if you want to go home I totally understand. It must have been a lot and -"

His hand grabbed one of hers and she came to a halt.

"A walk sounds lovely, Virgina."

Hearing him use her given name and not her nickname - Tony's nickname - felt odd, but still a pleasant warmth spread in her lower abdomen. He offered her his arm and she looped one of hers through his.

* * *

Tony scoured through the last occupied floor, looking for red and yellow badges, but apparently all victims and injured people had been sent to safety. He was about to wrap the mission up and bring the three paramedics and two firefighters back down, when he heard a scream from the open skylight.

"Sir! Come back in here, we can help you!" The paramedic, who was a girl shouted at someone from above.

Tony flew out to see what was happening.  
A man was standing on the roof flailing his arms, looking wild.

"No-one will help me! I have been waiting for three hours already for someone to bring me down. Everyone was more important or more injured than me. You are liars! You want me to die! But I won't die! You can not kill me!" He shouted, but backed off further towards the edge.

"Sir, look there is Iron Man he can help you. He will bring you down. Help is…"

"Iron Man is a murderer! He murdered Hammer! He will kill us all. You are a liar. You are all liars!" The man shouted.

"What's wrong?" Tony asked the girl through the earpiece which was connected to the team.

"He seems to be having a panic attack. He is completely delusional." She answered. "I will try to get him."

"What?! No!" But before he could get the words out she already moved towards the man. He on the other hand saw her as a threat and attacked her, sending them both flying off the roof.

Tony's thrusters kicked into action, chasing after them, but they were too far apart from each other to save both. He had to make the decision and he needed to make it fast as the ground was nearing rapidly.

"J?" He asked.

"Mr. Charles might survive the fall, as he is bound to land in a pile of garbage. Miss Mansen has zero chance of survival, if she hits the ground at full speed." JARVIS analyzed quickly and Tony made his decision.

Three feet before she hit the ground Tony managed to get her and they shot back into the air again. Her clinging to him tightly, before he sat her down gently.

"I think I owe you a drink." She panted as his faceplate went up.

He didn't know why, but he really wanted to go and grab a drink with her. Tony didn't know why but he had instantly liked her. Not in an overly sexual way, like he normally felt toward women. But she was genuinely interesting and - there was no better word for it - cool. Tony wanted to hang out with her and get to know her.

"Let me get the rest back down and we're out of here."

* * *

**Yeah, so that's it for today. Hope you liked it.  
Leave me some love and I'll see you in the beginning of October (:**


	14. Galway Girl

**Chapter 14: Galway Girl**

**Hello again!  
I'm back. And no this story is not discontinued.  
Also I plan on updating more frequently now, so expect the next chapter on ****Monday!**

**Still leave me a review to motivate me further.**

**I am sorry that there is not so much fluff at the moment, but believe me! It will be worth the wait. **

**I know that "Van" in the lyrics is a reference for Van Morrison and not Van Halen, but it fit my story better this way.**

**Happy reading everyone! (:**

**Song: Galway Girl by Ed Sheeran**

* * *

**Galway Girl**

"Is it really ok I lend this clothes?" Tony asked and pulled at the lapels of the dark brown leather jacket.

"Yeah. Roy won't be around for another few days!" Emily answered.

After Tony had brought every one down, the female paramedic had took him back to her apartment, where he could take his suit off and take a shower. To make himself presentable she had lent him a few clothes from her flatmate. Currently the two of them were on their way to Emily's favorite bar. She owed him a drink after all, for him saving her.

"Thank's again for saving me, by the way." Emily said and put her hands in her back-pocket, smiling at him, her dark eyes shining in the streetlights. She had changed into black jeans and a purple t-shirt, as well as a back leather jacket which hugged her curves and set off her assets. She had tied her brown hair up in a high ponytail, and smokey eye makeup highlighted her big, hazel eyes.

"JARVIS calculated who had the better chance of surviving the fall without my help, and it was him. Soooo… technically…"

"Stark, take a compliment." She interrupted him.

"I know, I'm awesome." He shot her his trademark grin, while she bumped her shoulder with his to scold him. "Where are we heading, anyways? You know we could go to any bar... I'm a billionaire, so money doesn't matter." Tony asked.

"It's just around the corner. Patience, Mr. Stark."

"Please call me Tony. Mr. Stark's my father and we're not in a work environment." He said. The last part somewhat bitterly, remembering how long it had taken Pepper to finally call I'm by his first name.

"Ok, Tony. I" She stretched out her hand, as to shake his and he took it. "am Emily."

"Emily, it is very nice to meet you." Placing a delicate kiss on her hand. Tony noticed the slight pink glow on her cheeks, but she giggled and took her hand back, letting it return to her back pocket.

"Your beard is tickling me. We're here." She apologized and Tony noticed how she could quite supress the grin that was spreading over her face.

When they reached a small bar entrance she started pulling the handle of the door, but Tony beat her to it and held it open for her.

"Thank you." She quipped and he entered after her.

* * *

"You are very welcome." Alex smiled and took her shoes from her hand. "Is the water cold?"

Pepper had wandered to the shore and taken her shoes off, feeling the wet sand and the pacific ocean beneath her toes. She had always loved the ocean. It seemed to put everything in perspective for her. All problems seemed to matter less and less, and she felt like she could breath freely for the first time. Somewhere trough their stroll down the beach Alex had taken the liberty to take the shoes he had been holding, so she could freely walk in the water. He noticed how her form visibly relaxed and how her eyes just stared out into the night.  
The sun had gone down half an hour ago, but the city and promenade lights helped them find their path.

"Yeah, it's a little chilly, given it's December, but once your feet are wet…" She answered, but left the statement hanging in the air..

Pepper now stood still, back turned towards him and just observed the water in front of her, her arms hugging herself.  
Alex then noticed that she might be cold, and figured her might as well try his luck.  
Pepper heard him come up behind her, splashing through the water with his feet. But instead of standing next to her, she felt his arms snake around her from behind, her back pressed against his chest, while he slowly rubbed her arms. At first she was frozen. This was only their first date, but it felt nice to get some attention.  
Not that Tony hadn't given her attention, but he always wanted something in return. To just be on the receiving end and not be under pressure to return anything or being forced into making a decision on the spot was a nice change.

Tony... why did she always compare anyone to him. And why did no-one ever seem to measure up to him.

But in this moment it just felt nice to be taken care of, so she laid her head back against shoulder and just basked in the moment.  
Still a small part of her, and she would have never admitted it wished it was Tony who stood behind her.

"Alex? Do you want to go and grab a beer in the bar back there?" Pepper said after some time.

"Yeah, maybe we should warm up before we head back to the car." He agreed and took her hand, trying to pull her with him.

"Wait, where are our shoes. I don't want to get them all wet and sandy."

"That's not a problem." Before Pepper knew what happened Alex had thrown her over his shoulder, cave man style and carried her toward the street, their shoes in his other hand. She laughed and commanded to let her down. Or at least she tried. She was too busy laughing and shrieking, to get a word out.

"Alex…" She said somewhat out of breath as he put her down, her sides hurt. "Don't ever, ever, ever do that again." But she laughed, while saying it.

"Or else?" He asked and laughed as well, handing her her shoes.

"Else there will be no second date." Pepper retorted and went past him, entering the bar.

* * *

"Two Jackies, Ryan!" She ordered with the blond bar tender and placed on of them in front of Tony.

"To Iron Man!" She toasted and downed her drink.

"To Iron Man." Tony retorted and drank the liquor himself. He winced slightly at the cheap taste - at least in his opinion and leaned against the bar.

"Do you smoke?" Emily asked and offered him a cigarette, after taking one herself.

"Yeah, sure why not?" Tony hadn't smoked cigarettes in years, he never actually liked the taste cigarettes left in his mouth and the way everything reeked afterwards. It was nothing compared to the rich flavor of fine cuban cigars he was used to, but tonight was about letting lose and having fun. Also it was even more unpleasant to kiss someone who had been smoking, when one wasn't smoking himself.

_Huh? Did I just consider kissing her? Easy there Stark…_ Before Tony finished his thoughts Emily was talking to him again over the noise.

"Stark?" She asked him and he just nodded, praying she had asked a question. "Ryan, can we have another round of those, to take with us outside?" Emily asked the guy behind the bar. After they received their drinks she pulled him after her through the crowd toward the back entrance

Outside was the basically the backyard of the bar. It was barely lit and there were only a few other people mingling outside, smoking as well. Emily held up the lighter and Tony leaned down towards her, lighting his cigarette.

"So how often are you in the city?" Emily asked and wrapped her own leather jacket tighter around herself. New York winters were chilly. Thank god it wasn't snowing yet.

"I grew up in New York actually. But I am not here very often anymore. I relocated pretty quickly to Malibu after my parents… well…" His parents death was still a very heavy and delicate topic for him. Only Pepper and Rhodey knew the full story and he wasn't sure why he started talking about that now, with a girl he barely knew. He then noticed he was fiddling with his cigarette and it was about to go out. Hastily he took another drag, and nearly choked on the smoke filling his lungs. It took all his self control to not cough openly and making a fool of himself. God he really hated smoking. Luckily Emily didn't seem to notice his struggle or at least she didn't comment on it.

"Tony. You don't have to talk about it, if you don't want to. I understand." Emily interrupted his thoughts suddenly. "So you're not in New York very often."

"Actually, Stark Industries just bought a premises, right behind grand central station." He just remembered Pepper had send the contracts over a few days ago. And he ignored the sting the thought of her brought through him.  
"So maybe I will be around here more often, who knows." He shrugged and tried to look casual while taking another drag.

"Oh wow! What are you planning on doing with it?" Emily looked genuinely interested.

"Um… To be honest, I have no idea." He laughed awkwardly and rubbed the back of his head with one hand, looking sheepish. "You'd have to ask Pepper this. She manages everything. But I guess it has something to do with clean energy."

"Pepper's your assistant, right?" Emily asked interested, already finishing her cigarette and putting it out in the ashtray.

"She's my Co-CEO now." Tony replied and the thought of Pepper left a bitter taste in his mouth. Wanting to change the subject he noticed the woman in front of him looked visibly cold and he was starting to freeze himself.

"Hey, you're shivering Em. Let's head back inside." He put his cigarette out as well and lead her back inside with one hand on the small of her back.

"Em?" She asked bemused and looked at him grinning.

"Yeah. It's shorter than Emily and I am all about effectiveness." Tony winked at her and she just laughed in return. "So might I buy you a drink now? The last to rounds were on you, now it's my turn."

"But I owe you for saving me." She insisted and moved towards the bar.

Tony grabbed her arm and pulled her back, toward him. "Yes and I am the billionaire here. Go grab us a table."

* * *

"Alright. But next round's on me!" Pepper called after Alex and went looking for a free nook.

Two minutes later he returned with two Guinnes and sat down next beside her.

"Any news from Tony yet?" He asked her softly and Pepper melted inside. He was asking how his competitor was, because he knew Pepper cared about him. Tony would have never done that.

"Yeah, JARVIS informed me about an hour ago his mission was over and he was fine, but he will be staying in New York for a while. So all is good, I guess." She smiled at him, despite the lump in her throat.

"Oh that's great."

An awkward silence fell over them, while Pepper played with the label on her glass. Suddenly some girls cheered and a song started playing in the bar.

"Oh no. I hate that song…" She groaned as the tunes of Sweet Caroline filled the bar and she put her hands over her eyes. The girls started cheering and singing a long, but very off tune.

"Not a Neil Diamond fan, I take it?" Alex laughed and took a sip of his Guinness.

"It's not about Neil Diamond per se, it's about the song in particular. I grew up in a very small town and at each and every gathering or festival it was played a hundred times. And everyone would freak out. If you'd have to listen to Sweet Caroline-"

"Good times never seemed so good." Alex filled in for her, teasing her, grinning.

"Shut up, Alex!" Pepper laughed. "I am serious."

"So good, so good." She lightly slapped him on the arm, but was still laughing. "Tell you what, as soon as we get the chance we take over the jukebox, and you can decide." He offered, placing a quarter on the table beside them.

"I'll hold you to your word." She pointed her index finger at him and smirked. "What do you listen to anyways?" She asked and took a sip herself. She had recognized the girls seemed to be a bachelorette party. She hated those as well.

"Mostly I like to listen to country and folk music." Pepper looked at him wide eyed and gulped. It wasn't that she was opposed to country and folk music, but if she were honest, it just wasn't her choice of music. She preferred classic rock or pop.

"Not what you like?" He laughed.

She winced and cast her eyes downward. "No. It's not that I don't like it, it's just… not what I normally listen to either."

"That's ok. We don't need to like everything the other one likes, right?" Alex shrugged, and took another swig.

"Yeah, that's true." Pepper saw the bachelorette party move along. "Oh look the girls are occupying a billiard table now. I am sorry, but you, Mr. need to go through some music that's not folk or country now." She grabbed the quarter, slid out of the booth and stood, stretching her hand out toward him.

Alex grabbed his heart and sighed theatrically. "Pepper, don't do this to me. How will I survive?"

"Fine, break a promise on the first date." She shrugged and moved to sit back down, yet the look on her face told him she was only playing along. Alex took hold of her hand and flung his arm and their joined hands around her shoulder.

"Here's the quarter." He handed her the 25ct piece back and walked her to the jukebox. "Now it's up to you."

* * *

Van Halen. She was dancing to Van Halen. She actually stood on a table and head banged to Van Halen.  
Tony had had the feeling before, that he'd like Emily and she was cool, but now his eyes nearly glazed over.  
Pepper might be the epitome of class, but Emily was the definition of cool. And it seemed she liked the same music as he did. Maybe Rhodey needed to watch out.

"Wow. I never would have guessed you liked Van Halen." He told her and gave her her drink back after the song was over.

"You kidding? I can NEVER pass on a classic." Emely laughed and climbed down, gratefully accepting the drink. "You don't dance, do ya?" She asked, giving him side long glance.

"Hm… do I dance?" Tony looked like he was deep in thoughts, really weighing his answer. Of course he would dance with this beautiful girl, but he couldn't let her win so easily, he had a reputation to keep up after all. "Would you like to dance?" Tony asked after all.

"I certainly wouldn't object." She smirked back at him. "I'll even let you pick the song."

"If that's the case…" Tony stood and walked over to the juke box, flipping through the options. When he was satisfied with his choice, he had already put his hand out towards Emily for her to take, before he fully turned towards her and twirled her once.

Several drinks, songs, and rather questionable dance moves - including the chicken dance on Emily's behalf, a very bad attempt at Russian Kozachok on Tony's part and both of them doing the Robot-Dance - later had them short of breath with effort and on the verge of tears with laughter.

"You up for a game?" She asked when she had calmed down slightly.

"Let me get you another drink and then maybe some pool?" Tony asked, while holding his sides, which were still hurting. "Puh it has been years since I last played billiard."

Emely hissed and winced slightly at him mentioning pool. "Sorry Tony. No can do."

"Oh Emily don't worry. If you're bad at it or have never played it…"

"Ah that's not it." She tried to interject, but Tony didn't let her finish.

"I am always happy to help you out, lend you a hand. Show you the ropes maybe." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and Emily started laughing. "I might even let you win the first round." Tony concluded, trying to reason with her, but Emily continued laughing. "What?" Tony finally asked a littler unsure of himself.

"Tony, take a look around you. There are no billiard tables in this bar." And her laughter between her laughs she muttered something about him being a "Genius.".

"Oh." Tony said somewhat defeated and felt a little embarrassed.

"But…" Emily smirked and suggestively raised an eyebrow at him, "We have a dart board in the back corner."

"Darts? I haven't played darts since college." Tony laughed.

Emily on the other hand stood, took her drink and sauntered away from him toward the back of the room, when she stopped in her steps and turned around towards him, looking expectantly. "Come on. I thought Iron Man would have an impeccable aim."

Tony just laughed at her quip. She really knew her banter.

* * *

After dancing and singing - the latter was pretty uncommon for Pepper, cause she had made it a general rule to never sing - Pepper now had her tongue stuck between her teeth aiming for the little white ball. She actually managed to hit it, but with way too much force and send it flying over the table. As the ball hit the ground with a loud thud, Pepper groaned and hung her head, touching her hands, which were still holding the cue with her forehead.

"I told you, I am so bad at this." She complained with a chuckle in her voice when she resurfaced. She handed the cue over to Alex after he picked up the white ball from the floor, as it was his turn now.

"Actually, Miss Potts, I think it was the tables fault and you have to repeat your try."

"Noo." Pepper whined. "Don't make it any harder on me. Let's just get it over with. And besides, it's against the rules." She pouted at him, but Alex just laughed at her and put the cue back in her hand.

"I'll help you." As he took her hand and pulled her in front of him Pepper felt a slight shiver run down her spine and a nervous flutter in her stomach. But when he put his hands on her waist, to align her body with he table and the cue, she felt warmth rising in her face and couldn't concentrate on the task at hand at all. She didn't even hear what he was saying.  
Feeling Alex so close to her… She just couldn't describe it. It felt good and natural to have him close. Yet a tiny part of wished it was actually Tony showing her how to play billiard. _No stop! Alex's a great guy. Just enjoy the moment. _She thought_.  
_Suddenly she felt her arm being moved forward and the cue colliding with the ball. The white ball actually hit another full ball and sent it right into the left center hole.  
"I did it?" She asked astounded, eyes wide with surprise.

"Yeah, you nailed one." He said equally excited.

"I did it!" She cheered and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him. Alex was pretty happy about her coming close on her own and hugged her back thrilled.

"Yeah, do another one." He encouraged her.

"Move over." She ordered, and shooed him away. "So, what exactly do I have to regard?" She bend towards the table, ready to follow his instructions.  
After Alex briefly explained them again, she hit the ball, but didn't score, narrowly missing a hole. "Darn." Pepper cursed, but still was happy to actually being able to aim properly.

"So now, that you can play, how about a small challenge?" Alex suggested and leaned onto his cue for support, smiling at her.

Pepper leaned on the table, looking at Alex expectantly. "Make your bet?"

"The loser pays the next dinner." He simply stated, just looking at her.

"Ah. That would imply there will be... a next date." Pepper said curtly, biting her lip as to prevent looking too excited and gazing at him questioningly.

"I certainly hope so, Miss Potts." He smiled warmly at her.

Pepper felt incredibly happy, he asked her for another date. But one part of his little speech, the last part stung. _Miss Potts... _it reminded her of Tony. Somehow the usage of last names seemed to have been a _thing_ between her and Tony over the last decade and especially the last year. It was a form of endearment between them. Hearing it come from Alex lips kind of felt - and she hated that she couldn't think of a better word for how it felt - wrong. It was like Miss Potts belonged to Tony, and Tony alone.

"What did I say something wrong?" Alex asked, his brows furrowed in worry. He had noticed how she was suddenly avoiding his eye side, looking uncomfortable and anywhere but at him.

"It's just…" She didn't know how to tell him without sounding rude or pathetic. "Could… you not call me that? Please?"

"Uhm, sure." He said baffled. "I am sorry, if I upset you, Pepper."

"You didn't." She answered quickly, wanting to reassure him. "It just reminds me of… something, I would rather not think about." She sigh and winced slightly at the awkward silence, which settled between them. "Whew, sorry that was… kind of a buzzkill." She laughed nervously, trying to lighten the mood.

"How about we pretend it didn't happen? Let's just rewind." Alex suggested and Pepper hummed questingly at him. He in turn moved a few steps backwards, doing some weird movements with his body.

"So now, that you can play, how about a small challenge? The loser pays the next dinner." He asked again and held the cue out toward her.

Pepper took the cue and sniggered, repeating her answer. "That would imply there will be a next date."

"I certainly hope so, Pepper." Alex replied, smoldering, only this time he used her name.

"Well, in that case…" Pepper started and aimed for the white ball, dunking two half balls. She straightened and put one hand on her hip, the other one holding the cue, head crooked, smiling wickedly at him. "I'm game."

* * *

After five losses to Emily, Tony called it quits and went to get another round of shots.

"Stop sulking, Stark." Emily teased him. Tony in return only grumbled. "You're a sore loser." She remarked with another laugh.

But Tony actually wasn't sulking or even upset about his loss, he actually admired her ability and finesse with the darts. Also her lightheartedness and positive spirit was infectious. It wasn't that Pepper wasn't positive or lighthearted, but she always had that professional composure to her attitude. It seemed like Pepper wasn't able to just let go. There was always something there, that made it seem like she was holding back, restricting herself.

And for once it was a nice change, refreshing even to spend time with someone, who could let go completely and just live in the moment.

"Oh jeeze." Emely suddenly called out, gaze fixed on her watch. "I have an early shift tomorrow. And it's 02:30 am already." She looked up at him, apologetically. And then she started laughing. "Guess I'll be living off of espresso, I think."

Tony couldn't help it, but her laughter was contagious and he reached out to brush her hand with his. When Emily didn't pull back and met his glaze, he intertwined their fingers and noticed she was slightly blushing under his stare, but firmly holding his.

"We can always head out." He rasped out in a hushed whisper.

Emily in return harrumphed and blushed even deeper. "Gosh. I normally won't do this, and I'm not your -"

"You're rambling." Tony smoldered, interrupting her.

"You're right." She said and caught herself. "You can walk me home and get your stuff, and we'll take it from there. I'm not promising anything, though." She said confidently.

"Fine with me," Tony answered and let go of her hand, moving toward the door, while guiding her with a hand at the small of her back.

* * *

Of course Alex had won their little game, but Pepper was a close second, both only fighting to nail the 8 ball.

It was well past 02:30 am as the bartender politely, but affirmatively asked them to leave, because it was closing time.

"Uhm Alex, can I ask for a favor? Can you not talk to Rhodey about us? Just yet?" Pepper asked carefully, wringing her hands nervously, eyes cast downwards.

"Sure thing. But may I ask why, Pepper?" His head was crooked and he looked sympathetically at her.

"I just don't want Tony to know about… us? Just yet? At least until we know…" She turned bright red while rambling on. "Until we are sure what we … And I want to tell him -"

"I get it, Pepper." Alex said calmly and lovingly. He adored her rambling and that she was so uncomfortable in saying what she was trying to say made him like her even more. "You want to tell him yourself and not him finding out through Rhodey or by accident. That's ok. I won't tell Rhodey we had a date." Alex finished his sentence with a big smile and put his hands in his pockets in a relaxed manner.

"I hope it's not only one date." Pepper admitted quietly, almost sounding sheepish.

"That's great," He responded and took her hand, "because I certainly hope so, too. And not just because you now owe me dinner." He proceeded to hold his arm out for her and started walking her in the direction of his car. As they made their way along the shoreline, he noticed her failing to try to stifle a yawn. "I think your bed is calling for you. Come on let's get you home."

Pepper noticed he was using _you_ not us and she was very relieved about that. She liked Alex, but she certainly wasn't ready to have him come in for a "coffee", figuratively speaking.  
Yet, when he dropped her off and went her up to her door, Pepper pulled him back after he turned to leave and closed the distance between them. It was short but sweet and felt pleasant. After they broke apart Pepper smiled at him promisingly, while Alex looked blissfully dazed.

"Wow. I didn't see that coming." He said dreamily, a foolish smile gracing his lips.

"Me neither." Pepper admitted, blushing slightly. "But it really was a nice evening. And I felt like doing it, so I did."

"Can we do it again?" Alex asked, sounding like a kid on Christmas.

Pepper chuckled, but nodded. And he was leaning in again. It was sweet and passionate and nice, his hands laying casually on her waist, hers resting on his ribcage. After a few minutes he pulled back and rested his forehead on hers, breathing deeply. When he lifted his head, he bushed her hair from her face lovingly and gave her another quick peck. "I really should go now. You're tired."

"Ok." Pepper said, staring at his lips.

"Stop looking at me like this, you're making it hard to leave." He protested.

"I am trying to." Pepper whispered back.

Alex chuckled at that and pressed a light kiss to her cheek, finally letting her go. "Good Night, Pepper." He said and left for his car.

"Good night, Alex." Pepper murmured to herself, closing the door behind her, resting her head against it in defeat.

The kiss was good and very pleasant, astoundingly great, even. But she knew there was one, only one very _very_ small problem. The moment Pepper had closed her eyes, in her mind it had not been Alex who she was kissing…

* * *

When Tony went inside to get his things, Emily suddenly appeared with a bag of Doritos and cheap red wine in her living room, persuading him to stay for one glass. Of course she hadn't needed much persuasion.

An hour later Tony found himself wishing, the hair which was spilling over his chest wasn't brown…


	15. Der Rest vun dingem Levve

**Chapter 15: Der Rest vun dingem Levve - The rest of your life**

**Ok I got like two reviews for the last chapter. If you don't like it, please leave constructive criticism. I know you all want Pepperony, and it will come. Eventually. I promise! This whole story is roughly constructed in 4 phases, kinda like the MCU. Phase one was up until their first kiss, now phase two is nearly completed with getting over each other and we're strongly moving towards phase three. **

**I promise were nearing Pepperony stuff and I will get there eventually. But I don't want to spoil the story and I don't want it to be unrealistic and go like and then they kissed and everything was fine. Thats not how life works.  
****If you don't like it, tell me and I am open for ideas and stuff.  
****But if neither of you want to read on, I might discontinue this FF here and just continue it for myself and some close friends privately.**

**I also know you dislike Alex and I'll keep that in mind. And I get you hate that Pepper is getting together with someone else. I hate that, too and I hate writing it. But to come full circle we need to get through this stuff now, and if I can bear to write this I know you can bear to read it ;-)**

**As always I don't have a beta, so al mistakes are mine.**

**I partly translated the song from German to English, but only the important parts.**

**Song: Der Rest vun dingem Levve by Kasalla**

* * *

**Der Rest vun dingem Levve - The rest of your life**

Pepper woke, feeling more relaxed then ever. Or so she thought. The few minutes until her mind was fully awake, she indeed felt really happy. Alex had been wonderful and she had certainly enjoyed their date far more than she had initially thought. And their kiss had been wonderful, though she had really surprised herself when she had made the first move. Normally she would never do something like this on a first date. But to be honest she had felt quite adventurous the night before and the whole evening could easily be counted as two dates. Yes, in hindsight last night had been near perfect.

And yet she couldn't help it, but her heart sank a little. She had a nagging feeling in the back of her chest and it felt suspiciously close to cheating, although she wasn't with Tony and had told him off a few times already.

_Stop it Pepper! You're not with him, you are single for gods sake! Or at least you are free to go on dates with Alex if you please._

But her biggest fear was that she would eventually have to face Tony. She had tried to stay clear off his path and stay away from him, but this afternoon they would be attending a budget meeting together, that was if Tony Stark actually showed up.

With a sigh Pepper finally managed to chase her bad thoughts nearly completely from her head and rose to get ready for her day.

* * *

When Tony woke that morning he looked over at Emily, but she was already gone. It was odd, she was the first one he actually had slept next to, instead of fleeing directly after the deed was done.  
And the feeling was even more odd, now that he was the one, who apparently had been left.  
Tony rose from her bed and proceeded walking into her kitchen, looking for his brown haired companion. On her kitchen table he noticed a sticky note, right next to an empty but clean coffee mug. In neat script a few words were written on it.

_Hey Tony,  
__Coffee's in the machine.  
__Had a great night. Thanks.  
__Have a good flight home. _

_Emily _

_PS: Just close the door after you. _

He noticed she hadn't left her mobile phone number for him, which meant she didn't want to see him again or didn't expect him to see her again.

It really was a weird feeling. Suddenly all woman he tried to be with or had been with didn't want to be with him. In the past women had been falling over their feet to try and get him **and then stay** with him. More than one time Pepper had run a paternity test for him, all negative of course, but still. And now women seemed to be scrambling away as fast as possible when he showed a little interest. And he wasn't sure how he felt about it.

Tony decided to not shower in her apartment, first off he really didn't want to rummage through her drawers to find some towels, second he would be sweaty after he returned to Malibu again and third he didn't have any clean clothes anyways. But coffee sounded great at the moment.  
He grabbed the empty cup and found half a can of coffee under the machine. With a sigh Tony sat down and pulled out his phone looking for updates from Jarvis.

The first thing, that popped up was a reminder for the budget meeting in LA this afternoon with Pepper. He really didn't want to go there, and after their fight he didn't want to see her either. She wanted space and him to get over her, but there was only so much he could do. And after tonight… He didn't know why, but he actually felt a little guilty for sleeping with Emily. Another feeling he had never experienced before. Guilt. His last one night stand had been before Afghanistan and before a kidnapping had put his life in perspective. And it had been long before he had figured out he was in love with his assistant and woman who was already running his life. In love with a woman who didn't reciprocate his feelings, which hurt more than he had ever thought.

He really didn't want to see Pepper…

After finishing his coffee, Tony put on his suit, which was difficult and took a while without the help of the robots.

"Good Morning, Sir. It is currently 01:14 pm. The weather in New York is sunny -" The AI greeted him, as Tony stepped out on the street and launched into the sky.

"Mornin' Buddy. Let's get home." Tony said lightly, interrupting JARVIS' initial report and flew over the Empire State building and around One World Observatory, waving to a few tourists already crowding the spots.

"Estimated time of arrival is 12:06 pm Malibu local time. Just in time to attend the meeting with Miss Potts." JARVIS concluded.

"Yeah, about that… Not gonna happen. Send Pepper a message."

* * *

As she emerged from the shower she noticed her phone, which lay on her sink, indicated she had a new message.  
Actually she had two new messages, one from Tony and one from Alex. Pepper bit her lip, contemplating which one to open first before she decided to get it over with and open Tony's message first.

**Prob. Wont make it 2 the meeting. Still in NY. Sry. -T**

Relief washed over her. Now she had one less thing to worry about today. Two actually. She knew Tony was safe and she wouldn't have to see him today.  
Lightly humming to herself - _huh? When did that happen?_ \- Pepper opened Alex's message.

**Good morning P. Hope you slept well. Thx for the g8 night yesterday! Have a g8 day. :) - Alex **

He really was sweet, texting her to just wish her a nice day and it made her heart ache a little. With a sweet smile playing on her lips she texted back:

**Morning to you, too. I slept very well, thanks for asking. Hope you'll have a great day, too. **

Pepper thought about it for a second, then decided to go with her guts:

**Love, Pepper :-*** and hit send.

She proceeded to text with Alex through out the day and noticed she was checking her phone more frequently than usual during her meeting.

Around 4 pm another beep indicated her google alert about Iron Man had a new message. Pepper sighed to herself and opened it. It was an article in a gossip magazine with a big picture, showing Iron Man in front of a New York apartment building, about to fly off.  
Normally Pepper wouldn't read gossip articles about Tony or Iron Man, after all she normally knew already or they were bullshit. But she hadn't seen Tony in a few days now and had to admit she wasn't practically up to date at the moment. So she decided to quickly scan over the article.

_This morning worlds best known and infamous Playboy Superhero Iron Man was seen as he left a New Yorker apartment building. It is supposed he visited someone there, since it's a few blocks away from where the unfortunate event the day before happened.  
__Maybe it has something to do with the girl Tony Stark has been seen with the night before drinking and dancing in a bar._

There was a picture of Tony and a girl smoking somewhere outdoors and another one of the same girl and him in a bar, Tony apparently cheering her on, while she was… Head-banging?

_Whew, she certainly is a wild one. The two of them had been seen as they left the bar together. But their trace has been lost afterwards.  
__However, it looks like Tony Stark is back to his old days, returning to the playboy lifestyle. _

She didn't want to do it and afterwards she hated herself for it, but before Pepper knew what she was doing she had already called Tony's number and punched in her code to get trough to JARVIS directly.

"Good afternoon, Miss Potts." The AI greeted her, polite as always.

"You too, JARVIS." Pepper said back. "JARVIS, when did Tony return?"

"Mr. Stark returned at 12:08 this afternoon, Miss Potts." The AI answered promptly and direct.

"When did his mission end?" Pepper asked and closed her eyes, dreading his answer.

"Mr. Stark's mission had been wrapped at the Woolworth Building at 10:35 pm yesterday evening."

"JARVIS, initiate protocol VPP27051972106." That meant their conversation was now confidential and Tony wouldn't know about it, until he asked about it specifically or if the AI determined it concerned Tony's safety. Tony had installed this feature a few years ago when he had accidentally discovered Pepper had been ordering lingerie over her work computer. Pepper had been mortified and nearly died of embarrassment. She hadn't returned to work for nearly an entire week - that had been the only time she had called in sick on her own will - and had only agreed to return after Tony had installed the protocol.

"What did Tony do afterwards?"

"He accompanied a team of paramedics back to their station and then went with one of them to change and shower."

Pepper recognized her breath hitching in her throat. "Did… Hrrrm…" She coughed uncomfortable. "Did he stay with her?"

"Not exactly, Miss. He left with her and went to a bar. They changed locations again at 02:37 am back to the apartment."

"He stayed the night." It really wasn't a question, but he answered anyways.

"His GPS data indicates so, Miss Potts." JARVIS replied, and Pepper knew she just imagined it, because he was a computer, but to her JARVIS sounded a little apologetic.

"What's her name?" Pepper asked after a short pause, unable to stop herself.

"Emily Nisan. She's originally from New York, finished high school upstate and attended nursery school for 3 years, but decided to become a paramedic, rather than a nurse." After a short moment, where Pepper didn't speak the AI continued: "Do you need further information, Miss?"

Pepper had tears in her eyes. She knew she had no reason to cry, no reason to blame anyone but herself, she had turned him down, hell she even had told him to get over her. But it still hurt her that he indeed had moved on so quickly.

_You're a freakin' hypocrite, Pepper. Yesterday you ran around kissing other men and now you're crying, cause Tony did the same?_ Pepper thought.

Except he didn't just kiss this Emily.

_But maybe it was only a one night stand. Back to his old ways would be better than…_

She couldn't think about that. She couldn't or she would probably break down.

"JARVIS, how long did he stay?"

"Mr. Strak left her apartment at 01:13 pm New York time this afternoon."

Now tears escaped her eyes. Her biggest fear and hope at the same time had just come true. He hadn't left her right away. That meant he really was moving on, and she didn't need to feel guilty about dating Alex.  
On the other hand her feelings for Tony wouldn't just disappear from one day to the other. And it hurt to hear this Emily girl apparently was more than just a one night stand, after all he stayed with her for the night.  
But what was done was done. Now she had to lay in the bad she had made, no need to cry anymore.

"Thank you, JARVIS. Please don't let Mr. Stark know I called." And Pepper hung up, putting her head in her hands, taking a deep breath.  
She didn't know where to go from here, but she was sure she couldn't talk to Tony about this girl, and she couldn't tell him about Alex either or she would have to hear about this girl. And she didn't want that. Not now at least. Just because she had to live with the situation, didn't mean she had to like or further it even more.

* * *

Pepper and Tony continued living in peaceful co-existence. They were rarely in the same room for more than half an hour. In meetings they both attended they wouldn't communicate silently anymore. No more lingering glances, no more not-so-accidental brush of hands. They didn't grab dinner or lunch together after meetings and either Pepper or Tony drove to meetings themself, when the other asked Happy do drive. Happy on the other hand had a lot more time off, because Pepper and Tony didn't communicate with each other and there were often misunderstandings who would ride with Happy.

It wasn't that the air was tense between the two of them or that they were still fighting, they simply did not want to talk to each other.

Tony because he felt guilty for sleeping with Emily. And he didn't want to hurt Pepper, but he felt like when would he opened his mouth in her presence he would spill everything to her, only making their strained relationship worse.

Pepper because she was still hurt by her discovery about Tony, and conflicted because she wanted him move on and yet it hurt. And lastly she felt guilty because of Alex. She wasn't really sure where he stood in their quarrel.  
Pepper really liked him, like really liked him, but she didn't want to just use him to get over Tony.

About two weeks and 6 dates later, Peppers guilty feelings were nearly gone. She enjoyed spending time with Alex and he really helped her relax after long and dreadful meetings with his light and funny attitude.

They had yet to really share a bed, but Pepper felt more and more comfortable and at ease around him. That didn't mean they hadn't had some heated make out sessions on her couch or her front door and once in his car, but the invisible line to more intimate things had yet to be crossed.  
Pepper wanted to wait and really be sure she wanted to be with him for who he was, and not to just convince herself he was better for her than Tony was. And with each and every date that went by, Pepper managed to convince herself he might be the one.

Still at night it wasn't Alex who haunted her dreams.

It was the evening before her 38th birthday and she waited for Alex to come around and help her put the last things up for her birthday party the next day.  
Just as Pepper had finished drying off the last glasses and putting them on the buffet table with the rest of them, her door bell rang.

"Hey B, how are you?" Alex greeted her and pressed a chaste kiss to her cheek as he entered, a large bag in hand. He started calling her B instead of Pepper or Pep after their third date, he said he wanted his own pet and nickname for her, instead of Pepper, because honestly it felt more like her normal given name, than Virginia. So he came up with **Beautiful** as her pet name, which made Pepper blush furiously every time he used it. This and the length of the pet-name made him shorten it, so he started to just call her B.  
Pepper honestly couldn't care less about how people called her. She had had so many nicknames in her life already and practically listened to everything, that wasn't an insult by now. With Tony she sometimes even reacted to whistles, something she admittedly resented herself for. She wasn't a dog after all.

"Hi Alex. Whats in the bag?" She asked wearily.

"Your birthday present." He grinned at her.

"You really shouldn't have…"

"I didn't. I promised I won't buy you anything big and I didn't. Just let yourself be surprised." That was something she really admired about him. He actually listened and respected her requests and wishes, totally different from a certain Ex-Boss of hers who once even bought her a car for her saints day. "Ok what first?" He returned to where she stood in the kitchen and looked expectantly at her, rubbing his hands.

"Uhm decorations in the living room and then we have to clean out the closet by the door, incase people bring jackets." She said and grabbed a box with stuff from her kitchen table.

"Ok what about the guest list?" Alex asked and looked at the paper laying next to the box.

"Rhodey is coming, few friends from accounting and colleagues, some people from the board, Happy, maybe his - for the lack of a better word - maybe-soon-girlfriend Ellis." Pepper grinned at this thought, she was so happy for Happy. He truly deserved to have someone who loved him and be there for him. "Also Lisa with her husband. So 20 People give or take." Pepper finished and moved over to the living room, Alex following her.

"And Tony?" He asked carefully. The last few weeks he had noticed Pepper avoided talking about Tony Stark like the plague. Not that he wanted to talk about her boss, who clearly had the hots for his… girlfriend? Was Pepper his girlfriend? He hoped so. But he knew the two were close when he met her and it striked him as odd she didn't mention him at all after he disappeared to New York.

"Uhhhh…" Pepper started. "We are not exactly on speaking terms at the moment. And I doubt he would remember my birthday anyways. He never does. So I wouldn't expect seeing him here tomorrow." Pepper answered, but avoided Alex eyes.

"Pepper, you ok?" He asked wearily.

"Yeah, sure." She smiled warmly at him. If only he knew that she wished the smile would have been an honest on. "Just a bit tired." She shrugged and turned away.

They continued working and decorating her home for the party, testing out her music system and prepared the rest of the food. They didn't notice how the time passed by. At 11:57 pm Alex phone started chirping, a reminder that her birthday approached rapidly.

"I guess someone is about to become a birthday girl." Alex announced and went to grab something from the large bag. He took out a bottle of Moet dry in a portable cooler and retrieved two champagne glasses from her cupboard, opening the beverage on his way back into the kitchen.  
Pepper blushed a lovely shade of red and hid her face, and genuine grin in her hands for a moment, before accepting one glass.

"Too your birthday, and many more to come!" He toasted to her.

"Too us." Pepper answered and clinked the glasses. "So that's what you needed that outrageous bag for?" She laughed after she took a sip.

"Not exclusively." Alex concluded. "Would you hold that for me?" He handed her his glass and turned toward the hallway where the bag was. "Allow me to give you my present right now? I don't know if I'll have the guts to do it tomorrow in front of a lot of people." He laughed nervously and returned with a beautiful sunburst black and red guitar. Pepper looked questionably at him, but excitedly all the same. "I wrote you a song."

That was the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for her and a big grin, along with an even deeper shad of red crossed her face. "I'd love to hear it!"

"But I have to warn you," he started rambling nervously. "It turned out a little sappy and it's probably not the best lyrical piece and -"

Pepper had quickly closed the distance between Tham and kissed him square on the mouth to shut him up. "Just play it. I'm sure I'll love it."

"Huh… ok" He started picking the strings and began singing quietly. "I don't have any idea about Quantum Theory. I'm no rocket scientist, honey forgive me. I'm no genius, but I know one and one makes two. What do you think? Do you kind of feel it too?" His song continued on for some time. Pepper couldn't get the grin from her face. His voice was pretty damn good and his guitar skills were outstanding. He sang about how he would follow her, where ever she would go, and she really loved the few self ironical bits where he compared himself to Tony, and how he made clear he was better that Tony in a not arrogant, but nice and logical way. He sang about how he was sure about her and their developing relationship.

"So, are you free for the rest of you life? Because I would like to spend mine by your side. You are where I belong, for now till our dying song. Are you free for the rest of your life?" He ended the song and looked up at her carefully.  
Pepper had tears in her eyes, biting her lip and looking at him wide eyed but not able to say anything yet. To be honest, she wasn't sure if and what he had just proposed to her.

"Would you say something?" Alex asked quietly and worriedly. "Anything."

"Alex, that was beautiful. But I am not sure what exactly you are … uhm…proposing…"

His eyes went wide in realization. "Oh god!" His hand flew to his mouth. "I'm not… I'm not proposing as in PROPOSING." He laughed relieved, now understanding why she didn't answer him directly. "I wanted to ask you, whether we are now… God, I feel like a school boy again asking this. I wanted to know if you and me… Do you want…" But she cut his rambling off with another kiss.

Now that they were back on the same page she wanted him to stop worrying. "Yes, I want to be your girlfriend, and I want us to be official and all." She said and chuckled at his relived look.

He grabbed her waist and said "Thank god." Before kissing her passionately.

When they pulled apart he looked at his watch and noticed it was well past one already. Time flies when you're having fun. "As much as I hate to leave you right now, tomorrow will be a long and excitingly stressful day. I should go home, and you, Miss birthday girl should get some sleep, too." He brushed some hair behind her ear as Pepper escaped a yawn.

"Why bother leaving?" She asked with a glint in her eye. "My bed is big enough for two." And she took his hand and pulled him in the general direction of her bedroom.

"But I have nothing with me for a… sleepover." Alex said sheepishly.

"You're telling me, there is nothing else in this bag, just in case…?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"No. I don't want to push you to anything you don't feel comfortable with, B." He rubbed his hair, feeling a little stupid.

Pepper's insides turned to pudding at this. He was so careful and considerate with her. He didn't even prepared for those circumstances, to not scare her away, and it made her want him even more now.

"It's ok. I think I can manage sleeping next to you, when you are wearing boxers, and you can run home and change tomorrow morning. Also, I always have some new toothbrushes around. So will you stay?" She asked and put on her best puppy dog eyes.

"How can I say no to the birthday girl?" He hushed and kissed her deeply, pushing her inside her bedroom, closing the door.

The next morning Pepper needed two additional coffees to really wake up and stay awake.

* * *

**Thanks for reading, please leave me a review :)**


	16. Angle with a Shotgun

**Chapter 16: Angel with a Shotgun**

**I am overwhelmed by the response I got from you guys. I am sorry if I came off as demanding and whiny. I just have very low confidence in my own writing, since one of my high school teachers told me way back, I suck at writing. But I couldnt help myself back then and I can't help myself because I want to tell this story and I am constantly trying to improve. But when you get no feedback it can be very discouraging. **

**But thank you all so SO much! I literally cried from the responses and I am more than happy that most of you like the story.**

**Also I know we all want Pepperony and like I said, we are entering Phase III now. So stay tuned. Also I might sprinkle little flashbacks and Pepperony snippets here and there, to keep you hooked, till we come to the good stuff.**

**I'm also trying to update every Monday or Tuesday from now on. **

**And now: Happy reading (:**

**Song: Angel with a Shotgun by The Cap**

* * *

**Angel with a Shotgun**

People were mingling in her kitchen and living room. Pepper currently put out the second tray with bowle and had already refreshed the beer supply twice.

It was half past 11 and her guests seemed to be enjoying themselves. It looked like Lisa and Alex were getting along very well, which was a very good sign, since she was her best friend and he was her boyfriend - though Lisa technically didn't know that yet.

Boyfriend. Pepper Potts really had a boyfriend. For the first time in over 12 years she had found a male human being, who was willing to put up with her crazy schedule and even crazier work hours and most importantly was willing to face the hazard that would be inevitable when you'd date a woman a certain superhero had declared his own property. And Alex did all that. That still made her smile.  
Not even 24 hours ago he had asked her to be his girlfriend - officially. With the sweetest of songs and gestures.  
Thinking about last night - and this morning, for the matter - still made her blush a little, but also a grin still spread across her face.

"What are you grinning at, girl?" She heard her best friend asking from the kitchen door, as she refilled the ice bucket at the dispenser from the fridge. As she turned she saw Lisa leaning against the door frame, watching her and smiling knowingly.

Pepper noticed her champagne glass, which she held in her hands was empty.

"Do you want another?" Pepper asked her, deliberately avoiding the question, while putting the ice tray on the counter and rummaging through the fridge in search for the champagne.

"Yes. But I also want my answer." Lisa quipped and strode over to her. "You certainly got yourself a nice boyfriend." Pepper heard the taunting in her voice and blushed a bit.

"I guess you know then, what I was grinning about." Pepper answered and smiled, filling Lisa's glass and one for her own.

"So he _is_ your boyfriend!" Lisa squealed and looked surprised, yet happy, cheering a little and clinking her glass with Pepper's. "Since when are you two official? I can't believe you haven't told me!" She chided.

"Calm down, Lish. We only got official yesterday…"

"Pepper!" She exclaimed in frustration. "I didn't even know you were dating. I want details."

"I haven't said anything, because I haven't been sure. But Alex is wonderful. Just wonderful." Pepper said dreamily, smiling despite herself.

"And?" Lisa asked, staring at her.

"And?" Pepper asked feigning ignorance.

"Pep! It's like pulling teeth with you. I want to know everything!" Lisa grabbed her arm gently and shook her.

"Okay, okay. Calm down." Pepper chuckled. "He played a song on his guitar for me, one he wrote himself and basically asked me to be his girlfriend. It was so cute. No-one has ever done something so sweet for me!" Pepper smiled to herself, thinking about his song. "When he was finished I kissed him… And well, he spent the night." Her face, again broke into a grin and her cheeks pinked slightly.

"And?" Lisa interrupted excitedly.

"And what?" Pepper responded this time honestly no knowing what else Lisa wanted to hear.

"How was it?" Lisa pressed and winked.

"How was… Oh." Pepper blushed furiously and realized what she wanted to know. "Uhm it was…" Pepper stammered and sipped her champagne to get time. Lisa was her best friend and back in the day they had been pretty open with each other, practically knowing everything about each others experiences and sex life, but for Pepper it had been, quite frankly a while since she had actually been with someone and now she was actually embarrassed and uncomfortable talking about the topic.

Suddenly there was the sound of glass shattering from the living room.

"Uhhh Pepper?" Rhodey popped his head in the kitchen and grinned innocently at her. "The bowle bowl might have toppled over, when Happy greeted me. It might or might not have busted into a million pieces. Can you show me where I find a cloth and maybe a vacuum cleaner? You know, just in case." Pepper looked at him wide eyed and frozen in place, champagne still in hand. Then she closed her eyes for a second and when she opened them again she downed the rest of her champagne and placed the glass on the counter.

"That bowl belonged to my grandma." Pepper stated and hung her head.

"Happy birthday by the way." Rhodey exclaimed slowly and tired not to cringe too much.

He, and Lisa were really surprised when she started laughing. "Thanks Rhodey! Let me clean up the mess and I'll greet you properly. I never liked that bowl anyways."

"Saved by Rhodey, huh?" Lisa called after her as Pepper was halfway through the kitchen already, cloth in hand, kissing Rhodey on the cheek as she passed. "I will hear the rest of this, Pepper!"  
Then Lisa turned to Rhodey, who she had met quite a few times already and greeted him with a warm hug. "Hey Colonel. Long time no see!"

"Hey Lawyer Lady!" He returned the hug and smiled at her. "How have you been?"

They continued having smalltalk for a while until, Will entered the kitchen, joining them.  
"Since when does Pepper have a boyfriend?" He asked his wife and grabbed a beer from the fridge. Rhodey on the other hand nearly spit the swig he just had taken.

"Pepper has a boyfriend?" Rhodey asked shocked.

"Yeah, since pretty much yesterday." Lisa answered and smiled, excited for her friend.

"Who's she with?" Rhodey asked, happy for her, but also slightly worried. Two of his best friend had the hots for her and he wanted to neither of them to get hurt.

"I'm with Alex." Pepper said from the door, entering the kitchen, Alex in tow.

"Yes, we are an item. Officially. Since yesterday." Alex said and kissed her sweetly.

Lisa squealed delighted, so happy to finally see Pepper happy. Rhodey smiled too, though it didn't quite reach his eyes.  
No-one noticed his look of concern, underlining his smile, except for Pepper. Alex high fived with Will and Rhodey congratulated them too.  
Still Pepper caught his gaze and knew what he was silently asking her.

"Whew, ok guys. Time to join the party again, I'll be out in another minute, as well." Pepper said and pressed a drink in everyones hand. "Shoo, shoo, get out. Ho socialize. Rhodey." She added and looked at him intently, asking him silently to stay another minute as well.

"How long have you two been dating?" Rhodey asked, when the others had left.

"A couple of weeks." Pepper answered honestly, but defensively.

"Does Tony know, you two have been dating?" He asked carefully.

Pepper crossed her harms over her chest, like she wanted to protect herself from this topic. "No, he doesn't."

Rhodey sighed and crossed his arms as well, looking at her, studying her face. "Pepper, you know you'll have to tell him eventually. He has a right to know." As her answer Pepper just looked down.  
"You owe him the truth, Pepper. You know how he feels about you. He deserves to know, and he deserves to know from -"

"He deserves?!" Pepper cut him off. "I owe Tony nothing, Jimmy. You know what happened between us, and you know what he did to me."

"But Pepper, don't you think not telling him yourself would be... I don't know... too harsh, even after his latest stunt? You are always responsible and so loyal to him. You really should- "

Again Pepper interrupted him, and if Rhodey hadn't known any better, he would have said she had tears in her eyes. "Did you know he had a one night stand in New York? Did you know he slept with a girl after his mission there?"

Rhodey was shocked about the news, because he knew how Tony actually felt about Pepper. Hell Tony had even told him Pepper was the only one for him.  
"No. I… I didn't. I didn't know about that… I'm sorry, Pep."

"One day he tells me he loves me. The next he takes a busty brunette to bed. So don't tell me about loyalty when it comes to Tony Stark." Pepper closed her mouth and just looked at him. She calmed her breathing to prevent herself from crying.

Suddenly something dawned on Rhodey. "Pepper, be honest, please. You're not just with Alex to…" But he didn't need to finish the sentence, Pepper new where he was going. It frightened her. It frightened her to the core. She had tried to convince herself for weeks now, she was in it with Alex for who he was, and not to distract herself from Tony. And Pepper had thought she really were by now. Apparently not so much, when Rhodey was able to look right trough her.

"I really like Alex." She mumbled and looked down, tears filling her eyes.

"But you're not in love with him." Rhodey finished her thought softly. "Pepper." He sight, sadness in his voice. "That's not -"

"No it's not fair." She sighed, sounding defeated, like she was tired of fighting for something she could never have or against something that would happen either way. "It never is, Rhodey. I really like Alex. Being with him is easy, I like being in his presence and I am confident over time I'll be able to fall in love with him. And I don't want to be alone or disappointed any more. He accepts me and my schedule with Tony. And I am not going to apologize for how I'm trying to fix what Tony has broken." The tears hadn't left her eyes, and she still sounded tired, but she looked very determined and before Rhodey could utter a word Pepper finished the topic.  
"Look, I'll tell Tony. Eventually. But for now I am happy. I love being with Alex. For the first time in a long time I feel loved and recognized and I _am_ happy. And I want it to stay this way for a little longer. So let's not fight over this, Jimmy. Not tonight. Okay?"

Pepper looked at him expectantly, a small, a little sad, yet hopeful smile playing her lips. "I'm not here to fight you over this topic either, Pep." Rhodey sighed and moved to wrap her in his arms. "I just think Tony deserves to know. And he deserves to know it from you directly." Rhodey could feel Pepper nodded her ok in his arms. "And I am happy to hear you're happy. I really am. Just please don't break his heart."

Pepper didn't know if the last part was directed at Tony or Alex. Maybe both. Either way one heart would certainly be broken about that. But she didn't want to dwell on that now, not on her birthday.

"Thank you Jimmy." She said and stepped out of his arms. "I think we should rejoin the party."

* * *

Two hours later the party was going better than ever. People had started dancing half an hour ago. Lisa had taken control over the music and had turned up the volume considerably. Pepper had tried to stop her, fearing her conservative neighbors.  
Those had indeed shown up at her doorstep ten minutes later, threatening her with consequences.

Ironically Tony Stark, presenting himself as her knight in a shining armor had shown up surprisingly behind them and charmed them into joying the party, instead of calling the cops.

Pepper was currently looking for Alex. Actually she had been looking for him for the last one and a half hours, but her guests had always stopped her to talk or Lisa had wanted her to dance and after Tony had shown up she was also desperately trying to stay clear of his path.

"What is Tony doing here?" She asked Lisa as she pulled her with her into the bathroom, as Tony entered the hallway as well.

"How would I know? It's your party." Lisa giggled, something she only did when she was drunk. "He looks very good tonight."

"I know that, Lish."

"Ha! See, you admitted it. You should be with him." Lisa slurred.

"I meant I know, that you don't know how he knew about this party." Pepper figured she was way too sober for the whole situation.

"But he is very dreamy…" She zoned out for a second, lost in her drunken thoughts. "Like McDreamy. As in Grey's Anatomy. You remember?" Lisa started laughing and rambling.

"Lisa!" Pepper scolded and snapped her fingers in her direction.

Lisa pouted at Pepper's snapping, looking like a little kid. "Snapping is rude."

"Focus. I don't know how he got here. I didn't send him an invitation. And he never remembers my birthday. Rhodey must have said something." As soon as the words left her lips, Lisa had disappeared and shut the door behind her. Roughly twenty seconds later she reappeared with Rhodey in tow.

"What are we doing in the bathroom?! Togeth… Oh. Hi Pepper. Why are we all in the bathroom?" He asked them, seriously confused.

"Sorry, Jimmy. I don't know either." Pepper excused and turned towards Lisa. "Care to explain?"

"Did or did you not invite Tony?" Lisa looked sternly at Rhodey, yet slurring her words.

"What is this? Court?" Rhodey asked, getting irritated.

"Yes, friendship-court." Lisa said, but Pepper stopped her from harassing Rhodey any further.

"No it's not, Lisa. I was just wondering whether you told Tony about the party. I'm not mad if you did, but…" Her blue eyes looked a little lost and sad and Rhodey smiled warmly at her.

"I didn't, Pepper. Scouts honor. I knew you two aren't exactly on speaking terms, so I didn't tell him. I figured, if you wanted him here you'd invite him."

Pepper smiled in return. "I have to go and find Alex, before he and Tony meet each other. Lisa, come on." And she accompanied her very drunk friend out of the bathroom.

"Oh Will!" She called out as she saw him. "I think your lovely wife needs one or two glasses of water." Pepper handed Lisa to her husband. "Have you seen Alex somewhere? I've been looking for him for forever."

"Yes, a few minutes ago I saw him putting some glasses away into the kitchen. Thank you, Pepper." He answered and Pepper watched him as he sat Lisa down onto a chair and handed her a large glass of water.

Pepper on the other hand collected some empty glasses and bottles herself and hurried toward the kitchen, in hopes of finally finding her boyfriend, who seemed to have vanished off the face of the earth. Unfortunately she wasn't lucky.  
Before Pepper reached the kitchen Tony stepped in her way, blocking her path.

"Good evening, Miss Potts." He said, smiling, his voice smooth as silk, his dark eyes sparkling.

Pepper tried to look cold and stern, but she also immediately noticed that he was sober and his tone and the fact that he seemed to have remembered her birthday on his own made her stomach involuntarily flutter. But then thoughts and pictures of him and a faceless brunette in bed invaded her mind and the flutter stopped immediately.

"What are you doing here, Tony? I don't remember inviting you." Pepper asked him, hands still holding on to the dishes.

"And yet you are relieved I came. After all I speared you a confrontation with the police, Maverick." He replied smugly. Pepper in response rolled her eyes. "I even brought you a present… had Jarvis buy you a present." Tony continued and pulled an elongated square teal colored box with _Tiffany_ written on top from his back pocket, holding it in front of him.

Pepper's eyes went wide as she saw the present and the flutter in her stomach returned. Try as she might she couldn't stop the smile that crept onto her face and the warmth spreading in her body.

"Thank you. I appreciate it." She said and she really meant it.

"Care to dance?" Tony asked her, still holding the present in his hands.

"Uhm sure… Let me just put these away real quick." She held up the glasses and bottles.

Tony was ecstatic, to say the least. He had never thought Pepper would actually welcome him to her party, let alone agree to dance with him there.

"Great! I'll wait in the living room."

After a quick dance with Tony, Pepper learned that Alex had indeed left the party. Phillip from accounting had had way too much to drink and Alex had helped his poor pregnant girlfriend getting him home.  
The later it got the more people eventually left and Pepper started clean up. Tony, Rhodey, Happy and Will were sitting in the living room - actually supposed to clean up there - chatting and emptying the last bottles of beer, while Lisa and Ellis were in the bathroom. Well actually Lisa was throwing up and Ellis had volunteered staying with her.  
As Pepper was loading the last glasses into the dishwasher she heard her front door open and Alex entered the kitchen.

"Phew." He sighed. "I'm sorry B. It took longer than I expected, but Phillip was so out of it…"

"It's ok. I am sorry you missed nearly the whole party." Pepper answered and started washing the glasses, that didn't fit into the dishwasher, turning her back towards her boyfriend.

"Well, now I'm back, nearly everyone else is gone and I think we can have a little party for ourselves." He said in a smoldering tone and walked toward her, putting his hands on her hips, leaning in to lightly kiss her neck.

**WHOMP**.

Before his lips reached her neck, Pepper felt Alex being yanked away. Almost immediately a sharp cry of pain followed. Pepper whipped around and saw Alex doubled over, holding his nose, blood dripping through his fingers onto her marbled floor.

Tony was standing on her other side, shaking his right fist in pain. "Fuck!" He cursed. The other men came running from the living room, inspecting where the noise came from.

"Alex!" Pepper shirked and dropped the sponge, running toward him, grabbing a towel on her way. "Are you ok?"

"No. I think he broke my nose." Alex muffled though his hands. As Pepper handed him the towel he's said "Thank you, honey."

"Honey?" Tony had stopped dead in his cursing. "Honey?! You sick pervert!" He growled and lunged himself at Alex again. Pepper screamed in fear. He also got another punch in, before Rhodey and Happy managed to hold him down.

"What is wrong with you?!" Some of them screamed at him, forcing him back into the living room.

Pepper heard them screaming at each other and hustling from the other room.

"Will, could you stay with Alex for a moment, please? Ice packs are in the freezer." Without waiting for his response, she handed him the towel and left.  
As she entered the living room Rhodey and Happy were still wrestling with Tony, trying to get him to stay on the couch.  
"Enough!" Pepper said loudly. And they all froze. "Tony. Sit." She ordered and he did just that, Rhodey still holding on to him. "Rhodey, leave him be." He obliged without hesitation.  
"What on earth has gotten into you?" Pepper asked calmly, in her best business-non-bullshit tone. No-one would ever mess with her, while using this tone. It meant no bullshit and could be compared to the rattling of a rattle snake. It was a warning.

"Pepper, this… this sick… perve was sneaking up on you. He was putting his dirty paws all over you. It's disgusting to sneak up on a woman like this. And he tried putting his filthy little mouth on you…" he tried explaining angrily. He was so mad he was nearly shouting.

"And you thought it was best to break his nose?" She asked. "And punch him again, after he had stepped back?"

"Pepper this douche is obviously a creep! I haven't seen him here all night, and suddenly he sneaks into your apartment and tries feeling you up." Tony was getting louder with every word, not understanding why he was suddenly the bad guy.

"That's still no reason to punch him." Pepper was getting louder herself.

"Oh so you think it's ok, that some random dude is feeling you up at night in your kitchen -" Pepper caught Rhodey's eye and he cocked his head at her. She had to look away quickly, guilt spreading through her. "- kissing you and trying to… to… to…"

"To what Tony?" Pepper asked, challenging him.

"To fucking seduce you! Don't you see he's such a weirdo! I already knew it at Rhodey's birthday party. He's all bad for you. Only a pervet would sneak up on women like this. It's disgusting! If he ever lay's another hand on you, I will kill him. Actually I might just do this right now!" He was back on his feet again taking a step back toward the kitchen. Before Rhodey and Happy cold move a finger, Pepper already had stepped in is way and one look from her had put him back in his place.

"Tony stop it!" She warned again. "I said it's alright and I meant it."

"Why would any of this be alright?" Tony snapped at her. "He's disgusting. I'm getting sick just thinking about that he had his hand all over you. He -"

But before Tony could finish his ranting and elaborate any further, why his actions had been justified, Pepper cut him off effective, immediately: "He's my boyfriend." She practically screamed at him to cut his shouting.

Ups. That wasn't how she meant to tell him. For a moment they stared at each other wide eyed and in shock. For a spilt second Pepper even wondered if he was going to kiss her, but then his face fell, hurt reflecting in his features. And a millisecond later his eyes turned to stone.

"He's what?" He growled out, shock and anger equally running through his system.

"My boyfriend." Pepper replied quietly, but he still heard her.

"Oh." He said sarcastically, grinning like a mad man now. "I see it now. So you have been serious when you told me there is nothing between us. I see. Funny," But it sounded like it was anything but, funny. "you know, you could have just told me you are with someone instead of lying to my face. I now get why you have been acting so strange these last few month. How long has this been going on for?" His words were like venom to her.

"No, we only started dating a few weeks ago." Pepper admitted, and casted her eyes to the ground.

"Well it didn't take you long to find someone after our kiss. You made up your mind pretty fast then, don't you think. Were you two already fucking at the gala?" She knew he wanted to hurt her and get a rise out of her, and normally it would glide right off her. But this time he hit the bulls eye.

"What?" Pepper was getting angry now.

"Yeah you ran around at the gala, kissing me and a few days later you started hopping in bed with MacGyver over there? Nah, i bet you were fucking back then already. Why else would you have left me hanging that night." He spat at her, intentionally hurting her.

"Man, don't…" Rhodey started from his side, but Tony cut him right off.

"Zip it, Rhodey. I bet you knew about her litte lovers quarrel. And you didn't even say a word. And here I was thinking we were best friends."

"Watch what you're saying, Tony." Pepper warned him, already close to her breaking point.

"Why? Did I hit a nerve?" He challenged his PA.

"Why? Because up until yesterday Alex and I hadn't had a relationship, let alone sex. And as far as I am concerned, I'm not the one who bedded a paramedic in New York City after showing myself off as her personal hero." She spat in his face. "And I am not the one who couldn't keep it in her pants for the last two decades like a freaking horny sixteen year old. I am not the one who can't handle even the slightest rejection, running towards the first woman who's willing to suck my dick, just because my daddy didn't love me. And I am certainly not the one who gave you any clue as to the possibility of a relationship. Grow up." She ground out.

Tony went to say something, but just stood there opening and closing his mouth like a fish. This time it was her, who had hit too close to home. Pepper knew she had pulled all his strings, possibly hurting him real bad. But to be honest she didn't care any more. He had basically called her a whore.

"I think you should leave." Was the last thing she told him before she went to look after her boyfriend, not once looking back at Tony Stark.

"So much for us being invincible." Tony called after her, but she was already gone.

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**I also promise this will be the last chapter, where they are constantly fighting :) It will get better...**


	17. Another me

**This Morning:  
Hey everyone!**

**I know this is not a chapter and thus technically not allowed here. But I let you down and I need to apologize.**

**After reading your comments and your critics I reviewed my story. You are right. I decided to not post new chapters for a while. That doen't mean I'm terminating this Story, though I really thought about it. I'm just as frustrated as you guys are with where I was going...Things got so out of hand here, I don't know if I could still do you all justice and I am sorry I didn't realize it sooner. **

**So I decided to rewrite chapters 17-22. The plot will change, it wont be as slowpaced as before. I don't want to disappoint you guys and I want you to be happy. And you are right, they were very OoC. I'm gonna scratch Tony's relationship with Emily out of the story and it will be more Pepper/Tony centered. Also no more fighting and them growing back together more quickly. You wont have your happy relationship ending right away though, but the progress they'll make to get to gether will be much faster. **

**I'm sorry I let you down. But I heard you and I will try to improve in my new attempt. So please stay with me as I try to make this right for you. I will Update with the new chapter 17 on Monday. I promise. I now just need a little faith and a chance to make it up to you all.**

**Thank you.**

* * *

**_Now:  
_**_**Hello again. I know I'm unnerving you. I unnerve myself, too. **_**_A lot. Anxiety sucks..._**

**_I decided to post 17-22 again, until I decided what to do. Taking them down was an overreaction on my side. And I apologize.  
Though I still don't know/think I'm going to continue this exact plot after Ch. 22. At the moment I feel like I just _****_can't. It's not the reviewers fault!  
_****_My problem is I wrote chapter 23 and 24 already (thats why I have a sneak) and I hated them and rewrote them two times already and still hate them. I feel like I'm stuck, and then people said they got frustrated and discontinue reading and honestly, I realized I am frustrated with the plot too, that's why it didn't work out anymore. I feel like I'm in too deep to get them out again and I hate that. It's like I created the problem, than it got out of hand and now I don't know how to fix it. I'm just... I dunno sad. But not because of your reviews. I know what I want to tell, but I somehow can't. Maybe I'll post the rewrites as sort of a "what/if" spin off. I don't know anymore. For now, you'll get chapter 17-22 back. _**

**_And to make one thing clear, I always have two (unpolished) chapters in my pipeline and every time I update, it's after I wrote a new one. Before I post a new chapter it will get a major walkthrough and sometimes I even rewrite most/big parts. Otherwise the sneaks wouldn't be possible. So yes, I said I wont write until after __Christmas, and that meant: I won't touch 23, 24 until then again, but the main part and plot is already written. _****_Also I didnt want to start on 25 until after Christmas, which has to be written before I put 23 out. _****_But I am unhappy how they turned out, still I included the sneak peak. But like I said, I totally got the reviews and figured out why I hated 23 and 24 so much. It's like a knot I can't untangle... If I have a major breakthrough over Christmas I'll let you know. But the more I think about it, I think I'll rewrite the chapters. Until then I'm giving you the old ones back. But For now I need a little time and space to think..._**

**_But one thing: I wanted to thank you to everyone who believes in me and who reviewed, whether it was criticism or cheering me on. I'm not mad at anyone, I am just... stuck. and unhappy with my writing. and lost. mostly lost, I guess :'D_**

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**Chapter 17: Another me**

**You guys, I am overwhelmed with the responses. You really help me believe in myself and my writing abilities. Thats also why I'm updating a day early. **

**I know this chapter won't contribute much to the actual plot and is more of a recap, but I added a little pepperony as a thank you for your support.**

**WARNING: I know Tony is thinking some harsh words about Pepper here, but remember, he's hurt, angry and tends to lash out when that happens. Also I am actually on Peppers side at the moment and still think her words in the last chapter were justified, but I am trying show the story from different angles, and that includes Tony's unjustified rage at her.**

**As always no beta. All mistakes are on me.**

**Song: Another me by the Cab**

* * *

**Another me**

Drops ran down his face, and to be honest, he didn't knew if it was just the rain streaming down his face or if he actually was crying.  
But why would he be crying anyways? Because Pepper had pushed all his buttons? Because she had used all his weaknesses against him, only to render him speechless? Because his dad really didn't love him?

No, he knew better. His dad had loved him. Granted he had never shown or told him and had shipped him off to boarding school as soon as he had the chance. He had never shown any interest in him, except when it included science and innovation, but he had given him one of the biggest presents he could have ever asked for: his life. And he had given it to him not once, but twice. The more Tony thought about it, the more he realized his father had been terrible at being a parent and not terrible at being a human. Maybe he hadn't liked kids, maybe he couldn't just been bothered with them, but since he had seen the dated footage, Tony knew his dad had loved him.

So why did it hurt him, when Pepper had said that? It had hurt, because up until today he had assumed Pepper to be the loyal person he thought she was. Apparently all masks had come down now. Like he had tried manipulating her month ago, something he had sworn he'd never do, she now had used his weakest spots against him, something he had never thought she was capable of.

Still he wondered when she had become so ugly on the inside, when had she become this disgusting type of woman. She wasn't better than any other shallow bimbos out there, looking for a quick lay, not caring about his feelings.

He sighed and wiped over his face. Tony knew is thoughts were too rough. Pepper wasn't a whore by any means, and she was as far ugly as anyone could be. But she had hurt him. When she had cut him, she had cut him deep. And he almost felt like he didn't recognize her anymore. Like she was stranger…  
He thought he had known her better, but she had changed so much since she was with this Alex guy.

"JARVIS, turn up my music." Tony barked, as he entered the shop. He threw his leather jacket on his couch. Before he started working on his hot rod to take his mind off his redheaded ex-assistant, he wiped his fridge clean with his arm, making the items scatter around the floor, until he found what he was looking for in the far back: bourbon. Tony forewent the glass and took a swig straight from the bottle, taking it with him to his work station.

Under his screwdriver he found a receipt from a few weeks ago. "3 x bouquet, red roses, XL. 1 x Belgium chocolate." it read.

Tony crunched up the paper and threw it across the room. Angry at himself and his stupidity he took another swig. He had seen the flowers in her trash can and the chocolate that had remained untouched. And yet he had believed, she actually would give im a chance. Stupid him…  
"Fool me twice, shame on me? Or how did the saying go?" He asked his empty workshop.

"I believe you mean: Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice shame on you. Sir." JARVIS replied out of nowhere.

"You know, I wasn't actually talking to you JARVIS." Tony barked at his AI.

Still not sufficient with the little damage the paper receipt caused, Tony smashed his screwdriver into the table, making it stick in there.

With a huff he lay down under the old timer, but he realized quickly it was no use. He couldn't concentrate. At least not on work. He was so mad. So mad at himself and at Alex, that creepy douche bag. But mostly he was mad at Pepper and how she had treated and lied to him.

Somehow the last few month started repeating before his eyes. Every bottled up emotion, every little fraction of frustration and and every pent up bit of hurt - and longing for her - tore its way to his surface. And the alcohol did the rest, enraging him even further.  
Tony remembered how she had figured out he was in love with her. She had figured it out, before he himself had come to terms with this fact. And immediately she had shut him down. Telling him about how she just wanted to be friends and how they were invincible as friends.  
Telling the person who's in love with you, you want to stay friends was like telling someone his dog died, but he's allowed to keep it. Pure non-sens.

And invincibility… Well, they had fought so much about their relationship this last few month… And she had taken it all and thrown it out the window. Now they seemed to have really spoiled it. So much for their friendship being invincible.  
Uhhhg… He was sick of thinking and repeating this word over and over: Invincible. What a stupid word anyways…

He took another swig from the bottle and suddenly pictures invaded his mind making him stop in his tracks, just staring into the void. Tony remembered Pepper sitting on is couch in yoga pants and one of his shirts. It had been one of the most adorable sights he had ever seen. He would trade her everyday business suits for her laid back Yoga pants and his baggy shirt anytime.  
That evening they had talked for hours and Tony really had had the feeling he was getting to know her. That evening she had let down her guard for him and what he had seen had been more beautiful than everything he had seen in her before and she had made him fall even deeper for her.  
Pepper didn't know it, but after he had carried her to her bed in his or better her guest room he hadn't been able to resist.

* * *

_Pepper had been asleep for nearly fifteen minutes in his lap. Tony was sure she was cold out by now, so she wouldn't wake when he carried her to bed. After her horrible day she deserved to sleep and not be woken again by transferring her to bed. _

_As he arrived with her in his arms in the room he had dubbed as her room by now, JARVIS opened the door for him. _

_"__J, lights to 15%." Tony whispered into the darkness and the dimmed lights came up. _

_Carefully Tony placed Pepper on the large bed. Luckily her yoga pants and his loose shirt seemed comfortable enough for her to sleep in, so he didn't need to change her into something more suitable.  
__Tony managed to wrangle the comforter from underneath her small body and tuck her in. He was already halfway out the door when he heard her mumble in her sleep. "Thank you, Tony." _

_Her eyes were closed and her features relaxed in sleep. He wondered what she was dreaming about, but it made his stomach all fluttery and warm that she was dreaming about him at all. _

_Before he knew what his legs were doing he was back at her bed, climbing in next to her. He lay on his side and lightly tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ears, his fingers brushing her cheek in the process. Pepper sighed in content in her sleep and snuggled further into her pillow.  
__Her subconsciousness made her reach for his hand, grabbing it in her sleep.  
__Not wanting to wake her Tony settled in next to her, holding her hand in return and putting one his other arm around her ribcage. Within minutes he was out like a light. _

_As Tony woke the sun had already risen over the ocean. He blinked a couple of times, only slowly remembering where he was and who he was with. After a few seconds he noticed they had shifted in their sleep. Pepper's back was now pressed into his front and he still had his arm around her waist. As he inhaled he could smell Pepper's hair, her shampoo, and the soap she used, as well as a lingering trace of her perfume. Underlying all these artificial smells was something unique, a smell he had never consciously sensed before. _

_In this moment he knew in his heart, that he never wanted to go another day without waking up to that smell. Her smell.  
__It was absolutely intoxicating. Tony closed his eyes, fully intent of dozing off for a little while longer.  
__But suddenly Pepper shifted in her sleep, turning around to him, she placed her hand around his waist and her head onto his chest, basically snuggling him._

_He was worried that his suddenly very rapid and loud heartbeat would wake her, since her ear was pressed to his chest. Her waking up was something he wanted to prevent for as long as possible, too afraid to send her running, so he started rubbing her back and hair soothingly.  
__It seemed to work as Pepper's breathing deepened and she let out a contended little hum. _

_They lay in this position for several minutes, Tony stroking her back and dozing off, relishing in how it felt like, to finally hold her in his arms.  
__And she looked so peaceful in her sleep. Relaxed and contend. She was even more beautiful now than on an everyday basis, because she didn't look like she was carrying the weight of the world. Tony knew he put a lot of stress on her and even more in last year. He was still guilty about the way he had treated her at his party and in general, and still, to this day he had no idea how to tell the woman he was madly in love with that he had been dying. _

_The way she had looked at him the night of his party, the hurt in her eyes when he had told her he loved her. She hadn't believed him then and he couldn't blame her one bit. Yet it had been that moment he was finally certain there was hope for him. That the night at the fire fighter benefit, when he had left her, hadn't only been frustration and relief on her part, that he had come back from the dead. She actually had feelings for him. He only needed to make her believe he feels the same._

_"__I do, Peps." He whispered into her hair and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I lo-"_

_"__Sir, Colonel Rhodes is calling." JARVIS spoke up quietly. As a result to the small noise Pepper shifted again and turned away from him again, leaving his embrace. "He needs your guidance regarding the Mark II." JARVIS continued. Tony closed his eyes briefly, cursing Rhodey and JARVIS in his mind and left the bed quietly._

* * *

When Tony resurfaced from the memory he noticed he was actually smiling. He didn't want to admit it, but he misses her, despite everything that had happened. And it couldn't have all been just in his mind, could it?

He couldn't be so foolish. He doubted very much he only imagined Pepper's feelings for him. He also remembered them dancing at Rhodey's party and the way she had looked at him, before Happy had snatched her away. The way she had nearly lost it when he had left with this girl during spin the bottle. He didn't even remember her name.

* * *

_"__Toooony…" Tanice pouted at him. "It's already been 5 minutes. I thought you were supposed to have your wild way with me." She came closer again and traced her fingers down his chest, nearing his fly, while she rose on her tiptoes and crooking her head, leaning in. _

_For the second time in 5 minutes he gently caught her hand and pushed her away.  
__"__Tanja," he said with a sigh. "I already told you. We're just he to refill our drinks." _

_"__My name ist Tanice…" She scolded him. _

_"__What ever." Mumbled Tony into his drink. _

_"__But we're supposed to at least make out." She whined again. "I know you have the hots for this Pepper girl…"  
__A least she's observant, Tony thought to himself. And she had a point. Pepper had been flirting with Alex the entire evening, right in front of him. And no matter what he had done he hadn't been able to get a proper reaction out of her. She was like medusa. Stone cold. Nothing affected her and she had the nerve to obviously flirt with a guy while he was sitting opposite of her.  
__"… __we can make her jealous." The girl grinned at him. "Stark? Are you even listening?"_

_"__I'm sorry, what?" Tony asked. He indeed had zoned out on her rambling. _

_"__I said we should make the ginger jealous." Tanice came closer again, and took the glass from his hands, putting it aside. _

_Maybe it was the numerous bourbons that were speaking for him, maybe it was pent up hurt and anger at Pepper, but honestly it felt like it was mostly desperation to finally get an answer out of his former assistant, which made him surge forward and kiss the brunette. _

_And the moment he stepped back into the living room and saw Pepper's reaction, as well as the way Pepper couldn't move a muscle when the bottle pointed at her, showed him it had been the right decision. _

_"Suit yourself, Hap. Ellis, you ok with that? On the other hand I think with Miss Buttoned-Up over here you have nothing to worry about." Again probably the alcohol talking, but it was out before he could stop himself. And then he saw her eyes. Only for a brief second they flickered to his as she left the room. And he knew what he had done with Tanice had been anything but the right thing. It was written all over Pepper's face. He had never been more disgusted with himself than in this moment._

_But then she had the nerve to get touchy with the other guy while looking at him and vetoed her kiss. And Tony saw red. She was his, only his and she definitely did not belong to this Alex…_

* * *

Well, unfortunately now it seemed like she sort of did belong to someone else.  
Maybe it had been that night he had lost her for good, he thought bitterly.

"Sir, you are bleeding." JARVIS informed him.

As Tony looked down he noticed his hand was indeed bleeding heavily. He had broken the bottle he had been holding and apparently cut himself.  
Marching over to his first aid kit, Tony ordered Dummy to clean up the shattered glass and spilled liquor. As he opened it he noticed it was quite empty.

* * *

_"__Tony, will you remember on your own to restock the supplies in the first aid kit or will I have to remind you?" Pepper asked him, while she threw the empty tissue, bandaid and cottony wipe containers into the trash. _

_"__I will have JARVIS reorder everything by tomorrow." Tony answered her as he was putting his wife beater on. _

_His last mission had been pretty easy, he had helped evacuating a small village in __Japan, which__ had been hit by an earthquake. But the last people who had to be rescued had been too stubborn to leave their belongings behind and just get to safety. Tony had managed to get everyone out in time, but the house had been to fragile already and had collapsed on top of him as he scoured the premises to see if he had left anyone behind. _

_That resulted in a few pretty bad gushes und cuts all along his back side. _

_Pepper had helped cleaning him up, but they ran out of cotton swipes and bandaids along the way._

_"__Have you thought about my invitation?" He asked her warily, busying himself with something on his desk, deliberately not looking at her, too afraid to to get a no. _

_"__What invitation?" Pepper asked, and he looked up at her, seeing a small, albeit knowing smile playing her lips and he knew she was just playing along, trying to get a rise out of him. _

_"__Oh… you know the one I left with your car. Along with my credit card." Pepper just continued staring at him expectantly, feigning she had no clue what he was talking about. "The one for the fundraiser…" Tony continued, actually getting unsure of himself now. Gosh she had her way of doing this kind of things to him. He was Tony Stark, he could walk straight into any bar and get any girl there, whether they were in a relationship or not. But Pepper had the power to make him doubt himself with everything, even when it was about a small paper envelope. _

_"__Oh, that one." Pepper laughed, as he blew a small sigh of relief. "Yeah, I found it." And she left him hanging there again._

_"__And…?" Tony asked. _

_"__I'd love to accompany you, Tony." She said, and this time her smile was a genuine one. _

_"__Oh, really?" He was actually a little surprised. _

_"__Yes, I didn't buy a new dress for nothing, Tony." She laughed and collected her paperwork, turning to leave the workshop. _

_"__Is it as tasteful than the last one I bought you?" He asked smugly. _

_"__When did you buy me…" She started, but soon realized he meant the blue one she bought for her birthday and smiled at him. "I won't tell you about the dress. You'll have to see for yourself." _

_Deciding to press a little further, Tony moved forward. "But how are we supposed to color-coordinate then? People need to see we belong together. CEO and company president? A match made in heaven." _

_"__But then it wouldn't be surprise now, would it?" She winked and moved towards the door. _

_"__But we should at least be a little compatible." He tried again._

_"__I'll let Jonas know." She just called over her shoulder._

_"__At least tell me when I shall pick you up?" He called after her. _

_"__I'll let Jonas know." And the door clicked behind her._

* * *

She had looked breathtakingly in her dress, and the memory of how sure and happy she had looked at him as they stood at the roof brought tears to his eyes.

In his many sleepless nights Tony recalled the way her body had felt against his those nights, when the lay in her bed, as they were pressed up again each other in the closet at Rhodey's, as they stood on the balcony and how kissing her had felt like life's breath. And on the rare occasions he actually slept, she came to his dreams. He dreamt she had returned to him that night, and after he had kissed her she would smile at him, instead of crying, take his hand and go home with him, to never leave again.

And now she had a freaking boyfriend. Tony had known he might have overstepped a boundary as he pretended to go missing again. But at that time it seemed, making her desperate for him and showing what she was missing was the only way to make her see, that being separated was the stupidest decision she had ever made.

Yet, it had all gone down from this point.  
Never had she ever looked at him with so much hatred and disgust as in the moment she had told him he wasn't in love with her, that he couldn't be in love with her.  
_Maybe I'm really not able to love_… He thought to himself.  
Actually his last thought wasn't true, there had been one other time, when she had looked at him like that. _It had been tonight. When she had scolded me for sleeping with Emily. _He thought bitterly.

"YOU'RE A FUCKING HYPOCRITE, PEPPER!" He screamed at his empty workshop. He was so angry, he took the next thing he could reach and threw it across the room, not even looking what it was and where it went, but he heard it colliding with the wall and the satisfying shatter of glass and metal.

She had told him they couldn't be together.  
She had shot HIM down again and again, not even giving him a chance.  
She had told him to move on.  
She had told him as friends they would be invincible.  
She had been avoiding him for weeks, now.  
She had been screwing around with another guy for month!

And the one time he slept with another girl, the first time he had a one night stand in nearly a year, suddenly he was the asshole?! No. Pepper thought he was incapable of being in a relationship? That he was incapable of loving someone? No, he was going to show her he was capable. And he was going to show her what she had lost for good. And he was going to make her regret. He was going to become the man she always wanted him to be, but not for her to have.

She wanted him to move on and get over her? Done.  
She wanted him to grow up? Fine.  
She wanted him to change and become a responsible human being? He would do that. But not for her. Not anymore.

Checking the watch at his computer screen Tony dialed the number, JARVIS had looked up for him two weeks ago.  
"Hi this is Emily, who's speaking?" Came the female voice over the phone.

"Hi Emily, this is Tony. Stark. Uhm… I'm sorry to call so late… or early for the matter…" He said awkwardly. He had never done something like this. Getting back with a girl he had slept with.

There was laughing at the other side of the line. "Well, well, look who's calling. Give me a minute Stark, I need to step outside." He heard her walking and a door opening and closing. Typical New York noises like sirens and car horns were heard in the background.  
"This is better," she mumbled more to herself than him. "How did you get my number, I didn't recall leaving it for you." She asked, but sounded bemused.

"I have my ways." Tony responded and felt himself relaxing. "There are perks to being a billionaire, genius and superhero. Listen, what would you say about a vacation? Two weeks ago, you housed me. I'd like to return the favor."

"Tony, I have a job." She sighed. "Not everyone is a billionaire and CEO of a fortune 500 company."

"I will arrange everything." He responded and started typing away on his computer.

"I just can't drop everythi- Hold on a second, I got an email." Tony heard her typing on her phone a hustling in the distance.  
"Apparently my boss just decided to give me vacation time for the next two and a half weeks… Out of the blue. You don't happen to know anything about that?" She asked curiously, but Tony didn't miss that she also sounded a bit ticked off.

"Look I just wanted to repay you for letting me shower at you place and stay the night." He told her. Before she could say anything else, he continued: "You should've just received another email with a gate number and departure time for my privat jet from JFK."

Suddenly Emily sounded excited. "Wait? I'm flying with your privat jet? Why hadn't you said so from the start? That's so cool!"

"So you're coming?" He asked her, and chuckled a little at her excitement.

"I have never flown in an airplane before! And a private jet? California here I come!" She squealed.

"Great, Happy, my driver, will pick you up at the airplane and bring you here. Thank you for coming, Ems."

After they bid their goodbyes and good nights, Tony hung up.  
He was happy Emily was coming. He could use some distraction and her lightheartedness.  
Now he just had to let Pepper know.  
"JARVIS, sent Pepper an automated message, I'll be having company over, starting tomorrow for the next two weeks. And make dummy clean up the mess would ya?"

She said he was an asshole. Maybe that was true. But you know what they say: I became the monster you wanted me to be. Pepper had made her bed, now she had to lay in it.  
Finally being able to get some work done Tony opened his latest file and started dissembling the hot rod.

Dummy grabbed the broom again, and started sweeping the shattered glass casing together. After the shards were gone he carefully picked up the glowing device, that was placed in the middle of a metal hoop and slowly wizzed away with it, wondering what the encryption meant. _Proof that Tony Stark has a heart._

* * *

**Sneak peak for next week: **

Pepper snapped out of her shock and looked down at Tony's face. His lips were already turning blue and his face was wet.  
"No! No. Oh my god! He's not breathing." Pepper was shrieking now, panic evident. "And he's wet. Why is he wet?" She asked, not able to think straight.

"You are crying, Miss Potts." The younger engineer explained gently.

**Ok honestly, please don't hate me too much. I tried to incorporate at least a little Pepperony in the flashbacks.  
I think you figured out by now what Phase III will be about. Good old outdating, a fanfiction classic. Or wont it be? You'll just have to see for yourselves.  
At least I can promise the chapter after the next one, chapter 19 (Its already sitting on my desktop, chapter 18 not so much) will be a giant flashback with lots of pepperony ****vibes, and it will be the kick off for them slowly finding their way back together. **

**So please leave me a review. I will see you next Monday! **


	18. Without you

**This Morning:  
Hey everyone!**

**I know this is not a chapter and thus technically not allowed here. But I let you down and I need to apologize.**

**After reading your comments and your critics I reviewed my story. You are right. I decided to not post new chapters for a while. That doen't mean I'm terminating this Story, though I really thought about it. I'm just as frustrated as you guys are with where I was going...Things got so out of hand here, I don't know if I could still do you all justice and I am sorry I didn't realize it sooner. **

**So I decided to rewrite chapters 17-22. The plot will change, it wont be as slowpaced as before. I don't want to disappoint you guys and I want you to be happy. And you are right, they were very OoC. I'm gonna scratch Tony's relationship with Emily out of the story and it will be more Pepper/Tony centered. Also no more fighting and them growing back together more quickly. You wont have your happy relationship ending right away though, but the progress they'll make to get to gether will be much faster. **

**I'm sorry I let you down. But I heard you and I will try to improve in my new attempt. So please stay with me as I try to make this right for you. I will Update with the new chapter 17 on Monday. I promise. I now just need a little faith and a chance to make it up to you all.**

**Thank you.**

* * *

**_Now:  
_**_**Hello again. I know I'm unnerving you. I unnerve myself, too. **_**_A lot. Anxiety sucks..._**

**_I decided to post 17-22 again, until I decided what to do. Taking them down was an overreaction on my side. And I apologize.  
Though I still don't know/think I'm going to continue this exact plot after Ch. 22. At the moment I feel like I just _****_can't. It's not the reviewers fault!  
_****_My problem is I wrote chapter 23 and 24 already (thats why I have a sneak) and I hated them and rewrote them two times already and still hate them. I feel like I'm stuck, and then people said they got frustrated and discontinue reading and honestly, I realized I am frustrated with the plot too, that's why it didn't work out anymore. I feel like I'm in too deep to get them out again and I hate that. It's like I created the problem, than it got out of hand and now I don't know how to fix it. I'm just... I dunno sad. But not because of your reviews. I know what I want to tell, but I somehow can't. Maybe I'll post the rewrites as sort of a "what/if" spin off. I don't know anymore. For now, you'll get chapter 17-22 back. _**

**_And to make one thing clear, I always have two (unpolished) chapters in my pipeline and every time I update, it's after I wrote a new one. Before I post a new chapter it will get a major walkthrough and sometimes I even rewrite most/big parts. Otherwise the sneaks wouldn't be possible. So yes, I said I wont write until after __Christmas, and that meant: I won't touch 23, 24 until then again, but the main part and plot is already written. _****_Also I didnt want to start on 25 until after Christmas, which has to be written before I put 23 out. _****_But I am unhappy how they turned out, still I included the sneak peak. But like I said, I totally got the reviews and figured out why I hated 23 and 24 so much. It's like a knot I can't untangle... If I have a major breakthrough over Christmas I'll let you know. But the more I think about it, I think I'll rewrite the chapters. Until then I'm giving you the old ones back. But For now I need a little time and space to think..._**

**_But one thing: I wanted to thank you to everyone who believes in me and who reviewed, whether it was criticism or cheering me on. I'm not mad at anyone, I am just... stuck. and unhappy with my writing. and lost. mostly lost, I guess :'D_**

* * *

**Chapter 18: Without you**

**Good evening you guys. The update is finally here. I am so grateful and I can't thank you enough for all your reviews!  
****But I have slightly bad news for you as well: Next week I will probably not update on Monday, but Tuesday, cause it's my moms birthday on Monday.**

**Prepare for drama in this one. Although I want to put out a disclaimer: I have no medical background whatsoever. All my medical knowledge comes from Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice and Wikipedia. So this might be very incorrect. **

**As always I can't wait to read your ****reviews!**

**So buckle up and happy reading.**

**Song: Without you by David Guetta**

* * *

**Without you**

Pepper sat at her desk at Stark Industries filling in some paperwork Jonas had brought her earlier.

"Is Tony still on vacation with his…" Pepper had gulped. She couldn't bring herself to say the word. "Guest." She had then concluded.

"No, Ma'am. He and Miss Nisan returned yesterday evening." Jonas had answered and Pepper's head had snapped up.

"Oh, oh. That's good. I hope his vacation had been fun." She had said and desperately had tried to sound diplomatic.

"Yes, Miss Potts, I guess so. Actually Mr. Stark had instructed me to inform you, he will be coming to the office today." At that Pepper had only blinked at him in surprise. She hadn't had seen Tony since her birthday, when he had decided to punch her boyfriend. The last she had heard from him had been when he had told her he was taking a vacation with Emily. His one night stand. Pardon me, his girlfriend.  
To be honest, every time Pepper had thought about this word a sour and foul taste had settled in her mouth and she had felt like puking.

"He will be here at around noon." Jonas had continued when Pepper had just continued staring at him with blank expression, while nervously shuffling with his feet.

When Pepper had finally found her voice again, she hadn't known what to say, so she had settled for busying herself again and just replying "Thank you Jonas."

"Will that be all, Miss Potts?" Jonas had asked. It had been odd being at the receiving end of the question, instead of being the one asking it.

"That will be all, Jonas. I guess I'll see you at noon."

Now noon was nearing rapidly and although she feared seeing Tony after his vacation and she was still mad at him for throwing a fight, she had missed him.  
He had been her best friend once, after all and for most of the 12 years they had spent together they got along very well. Thinking back it felt like he had said nearly a year ago, they completed each other. If someone had told her back then, they would be constantly at each other throats now, she would have laughed it off.  
With a sigh Pepper continued finishing the documents in front of her and tried concentrating at the work at hand.

"Miss Potts, Mr. Stark just entered his office and would like to speak to you." Jonas suddenly said over the intercom.

That was a bad sign, normally Tony would have just strut by her office and tried to distract her as much as possible, just to unnerve her.  
It meant, that he was still avoiding her.  
But actually Pepper couldn't blame him. She had avoided too him after she started dating Alex and she figured he might still be mad at her for not telling him about her boyfriend.

"You wanted to see me?" Pepper asked as she entered his office after knocking thrice. Tony sat in his chair, but had his back turned towards her, enjoying his sight out of the window.

"Yeah, hold on a second." He said, and turned toward her, pointing to his bluetooth earpiece. Apparently the statement wasn't meant for Pepper, but for the person at the other side of the call. "Can you give me another second? I'm still on the line with Emily. She just landed in New York." He explained and watched her reaction carefully.

"Do you want me to come back later?" Pepper asked, and managed with a great deal of willpower to do so unfazed and sound matter-of-factly.

"No you can stay, it will only take a second." Tony said and turned away, resuming his call. "Listen Hon,"  
_Great they already have pet names,_ Pepper thought to herself and was grateful he couldn't see her rolling her eyes, with his back turned to her.  
"I have a meeting with Pepper now, I'll call you later. Yeah I miss you, too. Yeah, I'll call you later." After he was finished he turned back around toward Pepper. "Sorry, I just wanted to make sure she got home safe." He explained.

"I see." Pepper responded. "How was your vacation?" She asked carefully, not sure whether she was crossing a line that seemed to have appeared since... Actually she didn't know when it had appeared, but it was certainly there.

"Oh it was great. The first week we spent here in Malibu and LA, can you believe she had never left New York?" He asked and Pepper marveled at how happy he sounded, yet there still was a trace of hatred or angriness toward her left in his voice.

"No, Tony I had no idea. Maybe because I had no idea you had invited her over." She didn't mean to sound so harsh, but it just unnerved her that he behaved like nothing had changed between them. Like they were still friends.  
Her heart sank when she realized she didn't consider him a friend anymore. But too much had happened between them. Too much glass had been broken.

"Anyways, we took the yacht to Avalon and spent a week there. Unfortunately Emily has to return to work today." He concluded before she could say anything else.

"I'm glad you two had a nice vacation, Tony." Pepper tried to sound happy for him, but she just couldn't bring herself to give him more than a half hearted smile. "Forgive me Tony, but why did you come here today? I doubt it was because you wanted to give me a travel report." Her schedule was full for the day and honestly she wanted get out of there. She felt like his two week absence hadn't changed anything between them. And she wasn't sure wether she felt like throttling him or crying for what they lost. Maybe both. But she was too proud to show any reaction. They were like two kids silently sulking in separate rooms.

"No, I actually came here to ask you to clean out the guest room - your room - in my house." He looked at her without even blinking, taking in her every reaction.

She had thought about anything he could have called her for. Hell she even suspected he had gotten this girl pregnant on their vacation and now he needed her help getting rid of her. But that she hadn't expected and her brain had trouble keeping up with her mouth.  
"Uhm sure. But may I ask why?" She asked, and she had a nagging suspicion she wouldn't like his answer.

"I need more closet space, and your room is closest to mine." He answered, but averted his eyes, not able to look at her any longer, while asking her to move from his life. And she knew he wasn't upfront with her, because she actually had chosen the room farthest from his.

"Tony, look at me." She demanded and he did, he could never resist her PA-voice, she had even managed to get him to go to the most boring meetings with this voice. Though when he did look at her, she was greeted with a reflection of determination and coldness, yet a flicker of longing and hurt lay visible underneath.  
"Be honest, please." She asked, dreading the answer.

"Emily is moving in with me." He stated without beating around the bush.

Pepper felt like crying and screaming and throttling him all at the same time.

"Are you sure about this?" She asked curtly, not able to look at him any longer so she opted to look out the window.

"Yes. She's great and will be transferred to a hospital downtown LA as a paramedic."

"Don't you think you're moving this… relationship thing a little too fast?" She asked warily and dreaded herself for feeling threatened by this situation.

"Honestly Pepper, I don't think this any of your business anymore. But just to calm your nerves, no I don't think we're moving this along too fast. She's a great girl, I like her very much, we have fun. Why bother waiting?" The indifference and coldness in his voice hit Pepper right in the feelings. When she went to say something he stopped her. "Pepper, look I don't want to drag this on for longer than necessary. Please just stop by some time this week and get your things. Or I can have Jonas pack your stuff and bring it over. It's your call." He looked at her and waited for her to answer.

"I will take a look in my schedule and tell you when I'll by stopping by." She just answered and went to leave, when he stopped her.

"Pepper, wait there is one more thing. I have a budget meeting with R'n'D later. For the New York building. It would be nice if the CEO would join us. It's your project, as much as it is mine." Still, he didn't look at her, busying himself with his glass phone. His tone all business and neutral like she had never heard before.

"Will that be all, Mr. Stark?" Her usual phrase was like a peace offering to him.

"Hey Em's. Sorry for the interruption. Yeah, I organized everything and…" He was already calling his girlfriend again, not even bothering with his reply.

_So much for us being invincible,_ Pepper thought as she left his office. She had never went back to her own office faster, shutting the door behind her. She felt her chin quivering as tears started streaming down her face. This wasn't right. None of it.

* * *

Two hour later she stood in the R'n'D department taking notes on her clipboard, asking a question now and then, looking at the new prototypes. Tony ignored her for the most part, asked questions himself and put in some ideas of his own.

"Ok, now Miss Potts only has to approve of the budgeting." Oliver, a senior developer said and looked hopefully over at Pepper.

"I actually have a few more questions at first, Oliver." Pepper answered and started asking him about benefits and potential for improvement to make it even more self sustainable.

While Pepper and the engineer continued talking and going over the models again, Tony coughed rather heavily.

"Mr. Stark, are you alright?" One of the junior engineers asked. "Do you need a glass of water?"

"No, no. It's nothing I'm…" He coughed again, even strongly this time. "I'm fine. I portably swallowed the wrong way."

He noticed the way Pepper threw a worried look over at him, but continued her discussion with Oliver.

Suddenly he felt his chest tighten, it felt like all the air was pressed from his lungs and he couldn't breathe. He felt like he was suffocating. He couldn't breathe. Except he could, but it felt like no air was reaching his lungs. Panic rose in his chest. Tony started panting and doubling over, trying desperately to fill his lungs with air, but it didn't work. Tony saw Pepper and the two engineers running towards him and saw them talking to him, but the blood rushed so heavily in his ears he wasn't able to hear them. Then he felt himself starting to sway, the world was spinning around him, turning dark. He felt cold. His hands had started sweating but were cold, cold and sweaty at the same time.  
Help. He needed help. "Pep…" He cocked out but she was already by his side, her face filled with worry, though from what he could see she was trying to calm him down, hushing to him. But it was no use, he couldn't breath, his legs gave way and everything around him faded and turned black.

* * *

Pepper had heard Tony's cough, but hadn't thought of it any further until he had started swaying. Then she noticed his breathing had accelerated rapidly and he had been almost panting.

"Tony?" She had asked. "Mr. Stark?" Oliver and the junior engineer had asked, but Tony hadn't responded. Then his eyes had turned inside his skull and she had heard him rasping her before he had collapsed on the floor.

"Tony! Breath. It's alright, just breath." But then he had fallen. "Oh my god." She screamed and rushed to his side, cradling his head in her lap. "Someone call 9-1-1! He has a heart attack!"

But Oliver had his phone already out and was giving the paramedics the needed information. "Miss Potts, is he breathing?" He demanded, but Pepper could only look at him dumbfounded, blood rushing in her ears now as well. "Miss Potts!" The senior engineer barked at her. "Is. He. Breathing?!"

Pepper snapped out of her shock and looked down at Tony's face. His lips were already turning blue and his face was wet.  
"No! No. Oh my god! He's not breathing." Pepper was shrieking now, panic evident. "And he's wet. Why is he wet? Oh god, why is his face all wet?!" She asked, not able to think straight.

"You are crying, Miss Potts." The younger engineer explained gently.

Crying? She hadn't even noticed she was crying. "We need to start chest compressions now. Or he'll die." She said, and practically felt her soul leaving her body. Now she had to function. For his sake. Like she had those month ago when she blew up the arc reactor. _Don't think_, he had told her month ago and now she had to live by it.

"I have never done that before, but I learned it in high school." The younger one offered and moved toward his chest.

"No." Pepper stopped him, put down his head onto her jacked and ripped his dress shirt open. "I'll start. You watch. I just had a first responder training. When I get tired, we switch." Pepper instructed and put her hands on his sternum, pressing down, mentally humming the Imperial March to herself to get to a 120 BPM frequency.  
Pepper felt his ribs cracking underneath her hands, and although feeling his ribs breaking because of her hands, was a feeling that made her want to throw up, she knew she was doing it right.

"Stop! You are breaking his ribs." The young developer said in shock and reached for her hands.

"No!" She barked at him, swatting his hands away.

"You are harming him!" He tried to reason.

"Breaking his ribs can happen, while doing CPR! If you can't handle that, leave. I am only trying to save his life." When she reached count 45 she pressed his chin up and head back, and breathed into his mouth two times. The moment she touched his lips memories tried to force their way into her mind, but she had to push them aside. Yes this was Tony and his lips felt marvelous, but she was also trying to save his live. She had no time for some movie revelation bullshit, when the damsel in distress realizes she loves the hero when she gets the kiss of life. This was real and she had to focus on saving his life.

"Ambulance is on his way. 10 minutes tops." Oliver informed and rushed to her side, taking over from her, pumping his heart.

Finally the paramedics arrived. They strapped Tony onto a stretcher and put a machine over his torso, that handled chest compressions for them.

"Will anybody accompany him to -" One of the paramedics wanted to ask, but Pepper beat him to it.

"I'll ride with him, if that's possible. I also know about his medical history." She looked at the paramedics and they instantly knew, they couldn't deny her request, at least not if they wanted to forego a serious fight.

"Alright, we're getting him to St. Ambrose if you want to inform anyone."

* * *

"Pepper, what happened?" Happy asked as he arrived at the hospital half an hour later.

"I don't know yet, Happy." She looked at him and accepted the coffee he was handing her gratefully. "He just collapsed." Her tone was flat, almost emotionless, but Happy knew better. She was trying to hold herself together, for her and his sake. "His heart stopped beating…" She coked at her own words a little, but managed to continue. "I broke his rips." The last sentence, she ground out in one breath, voice shaky and she leaned onto her knees and put her head in her hands.

"Did… Did the paramedics say something?" Happy asked her carefully.

"No. They wheeled him Ito the ER, telling me I had to stay outside and the next thing I knew was a doctor in scrubs telling me he is in the OR already. But what's wrong with him, I don't know. They wouldn't tell me." She wasn't looking up at him and just continued staring at the floor.

"Pep, don't worry. He'll be alright." Happy tried comforting her.

"Hap, he was dead for at least 15 minutes. Even if he's not dead… His brain…" Pepper stopped talking and just stared blankly at the floor again, willing herself not to cry. She knew once she started, she'd probably never stop.

"Look at it this way, if it is so bad, the doctor wouldn't have come out to inform you, rather he would have stayed with the patient, don't you think." He tried comforting her, but it really didn't even register with her.

Pepper and Happy continued sitting in silence for some time, waiting for a doctor to come out and give them some news about Tony.  
Suddenly Pepper remembered something. She had no idea why it popped into her head, and she was tempted to let it slide, but it wouldn't feel right and that's not who she was. "Happy, you need to call Emily, Tony's girlfriend. She needs to know. She is… She has a right to know. Maybe she should come over."

"Are you sure about that, Pepper?" Happy asked and looked at her worriedly.

To be honest she wasn't. This girl and Tony barely knew each other. They had spent two weeks together, doing who knows what. This girl had no idea who Tony really was. And yet he had chosen her to live with. He had wanted her to stay in his life, permanently. This girl was his girlfriend now and she had to accept it. "Yes, Happy. Call her. Tell her I send the jet to New York and we'll arrange for everything. Her job… Moving her things to his house and everything will be handled by Stark Industries…"

"Pepper, are you su-" Happy tried interrupting her.

"It's not about what I want, Happy. It's what Tony would have wanted. What Tony wants." She corrected herself, not wanting to think of any other outcome. "Please call her, I'll handle the rest." And Pepper stood and moved to the window, typing away on her phone. Being busy was easier than being still and alone with her thoughts.

* * *

"Miss Potts? Pepper? Pep..." The lights shone right in her eyes and her neck was stiff and hurt. Two people stood in front of her and Happy shook her shoulder gently. The other one was the doctor, still in her scrubs and a hairnet on her head.

"Pepper, I'm sorry to wake you." Happy apologized and stroke her arm gently.

"I fell asleep?" She asked, still a little confused as to where she was and why she was there.

"Yeah, you slept for three hours." Happy said gently.

"Oh." She said and sat up. Then the situation came crashing back down at her. "What happed to Tony? How is he? Is he- " She asked looking at the surgeon, desperately needing answers.

"I'm Dr. Jean Barson, I am Mr. Stark's surgeon. Mr. Stark is fine. For now, and we are confident he will fully recover very soon thanks to your excellent reaction and first aid. He had a pericardial tamponade, that means there had been fluids in his pericardium that hindered his heart and we had to extract that liquid. Unfortunately the device in his chest made the operation very difficult and complicated. That's why it took longer than usual. No one wanted to touch the device and we couldn't use our instruments properly, cause it repelled metal. But in the end we managed to work around it. We also noticed a few metal pieces in his chest, but in his condition we didn't want to risk anything and we left them there for now. If you want to, you can see him now." Dr. Barson concluded and smiled warmly at them.

"Thank you, Dr." Pepper shook his hand and looked over at Happy. It was like the weight of the world had been lifted from her.

"What condition are you talking about? I thought he was going to be fine." Happy asked.

"Well, like I said, we are treating Mr. Stark for pericardial tamponade. We suppose this condition was caused by a very high concentration of palladium, which is toxic and can cause lung conditions, reckless behavior, tiredness, depression and most commonly severe heart failure. He had a heightened concentration of palladium in his blood. We are fairly sure, that he had palladium in his blood for a fairly long time now and that caused his disease. Fortunately it seems to leave his body, but we will wash his blood with a method called MARS to get all the palladium out of his body. The palladium poisoning shouldn't affect him in the future anymore. But do you know how he got the poisoning? Palladium poisoning is a very rare condition, though the symptoms are pretty obvious."

Pepper was unable to speak. _We are fairly sure, that he had palladium in his blood for a fairly long time now and that caused his disease. ...the symptoms are pretty obvious._ He had been poisoned. Palladium. His arc was made of palladium. He had poisoned himself with his reactor. Palladium poisoning causes r_eckless behavior, tiredness, depression_. Monaco, his birthday and Hammer, him giving his company to her, wanting to fly with her to Venice… It all had been symptoms. _I can pick my successor. My successor is you. It's always been you. _He had known he was dying. He had been dying and he had known it. He had been dying. And she hadn't realized it.

Pepper sank back down onto the waiting room chair, not trusting her legs anymore. He had been dying and he had told every day. Not in so many words. But it had been clear as day and she should have noticed, but she had been too preoccupied with herself and being jealous at a super spy.

"But have you found the source of the poisoning?" Happy asked she question she hadn't even known she wanted to ask, yet.

"No, we haven't. For all we know it's receding. The device in his chest also had no signs of poisons or toxins. Maybe he contaminated himself while tinkering. He's an inventor after all." The doctor said. "If you don't need anything else, I have other patients I have to visit. You are free to visit Mr. Stark, but he will probably be sleeping."

"Thank you, Doctor." Pepper said again and stood. At least he was save for now and would fully recover.

Pepper sat in the chair next to him and hold his hand, just looking at him. He looked so peaceful sleeping, yet so vulnerable in his hospital gown, surrounded by tubes and machines. Happy had left an hour ago to pick up Emily from the airport.

"Miss Potts," A nurse came in with a syringe in one hand. "We need to prepare Mr. Strak for his first blood wash."

"Uhm, yes sure." Pepper said and stood, pushing her chair away from his bed. "I'll leave, so you can work…" She was so tired and her mind was fuzzy with what had happened in the last hours.

"You can stay, if you'd like, Miss Potts. Normally we'd only allow the relatives to stay during treatments, but you as his girlfriend -"

"I am his girlfriend." Came a female voice from the door and Pepper's and the nurses head snapped around toward the brown haired, small girl.

"Oh, excuse me. I thought Miss Potts here was his girlfriend…" She trailed off and left the awkwardness hanging in the air.

"No, I'm his business partner and… friend." She hesitated shortly then turned towards Emily, who slowly walked over to Tony. "I'm Pepper Potts. Tony mentioned you're a paramedic." Without waiting for a reply Pepper continued. "He had a pericardial tamponade resulting in heart failure. The doctor said he will fully recover."

"Why do they need to wash his blood?" She asked looking at Pepper with big brown eyes, a little uncertainty and jealousy underlaying her gaze.

"His condition was triggered by poisoning. Presumably he accidentally poisoned himself while tinkering in his workshop." She knew the last part was a lie, but she didn't knew how much Tony had told her about his arc and she would always protect Tony and his secrets.

"Thank you." Emily said and took the hand Pepper had been holding previously. "And thank you for calling me and arranging the flight and everything, Miss Potts."

"You are welcome." Pepper retorted. "I'll leave now… Tony's in good hands." She sighed and went to leave, though her hole being screamed at her to get rid of this girl and stay with Tony.

"How are you holding up?" Emily asked suddenly as Pepper had nearly reached the door, bag in hand.

"Excuse me?" Pepper asked and stopped.

"How are you holding up?" She asked again.

"I am fine, why?" Pepper asked, a little confused why Tony's girlfriend, a woman she didn't know asked her how she was holding up.

"He constantly talks about you and how much you do for him and his company. He loves you. You are his best friend. So I figured you must be close. And you saw him basically die, it must have been a shock." Emily said and smiled at her.

"I'm fine. Good night." Pepper simply stated and left Tony and this girl - no Emily - alone.  
Emily was right, she had seen him die. And the first time she hadn't even noticed and Pepper didn't know if she would be able to ever forgive herself.

* * *

**Prepare for slight Pepperony vibes next week!  
Sneak-Peak: **

He lifted his eyebrows and looked at her disbelievingly. "I think we both know, you'd love to trade your typical, everyday lifestyle for something more… colorful. You're just too scared to actually admit it." Pepper just continued staring at him, but now she actually looked a little offended.

"And honestly? Even if its crazy, try living a little crazy. I mean you can play it save…"

"Or?" She asked, and was disappointed in herself that she couldn't hold back.

"Or you could risk it all and try it."

**Leave a little love :) **


	19. The other side

**This Morning:  
Hey everyone!**

**I know this is not a chapter and thus technically not allowed here. But I let you down and I need to apologize.**

**After reading your comments and your critics I reviewed my story. You are right. I decided to not post new chapters for a while. That doen't mean I'm terminating this Story, though I really thought about it. I'm just as frustrated as you guys are with where I was going...Things got so out of hand here, I don't know if I could still do you all justice and I am sorry I didn't realize it sooner. **

**So I decided to rewrite chapters 17-22. The plot will change, it wont be as slowpaced as before. I don't want to disappoint you guys and I want you to be happy. And you are right, they were very OoC. I'm gonna scratch Tony's relationship with Emily out of the story and it will be more Pepper/Tony centered. Also no more fighting and them growing back together more quickly. You wont have your happy relationship ending right away though, but the progress they'll make to get to gether will be much faster. **

**I'm sorry I let you down. But I heard you and I will try to improve in my new attempt. So please stay with me as I try to make this right for you. I will Update with the new chapter 17 on Monday. I promise. I now just need a little faith and a chance to make it up to you all.**

**Thank you.**

* * *

**_Now:  
_**_**Hello again. I know I'm unnerving you. I unnerve myself, too. **_**_A lot. Anxiety sucks..._**

**_I decided to post 17-22 again, until I decided what to do. Taking them down was an overreaction on my side. And I apologize.  
Though I still don't know/think I'm going to continue this exact plot after Ch. 22. At the moment I feel like I just _****_can't. It's not the reviewers fault!  
_****_My problem is I wrote chapter 23 and 24 already (thats why I have a sneak) and I hated them and rewrote them two times already and still hate them. I feel like I'm stuck, and then people said they got frustrated and discontinue reading and honestly, I realized I am frustrated with the plot too, that's why it didn't work out anymore. I feel like I'm in too deep to get them out again and I hate that. It's like I created the problem, than it got out of hand and now I don't know how to fix it. I'm just... I dunno sad. But not because of your reviews. I know what I want to tell, but I somehow can't. Maybe I'll post the rewrites as sort of a "what/if" spin off. I don't know anymore. For now, you'll get chapter 17-22 back. _**

**_And to make one thing clear, I always have two (unpolished) chapters in my pipeline and every time I update, it's after I wrote a new one. Before I post a new chapter it will get a major walkthrough and sometimes I even rewrite most/big parts. Otherwise the sneaks wouldn't be possible. So yes, I said I wont write until after __Christmas, and that meant: I won't touch 23, 24 until then again, but the main part and plot is already written. _****_Also I didnt want to start on 25 until after Christmas, which has to be written before I put 23 out. _****_But I am unhappy how they turned out, still I included the sneak peak. But like I said, I totally got the reviews and figured out why I hated 23 and 24 so much. It's like a knot I can't untangle... If I have a major breakthrough over Christmas I'll let you know. But the more I think about it, I think I'll rewrite the chapters. Until then I'm giving you the old ones back. But For now I need a little time and space to think..._**

**_But one thing: I wanted to thank you to everyone who believes in me and who reviewed, whether it was criticism or cheering me on. I'm not mad at anyone, I am just... stuck. and unhappy with my writing. and lost. mostly lost, I guess :'D_**

* * *

**Chapter 19: The Other side**

**Hello everyone. **

**First: Thanks for the birthday wishes to my mom! She couldn't fathom, that strangers from the internet actually sent greeting her way and she loved it. I'd say: Faith in humanity restored. Thanks guys!  
**

**Second: Thanks for the reviews everyone! I love that you actually discussed in the reviews and I cannot tell you how grateful and happy I am that you're still with me.**

**Third: Next Chapter! Are you excited? I am... I am really happy about the way it turned out, though it's more background information, than story telling. But The song just screamed Pepper and Tony to me, since the very first time I heard it and I just had to incorporate it. I hope you'll like it as much as I do (:**

**Song: The Other Side by Hugh Jackman and Zac Efron, The greatest Showman**

* * *

**The Other Side**

"Good morning." Pepper turned in her stool, which she had pushed up next to Tony and saw Emily as she entered Tony's room and offered her a coffee to go cup. "I didn't know how you like your coffee, so I just got a black one. I have sugar and cream in my bag, though if you'd prefer that."

Great, this girl was actually nice, now Pepper couldn't hate her as she originally intended.  
"Uhm, thank you. I would take some sugar." She said hesitantly and poured it into her cup after nodding her thanks to Emily again. The both looked at Tony for a second, an awkward silence settled over them. "I just wanted to drop by and see how he is doing, before I get to Stark Industries and tell the board about his condition." She tried explaining, but Emily smiled at her.

"It's fine. I met Happy in the cafeteria and he told me you were heading here, so I figured why not take the opportunity to get to know the woman, who had been running my boyfriend's life for the last decade." Pepper noticed she tried to say it lighthearted, but saw that Emily didn't manage to chase away the stressed and worried look from her face completely. Maybe there was even a bit of jealousy and uncertainty underneath all of it.

Without giving further notice to the getting to know each other part, because honestly, Pepper did not want to spent more time with her than necessary, she turned back to Tony and asked: "How's he been doing?"

"He's good. Tired, though. The operation took a toll on his body and he needs rest. But the doctor said he would get discharged tomorrow, if I'd keep an eye on him and if he'd take it easy at home." Emily sighed and sat on his bed, taking one hand of his in hers.

"Well good luck with making him take it slow." Pepper said under her breath.

"I know. I noticed he's rather restless all the time." Emily wined and bit her lip. Pepper didn't respond, this woman knew him like ten minutes and acted as thought she knew Tony. "Do you have any tips?" She suddenly asked and taking Pepper by surprise.

Pepper blinked a couple of times, before answering the question. "I'd say, keep him away from the shop, and try to occupy his mind otherwise. When he has something to figure out or fiddle with, he can keep still for a few hours. Otherwise you have no chance." Pepper chuckled to herself, and Emily laughed, too.

"I figured as much." She replied. "Can I ask you something?" The brunette asked. "I'm sorry if I come across rude, but is Pepper your real name?"

She didn't know why she did it, maybe it was because Tony was laying in a hospital bed in front of them and had fled the reaper for the third time in two years, maybe it was because she was missing him like crazy and she wanted to talk about him so desperately or maybe it was because she was low-key jealous of this girl and wanted to make clear who she was to him, but Pepper decided to tell the tale.

"No, my name ist Virginia. Pepper is a nickname Tony gave me on the day he tried me."

* * *

_**12 years ago**_

Ginny looked at the clock on her desk and sighed happily. Her shift had officially ended two minutes ago and she was more than happy to head home to her fiancé. Her workday had been long and not exactly exciting. Going through budgeting calculations, filling in forms, transferring data and then starting over on the next file. It payed the bills, but it was boring, repetitive work. If she wouldn't get a promotion soon, she might go insane.

She put all pens back into their cups, cleared her desk and had just shut the lid on her last file when she noticed movement on her left and looked up. Judy, her supervisor had just stepped up to her and held somewhere between six to ten files in hand, looking at her expectantly.

"Virginia, I know you have worked overtime for the last two weeks, but things are so busy right now. And with Belinda on maternity leave and Jessica's promotion as Mr. Stark's PA last week we are even shorter on staff. Do you think there is any possibility, that you could stay for another one or two hours? These files need to be out by tomorrow morning and we need to transfer the budgeting to the military and Mr. Stark's calculations onto the right forms and you need to fill to the cheques for the bank." She asked kindly, but Ginny knew she had no option as to say yes.

Judy was generally a nice supervisor, but this woman was all business and was also known for handing out two weeks notices, like some people handed out candy on halloween, and Ginny needed her job. Desperately. Her fiancé had just moved to LA for her and had yet to find a job, so it was up to her to pay the rent at the moment.  
Internally Ginny sighed, but nodded with a shy smile and took the files from her hand.

"Great. I think you should be good, as Mr. Stark filled them in himself, so you can trust the numbers. When you're done, you can go. I'm out now, myself. Hot date." She winked at Ginny. "Wish me luck. See you tomorrow, Virginia." Judy patted her shoulder and strode off.

Great, with Judy gone Ginny was the last one left in the accounting department. She was alone now, with a shitload of work for the second consecutive week working after hours.  
With another sigh she got ready to work for a few more hours, but not without calling her fiancé first to cancel their own date. He wasn't happy to say the least.

Three hours and five files later, she noticed something was off. The budgeting was way too tight to begin with and that resulted in the calculations for the finished project to be way too low, resulting in the selling price being too low as well.  
If Stark Industries went through with the contract this way they would lose millions of dollars in sells.  
Virginia flipped back to the front-page of the file and saw a note in messy handwriting, saying the contract needed to be our by 11:59 pm tonight. They had a deadline. So she needed to finish it tonight.

Problem was she didn't have the clearance to actively change anything in the calculations or the budgeting, without a supervisor present. Usually when a fault occurred she had to report to the second level and they would fix it or discuss with the engineer who did the calculations.  
But second level was currently on a hot date, so no luck there. And the engineer in charge was Tony Stark himself, her employer and CEO of the company she worked for. And there was that tiny problem with the deadline.  
So there was only one logical option: if she couldn't fix the error herself, and second level wasn't present anymore, Mr. Stark himself needed to fix it. Thank god he was known to be a night owl, if he wasn't drunk at a bar or screwing a girl some where. Figuring she might as well try her luck and save her job, Ginny decided to just walk up to Tony Stark's office and tell him to fix his mistake.

A good 20 minutes later she arrived at his floor. Stark Industries had a big premises and she had never been to the executives building, let alone floor before and she had had trouble finding it. The accounting department was basically placed in a cellar in a very old building on the other side of the premises.  
But the floor was empty and all lights were out. Maybe this was one of those nights he went out partying. Virginia sighed in defeat and turned to hurry back to her desk, feverish thinking about another solution to her problem.

Deciding to take the stairs down, instead of riding the elevator she walked down the 7 floors back to the ground.  
As she passed floor five she noticed it wasn't offices as the other floors. It was actually a development center and workshop. And the lights were on. Maybe she would be able to find someone here with clearance to fix the mistake in the contract budgeting.

Praying that the doors would open, she pulled at the handle and the door really did budge. Entering carefully, she decided it would be best to make herself known, she didn't want to scare anyone working here not reckoning that someone would suddenly enter the work shop.

"Hello?" She called out and heard a noise from the back of the rather large workshop. "Hello? Is anyone here? I really need to talk to an executive. I found a big mistake in the budgeting."  
Deciding to move towards the noise she proceeded forward, but only saw a black leather couch, yet the noise became louder, the closer she came.  
"Hello?" She called out again, before her brain caught up and she realized what exactly the noise was and where it'd been coming from. Her eyes widened in horror as a young man with black hair and a blonde woman suddenly sat up, both sweaty, red-faced and oh - naked. The woman shrieked and scrambled away, clutching a purple blouse to her naked chest.  
Never in her life had Virginia turned around faster than tonight, as she felt embarrassment wash over her like a tidal wave and her face got so hot, she was sure she burned herself from the inside out. She would have left immediately, but the blonde beat her to it and she just saw her naked legs leave through the door.  
Thank god she closed her eyes as soon she saw her naked calves and clutched her hands in front of her face.

"Who the hell are you?" Asked the black haired guy, but he didn't sound upset or mad, more curious. Still she couldn't say anything. It was like she was frozen in place, not able to move. And she didn't wanted to turn or open her eyes either in fear he was still naked. "You can open your eyes again if you want to, you know. I'm decent again." He quipped and she heard he was now in front of her. Carefully she opened her eyes, but shut them again right away.

"You are anything, but decent!" She scolded and didn't know where she suddenly got her courage from to talk to one of the executive engineers like this.

"I am dressed." The guy said matter of factly, with a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Boxer shorts and wearing nothing else is not decent." She snapped and let out an angry huff.

"You could lose some clothes, too. Might get you to losen up a bit. You seem tight. And red. You look almost like a pepper." He said smugly, and she heard him hustling in front of her. When she carefully opened her eyes again, he wore a white shirt and was about to zip his pants.

"Soooo, Pepper, what are you doing here? I doubt you came over to join the little party you just crashed."

She sent him a death glare, but decided to ignore his suggestive comments, fearing it would only be fuel to the fire. "I found a huge mistake in Mr. Stark's calculations and budgeting for a product. And the contract needs to be sent in" she looked at her watch, "two and a half hours to the military, but if they stay that way Stark Industries will lose millions of dollars in this deal." She explained and held the file under his nose.

"You said the calculations came from Mr. Stark directly?" He asked and flipped through the pages.

"Uhm yes." She said, a little surprised she managed to get this stupid flirty engineer into business mode so quick.

"Normally his calculations are right, you know?" He asked, an eyebrow and the left corner of his mouth raised in a smug smirk.

"I know he's the companies CEO and allegedly a genius, but here he really did screw up. I mean, how could you miss such a big calculation error?" She asked, getting a little excited that this guy didn't seem to further object. "I just don't have the clearance level to change the numbers myself." She finished and looked at him hopefully.

"All right then, lets have a look." He gave in and his eyes skimmed the paper.  
She noticed how thick and ruffled his hair was, probably from the hand of the girl he had just been with and the way his brows furrowed as he read through the calculations. His nose was sleek and long and his chocolate brown eyes were big and focused.  
"Hm... It looks like you're right. The calculations are really off, therefore resulting in an budgeting error. Looks like even a genius makes mistakes sometimes. I will change the numbers immediately, so you can finish this up. Good catch, Pepper." He flashed her a smile and handed her the file back.

"Thank you, Sir." She said and turned to leave.

"There's only one thing, Pepper." She turned back to look at him and he was still smiling at her. "Please, don't call me Mr. Stark or Sir. I'm neither, nor. Mr. Stark was my farther. I'm Tony."

For the second time this night her eyes widened in shock, but this time she kept staring at him, mouth agape. "I am so sorry, Mr. Stark. I… I didn't know it was you when I talked about the thing with the genius. I would have never…"

"Hey, calm down. It's alright. I told you you were right. It was my mistake and you caught it. Like I said, good job. Don't worry. Just stop calling me Mr. Stark." The last part he said very sternly, while he was still smiling at her, seizing her up and down.

"It wouldn't be very appropriate to call you by your first name, Mr. Stark." She said softly, but equally stern. "If you'll excuse me now, I really need to go and finish this contract if you want it to be sent before tomorrow." Before she had the chance to brush past him he caught her arm, holding her back.

"You know, it really was a good catch. And I like your personality. You have fire. Do you think you'd like to -" He stated matter of factly.

"I'm not going to sleep with you." It was out of her mouth, before she could stop herself or before she knew she was even saying it.

He chuckled at her, but she gust glared at him, actually feeling a little offended. "What are you laughing about? I'm serious."

"Actually that wasn't what I was suggesting, but if that's what you want…" He started fumbling with his fly. She looked disgusted and tried pushing past him, but he held her back again. "Jeez calm down twisty pants. It was a joke. I actually wanted to offer you a job."

She was taken aback by his offer. "Uhm…" She laughed nervously and blinked a couple of times. "What?"

"Right here, right now I want to offer you a job. I need a new PA." He stated matter of factly.

"But Jessica only started working for you like a week ago." Virginia stated a little confused.

"Yeah. But I fear after what happened here tonight, I might need a new personal assistant. You know, they tend to quit very soon. She was a bit dumb anyways." Mr. Stark shrugged and looked at her, but the redhead continued staring at him wide eyed and confused. "So, what do you say?"

"I already have a job, thank you very much." She said and yanked her arm free from his grip.

"Come on. I don't want to chase you down. We both know your a bit overqualified for your current position." He asked and took a step toward her. "I mean this contract must have passed several hands on its way to you and nobody noticed the error."

She was flattered, she really was, but working for the currently most well known playboy would harm her career more than it would benefit her.

"Thank you, Mr. Stark, but I am happy with my current position. I have to recline your offer." She said and went to leave.

"I know you're bored." He said and it made her stop in her tracks.

"How do you come to think of that?" She challenged?

"You're smart. I can tell, being at the end of the food chain in your department isn't what you want and I bet, no I know you're far more talented than anyone down there. However when you work for me, I can guarantee you it will challenge you every day. But you won't be contained in work routines and boring schemes anymore. When you're already this good when you are a small light in your department, just working according to the stats, think about what you'd be capable of, if you were let lose."

His little speech had left her speechless at first, but know she had found her voice again. "Who says I don't want to stay within my routines and schemes? I don't want anything crazy. I like working according to the protocols."

He lifted his eyebrows and looked at her disbelievingly. "I think we both know, you'd love to trade your typical, everyday lifestyle for something more… colorful. You're just to scared to actually admit it." Ginny just continued staring at him, but now she actually looked a little offended.  
"And honestly? Even if its crazy, try living a little crazy. I mean you can play it save…"

"Or?" She asked, and was disappointed in herself that she couldn't hold back.

"Or you could risk it all and try it."

"And why exactly would I do that?" She asked, determined to throw him off his loop.

"Don't you wanna get away from the same old part you gotta play? Wouldn't you want to face a challenge for once? I bet you have always been the nice, good girl, with the best marks. I bet you never colored outside the lines or actually took a risk. I mean, you can continue to do like you do… Or you can try to do it like me. Stay in the cage, or take the key I'm offering you. It's really up to you. But I can show you another side of life."

"Okay, okay." She managed to get in, before he continued. "I see where you're going at, but now it's my turn to talk. I thank you for your generous offer, but I hate to tell you that I can't take you up on it. So thanks, but no, I'm good as I am, because I actually quite enjoy the life you say I'm trapped in."

"But -" He started, but Ginny cut him off.

"Remember now it was my turn?" She said and raised an eyebrow, making him shut up immediately. "You know, I admire you and how you built the company. With this weapon manufacturing, you're really on to something and the numbers agree with you. But I can't take you're offer. I know you go through PA's like people go through underwear. I mean I just saw it first hand, how you" She coughed uncomfortably and felt herself turn red again. "treat them and what you do with them. I am not that kind of woman. I'm not compatible with that lifestyle. So you can continue to do like you do" She actually used air quotes on that one. "but I'm good to do like me and I ain't in a cage you need to free me from. So I really don't need to see the other side. I'm good on my side. Have nice evening, Mr. Stark. I need to finish the contract." She smiled, shrugged and left.

She actually managed to make it out of the building before he outran her, though she was wearing four inch heels.  
"So is this really how you like to spent the rest of your career?" He asked and jogged up to her, walking next to her. "Filing reports, filling out forms and sending out contracts other people wrote? Working for a supervisor, who doesn't even take you seriously? Wouldn't you rather be in charge of the contracts and advise me in budgeting and stuff? Your career could really benefit from working closely with me." He suggested.

At that she stopped and laughed sarcastically. "If I were mixed up with you I'd be the talk of the company. The town actually. Tony Starks's next PA, how long will she last. I can see it already in the tabloids. No-one will ever take me seriously, if I become your PA. Everyone will just assume I slept my way up to work for you. I refuse to be one of those women who sleeps with or uses men to gain benefits for themself. And I refused to be seen as one, as well." She nodded an him proceeded stalking away again, thinking she might have finally gotten rid of him.

But she had not such luck. "And if I swear to you to never, ever hit on you or make any advances?" He asked.

"You couldn't keep that oath." She said, an eyebrow raised again.

"Yeah, you're probably right. But just think about it for a second. I admit working for me would be a challenge, and maybe even more stressful than your currently job, but one year." He said, sticking his forefinger out, holding it up, suddenly having an idea.

"One year?" She asked now really confused, wondering how the mind of a genius, playboy worked.

"If you manage to work one year for me, successfully, you can get any job in any company you want. No, don't say anything right now. Just think about it for anther second. One year to built a reputation for yourself. I'm not saying it won't be hard or there won't be any talk about you sleeping your way to this position, but if you manage to stick with me for one year, all doors are open for you. But I'll leave it up to you." He said and stopped walking, letting her continue on a few steps further. When she actually stopped, as well he knew he had her.

The gears in her head started turning involuntarily. She carefully weight the added strain it would put on her relationship, it surely would be more time consuming than her current job was. But he was right. No PA he ever had, had stuck around for more than a week, two tops. If she managed to make it for one year, and maybe get him to be a bit more responsible for his company she would be able to get any job she wanted to.

"Added bonus, you won't be bored anymore. So…" He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "Balls in your court now, Pepper."

"Well it's intriguing, but to do this job would require a few more commitments from your side." She said and noticed how his eyes lit up.

"Fair enough, let me hear them." He offered and rubbed his hands together.

"First of, I need a salary bump." She said.

"Done, I double your salary. What else?" Her eyes went wide. She knew he paid his PA's well, but they had only ever lasted a week and she hadn't expected him to agree immediately, let alone double her salary.

"Uhm, I won't be one of your conquest. So don't bother making any advances. If you harass me, I'm done. You understand?" She said and made sure, to make him see she would stood her ground on this one.

"I can't promise for my drunken self, but I'll try." He said.

"That's good enough for now." Ginny conceded. "I need the weekends off. And to leave early on Fridays. Also the latest I can stay is 6 pm, when no special events occur." She continued.

"Allright, you'll need some sleep. I can offer Sunday evenings off and latest work time 10 pm. It's a good deal, shake and we make it happen." He offered and outstretched his hand.

Ginny, in return laughed. "Mr. Strak, I'm engaged to be married. I need the weekends off and I want to see my fiancé at least once a day."

He huffed and furrowed his brows. "Fine. Sunday's off, Saturday's work, if it's required and you stay until 8 pm."

"Make it 7 and I'm in." She offered and took his still outstretched hand.

Tony Stark took her rather petite one in his big and calloused hand and shook it. "Deal. Anything else?"

"Yeah, since I already know who you are, I'd like to return the favor. I'm Virginia Potts." She said and smiled at him.

"Yeah, Pepper suits you way better, than Virginia." He said and let go of her hand, taking a peek at his watch. "I think you should go, if you want to finish the contract and get it out in time. I'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning. I'll have JARVIS send you all the information."

Ginny assumed Jarvis was one of his secretaries and didn't press the matter any further. Also he was right about the contract. She didn't want to start her new position with a disaster.

"Will that be all, Mr. Stark?" She asked, not knowing this sentence would hold so much meaning to her in twelve years from now.

He smiled at her, but this smile was different than the once he had given her before. It was a real smile, not the famous Tony Stark smile.  
"That will be all, Miss Pepper Potts."

* * *

**Sooo... I am actually really proud about how it turned out. I know it didn't contribute much to the actual story line, but I wanted to incorporate it anyways, because for me it's always important where a character is coming from. Hopefully you guys liked it, too.**

**Next week we get a reunion. Sneak Peak: **

"Don't get me wrong, they do. But you know, you don't need to impress me anymore. I am already impressed." Alex reached across the table to take her hand.

The redhead furrowed her brows at him, but before she could say anything Tony's voice interjected from behind her.  
"You know, you really shouldn't give women styling advices, man. I'm sure she has more taste than a normal military man."

**Leave a little Love (:**


	20. Love of my Life

**This Morning:  
Hey everyone!**

**I know this is not a chapter and thus technically not allowed here. But I let you down and I need to apologize.**

**After reading your comments and your critics I reviewed my story. You are right. I decided to not post new chapters for a while. That doen't mean I'm terminating this Story, though I really thought about it. I'm just as frustrated as you guys are with where I was going...Things got so out of hand here, I don't know if I could still do you all justice and I am sorry I didn't realize it sooner. **

**So I decided to rewrite chapters 17-22. The plot will change, it wont be as slowpaced as before. I don't want to disappoint you guys and I want you to be happy. And you are right, they were very OoC. I'm gonna scratch Tony's relationship with Emily out of the story and it will be more Pepper/Tony centered. Also no more fighting and them growing back together more quickly. You wont have your happy relationship ending right away though, but the progress they'll make to get to gether will be much faster. **

**I'm sorry I let you down. But I heard you and I will try to improve in my new attempt. So please stay with me as I try to make this right for you. I will Update with the new chapter 17 on Monday. I promise. I now just need a little faith and a chance to make it up to you all.**

**Thank you.**

* * *

**_Now:  
_**_**Hello again. I know I'm unnerving you. I unnerve myself, too. **_**_A lot. Anxiety sucks..._**

**_I decided to post 17-22 again, until I decided what to do. Taking them down was an overreaction on my side. And I apologize.  
Though I still don't know/think I'm going to continue this exact plot after Ch. 22. At the moment I feel like I just _****_can't. It's not the reviewers fault!  
_****_My problem is I wrote chapter 23 and 24 already (thats why I have a sneak) and I hated them and rewrote them two times already and still hate them. I feel like I'm stuck, and then people said they got frustrated and discontinue reading and honestly, I realized I am frustrated with the plot too, that's why it didn't work out anymore. I feel like I'm in too deep to get them out again and I hate that. It's like I created the problem, than it got out of hand and now I don't know how to fix it. I'm just... I dunno sad. But not because of your reviews. I know what I want to tell, but I somehow can't. Maybe I'll post the rewrites as sort of a "what/if" spin off. I don't know anymore. For now, you'll get chapter 17-22 back. _**

**_And to make one thing clear, I always have two (unpolished) chapters in my pipeline and every time I update, it's after I wrote a new one. Before I post a new chapter it will get a major walkthrough and sometimes I even rewrite most/big parts. Otherwise the sneaks wouldn't be possible. So yes, I said I wont write until after __Christmas, and that meant: I won't touch 23, 24 until then again, but the main part and plot is already written. _****_Also I didnt want to start on 25 until after Christmas, which has to be written before I put 23 out. _****_But I am unhappy how they turned out, still I included the sneak peak. But like I said, I totally got the reviews and figured out why I hated 23 and 24 so much. It's like a knot I can't untangle... If I have a major breakthrough over Christmas I'll let you know. But the more I think about it, I think I'll rewrite the chapters. Until then I'm giving you the old ones back. But For now I need a little time and space to think..._**

**_But one thing: I wanted to thank you to everyone who believes in me and who reviewed, whether it was criticism or cheering me on. I'm not mad at anyone, I am just... stuck. and unhappy with my writing. and lost. mostly lost, I guess :'D_**

* * *

**Chapter 20: Love of my Life**

**Hello, there. It's nearly 11:30 pm and I have to work tomorrow, but I didn't want to leave you guys hanging... So any mistakes I blame on my very sleep deprived brain and my body slowly shutting down... :D **

**Thanks for the kind reviews. Although some of you didn't like the the last chapter, it was my fav one so far, so I appreciate the nice reviews even more. Also big thanks to ****mrsstark83** **(I recommend you reading her FFs!) for being very nice and listening to my ugly crying via PM :) **

**The story continues, guys. :) I'm looking forward to read your thoughts. You'll find the sneak peak at the bottom. Btw: How do you guys like the sneak peaks? Should I keep them or should I quit them?**

**Song: Love of my Life by Queen**

* * *

**Love of my Life**

When Tony opened his eyes again Emily was still sitting by his side, scrolling through her phone. Otherwise the room was empty.

"Hey." He rasped out to get her attention.

He head snapped up and she locked her phone, putting it away. "Good afternoon, sleepy head." She smiled at him and moved forward, closer to him. "Can I get you some water? Food maybe? Anything?" She asked and stroked his hair back.

"Water." He demanded and rubbed his eyes, the IV tubes hitting his body slightly. He hated hospitals. "When can I go home?"

Emily filled a styrofoam cup with ice water and handed it to him, after she helped him sit up. "I'll go and get Dr. Barson. She wanted to see you once you woke."

Tony watched her leave his room and lay his head back. He had known the palladium levels in his blood wouldn't sink over night, but he had figured with his new reactor he would be on the save side at least. Turns out palladium was much harder to get rid of, than just extracting the cause of the poisoning. He had had his first blood wash this morning. It hadn't been as bad as it had sounded at first. Actually it had felt like giving blood plasma. Out of one tube and back in through another.

Thank god Emily had a medical background and was able to explain everything in detail to him. He hated doctors and he hated hospitals, but what he hated even more were treatments that included punching holes into him. But with his girlfriend and her professional manner present it hadn't been that bad.

Even Pepper had stepped by for a few minutes in between two meetings and had come to check on him.

The atmosphere between the two of them had been markedly polite at first, yet you could have been able to cut the tension with a butter knife. It had lightened the mood when Emily had informed Tony, Pepper had been the one who was responsible for the bruises and throbbing pain in his ribs.

"Thank you, Miss Potts. You saved my miserable ass once again." He had said when she had announced she had to leave. In return she had smiled at him and said "Rest up, Mr. Stark. I expect you to join the next Stark Tower meeting in a month." At least they weren't yelling at each other anymore. Maybe they would be able to work together again in the future. Maybe they would even be able become friends again. Somehow dying put everything back into perspective for him.

However what struck him as odd, was that Pepper hadn't said a word to him about his poisoning. Emily had told him about the incident with herself, Pepper and the doctor and the misconception, that Pepper was his girlfriend, giggling at the thought, since they were such good friends and that Tony had told her Pepper was the last girl he'd ever get together with. Tony had cringed a little, painfully aware about how true his words had been and for a second he had wished it hadn't been a misconception, but he had pushed this thought aside as Emily turned and kissed his forehead lovingly, telling him what her plans were for him once he was home and rested. It involved a nurse costume and… well you get the picture, and he hadn't wanted to ponder about the one who got away, when is smoking hot girlfriend talked dirty to him.

But when he was alone with his thoughts again, Pepper crept back into his mind. He knew the doctor had told her about the poisoning, and they couldn't find the source. And Pepper knew his old RT had had a palladium core. She wasn't stupid, she must have done the math and figured out his old reactor had been killing him. She had learned about the symptoms palladium poisoning caused and she would know by now he had been dying this whole time. Yet she hadn't said a word to him about it. And he couldn't figure out why.

Maybe she was disappointed he hadn't told her, angry even. Maybe she didn't care, since they weren't even friends any more. Maybe he would never figure out the mystery Pepper Potts was to him.

The door opened again and Emily returned with his doctor, pulling him from his thoughts about his CEO.  
"Tony, Dr. Barson says, you can go home tomorrow, after your last blood wash." Emily said and sat down next to him on his bed.

"Yes, Mr. Stark you can go home tomorrow." The middle aged woman confirmed. "But only because your girlfriend is medically trained and your home is equipped with an excellent vital monitoring system." At least JARVIS had him covered. "But I must insist you stay on bedrest for at least one more week and take it slow afterwards. That means no alcohol or drugs, only medically prescribed exercises for at least two weeks. You heard me?"

"Yes Ma'am." Tony said and nodded, just happy to get out of the hospital.

"You were lucky, Mr. Stark. Your CEO is very good at CPR. If it wasn't for her, you might have ended up dead. You should be grateful." Dr. Barson moved to explain to Emily what medication he needed to take and what she needed to be aware of, but Tony zoned out. Pepper had saved his ass for hundredth time. But the atmosphere between them was still so tense. They had hurt each other so deeply. He really didn't know if they could ever overcome it.  
And then he caught Emily's eye and she smiled at him. She was so beautiful and always cheerful, even when he was laying in a paper gown in a hospital bed. Her sparkling hazel eyes send a warmth running through his body and he returned the smile, happy to at least not be alone in this cold, white hospital room. He wasn't sure when it had happened, but Emily seemed to become a light house in the dark for him. She wasn't a mere distraction any more, she really started to grow on him.

"Well, looks like we'll get you home tomorrow, Stark." She took his hand an squeezed it. "Sad, I'll miss stealing the jello from your tray when you're snoozing." She winked at him and he laughed his first genuine laugh in a while.

* * *

When Tony walked into his home the next day there were moving boxes all over the entrance hall.  
"Uhm, I meant to have everything unpacked before you got discharged, but then I spent so much time with you in the hospital…" Emily started rambling, but Tony chuckled and cut her off with a swift kiss. She was such a sweet girl.

"It's alright. I don't mind, Emily. I asked you to move in with me. Besides I don't think this will be the only chaos we'll endure in this household." He pressed a quick kiss into her hair and walked into the house.

"Daddy's home!" He said loudly and outstretched his arms.

"Good afternoon, Sir." JARVIS voice greeted him. "It's good to see your back. Your vitals look promising."

"Thanks, traitor. You could have warned me beforehand, that I might die from the lasting toxicity in my blood." Tony scolded the AI.

"Unfortunately, Sir you stopped giving me blood work after you swapped to the new reactor, so there wasn't any way for me to predict the dangers." The AI said in almost a scolding and defending tone. "And as I tried to warn you about pending risks, you mut-"

"Mute." Tony said and turned to Emily. "Let's get you settled in, shall we?" He asked and a glint in his eye appeared.

"No, you, Mr. are supposed to be in bed right now." She said and pushed him towards the stairs.

"Not even two minutes at home and already trying to get me into bed. I like that. It's kinky." He said and spun her around, so she was in front of him, kissing her.

"Tony," Emily protested, but he ignored her. "You're not supposed to strain yourself." She tried again, but they were already half way to the stairs and the way he was kissing and touching her was slowly undoing her.

"I don't see the problem. I'm off to bed after all. And I promise, I'll tell you, if I'm not feeling well." He reassured and leaned in to kiss her, now it was his turn pushing her to the stair and she happily obliged.

As they passed the guest room, Tony had always referred to as Pepper's room, he caught a glimpse of it through the half opened door. He saw the nightstand on the other side of the room was empty and it made him stop dead in his tracks, breaking the kiss.

"What? What is it?" Emily panted in front of him. "Are you ok, Tony?" She asked, suddenly worried.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm good." He said and kissed her on the lips chastely to reassure her, but it was only halfheartedly. "Did, uhm, did Pepper come over while I was gone." He asked, still looking in the direction of his girlfriend, but really looking through the crack between the door and the frame into the now empty room.

"Yes she came by yesterday, after we got my things from the airport and said she needed to collect few of her things. I was already back on my way to you when she left." Emily said nonchalantly trying to kiss him again.  
But Tony couldn't. The knowledge that Pepper had really packed her stuff left him, oddly enough, empty. Empty like her room was now. Like she was gone for good. He needed to get into the room and see it for himself, that it was empty. But it would be odd to go into the room and start sulking with his girlfriend present.  
It was then that her realized, Emily was back to kissing his neck and slowly buttoning up his shirt. It probably was a first in his life, but he couldn't sleep with her now. He didn't want to.

"Ems…" No reaction from her. "Ems. Emily. Emily!" He tried, getting louder every time. Finally she stopped. "I think you have been right. I'm tired. More than I'd liked to admit. Can… um can we postpone this?" He asked and threw in a yawn to get his point across. "I'm really sorry, but I think I should really take it slow."

Emily looked at him a little irritated, but smiled and let go of him. "Sure, Hon. Let's get you to bed." She said and took his hand, pulling him in the direction of his bedroom, gently.

"Actually," Tony started, needing to get rid of her for the moment. "do you think you could make me a…" _Quick you need something that takes a while to make, Tony. _"tea?" He hated tea, but if that would buy him some time he would go through with it. "And maybe a sandwich?" He added to sound less suspicious.

"Sure." She smiled again, and pressed a kiss to his cheek, turning around to head back downstairs.

Tony waited till he heard her reach the bottom of the stairs and opened the door to Pepper's room.  
It was clean and impeccable. And empty. There were no personal belongings left, nothing that indicated that Pepper had ever spend time in there. It was like their friendship had never existed. Tony sighed and sat down on the end of the bed, putting his head in his hands. On his second sigh he noticed he could still smell a trace of her perfume hanging in the air. As he inhaled deeply again, to get every last trace of it. It was so stupid. He had never been sentimental or nostalgic, but he couldn't help himself. He was out of the room in seconds, not able to endure the fact that Pepper was gone anymore.

* * *

Over the course of the next two weeks Tony had been bored out of his mind. Emily, JARVIS and somehow even Pepper had bundled up and shut him out of his workshop and his online database, so he couldn't get any work on his suit or one of his other projects done. The only thing he had been allowed to work on had been the green energy project aka Stark Tower. Pepper wanted him to prepare for the meeting after all.

In the end he had been so frustrated and tech deprived he had started taking apart the kitchen and living room tech one after another to improve things that really didn't needed improving, when Emily had gone out or wasn't looking and JARVIS had been busy with updating or he simply had overridden his protocols. But one morning the toaster had nearly set the kitchen on fire and he had to come clean that he had been secretly tinkering. Emily had been near a complete meltdown, not knowing how to get the billionaire to stay down and had shut herself in a bathroom, crying and in the end had called his former PA, asking - no begging for help.

Pepper, more than unnerved, had appeared and handled the situation like the pro she was. Telling him to get his shit together and show a little respect for his hard trying girlfriend. To say he had been sulking, that his girlfriend had called Pepper of all people for help and that the redhead had actually shown up was an understatement. He had been furious. He maybe could understand Emily asking for help, granted he had been a pain in the ass for her the last two weeks, but that Pepper had really showed up to scold him was a big No-No to him. They hadn't talked in forever about anything other than business matters and suddenly she was back to running his life? But he was tired of fighting her, so he listened to what she had to say and after he saw Emily's relieved face he knew Pepper had been right. Emily was trying really hard and she deserved better from him.

"Tell you what, once I'm back on track, we'll go out on a date. You decide the place and what we do." He had told Emily and she had smiled a still tearful smile but had nodded in agreement. When he had looked up to see if Pepper approved, he noticed she had already vanished from his property.

Now, two and a half weeks after he got discharged, he found himself in one of LA's fanciest restaurants, The C5 with his girlfriend on his arm. He wore one of his signature Hugo Boss suits, along with sneakers and figured he cleaned up nicely. Emily had gone for a black cocktail dress with black flats and pinned her long hair back from her face. She looked stunning to say the least, but very nervous and excited at the same time. Her whole life she had been working as a nurse or a paramedic and had never had the chance to go such a fancy place like this.  
Tony had even taken her shopping beforehand to buy her the dress. She had simply never needed a dress for such occasions and locations. It was adorable how she got excited with the most common things for Tony. Like getting a dress fitted just for her, dining out in a fancy restaurant or having someone drive you around. It really made him appreciate how blessed he truly was. It was nice change to feel humbled and to give something back at the same time.

Her eyes had nearly glazed over when they had first entered The C5. The place was buzzing and packed, but the good thing when you're dating Tony Stark was that you always get a table. Even without a reservation.  
As they made their way over to one of the free tables, following the hostess Tony noticed a couple a few tables to the left. He was an average looking guy with dark blond hair, dressed in black pants, a blue button down and a black jacket. Across from him sat a redhead. The emerald green cocktail dress made her loose red curls even more vibrant and her long legs ended in 4 inch, back killer heels. The couple seemed to be in a deep conversation, not noticing anyone around them.

"Could you give us second?" Tony asked the hostess and gave Emily a wicked smile as he pulled her along by her hand. He then made is way over to the couple's table.

As he neared them he heard pieces of their conversation.  
"All I'm saying, B is, you could try and wear flats for once. I mean you can wear what ever you want, but I, personally like flats better. They are more comfortable and I want you to be comfortable." He said, but his tone was light, not scolding in any way.

"But I find my heels very comfortable, Alex." Pepper answered bemused. "And I like the way they accentuate my legs." She winked at him and reached for her glass.

"Don't get me wrong, they do. But you know you don't need to impress me anymore. I am already impressed." Alex reached across the table to take her hand.

The redhead furrowed her brows at him, but before she could say anything, Tony's voice interjected from behind her.  
"You know, you really shouldn't give women styling advices, man. I'm sure she has more taste than a normal military man has."

Both heads snapped up to Tony and Emily who stood behind them.  
"Tony? What are you doing here?" Pepper asked surprised, but Alex had risen from his chair, his fists curled into tight balls.

"Stark" He growled out.

"I'm officially free to go out again. Emily discharged me from the prison you call my home, this afternoon." He answered Pepper's question with a proud smile and turned to Alex. "You might want to unclench those fists, you'll end up breaking your knuckles." Tony said in his average arrogant slur.

"You broke my nose." Alex said through clenched teeth, his fists still tightly curled.

"Relax, buddy. I apologize. I was out of line and drunk. And to be fair, I didn't know Pepper had a boyfriend at that time, so I thought you were some weirdo who snuck up on her." Tony held up his hands in surrender, and Pepper blinked at him. Tony had never apologized to anyone in his life. And yet, he just did. And he did it to her boyfriend. "Pepper, you might want to close your mouth. Not pretty." The last part Tony said in a loud whisper. And Pepper did, but was still speechless.

"Uhm, ok?" Alex asked, unsure of what to make of his apology.

"Tony, can I talk to you for a second?" Pepper asked so sweetly, everyone knew it was fake.

"Sure." Tony agreed, but put his hand on Emilys back, gently pushing her forward, effectively switching places. "Alex, this is Emily, my girlfriend. Emily, this is Alex, Pepper's better half." Pepper knew his nice tone about Alex was actually sarcasm, and rolled her eyes. "Honey, I'll leave you with him for a second, you ok with that?"

"Yeah ok." Emily shrugged nonchalantly and moved to take Pepper's place.

Pepper stood to make way for Emily. "Hi Emily, by the way." Pepper said and tried looking apologetic over at her as they switched places.

"Hey Pepper, sorry for the hazard. I didn't knew you were here. And I didn't knew he would disturb you." She looked over at her boyfriend and glared at Tony, who was already a few steps away.

"No! No, don't be sorry. I am kidnapping him right now. I am sorry." Pepper said and squeezed the other woman's shoulder.

"Are you coming or what?" Tony called over before Emily could say another word.

"You good?" Pepper asked Alex and bit her lip in guilt.

"Go, B. We're good." He said and waved at the waiter to get Emily another glass of wine.

As Pepper reached Tony she overheard him talking to the hostess to set up his table next to Pepper's and Alex's.

"Can you tell me, what you're doing?" She demanded a little unnerved.

"I just wanted to have a nice evening out with my girlfriend in one of the fanciest restaurants in place. I didn't know you and GIJoe over there would be here as well." He looked over her shoulder towards their respective partners.  
"And now that we met, I figured we all should get know each other better."

"You… you mean a double date?" Tony just shrugged and grinned. "You don't do double dates, Tony. You don't do dates." She furrowed her brows. "What are you up to?" Pepper asked, squinting her eyes at him.

Tony breathed in deeply and smoothed his hands over her shoulders. Pepper tried to ignore the army of butterflies that involuntarily started in her stomach and willed herself to not turn red at the thought of his hands on her.  
"You know, nearly dying changes your perspective on things. I think we need to stop being at each others throats all the time. I know you are happy with Alex. And I am happy with Emily as well. So there is really no need to be constantly fighting over this." He shrugged at her and put his hands in his pockets, swaying back and forth in his feet.

"Aha." She said warily. "So you are saying you want to declare armistice." She concluded.

"If you want to call it that way, sure. I just want to be able to talk to you about work stuff and not fight the rest of the time. I'm done fighting with you over Alex or Emily for the matter. You are happy, I am happy, lets leave it that way." Tony said and looked to the side. He wasn't sure wether he was trying to convince her or himself.

"And you think we can do that?" Pepper asked and there was hope wavering in her voice.

"I think we can do everything, Miss Potts." His lip twitched in a small smile. "So, do we have an armistice?"

"Ok." Pepper answered and didn't want to dwell on this topic any more.

"How are you doing? What did the doctors say?" She asked to change the topic, concern now lingering in her voice.

"I'm as good as new. The MARS method worked." Tony simply stated, avoiding the elephant in the room.

"Good. That's good news." She nodded and an awkward silence settled over them. After a while Pepper couldn't handle it anymore. "I have to ask, why didn't you tell me…" Pepper trailed off, leaving the question heavily hanging in the air. She didn't wanted to ruin the evening or their fresh reconnection, but she was constantly thinking about how she could have missed him slowly dying right in front of her and why he hadn't told her in the first place. Maybe everything would have gone differently between them.

Tony looked at her and he saw hurt, sadness, doubt and a million questions hidden behind her big blue eyes and he wanted nothing more, than to take all those away from her. But this was neither the place nor the time, nor the situation to tell her everything so he settled for the easiest answer. "I just… didn't."  
Her eyes turned darker with his answer and hurt, but mostly self-doubt became prominent and he hated himself for making her feel this way.  
"Look Pep, I think this is neither the time, nor the place to talk about that. I think we should return to our dates now." He said and looked behind her, Emily and Alex appeared to be in deep conversation, but the moment hung above them like a black curtain.

When they returned to their tables, a second table had been moved to stand directly next to Pepper's and Alex's table. Pepper took place next to Alex now, and Tony next to his girlfriend. They ordered food and more wine, but Alex and Emily did most of the talking.

Pepper was still in her head, thinking about him not really telling her he had been dying. Also she was still thinking about his words. _I just didn't._ She knew he hadn't meant it hurtful or hateful. But there was more to it then he let on. Was he deflecting? Had he really not wanted to to tell her? Had he ran so fast out of time he hadn't had time to tell her? Why hadn't she noticed his symptoms? She had known him so well.

Tony on the other hand was thinking across from her, himself. She had looked so sad when she had asked him why he hadn't told her. But he couldn't tell her, just like he couldn't tell her almost a year ago. Though this time it wasn't because he was in love with her and didn't know _how_ to tell her, this time he couldn't talk to her about it, because he had lost her already.

"… and then I told Rhodey, if he wanted high heels to go with the blouse I could get him some." Alex and Emily laughed loudly at his joke and Tony chuckled absentmindedly along, as Pepper only smiled, not getting the joke, because she hadn't listened.

"Oh I love Rhodey, he's so funny!" Emily cooed and gripped Tony's hand over the table.

"We all should go and grab lunch some times." Alex suggested. "I mean he's friends with all of us. What do you guys think?" He looked at Pepper and Tony expectingly.

"Yeah, sure. It could be fun." Pepper said and looked over at Alex, smiling. He in turn put his arm around her, after stroking her cheek. She placed a kiss in his palm and turned to look over at the other couple. Tony was rubbing circles on Emily's knuckles while Alex rambled on about Rhodey and their time at the military. As Tony's eyes crossed Pepper's she quickly turned her head away, pretending to listen to her boyfriend, but she could feel his gaze on her.

After dinner Tony and Emily shared a chocolate soufflé, literally feeding each other. Pepper wanted to puke. She hated love sick behavior in public and elaborated public display of affection in general. After they asked for the bill, Pepper excused herself to go freshen up.

As she returned she met Tony in front of the restrooms.  
"Why do you keep looking at me?" He confronted her.

"Tony let it slide. They're waiting for us." Pepper asked and went to go back.

"Pepper, are you happy?" He asked her openly.

"Me? Yes. Why wouldn't I be?" She asked, though it was rhetorically. But Tony continued looking at her, apparently not convinced. "Fine." She sigh. "I was wondering wether you are happy." She admitted. "You two know each other very shortly and you never had a serious relationship before, and Emily is a sweet girl. I just wondered if… if…"

"If it's real?" He finished for her. "Yes, it is. We are happy and I adore her." He told her, maybe a little too quickly.

"Then all is good, isn't it?" Pepper said, and waited for a response, because she noticed his hastiness. When no response came she left for their table.

When she returned with Tony close behind her, Emily and Alex where smiling at them. "We settled a date for lunch." Alex said as he helped Pepper into her coat.

"Date?" Pepper asked him surprised, but smiled, not wanting to feed Tony's suspicions further.

"Yeah, for lunch with Rhodes." Emily finished. "You and Tony both have appointments tomorrow at Stark Industries, and Rhodey and Alex have meetings in town. So it'll be the perfect opportunity to meet up!" She said excitedly.

"Looks like we're having a lunch date." Tony concluded and helped Emily into her coat.

* * *

**Yeah, they are on speaking terms again! I hope you liked it.**

**Sneak peak:**

When they spoke next, they did it simultaneously.  
"Do you though?" Pepper asked and turned a little pink.  
"About Stark Tower…" Tony started and they both stopped, looked at each other and chuckled.

"You go first." Pepper said, happy to get an escape from the question, that had nearly burned her tongue.

**Leave a little love :)**


	21. Begin again

**This Morning:  
Hey everyone!**

**I know this is not a chapter and thus technically not allowed here. But I let you down and I need to apologize.**

**After reading your comments and your critics I reviewed my story. You are right. I decided to not post new chapters for a while. That doen't mean I'm terminating this Story, though I really thought about it. I'm just as frustrated as you guys are with where I was going...Things got so out of hand here, I don't know if I could still do you all justice and I am sorry I didn't realize it sooner. **

**So I decided to rewrite chapters 17-22. The plot will change, it wont be as slowpaced as before. I don't want to disappoint you guys and I want you to be happy. And you are right, they were very OoC. I'm gonna scratch Tony's relationship with Emily out of the story and it will be more Pepper/Tony centered. Also no more fighting and them growing back together more quickly. You wont have your happy relationship ending right away though, but the progress they'll make to get to gether will be much faster. **

**I'm sorry I let you down. But I heard you and I will try to improve in my new attempt. So please stay with me as I try to make this right for you. I will Update with the new chapter 17 on Monday. I promise. I now just need a little faith and a chance to make it up to you all.**

**Thank you.**

* * *

**_Now:  
_**_**Hello again. I know I'm unnerving you. I unnerve myself, too. **_**_A lot. Anxiety sucks..._**

**_I decided to post 17-22 again, until I decided what to do. Taking them down was an overreaction on my side. And I apologize.  
Though I still don't know/think I'm going to continue this exact plot after Ch. 22. At the moment I feel like I just _****_can't. It's not the reviewers fault!  
_****_My problem is I wrote chapter 23 and 24 already (thats why I have a sneak) and I hated them and rewrote them two times already and still hate them. I feel like I'm stuck, and then people said they got frustrated and discontinue reading and honestly, I realized I am frustrated with the plot too, that's why it didn't work out anymore. I feel like I'm in too deep to get them out again and I hate that. It's like I created the problem, than it got out of hand and now I don't know how to fix it. I'm just... I dunno sad. But not because of your reviews. I know what I want to tell, but I somehow can't. Maybe I'll post the rewrites as sort of a "what/if" spin off. I don't know anymore. For now, you'll get chapter 17-22 back. _**

**_And to make one thing clear, I always have two (unpolished) chapters in my pipeline and every time I update, it's after I wrote a new one. Before I post a new chapter it will get a major walkthrough and sometimes I even rewrite most/big parts. Otherwise the sneaks wouldn't be possible. So yes, I said I wont write until after __Christmas, and that meant: I won't touch 23, 24 until then again, but the main part and plot is already written. _****_Also I didnt want to start on 25 until after Christmas, which has to be written before I put 23 out. _****_But I am unhappy how they turned out, still I included the sneak peak. But like I said, I totally got the reviews and figured out why I hated 23 and 24 so much. It's like a knot I can't untangle... If I have a major breakthrough over Christmas I'll let you know. But the more I think about it, I think I'll rewrite the chapters. Until then I'm giving you the old ones back. But For now I need a little time and space to think..._**

**_But one thing: I wanted to thank you to everyone who believes in me and who reviewed, whether it was criticism or cheering me on. I'm not mad at anyone, I am just... stuck. and unhappy with my writing. and lost. mostly lost, I guess :'D_**

* * *

**Chapter 21: Begin again**

**I don't really want to say much. Just thanks for your reviews! Just so you don't get me wrong: I like each and every review, even if you don't like the chapter I wrote. I'm trying to improve (:**

**Next week I will update on Tuesday, not Monday. I'm sorry, but I'm invited to a Christmas party on Monday night. :D  
Also I probably won't have time to write over Christmas, cause my family is huge. S****o next week might be the last update for 2019. But I'll let you know next week. Maybe I manage to put something small together and manage write a chapter, if I find the motivation.**

**Great, now I have said more than I wanted... :D Happy reading, y'all.**

**Song: Begin again by Taylor Swift, but my inspiration came from the cover by the Piano guys ft. Megan Nicole and Alex Groot. You should chck it out some time:)**

* * *

**Begin again**

Her Wednesday had been pretty good so far. The meetings with R'n'D that morning had gone smooth, now that Tony was back on track and ready to finish the previously started walkthrough.

The board had also approved of the new outline for Stark Tower in New York and they had been actually pretty pleased with her work and how she had managed to get Tony fully on board. It had also been the first meeting for Pepper, where most of the board members had talked to her directly instead of Tony, because before they had forgot she was CEO now or because they still questioned her reputation. It looked like the constant reminders, by either her or Tony were over and she had finally made herself a name and was being taken seriously as the CEO.

After the board meeting Tony had gone to the facility to see how the new element functioned with a bigger version of the arc reactor, instead of his small one, as Pepper had attended another meeting regarding one of their legal cases.

Unfortunately said meeting with legal had gone way longer than she had expected and she had texted Tony he should go ahead without her and go to their lunch location "Coffeeni" to meet the rest, she would be joining them shortly after.  
When Pepper finally got to the small cafe twenty minutes late, it had started raining and she was grateful Happy had a spare umbrella in his vehicle. As she stepped into the small cafe she closed her umbrella and looked around to see if she'd spot their group.

The cafe had dark wood along the walls, with various small nooks to sit in, topped of with very comfy looking armchairs. All around they'd put different styles of tables and stools, yet it seemed to belong together in an oddly satisfying way and there was music playing in the background. The air smelled like coffee and panini bread and the place was full with people.  
Rhodey and Tony were sitting in a small nook in the back of the cafe, but from where Pepper stood she couldn't see them, there were too many people in between, blocking her view. Tony, however, had seen her the minute she had set foot into the location. She was standing in the entrance, dressed in a beige trench coat, black pencil-skirt, purple blouse and her signature black heels, a silver Stark Industries umbrella in hand. He stood and waved, trying to catch her eye.

Once Tony had caught her eye, she waved back at him and began heading towards him, as well.  
"Hi, sorry I'm late. The meeting with legal went on for forever. I thought Harrison would never finish. Am I the last one?" Pepper rambled as she met Tony half way, who had started walking up to er as well to greet her. He was wearing the same black suite like this morning, except he had shed his suit jacket and rolled up the arms.

"No, Alex just texted Rhodey and said he got stuck in a meeting as well and should be here in a few minutes, and Emily is stuck in traffic. The rain, you know?" Tony explained, and casually put a hand on her back to guide her through the crowd. Though the moment Tony placed his hand on the small of her back she noticed how much she had missed those small contacts between them. Yet she tried ignoring the tingle pooling in her lower abdomen, that slowly started spreading through her entire body. To distract herself she pulled out her phone to check whether she had any messages from her boyfriend as well. And she did. When Pepper looked at her phone she really had received a text from Alex as well, saying he'd be running late.

Once they reached the table Rhodey and Tony had picked, Rhodey stood to greet her and gave her a warm hug. Tony pulled her chair out for her and helped her settle, before he sat back down himself, next to Rhodey, facing the crowd, while Pepper had her back to the entrance.  
"Thank you." Pepper said surprised and smiled at him. "Rhodey, how have you been?"

"Good, good. Though this moron over here had me very scared for a moment two weeks ago." He nudged Tony with his elbow, while he in return shrugged and nodded at the same time.

"I guess he had us all scared." Pepper agreed, but they all laughed it off, now that Tony was good and healthy again. "Have you guys ordered already?"

"Drinks. We wanted to wait with the food till everyone has arrived." Rhodey explained.

"Oh ok." Pepper said, somewhat uncomfortable. "I just don't have too much time, I have the next meeting in an hour and I have to get back to Stark Industries. So I will order lunch, if that's alright."

"Of course." Rhodey said and smiled at her. "I guess we can order as well and when Emily and Alex arrive I just wait for them till they're finished. I'm totally free this afternoon."

Right on clue the waitress appeared with a flat white for Tony and a latte for Rhodey. Pepper ordered a cappuccino for herself and a salad, when her phone started ringing.  
"Hey B, sorry I'm running late. I just finished the meeting and I'm on my way. I'll be there in ten minutes. Can your order a milkshake and a caprese panini for me?" He asked her on the phone.

"Don't worry, Alex. I've only been here for a few minutes myself and Emily has yet to arrive, too. Chocolate or vanilla shake?" She asked.

"Doesn't matter. Make a choice. Can't wait to see ya." He finished.

"Alright. Yeah, me too. Bye." She hung up and excused herself to go find their waitress and place Alex's order.  
When she returned to her table Rhodey and Tony were talking about new upgrades and bug fixes for the Warmashine suit, so she sat quietly next to them, not really paying attention to their conversation. Suddenly familiar tones wavered through the cafe and made her ears peak up. It were he first tunes of "Don't stop me now" by Queen. Somehow this song always reminded her of Tony.  
"I love that song." She piped out, more to her self than her company.

Tony's head snapped over at her and Pepper turned bright red. "Excuse me, what did you say?" He asked genuinely.

"Oh nothing of importance. I just said I really like that song." She smiled sheepishly and Tony spiked his ears listening to the tunes wavering through the cafe.

"Isn't it "Don't stop me now" by Queen?" Tony asked, while Rhodey was already humming along.

Pepper nodded, then furrowed her brows. "How do you know? I thought you only listen to ACDC and Back Sabbath."

"That's not true, Pepper. I have told you before, sometimes I listen to other music as well. This one is on your playlist. And I happen to like it very much." He said and smiled at her.

"Besides this one's a classic." Rhodey commented.

"Oh, you're right." Pepper realized. "I haven't listened to my playlist in forever." She said matter of factly, not noticing the weird looks Rhodey and Tony were giving her.

"Why not? Too busy?" Rhodey asked sympathetically, but she realized he had involuntarily hit a nerve right there.

"Well, Alex and I don't really agree in music tastes. He is more about country and folk, which I don't really like and he hates classic rock and pop. So we compromise and don't listen to music when we're together." She sighed a little and shrugged. "And yeah, the rest of the time I'm at work."

"Hold up." Tony interjected. "So you're saying you're basically don't listen to music any more?" He asked in shock.

"No, it's not like that. I listen to the radio in the car or when I'm cleaning my kitchen, but I just don't actively listen to music as much as I did before I met Alex." She tried reassuring them, but she actually was a little sad. Now that she thought about it, she really missed her music, but to be honest it was a small sacrifice for the awesome boyfriend she got in exchange, and she could always listen to her music on her phone or during sports.

"I still think it's weird. I mean I get different tastes in music and stuff, but… making you stop listen, because he doesn't like it…" Tony trailed off, not knowing what to say any further.

"It's not that he doesn't let me listen to it. It's just we can't agree on the same genre… He complains when I'm listening to my stuff and honestly one can only listen to Shanaya Twayn every so often before you go insane…" She defended, but was interrupted by Tony.

"I like your music taste and I'm glad JARVIS discovered your playlist. Just your small obsession with show tunes is slightly concerning." He teased and shrugged matter of factly.

"Shut up, Tony!" She retorted. "No-one forces you to listen to my playlist. And besides Wicket is a freaking, timeless masterpiece."

"True that." Rhodey agreed and toasted to her with his latte.

"It even won a Tony Award." Tony informed Rhodey in a high girly voice, obviously imitating Pepper very badly, earning him a swat on the arm by her. "I should know, it's named after me after all."

"No it's not." Pepper said curtly, looking at Rhodey unnerved. He in return chuckled at their behavior. It was nice seeing them getting along again.  
To be honest at first he had been very worried about the whole Emily situation making things between Tony and Pepper worse, because he too thought it was way too fast having a girl move in with Tony. But Emily was genuinely a nice, pleasant girl to be around and it seemed like her presence actually helped Pepper relax and ease into her own new relationship. And she seemingly was very happy with Alex, while Tony had been actually talking less about himself (or Pepper for the matter) but hat basically raved about Emily. And Rhodey did believe him, when Tony told him how lucky he felt to have found this girl. It really seemed like he was, well maybe not falling in love with her just yet, but at least settling for her.  
Yet, in this nook in a cafe with just the three of them, Rhodey couldn't shake the feeling there was more to their behavior than just new found respect and the lack of guilt tripping. It almost looked like the old spark between them had been reignited.

"If you say so." Tony winked and chuckled at Pepper.

"What does Emily listen to?" Rhodey asked, trying to lighten the mood before the bickering got out of hand.

"Oh gosh." Tony laughed and closed his eyes. "Don't ask." He waved his hand and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"That bad?" Rhodey asked and Pepper looked bemused at Tony, who was mock-upset, trying to suppress a smile herself.

"Just one word and we'll never talk about it again. Boy groups." He concluded and opened one eye.

Rhodey spluttered "You're kidding!"

"No. Take that, Backstreet-Boys, NSYNC. You name it she got it…" Tony took a deep breath as the waitress arrived with their food, Pepper's coffee and Alex's milkshake. Behind her, Alex had made his way over to their table as well.

"Hi, hi, hi everybody." He waved hastily at Rhodey and Tony, before he kissed his girlfriend on the cheek and sat next to her. "Sorry I'm late. The meeting with my general took for ever." He stressed the last to words to emphasize just how upset he's was. "That guy doesn't know when to quit…" He rolled his eyes and took a sip from his milkshake.

"General Meyers?" Rhodey asked knowingly.

"You know it, bro." Alex replied, sighing. "How did the meeting with the pilots go?"

But before Rhodey could answer, Emily appeared behind Pepper and Alex as well.

"Hew." She blew out and moved toward the seat between Tony and Pepper at the end of the table. "Hey everyone! I'm so sorry. Traffic was a mess." After she hung her jeans jacket over her chair she bent to give Pepper a hug. Pepper, who admittedly hadn't expected it awkwardly stood up halfway and returned the hug a little halfheartedly. She proceeded to pat Alex shoulder in greeting and shook Rhodey's hand over the table, since she couldn't reach him from where she stood.  
"Hey Tone." She greeted Tony and he let her kiss him square on the mouth.

Pepper, pointedly trying to not look at the pair while they were kissing, found one of her sun-dried tomatoes very interesting and inspected it intensely.  
What she didn't notice though, because she was too busy looking at a piece of basil, was that Tony didn't even think about helping his girlfriend into her chair.

And though Pepper didn't notice, Rhodey did, but kept it to himself. It was neither the place, nor the time to open a can of worms and seeing how good Pepper and Tony were getting along at the moment, he didn't want to jinx it.

The five of them continued eating, drinking and chatting. Even Tony and Alex seemed to be getting along, albeit they barely really talked to one another.  
Rhodey noticed Pepper had gotten considerably more quiet since Alex and Emily had arrived, though she seemed to listen to their conversations and laughed along.  
At one point Tony described a situation, he Rhodey and Pepper had had years ago. It actually had been the first time they had been together in Vegas. Coincidentally it had been Pepper's first time to Vegas ever. Long story short, Tony had gotten lost and somehow managed to end up butt naked in the lake in front of Bellagio during the water fountain ballet, singing Sinatras _My Way_. That had also been the first of many very elaborated PR nightmares for Pepper Potts. She had actually taken a two week vacation after they returned to LA, which had only actually lasted for two days until Tony hadn't been able to handle it anymore without her and had started calling her every fifteen minutes until she had surrendered and returned to work.

Everyone laughed, and especially Alex nearly cried with laughter. Rhodey noticed though, that Pepper turned red ever so slightly and smiled more to herself than she openly laughed. Also it seemed like she did everything to avoid looking at Tony. Yet when Alex took her hand, she beamed at her boyfriend, and pressed his hand affectionately.  
In this moment it looked like Tony stopped dead in his tracks for a split second, fixated on the other couples joined hands, before he put his smile back on and grinned at his own silly story again.  
Their behavior was so odd to Rhodey. They both looked so happy with their respective partner, yet it was like they couldn't handle seeing the other one being happy. Though it didn't seem like it was jealousy per se, it was more like it was hurting them.

Shortly after they all finished their meals, Pepper got a call from her secretary Bambi, demanding she needed to return, because the New York State Secretary kept calling asking for a few information regarding Stark Tower.  
"Sorry, I have to leave. I really stretched my lunch break and I'm needed at Stark's." She said apologetically and packed her phone back into her handbag, taking her wallet out to pay on her way out.

"Do you need a lift, B?"Alex asked her lovingly, hand gently placed on her forearm. "And don't worry about the meal. I'll pay it."

"Thank you. And no, I'll call Happy to pick me up on my way out." Pepper answered, gently smiling at him. "Stark Industries is in the opposite direction from where you're headed."

"You sure? I don't mind." Alex offered again, while she put on her trench coat.

"I am. I'll see you tonight, though." Pepper said and kissed him gently good bye.

"Pepper, wait." Tony called after her out of the blue, when she had placed her chair back at the table and had taken two steps towards the exit. "I need to go back to Stark Industries, too. You can ride with me. No need to call Happy." He had already stood up and put on his suit jacket, when she saw he was putting his phone away as well. He pressed a quick kiss to his girlfriends mouth, but before he reached Pepper, he turned around to Alex and Rhodey. "Lunch's on me, by the way." And he threw a hundred dollar bill onto the table.

"Good bye to you, too!" Rhodey called after him, mock hurt.

"Where did you park?" Pepper asked as they stepped outside, sadly it hadn't stopped raining.

"Just around the next corner." Tony said and pointed to the far end of their block. "I still can't believe we went to a place, that hasn't got valet-parking." He sighed, but Pepper chuckled. He took the umbrella from her hands and opened it for them to share the small space underneath. He could be a gentleman after all.

"Hey, it was your girlfriend to that wanted to go here." Pepper teased and smiled, before she stepped next to him and huddled herself close to him to avoid getting hit by the downpour.

"I know." Tony sighed dramatically. "The things we do for love…" The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. Tony had meant them metaphorically, funny even, but he wasn't sure whether Pepper took them seriously. It shouldn't affect him either way, but he didn't want it to be weird between him and Pepper again and he didn't want to stir the freaking pot again.

When they spoke next the did it simultaneously.  
"Do you though?" Pepper asked and turned a little pink, looking at the puddles on the pavement.  
"About Stark Tower…" Tony started and they both stopped and looked at each other wide eyed, not sure what to do. After a few awkward moments they both started chuckling.

"You go first." Pepper said, happy to get an escape from the question that had nearly burned her tongue. She wished they weren't in such close proximity, huddled together to fit under the small umbrella. She felt herself flush and was sure Tony must feel the heat suddenly radiating from her body. She honestly didn't even knew why she had asked the question. In all honesty, she really was afraid of the answer, though she wasn't sure what would be worse: Him still not being over her or him actually being in love with the girl. She was torn between the possibilities, though she found herself dreading the idea of him really loving Emily more.

"Ok." Tony himself was happy, he didn't have to answer Pepper's question and too forego the can of worms he had opened himself. "I said I have another idea for Stark Tower."

"Another-one?" Pepper asked, half shocked, half exasperated and stopped suddenly, all thoughts about Emily suddenly leaving her head. This caused Tony to walk past her and she, not expecting it, was hit with the pouring rain. In response she shrieked and ran back up to Tony. "We changed the plans eleven times already. Changing them again is such a pain in the ass… And the board... I'm finally taken seriously by them." She groaned and sounded very exasperated.

"It will be the last change, I promise. I know Stark Tower is your baby, but I want the penthouse to be my penthouse. Also I will talk to the board if that makes things easier for you." He stated.

"Your penthouse? But why? You hate New York." She claimed.

"That's only partly true. For one I think with the Stark Industries location in New York, we need a new home base there, for business trips. The old town house? Not so sexy. It's old, outdated in technical regards and security… Honestly I don't even know why I bought it in the first place… Second, I only hate New York, because of the old town house, but I don't hate New York for itself. I had some of my best childhood moments there… Christmas in the city was always magical…" He trailed off. Christmas and his childhood in general were always very delicate topics for Tony and Pepper knew it. The last Christmas he had spent in new York had been the Christmas before his parents death.

"I know. I always loved Christmas season in New York, too." Pepper told him in a comforting way when the finally reached the car. "My family came to visit me one year and we did the whole touristy thing. Ice skating at Rockefeller Center, sleighing in Central Park and all that stuff… It really is magical."

They were standing next to the passenger seat now, the rain still pouring down on their umbrella, which Tony was still holding in place. "We used to watch this very old movie each and every year." Tony stated and Pepper's breath hitched in her throat. It was the first time since she had known him, that he actually talked about his childhood Christmases and she felt a warmth spread through her body with the thought that he still trusted her so much. "Unfortunately I don't recall its name."

"Maybe JARVIS can look it up for you?" Pepper asked softly, gazing up at him, not wanting to break the spell.

Tony chuckled at the thought. "I don't even remember what it's really about."

"Oh, ok." Pepper laughed awkwardly in return. "You really don't recall any details?"

"There was a man. And a woman. A few women actually. It was in black and white." He answered and really furrowed his brows as if he was in deep thought.

"Wow." Pepper deadpanned. "That's… a lot. Very detailed." She smiled at him, enjoying their banter once and again.

"In my defense that was about 20 years ago." He said mock-hurt.

"Forgive me. I forgot you had Alzheimers. Aren't you supposed to be a genius?" She mocked him further, happy that the mood was light hearted and not sad and dark, what could've happened easily with such an heavy topic like Christmas.

"I am a genius." He said sternly. "That doesn't mean I'm omniscient."

"You always behave like it is…" Pepper mumbled under her breath.

"You wanted a ride, didn't you?" He asked in a mocking tone himself, while opening the door for her. Something he had rarely done for her in the past.

"Happy would be the preferred ride every day." She retorted smiling sweetly at him.

He laughed at her quip. It was real, hearty laugh and to be honest, she had really missed the sound. It was so good to be able to talk to each other again. "Come on get inside." He said as they reached his car and she climbed inside.

* * *

When Rhodey emerged from the cafe as well, he hugged Emily and promised Alex to call him later this week. Both of them headed in the opposite direction than he was. On his way to his car he noticed a couple standing next to a silver Audi R8 Spider, huddled close under an umbrella. The woman was a tall, thin red head, wearing a beige trench coat and the man had black hair and was in a black suit. It took Rhodey longer than he liked to admit, until he noticed it were his two best friends.

Tony was listening to something Pepper was apparently saying and threw his head back laughing, like a little boy.

It seemed like those two could overcome anything. After constantly being at each others throats over the last eight month it looked like the spark between them had been gone for good. But today, on an ordinary Wednesday, in an average cafe he had watched it begin again. And if he wasn't mistaken, and they could claim different as much as they wanted, this thing between them was far from over.

* * *

**Thanks for reading :) I hope it wasn't too cheesy. We're now in the middle of Phase III.  
And here's your sneak peak for next week: **

"It was everything I could have ever asked for." Pepper confirmed and looked down at him. "In fact this hayloft was one of my favorite places. I'd always play here with my brother and when I was sad, I'd come here to think…" She said and smiled in memory.

"One of your favorite?" Tony asked. "What can be better than this?" He pointed up to the hayloft.

"I'll show you." She said and started to climb down.

**Leave a little love :)**


	22. Castle on the Hill

_**I'm also not asking for reviews here. I'm done for today. I'm so confused with ****myself...**_

**_Now:  
_**_**Hello again. I know I'm unnerving you. I unnerve myself, too. **_**_A lot. Anxiety sucks..._**

**_I decided to post 17-22 again, until I decided what to do. Taking them down was an overreaction on my side. And I apologize.  
Though I still don't know/think I'm going to continue this exact plot after Ch. 22. At the moment I feel like I just _****_can't. It's not the reviewers fault!  
_****_My problem is I wrote chapter 23 and 24 already (thats why I have a sneak) and I hated them and rewrote them two times already and still hate them. I feel like I'm stuck, and then people said they got frustrated and discontinue reading and honestly, I realized I am frustrated with the plot too, that's why it didn't work out anymore. I feel like I'm in too deep to get them out again and I hate that. It's like I created the problem, than it got out of hand and now I don't know how to fix it. I'm just... I dunno sad. But not because of your reviews. I know what I want to tell, but I somehow can't. Maybe I'll post the rewrites as sort of a "what/if" spin off. I don't know anymore. For now, you'll get chapter 17-22 back. _**

**_And to make one thing clear, I always have two (unpolished) chapters in my pipeline and every time I update, it's after I wrote a new one. Before I post a new chapter it will get a major walkthrough and sometimes I even rewrite most/big parts. Otherwise the sneaks wouldn't be possible. So yes, I said I wont write until after __Christmas, and that meant: I won't touch 23, 24 until then again, but the main part and plot is already written. _****_Also I didnt want to start on 25 until after Christmas, which has to be written before I put 23 out. _****_But I am unhappy how they turned out, still I included the sneak peak. But like I said, I totally got the reviews and figured out why I hated 23 and 24 so much. It's like a knot I can't untangle...  
If I have a major breakthrough over Christmas I'll let you know. But the more I think about it, I think I'll rewrite the chapters. Until then I'm giving you the old ones back. But For now I need a little time and space to think..._**

**_But one thing: I wanted to thank you to everyone who believes in me and who reviewed, whether it was criticism or cheering me on. I'm not mad at anyone, I am just... stuck. and unhappy with my writing. and lost. mostly lost, I guess :'D_**

* * *

**This Morning:  
Hey everyone!**

**I know this is not a chapter and thus technically not allowed here. But I let you down and I need to apologize.**

**After reading your comments and your critics I reviewed my story. You are right. I decided to not post new chapters for a while. That doen't mean I'm terminating this Story, though I really thought about it. I'm just as frustrated as you guys are with where I was going...Things got so out of hand here, I don't know if I could still do you all justice and I am sorry I didn't realize it sooner. **

**So I decided to rewrite chapters 17-22. The plot will change, it wont be as slowpaced as before. I don't want to disappoint you guys and I want you to be happy. And you are right, they were very OoC. I'm gonna scratch Tony's relationship with Emily out of the story and it will be more Pepper/Tony centered. Also no more fighting and them growing back together more quickly. You wont have your happy relationship ending right away though, but the progress they'll make to get to gether will be much faster. **

**I'm sorry I let you down. But I heard you and I will try to improve in my new attempt. So please stay with me as I try to make this right for you. I will Update with the new chapter 17 on Monday. I promise. I now just need a little faith and a chance to make it up to you all.**

**Thank you.**

* * *

**Chapter 22: Castle on the Hill**

**Hey everyone :)**

**Thanks for your reviews! :) Keep them coming, cause it's Christmas ;-) **

**I doubt I'll be able to post anything next week due to Christmas ****preparations. So this chapter is slightly longer than usual and I threw in a little... Well, you'll see. **

**If I find the time and motivation I might update or make a christmas what/if special related to this Story, but I can't and won't promise it. If I don't: marry christmas everyone and Happy Reading.**

**Song: Castle on the Hill by Ed Sheeran**

* * *

**Castle on the Hill**

She honestly had no idea how she had gotten into this situation. It was just… bizarre.

Pepper Potts was currently sitting in a very comfortable window plane seat in the first class section of an American Airlines Boing 737. The seat next to her was occupied by her loving and loyal boyfriend, Alex. Since they had a night flight he was currently softly snoring and slightly drooling onto his neck pillow.

Finally they were going on their first vacation together, back home to her old parents house in Hill County near San Antonio, Texas. They would go hiking, swimming and tubing in Guadaloupe River, River Walk in San Antonio, Austin, horseback riding, the whole package. Alex would get to see where she grew up and see firsthand how her childhood had looked like. As she looked over at him a loving smile ghosted her lips.

However ,that smile disappeared as soon as she looked over to the seats across from the aisle when she found a pair of chocolate brown eyes staring right back at her.  
As soon as Tony saw she was looking at him, a smug grin appeared on his face, as his girlfriend snuggled deeper into his shoulder.

It took every ounce of her self-control to not jump over Alex and throttle her business partner to death.  
Tony Stark had hijacked their vacation. Like the weasel he was, he just wormed his way into their very little free time together and decided to tag along.  
Ok.. Maybe that wasn't the whole truth, but still.

In fact Alex and Emily had gotten along so well, that Alex had invited Emily and Tony to join their trip, when Pepper and Tony had been on their way back to Stark Industries. The two of them got along so well they sometimes grabbed coffee or even went grocery shopping together, since both Pepper and Tony were too busy to do it themselves. Emily had been all game to accept the invitation and because "Pepper and Tony are such close friends as well, it will be the perfect vacation and downtime for everyone.".

Tony, the annoying child he was, of course saw an opportunity to aggravate the hell out of a certain red head, so he agreed to tag along happily.  
To top it all of, no-one had informed said red head and she only figured it out, when suddenly a very well known billionaire checked in at the airport next to her.

"Surprise." Emily had cheered, while Pepper had been shell shocked.

"I thought our vacation could need a little more people. I hope our surprise worked." Alex had explained and had pressed a kiss to her hair, not even noticing that she was mad. Yes, it had indeed been a surprise. "And you said the house is big enough to house at least 6 people."

"Great." Pepper had just curtly said, like it certainly wasn't a disaster waiting to happen. There was no way this could go easily wrong. Too mad to say anything more, she had just nodded and stormed off to TSA, to get through security and off to the bar right after.

"Can we get another Martini? Extra dry, extra olives?" A voice had come from behind her, as soon as she had finished her first drink. "You ok?" Tony had asked her as he had taken the place next to her, before paying the bar tender. "You looked a little aggravated at check in."

"What are you doing here, Tony?" Pepper had asked exasperated, no even sparing him glance and took a sip from her newly served drink.

"Buying you a drink." He had said matter of factly.

Pepper had snorted, but it wasn't exactly humorous. "Why are you hijacking my vacation?"

"To be honest I had no idea, that you didn't have any clue. Emily proposed the idea of a vacation after our lunch with Rhodey. Apparently she and Alex had talked and he kind of invited her and me to join you two. I thought you'd be alright with it, since it's your parents house we're going to and not his. And now it's too late to back out." Pepper had just rolled her eyes at him, not sure wether he was telling the truth or if he just had wanted to get back on her good side.

"And you really thought it would be ok, to just come with us?" She couldn't believe how stupid this genius was sometimes.

Tony had just shrugged and grinned mischievously. "Suck it up, sour patch. There's nothing we can do about it now." Tony had said and taken a sip from is scotch.

"Yes, you two could go back home." Pepper had spat and returned to where Alex and Emily were roaming duty free shops. Of course she had known she herself wouldn't send Emily and Tony back home. It was a trait Pepper had inherited from her mother, she always had to be the perfect host and would be rude to tell them they couldn't come now. But she could grovel silently about the fact they were tagging along.

When they finally landed at San Antonio International airport it was still dark outside. After they collected their bags, a tall, dark haired guy in his late sixties was already waiting for them. For the first time in over six hours a genuine smile lightened Pepper's features. She handed Alex her carry on bag and nearly ran up to the elderly man.  
He was dressed in stonewashed jeans, a dark blue shirt and held a white stetson in his hand, along with car keys in his other. Pepper hugged him hard and squealed, while the elderly mans face broke into a big smile as well, as he turned the hug whole heartedly.

"Ginger! Long time no see, my little doll." The man said in a deep, smokey and calming voice.

"Uncle Bo. I have missed you so much!" She said when she loosened her grip and took a good look at him. "How's Mimi doing?"

"Ah you know her, always busy, always shooing me around." He laughed and Pepper chimed in. "She expects you to dinner at least once, you know."

"I have expected nothing less." Pepper smiled. "But only if she makes her peach cobbler."

"Still got a sweet tooth I see." Bo chuckled with his deep voice.

"Thank's for picking us all up, Bo." She waved over at the rest of their small group. Her mood had considerably lightened since she had met this guy. "Bo this is Alex, my boyfriend." She kissed Alex on the cheek and the men shook hands, though Alex looked a little frightened. "This is Tony, my Co-CEO… business partner… part time superhero and his girlfriend Emily." Emily was the first to shake his hand, saying how delighted she was to meet him and Bo smiled in return, nodding his head in hello.

"Stark." Bo greeted Tony. "We have heard a lot about you."

"Only good things I hope." Tony chuckled and placed his arm around Emily.

"Depends on when this little doll visited us. Sometimes she wished the devil would come and snatch you. But she always had your back." Everyone chuckled, and Tony looked over at Pepper and saw her cheeks pinked slightly. "I have to say, a lot of people here were very sad when you terminated the weapons manufacturing at Stark Industries."

"Oh." Tony said at a loss for words at how to respond to this, but Pepper came to his rescue.

"Bo, have you seen Larry in the last few month?" She asked and looped her arm through on of his, now moving in the general direction of the parking lot.

"No, we haven't seen your brother since he he got his girlfriend pregnant." Bo stated and shook his had. "But I hope we'll get to meet his small bundle of joy."

"Wait. Jane is pregnant?" Pepper exclaimed.

"Yes, 20th week if I'm not mistaken. We got a copy of the sonogram last week." Bo said happily.

"Jerk. He hadn't told me even one bit." Pepper said annoyed.

"Well, when your older sister is CEO of a fortune 500 company, it's hard to get a hold of her. And this ain't something you want to tell through mail." Alex said from behind them and Bo laughed at how true his words were.

"Traitor." Pepper mumbled, but grinned.

After they placed their bags in the trunk of Bo's pick up they settled into the vehicle.  
Alex on the passenger seat, since he was the tallest, Pepper behind him, Tony in the middle and Emily behind Bo.  
Pepper blamed the sudden heat that cursed through her as Tony settled in next to her, his right side pressed tightly against her left one, on the excitement to see Bo again and to coming home for the first time in nearly 15 years.

"So Bo, you're Pepper's uncle?" Tony asked and bent towards him.

The elderly man chuckled from his seat and and went to answer. "No, I was the chief in the police department Ginny's dad worked for, before he relocated to New York. Though I practically saw her and Larry grow up. Me and her father were very good friends and our families were very close as well. We always hoped Ginny and Mikey, my youngest would end up together and marry some day. He was her high school -"

"That's enough!" Pepper interjected, face bright red. "Bo, you're embarrassing me…" Everyone laughed, but Bo laughed the loudest.

"Ginger, that's my job. With your parents gone I gained the responsibility to make sure you get all the embarrassing moments, one gets to have with parents. Including bragging about the kids former lovers." Pepper in turn just put her face in her hands.

"Do you live on the farm as well?" Emily asked, to save Pepper from further embarrassment.

"No, we just keep an eye on the farm and the livestock there. And when either Pepper or Larry want to visit we make sure everything is in order." He informed and looked at the back row through his rear mirror.

"Why are you calling her Ginger?" Alex asked the driver and looked back at his girlfriend, grinning.

"Have you looked at her hair?" He asked and Tony nearly spluttered with laughter.

"That's one of the reasons her name is now Pepper, instead of Virginia." He informed Bo.  
Now it was Alex who was bright red. Peppe reached out tp touch his shoulder gently and she smiled at him when he turned around to look at her.

About an hour later, after driving through green meadows, hills covered in trees and fields housing cows they finally arrived at their destination.

"I always thought Texas was all desert." Tony exclaimed when he stepped out of the car and stood in front of a beautiful ranch, trees and green, but in some places sun burned grass all around. The fence they had passed stretched so far in all direction you couldn't see the end and to the far right was a small hill with a single tree on top and behind the barn you could see a small pond.

"Wow, Pepper this place is beautiful." Emily said, eyes glazing over.

"Thanks." Pepper said and smiled. She was home now. "And it's not Tony. In the west it mostly is, but here in Hill County it's mostly green."

Bo had finished unloading their bags from the truck with Alex's help and the two of them stepped over to Pepper, Tony and Emily. "Thanks, Honey." Pepper said as Alex handed her her carry on bag. "Bo thank you so much for picking us up and thank Mimi for preparing the house."

"Thank her when you come over for dinner." He replied with a low chuckle. "Here's the keys to the house and here's the keys to the car. I left a list in the kitchen with the instructions regarding the animals. If you need anything, call me. We're not far away." He handed Pepper two pairs of keys and shook hands with Tony and Alex and hugged Emily. He then hugged Pepper, very tight and very long. "Welcome home, Ginger."

When Bo was gone, like a true cowboy he rode his horse, Chester home, Pepper looked at the rest of the group and Tony noticed her eyes were a bit teary.

"You ok, B?" Alex asked, but Pepper smiled and nodded.

"Let's get settled, what do you think?" She said and grabbed her luggage, dragging it towards the door. When they entered they stepped into a black and white, very modern but true to the Texan style entrance hall. "My brother renovated everything after my parents died." She explained and marveled at how the place had turned out. "Ok, on this level we have the kitchen, living room, dining hall and a small bathroom. In the far back is also the door to the patio and the pond. I'll show you around later if you want to. Upstairs are three bedrooms, with a master bathroom to each. And the study and library. I'll show you your room." Pepper said the last part to Tony and Emily.

"Alex, our room is the one on the far right. Tony, Emily, yours is the one on the left."

When Tony entered his room he was greeted by white, wooden walls, a kingsized water bed in a rich dark brown frame and dark wooden dressers with a cream colored rug and a leather armchair. The bathroom was small, but it housed a claw footed bathtub and a large sink. The floor was dark wood as well with white rugs.

"Wow." Emily exclaimed. "That's so beautiful." She went over to the window and noticed they were overlooking the barn and the pond. A few horses were munching on some hay behind the barn.

"Yes it is." Tony answered and looked at her. She really looked beautiful, the genuine smile that lighted her face making her even more irresistible, and the room seemed to complement her features even further, her dark brown hair and eyes fit perfectly into the interior, yet something was off. It was like this girl, who had never been outside New York City didn't belong here, like she didn't _deserve_ to be here. "You want to unpack now and then stroll around a bit?" Tony asked her.

"Unpacking sounds good, but I fear I have to take a nap afterwards. I'm exhausted." She tried stifling a yawn, but grabbed a bag and started unpacking. After they were finished she flopped down on the bed and yawned again.

"Do you want me to stay?" Tony asked.

"No, I come find you when I'm awake." She smiled sleepily at him and Tony chuckled. Before he left the room, he placed a kiss to her forehead and wished her a good rest. He wasn't exactly happy to leave her, but he wasn't keen on staying with her either. He really came to like her over the last few month. He was even ready to say he was well over Pepper and that his plan to make her jealous had turned into something even better, that he truly had found someone he could stick to. But the feeling he had had when he had watched her in this room had just been plain odd.

When Tony arrived downstairs he saw Pepper standing on the patio, looking over the big yard and observing the horses in the distance. Instead of her boyfriend style jeans and dark blue hoody from the flight, Pepper was now dressed in jeans shorts and a navy-white striped t-shirt.#  
"I had no idea you really had a ranch." Tony spoke up and Pepper's head snapped towards him, looking at him a little startled.

"This is hardly a ranch." She remarked, but smiled. "We don't really had livestock, except for a few horses and four chickens."

"This place is huge, and you have a barn. Ranch it is." Tony persisted. "I had no idea you really were a country girl." He said bemused and tried picturing a little version of Pepper with red pigtails, overalls and gumboots, running around collecting eggs and grooming a giant horse.

"I was, until I moved to New York." She humored him. They continued staring at one another, neither sure what to say.

As silence got a little awkward Tony looked around and noticed he had no idea where anything was. "Care to give me a tour?" He asked nonchalantly.

"Uhm, sure, but don't we want to wait up for Emily?" She asked and looked over to the living room entrance.

"Yeah, we can wait up, but she lay down for a bit so it might take a while…" Tony shrugged awkwardly again.

"Alex took a nap, too. Although he slept the entire flight." Pepper giggled. "They're not accustomed to our jet set lifestyle, are they?" Pepper joked, still laughing.

Tony laughed as well and nodded. "Looks like a couple of hours in an airplane is too much for them."

"I was going to go and see how the horses are doing, if you want to join." She offered.

"Oh boy." Tony sighed. "You know how I feel about horses."

"Don't worry, they are very well behaved. Bo trained them personally and they are all relatively old and chill, especially Mildred." She smiled and started descending the steps towards the barn.

"You didn't honestly name a horse Mildred?!" He asked appalled.

"I didn't. My brother did." She explained.

"I have to meet her!" And Tony was rushing towards the paddock where the horses were munching on some grass. When he reached the fence of the paddock two horses, a light brown one and a white and brown spotted one moved to him, curious to meet the new human. "Wow," Tony said and backed up immediately. "okay, okay. I mean no harm."

"They just want to greet you." Pepper said from behind him. She stepped up toward the fence and offered her hand to the horses to smell at, showing they meant no harm. After the two had sniffed her hands, she carefully patted their long noses. "You can pat them, but be slow and gentle. And don't be afraid." She encouraged Tony, who stood now a bit behind her in safe distance.

"You sure? They might want to eat me." He asked wearily.

"They won't eat you, they're herbivores, Tony." She chuckled, while continuously petting one of the horses. As Tony stepped cautiously closer, she turned to the brown and white horse and spoke to her. "Mildred, meet Tony. Be gentle, it's the first time he meets a real horse." She then stepped a bit to the side to let him carefully reach out to Mildred and let her sniff his hand, before gently touching her. "It isn't that bad, is it?" She asked and smiled, now petting the brown horse as to more horses made their way over to them.

"No it's no-" Tony tried to say, as Mildred suddenly snorted. He nearly jumped out of his skin and the horse startled, startling all the other horses as well, making them run away. "No! Come back! I'm sorry, I just startled. Come back please." He called after them, but Mildred was already on the other side of the paddock, the other horses hot on her heels.

Pepper was crying with laughter, holding her sides.

"Not funny." Tony flatly told her.

Pepper tried saying something, but she couldn't, because she couldn't stop laughing.

"You can help me fill up their hay in the barn." She said still giggling a few minutes later. Pepper climbed up the hay loft and Tony caught what she threw down.

"This place must have been like a giant adventure playground as a kid." Tony remarked in awe. He was actually a little jealous. Sure he had had every toy a kid could have ever wished for, but he grew up in the city. He always had to play inside or at the playground across the street with one of his nannies. Also from a very young age, his parents had decided to advance his genius. He started boarding school when he was very little and started studying at university when he was just eleven years old. He never had the freedom or the space to explore and get dirty and just be a kid. And he really envied Pepper for the opportunity.

"It was everything I could have ever asked for." Pepper confirmed and looked down at him. "In fact this hayloft was one of my favorite places. I'd always play here with my brother and when I was sad I'd come here to think…" Se said and smiled in memory.

"One of your favorite?" Tony asked. "What can be better than this?" He pointed to her.

"I'll show you." She said and started to climb down.  
When they stepped back outside again the sun was almost at its peak ad Pepper and Tony started wandering toward the hill with the tree, Tony had seen from the living room. After a couple of minutes he spoke.

"Seriously Pepper, how big is this property." He said a little out of breath. Pepper just chuckled in return, while the they were passing a few trees with a tire swing tied to one.

"You guys even have a tire sling." He exclaimed staggered and stopped dead in his tracks. "Of course you have a tire swing."

"Feel free to use it." Pepper offered.

"Won't you join me?" Tony asked as he took place on one side of the tire.

"Nah, thanks. I broke my arm when I was six on this thing. Since then I'm not very fond of it." She waved off and stood to the side watching him working to swing as high as possible.

"What happened?" Tony called over to her, panting a little from the effort to swing.

"Tony, be careful. This thing is very old, I don't…" But before she could finish the sentence a very loud crack echoed through the air and both of them looked up to the branch the swing was hanging an. Though it still looked stable, Tony curbed the swing and got off very carefully. As he was back next to her they started walking toward the tree on the hill again.

"So how did you break your arm on that thing? I assume you fell?" He asked.

"Yeah. The second oldest son of Bo and Mimi, along with his youngest son and my brother had chased me and I fled to the swing. The guy pushed me and I went higher and higher. He ignored me when I begged him to stop. Eventually I couldn't hold on anymore and fell down. I think I actually flew a few yards through the air, but ever since I haven't been on any swing." She shrugged and smiled.

"That boy sounds like a cunt." Tony remarked. He could only imagine how it must feel like to beg the bully to stop and be totally powerless and in the end ending up hurt because of him.  
Pepper started giggling like crazy out of the blue and was bright red, burning her face in her hands.  
"What?" Tony asked and couldn't help but grin. Her laughter was infectious and he now realized how much he had missed its sound.

Pepper coughed uncomfortable but grinned knowingly. "Actually, he was also the boy I had my first kiss with a few years later." She confessed.

"You know now you have to spill." Before she could object or say anything Tony added: "You brought this up, so now I need to know the whole story." He held up his hands in defense.

"All right, all right." Pepper yielded. "I was fifteen - nearly sixteen actually - and it was my dads 45th birthday. He did a barbecue. My parents always thought I had a crush on Bo's youngest son Mikey, because I loved going over to their house and he is only a year older than I am and we hung out all the time. What no-one knew was, that I actually only hung out with Mikey, because I had a huge crush on Shane, one of his older brothers. Shane was eighteen at the time." Tony followed every word she said. It was fascinating to learn about her past and even more fascinating to see the always very private Pepper Potts open up. And Tony always enjoyed watching her squirm.  
"After dinner the kids would normally go play in the yard, you know have fun and stuff. Since we were about 15 kids in total, me and my brother, 4 of Bo's sons, cousins and other friends kids we decided to play hide and seek."

"Oh I can imagine, you two picked the same hiding spot and in the dark of the night, full moon, fireflies…" Tony said mockingly.

"Not quite, but we actually have fireflies around here." She pointed her finger around. "Though I did pick a hiding spot, which was already occupied, so much's true. But it turned out Shane actually hadn't had any interest in playing hide and seek…"

"Ew gross, Pep. That's very, very wrong…" Tony said totally yucked out. She had only been 15 at that time.

"No! No. Oh god no. I was only 15 back then. Who do you take me for?" Pepper said and started laughing again. "He was mainly hiding to smoke." Tony's eyebrows raised in understanding.  
"Anyways, silly fifteen year old me, being head over heels in love with that guy thought he was so cool."

"So you, little Miss Sunshine and always picture perfect daughter smoked with him." Tony finished her sentence.

"I did." Pepper confirmed.

"Naughty..." He said and nodded appreciatively.

"It were very cheap, hand-rolled cigarettes. Never had I felt more sick or lightheaded in my entire life. It had been the first time and honestly the last time I have smoked a cigarette. But I was young and in love. Until my brother came close to us and Shane suggested to flee and we did, coming here." Pepper said and they had finally reached their destination. The branches of the tree were massive and hanging low, some even reached the ground. The crown of the tree was thick and heavy with big, green leaves, you couldn't even see the stem.

"You hid behind the tree?" Tony asked, not really sounding impressed.

"Look closer." Pepper said and nodded towards the tree.

Tony walked in between the branches, it felt like walking through a curtain made of leaves. Once he had reached the inside of the leaf canopy, he saw wood nailed to the stem, leading upward like a ladder. In between the branches of the crown was a treehouse. Not very big, but it could easily fit 4 people and had a small balcony, which was facing away from the property, overlooking the hill to the other side.

"Wow." Tony said astounded. "Can we go up?" Tony asked and turned to Pepper who had stepped inside the leaf-curtain as well.

"We can, but I left the key for the house it self back in the house." Pepper said. "But you can go up to the patio."

"This place is amazing." Tony confessed, once again when he reached the top. Marveling at the view in front of him he sat down and Pepper sat next to him, legs dangling from the platform. The view they had over the fields and the hills in the distance was partly blocked by leaves, yet still amazing.

"It is. And it is mine. My dad built it for me and my brother never came up here without permission." She smiled fondly and looked over at Tony. He really looked in awe and more peaceful than she had ever seen him.

"So you two just sat here and hid from the other kids, smoking?" Tony asked once he noticed she had been staring at him.

"Basically." She confirmed. "He then confessed I was cooler than he thought and just kissed me. It was my first kiss and I had no idea what I was doing. I fear it had been very bad." Pepper laughed again, feeling awkward.

"You are anything, but bad at it. Believe me." It was out before he knew what his mouth was doing.

She didn't know what she should say or do. The army of butterflies had returned to her stomach and she felt like she was fifteen all over again.

"Uhm, I'm sorry… You know… I didn't mean to…" Tony started rambling and she desperately wanted to shut him up it the most delicate way. And then he stared at her with his chocolate brown eyes, chocolate meeting sky blue. And he too, wanted nothing more than to recreate her story and just kiss her. They stared at each other for a long moment. He was searching her face for the smallest sign of doubt, and when he didn't find one, he finally-

"Sorry, I... I totally zoned out." She stammered, realizing what she was about to do.

"We should go back. I guess Emily is awake. And Alex will be hungry. I'm hungry, too." Tony said and stood up. Still he couldn't help himself and offered his hand to help her up. And to his and her surprise she actually took it.

"I like it." Tony offered before they reached the main-house again, Emily was already sitting on the porch, sipping a lemonade waving at them.

"What?" Pepper asked confused.

"I like your castle in the tree on the hill."

* * *

**This was the sneak peak: **

"I'll go after hi-" Emily started, but Pepper cut her off.

"No. I think you already did enough." She snapped at her angrily.

**I'm also not asking for reviews here. I'm done for today. I'm so confused with ****myself... **


	23. Question Marks?

**Chapter: 23 Question Marks**

**Hello Everyone!**

**First of all I have to say: big big Thank you to mrsstark83! You are truly my rock here and always there for me! Thank you so much. I think it's also safe to say, you basically beta read this chapter for me. **

**Second: Thank you so much for your support and patience every one. I'm blown away. I can't even comprehend how awesome you guys are. And I can't put in words how grateful and humbled I feel.  
Thanks to you guys I - and I mean every single one of you - I decided to continue this story. I read each and every comment and I appreciate your ideas and I will keep them in mind while writing and incorporate them when they fit my general idea of the story line. **

**Third: I am not rewriting the chapters I had so far. But I'll alter the plot I had in mind for the rest. Unfortunately that means, I got rid of a lot of drafts I had so far. So I will not be able to update every week, since I am now basically starting/continuing from scratch. I hope you understand. I try to update every other week though, that means I try to upload the next chapter on January 28th. If I am faster, I'll update earlier. **

**Fourth: I want to answer one of the questions from the comments by a guest named Ruth: I can give you a date for the next update: Today, Baby ;-) **

**Enjoy! **

**Song: Question Marks by Sunrise Avenue**

* * *

**Question Marks**

The rest of their first day in Texas was mainly spent in peace, relaxing outside.  
Pepper and Emily whipped up a shitload of homemade lemonade, thanks to Mimi and Bo the fridge had been very well stocked with the necessary basics. Alex and Tony volunteered to drive to the next H-E-B to buy some meat and beer for a barbecue. Come on, they were in Texas after all.

Problem was neither Alex, nor Tony did barbecue very often back at home and they had trouble starting the grill.  
"You guys need help?" Pepper asked as she stepped out on the porch, salad bowl in hand, Emily trailing behind her with plates and silverware.

"No, we're good." Tony said through gritted teeth, poking the charcoal with a stick.

"Yes, the grill will be ready in no time." Alex confirmed and held up his thumb and a bottle of lighting fluid in the other hand.

"You know there's an easier way of starting a grill?" Pepper said and tried to hide her teasing smile.

"Of course you would know, country girl…" Tony said and Alex shot her glare as well.

"Excuse me, I didn't quite get that." Pepper said teasing them again.

"Nothing, nothing." Alex stepped in quickly. "Just finish the side dishes, and we'll have the grill on in no time." He said reassuringly and ushered the girls back into the house, after they put down the things they were holding.

"Don't set my house on fire." Pepper warned over her shoulder. "I doubt we'll be eating very soon." She said to Emily, when they were back in the kitchen.

Preparing the food with her had actually been fun and she figured, she got along with Emily better than she had thought.

"Good thing we have the rest of the food here with us." Emily said and chuckled, grabbing a piece of bread and shoving it in her mouth. "God I'm starving."

"Yeah me too." Pepper admitted and took a piece of bread herself. "So how do you like it here?" She asked Emily, leaning against the counter. "Tony told me you never left New York before."

"Yeah, my parents weren't exactly loaded and so I couldn't afford to go to college in another state so I stayed and lived at my parents home during nursing school. Afterwards I got a job in the hospital I did my practical year in. So I never had a reason to leave New York, actually." She said and took another bite of her piece of bread. "But I love this place. This house and property is so beautiful. Though it's more humid than I would have thought." She confessed and laughed.  
Pepper laughed along and turned to try and take a look out of the window to see if the grill was on by now.  
"So what have you planned for the next few day's?" Emily asked Pepper.

Pepper was a bit taken aback by the question. Emily didn't honestly think the four of them would spent every minute together, did she? Yes, she had been invited along by her boyfriend, but she sure couldn't expect they would be spending all their time with Alex and her.  
"Uhm, we wanted to go hiking and maybe take the horses and go riding, maybe go to Austin for one day. Otherwise we haven't planned anything yet. What about you?" She asked carefully, maneuvering the ball in her court.

"I guess Tony wants to relax mostly. But if it's alright we may like to tag along on the horse riding?" Emily asked hopefully. "I'm sorry by the way." Emily said suddenly out of the blue.

"What for?" Pepper asked, for the second time taken aback.

"I had no idea Alex hadn't talked to you about inviting us. I wouldn't have come, if I had known you didn't want us here. But I only figured it out when we got here. I thought you had just been tired at the airport and only then Tony told me." Emily apologized.

Pepper smiled sadly at her, getting were she was coming from and sighed.  
"It's not that I don't want you here, it was just… this is mine and Alex first vacation together as a couple, you know? And like you said, I had no idea you and Tony would be joining us. And me and Tony hadn't been on the best terms those last month, to be honest, so I wasn't really thrilled to have him join us. But now I have to admit, being here together might actually be fun." She tried reassuring her.

"I had no idea." Emily admitted. "He always speaks so highly of you and the first time I visited him in Malibu, he couldn't shut up about you and what you had done for him and all. For a moment I was worried he had a crush on you." She said and laughed.

Pepper was happy she had her back turned to her again, trying to see their boyfriends, because she was afraid her face might be a dead give away about how close Emily had come to figuring out the truth. "But then he showed me I don't have to worry about anything." She said suggestively and laughed seductively to herself.

Crash.

She didn't know why hearing it shocked her so much, but not-so-coincidentally Pepper dropped the bowl with artichoke dip she had just picked up and it shattered on the floor. She knew Emily and Tony had had sex, she wasn't dumb and she had seen how Tony got his reputation first hand. Hell she had had awesome sex with Alex as well. But she did not need further confirmation or hear details from his girlfriend. Yes, Emily was nice, but they weren't this close. "Upps." Emily sing-songed cheerfully and grabbed a cloth to clean up the mess.

"Upps." Pepper breathed out, while trying to get a grip again.

"So what happened, that you two fought?" Emily asked while she was cleaning up the dip from the floor.

Pepper, now biting her lip, wishing she hadn't said anything in the first place, frantically thought about something she could tell her. _"Oh you, know your boyfriend fell in love with me, before he met you, but I was to afraid to reciprocate the feelings, though I was madly in love with him too, so he threw a jealous rage fit and we somehow ended up hurting each other really bad, nearly crawling our eyes out and your relationship with him, is probably just a result of his jealousy"_ probably wasn't the best thing to tell Emily.  
"We… uhh… Iron Man…" Was all she ground out. God, she was bad at lying and she knew it. "We fought about Iron Man." She just vaguely stated.

"Oh, I totally get it." Emily said, interrupting Peppers ramble and threw the cloth into the sink, now a little aggravated. "I mean, I know I should be grateful for Iron Man and all, I mean he saved me, but I hate that Tony is constantly putting himself in danger. Which is so unnecessary, by the way. America can protect itself just fine, I don't get why he's has to put himself out there. And every time he comes back bruised and hurt and I don't even know what he's doing when he's out there. To me it totally seems like he just does it to boost his ego. Does recklessness give him a kick or what?" Emily rambled and rambled on about how sick she was about Iron Man and it took about five minutes for Pepper to get a word in.

"On how many missions has he been since you are together?" Pepper asked, and wondered when Tony had been on missions.

"Two." Emily said and looked even more unnerved now. "Two! Two missions in three month! Can you believe it? One right after his recovery and another one, a day or two after our date with Rhodey. I always thought his alter ego would only matter once or twice a year-"

Suddenly Pepper shrieked when she saw a big fire ball emerge from the patio. She immediately ran past Emily and outside to where the guys were prepping the grill. Luckily nothing had caught fire, but the guys looked very guilty and Alex had a bit of soot on his forehead.  
"What the hell happened?" Pepper asked, her mood somewhere between laughing at them and ripping their heads off.

"Well…" Alex started not sure what to say, as to not fuel her anger.

"We… just…" Tony tried to help, but he didn't know what to say either. He knew they both had screwed up, there was no sugar coating it. They both looked so guilty, Pepper was now more amused than actually angry. Also nothing had really happened, no-one was harmed why be mad?

"Spit it out." She demanded though, to teach them a lesson.

"I think we overdid the lighter fluid…" Alex said with a sigh and Tony nodded with guilt.

"Are you admitting now you two have no idea how to light a charcoal grill?" Pepper asked them, but they knew there was no room for further denial. They nodded.  
"Say it." Pepper demanded.

"We have no idea how to light a grill." They said in unison.

"Ok, make way." Pepper said and took the matches and lighter fluid from Alex. "I'll show you." Pepper took the coals out of the grill and put them in a metal bucket with holes in it, which hung on the side of the grill and placed it in the grill. With the matches she lit the - already thoroughly soaked with lighter fluid - coals in different places through various holes. The charcoal caught fire immediately and kept burning. "This, guys is a chimney starter. Once the charcoals are white, carefully open the bottom with this lever here and distribute the charcoals evenly in the grill. Got it?" The nodded. "Great, I'm gonna grab drinks. What do you guys want?"

After dinner they all agreed to go horse riding on one day over the course of the next week. Well the didn't actually agree, since Tony was afraid of horses, but Emily had begged him for so long, he had eventually caved and agreed. But he had only agreed under the condition, that he would get to ride Mildred.  
They continued their evening with drinking beer and casually talking about each and everything. The sun hat already set behind the house.  
Pepper turned on some fairy lights that were placed in the bushed around the patio and they even saw a few fireflies now and then. When time neared midnight Pepper was so tired she could barely stay awake, but she didn't want to go to bed either. It was weird going to bed with her boyfriend, while Tony would be going to bed with his girlfriend just across the hall.  
What she didn't know, Tony didn't want to go to sleep either. The idea of sleeping next to Emily, in the house Pepper had grown up, seemed wrong. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy sleeping next to - or with, for the matter - Emily, there was just a small voice in the back of his head, telling him he shouldn't have come here in the first place. Or at least, it should have been only him and Pepper. Under different circumstances.  
In the end Emily nodded off against his shoulder and Pepper's sat opposite of him with heavy eyes as well, when Tony finally called it a night. He gently shook Emily awake, who stirred and yawned.

Both pairs went upstairs and bid their good nights in the hallway. Before Pepper closed her door though, she saw Tony close his door as well and their glances met each other. Tony smiled apologetic, almost sadly at her, but before Pepper could react or even understand what she had just seen, Tony had shut the door already. Did she dare to say there was still longing in his eyes? And did she dare to say, she wanted nothing more than to make the longing go away?

"B? You ok?" Alex asked from behind her.

"Yes. Sorry," Pepper said and snapped out of her thoughts, blinking a few times. "I just thought I… uh saw something." She finished and shut their door as well.

Alex changed first and was already in bed before she even went into the bathroom to brush her teeth. Pepper deliberately took way longer to get ready for bed, one because she needed to get this day and Tony out of her thoughts and second she hoped when she'd emerge Alex would already be asleep. She just needed a few minutes to herself after this day.

* * *

It was the fourth day of their vacation and Pepper was up before anyone else. It was still dark out, but she enjoyed working in the kitchen alone. It felt homely to her. But not only was she at peace here, the kitchen had always been the place where her mother had worked small miracle for their meals and being alone for once, in one of the places her mother had hold dearest, felt like she could almost sense her there. She prepared the sandwiches for the day, carefully placing them in one of the saddle bags, which were laying on the kitchen table.

Once she had packed everything into the bags, she grabbed herself a cup of coffee.  
A glance at her watch told her the sun would start rising in about 10 minutes, so she decided to step out onto the patio. She had always loved sunrises, especially cloudy ones, when the sky painted all colors onto the skies. A sunrise always was like a new beginning. A brand new day, a new chance.  
Pulling her grey sweater, which she had thrown over one of Alex's t-shirts, tighter around her body she stepped outside, her bare feet feeling the wooden planks of the patio beneath her. It wasn't cold, but goosebumps erupted all over her bare legs, as a small breeze started to play around her. She leaned herself against the beam next to the stairs leading onto the grass and enjoyed the last traces of twilight, and took a sip from her coffee cup.

Tony woke when he heard the back door shut. Emily was still sound asleep on his chest, her hair spilled all over him. Straining his ears he couldn't make out any other noises out.

"J, time." He said quietly into the darkness and his mobile phone lit up, while JARVIS voice quietly told him it was 6:42 am, just a few minutes before sunrise. Noticing how thirsty he was, he untangled himself carefully from his girlfriend and made his way down to the kitchen. The first thing he noticed was that it already smelled like coffee in the kitchen and really did found coffee waiting for him. He then remembered hearing the back door shutting and with a cup in hand, he went to investigate in the living room.  
When he reached the living room he saw Pepper standing outside. Her red hair hung in waves down her back, vibrant against a grey knitted sweater. He legs were bare, except for the hem of a black pair of loose fitting shorts, that peaked out under the hem of her sweater. She had her shoulder leaned against the beam next to her and just stared out into the twilight.

It was one of the most breathtaking views he had ever seen, and he wished time would stop. He just wanted to stay here forever, just taking in the sight of her.

Then, just before the first ray of sunlight made its way over the hill a voice behind her spoke.  
"What are you doing up?" Tony's voice sounded from behind her, thick with sleep.

She turned around and saw him standing in the doorway, that led into the living room. He was wearing blue crossed boxer shorts and a grey t-shirt, his feet also bare. His hair was messed up and stuck adorably in all directions.  
"Wait a second." She told him and returned to looking at the hill. "But from where you are standing, you're missing the best part." She remarked.

He stepped forward, out from under the canopy and stood next to her, leaning his right shoulder onto the other beam, mirroring her position.  
And there it was. The first ray of sunlight that morning. It beamed over the hill, through the clouds, bathing them and everything around them in rich, golden-red sunlight. The sky, now a mixture of dark blue with white stars right above them, and red, pink and gold right in front of them, was just breath taking. Never in his life had Tony seen anything akin to this. And he lived on a house on a cliff overlooking the ocean, so he had seen some spectacular sunsets in his life.  
The light made Pepper's hair and form glow. She looked like she wasn't from planet earth, but more like a celestial. The sun suddenly was just pale compared to her and the colors around them seemed to take a bow before their queen.

"Wow" He muttered, not able to take his eyes off her.

"I know," she admitted. "it's just breathtaking." Then she looked at him and smiled. And it was one of those rare, genuine smiles he hadn't seen very often these days on her.  
When she looked at him he looked so in awe it sent shivers down her spine. And to be honest she was afraid what it meant for her. Yet she couldn't help herself, but smile at him. She hadn't felt so happy, so at peace in forever.

"Pep, I…" Tony started, but couldn't say anything else. He was too afraid to say something wrong, he might as well spill everything he had ever thought about her right here and now. And he was glad he didn't, because Emily appeared behind him with a cup of coffee for herself and put her arms around his waist from behind.

"Awww, I missed it." She said and slipped her hand in Tony's. "Why didn't you wake me?" She asked him a bit scoldingly.

Never in his life had his heart dropped when a beautiful woman raked herself around him and brought him coffee, but in this moment it annoyed him to no end. Pepper on the other hand ignored the couple for the most part and continued looking over the landscape, sipping her own coffee.  
"Because you looked like you needed sleep. We have an exciting day before us." Tony stated, looking briefly at her, making clear he didn't want to discuss the topic any further.

"I'm gonna wake Alex. We wanted to go early, to avoid the afternoon heat, didn't we?" Pepper said and moved past them, placing her cup in the kitchen.

* * *

Not an hour later, all four had quickly eaten breakfast, all of them dressed in jeans and t-shirts, and saddled four horses. Pepper had assigned each of them a horse, fitted their saddles and had shown them how to prepare the horse, before saddling them.  
Tony got Mildred, Alex got Ernest, a black gelding, with a very gentle persona, Emily got Paul, one of the oldest and smallest horses, which was white in the back and brown in the front and Pepper took Pearl. Pearl was a black stallion with a black wavy mane. He once was the foal of her old horse Nugget, but Nugget had to be put down a few years ago after she broke her leg.  
If one had told Tony two weeks ago Pepper could ride horses, a stallion none the less, like she had done it every day of her life, he would have laughed in their face. But the way she rode in front of them and even went back and forth between Tony, Emily and Alex looked like she belonged on a horse back.

"You doing ok?" Tony heard her ask Emily behind him, as the two woman rode next to each other.

"Yeas, this is so much fun!" Emily exclaimed excitedly. "But can we try to go a little faster, too?" She asked.

Pepper laughed slightly. "Once we're out of this woods, we can try, if you guys can trot. Alex how's Ernest?" She asked and let Pearl walk slower to fall back behind Emily.

"He's so gentle, and behaves perfectly fine. And honestly B, this countryside is just gorgeous." He observed and Pepper beamed at him.

In the front Mildred neighed a bit and started to trot. "Uhhh, Pep!" Tony called out.  
"Pep, help." Panic laced his voice as Mildred got faster with every passing second and Pepper spurred Pearl on and galloped past him, effectively blocking Mildreds way and getting her to slow down.

"Shhh, shhhh. It's alright girl." She told the horse soothingly and grabbed the reins, calming the horse. "What happened?" She asked Tony gently.

"Something rustled in the bushes and she just took off." He tried explaining. "I couldn't get her to stop. Although I tried everything you told us."

"I guess she got scared." Pepper told him and let go of the reins again, as Mildred seemed to have calmed down.

Emily and Alex caught up with them and they continued out of the woods. The ground now was sandy and littered with rocks in various sizes. In the distance flew a small river. "Are you ready to try and go a little faster?" Pepper asked. Everyone, even Tony, although with a great deal of respect and reservation agreed to try going trot and even gallop. They followed down the river for about two more miles until they reached a shallow riverbed with big rocks and trees.

"Perfect." Pepper exclaimed to herself.

"Is it save to swim?" Alex asked and took off his shoes. Him, Tony and Emily all went for a quick dip, while Pepper, never very font of swimming in open waters, set up their lunch and watered the horses.

They all munched on their sandwiches, talking about the landscape and their vacation so far.

"Pepper, when nobody lives on this farm anymore, how comes you still have so much livestock?" Alex asked after a while.

"Bo and Mimi don't have the space to keep many animals. They can only fit one horse and their two dogs on their property, so my dad let Bo keep some animals on our property. We kept that agreement after both my parents died and in exchange they look after everything and make sure everything is in order. So not all livestock belongs actually to us. Paul here for example" She pointed to the brown and white horse, Emily rode, "actually belongs to Bo."

"I'd love to live here." Tony said surprisingly. "It's so beautiful here and I think I'd like to have a farm, some chickens, even my own horses."

"You'd be bored out of your mind." Emily said, before anyone else got a chance.

"I could still tinker. I'd rebuilt the barn and make it a workshop. Robotic farming machines, animal feeders and stuff." He replied and his mind started working out plans to help Bo make things easier and more efficient.

"Oh that would be so great, but your ego would suffer too much." Emily said and failed at sounding sarcastic. She tried to laugh it off, but neither Alex not Pepper joined her.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Tony asked, a little ticked off.

"You don't have a crowd to see and applaud you, when you use your Iron Man suit. You'd miss your audience called LA. But I'm the first one who'd be happy if you'd finally quit your hobby." She said and tried, but failed to sound matter of factly and like it was obvious.

"You really think I only use my suits just for fun?" Tony asked Emily shocked and suddenly the air between them thickened.

"I know you sometimes put it to good use, like you did in New York, but most of the time no-one has an idea why Iron Man was seen over LA, so what else would you use it for?" Emily tried deflecting, but Pepper noticed Tony got angrier every second.

"Why do you think I come home bruised and sometimes injured home? Because I like to get my ass kicked?" Tony all but spat at his girlfriend. Pepper knew Emily had hit one of his sweet spots.

"No, I don't think that you like to get your ass kicked, I just think you're irresponsible and lack carefulness. It's the same with your palladium poisoning. You were not careful while tinkering and poisoned yourself." So he hadn't told her about the true source of the poison either, Pepper noticed. "I just think you get yourself in trouble with the suit, when it's not necessary. America can defend itself very well, all you do is stroke your ego with these "missions" of yours." Emily was not very defensive, but unknowingly made things worse. And she actually used air-quotes for the word missions, with made Tony actually see red.

"I don't have to sit here and listen to your accusation, while you have no idea what you're talking about." Tony was close to exploding, Pepper could tell, but he couldn't argue with her without giving everything away, and he wasn't ready to share all the information with her yet.

Before anyone could move a muscle he was on his feet and on Mildreds back, galloping away, back toward the farm.

"Tony!" Pepper called after him, but he was already gone.

"I'll go after hi-" Emily started, but Pepper cut her off.

"No. I think you already did enough." She snapped at her angrily. "Maybe you should try to read and get to know your boyfriend and Iron Man little better, before you fling words around." She said while standing up, shutting off Emily effectively. "Alex, I'm sorry, but I think…"

"I understand. Go." He encouraged her and helped her get onto Pearl's back.

"Thank you." Pepper said, but didn't only mean him helping her up and smiled lovingly at him, before taking off.

Back at the farm she found Mildred tied to the fence behind the barn, but Tony was nowhere to be found. Not in the house or the barn or anywhere else on the property. But as she turned to go back inside to call JARVIS she remembered something. _"In fact this hayloft was one of my favorite places. I'd always play here with my brother and when I was sad I'd come here to think…" _Her own words rang in her ears as she remembered their conversation from a few days ago. Deciding she might as well try her luck she headed back to the barn calling his name. But he didn't answer. Yet when she climbed up the ladder, she found him sitting at the far end under the small round window, leaning against a hay roll staring into the void.  
"Are you alright?" She asked softly and moved towards him.

"People never seem to get it." Tony said calmly, not looking at her.

"What do people not get?" She asked gently.

"Me." He simply stated and continued staring onto the wall. But Pepper waited patiently for him to continue. "Iron Man." Another long pause passed before he continued. "Even you don't get it… I'm not just doing it for fun. I have to right the wrongs my weapons did. My fathers weapons did. It's not my ego going crazy." He looked at her and she found an unbelievable amount of sadness hidden in his eyes, along with a desire for plain acceptance. "I like what I do and of course I like that people think I'm a hero, who wouldn't, Pepper? But I believe in what I'm doing with all of my heart. I know it is the right thing to do. So why is it wrong to enjoy the attention as well?" He searched her face for answers, but Pepper couldn't hold his gaze and turned her eyes away.

Tony wet to brush the topic off, but Pepper decided to place everything on one card.  
"When I first caught you in the suit, you had bullet holes up and down your body. You are always so snarky about everything, so I thought it was one of your antics. Especially since you had only just returned from…" Her voice faltered and cracked. "From Afghanistan. I thought you had PTSD and living more dangerous was your way of reacting." Before Tony could say anything to defend himself she spoke on. "But then you explained you wanted to right the wrongs Obie did and as you know I helped. I know you had noble intentions and I saw you were - maybe even for the first time in your life - trying to really do the right thing. So I stayed." She smiled at him, and Tony waited for her to continue. She took a deep breath, almost a sigh, "And then you announced you are Iron Man and it was so you, so typically Tony Stark." She laughed bitterly and looked to the side, fumbling with a bit of hay. "I thought I had lost Tony again. Just Tony, the good man, trying to do right. I thought your noble intentions were gone and you were back to your old self. Craving attention like a moth craves light."

"Is this really how you see me?" He asked and sounded so small, defeated.

She put the hay down and grabbed his hand, which was fiddling with a piece of hay as well. "I thought I did. But I was wrong." Their eyes met briefly, reassurance meeting doubt and fear. "You did the best you could. You tried to make the world a better, safer place. Yes you made mistakes and I'm not saying you didn't screw up big time, but you continued ridding the world of your weapons. Even after I left, you didn't stop."

Tony's eyes grew wide and he stared at her. "How do you know? After I promoted you, we barely spoke, because we both know I…"

"JARVIS." She stated as an explanation and smiled sadly. "I had him keep tabs on you for me. I wanted to know what's going on before the media beard it all through the news. Though your crazy antics with Vanko and Hammer didn't exactly help. You are doing the right thing. Anyone who says differently has no idea what they're talking about. Anyone who says differently doesn't know you. And though I admit I'd rather have you not fly around and endanger yourself, I understand why you have to do it. And I believe in you."

Tony looked at her and this time she didn't look away. Her ocean blue eyes were full of admiration and did he dare to say, devotion. Pepper Potts truly was his rock. She always accepted him and she'd do anything to help him. Hell, she had even stuck her hand inside his chest to switch his battery, and she had knowingly risked her life to help him take Obi down. And suddenly he felt so ashamed of himself for not telling her he had been dying. "God Pepper, I am so sorry." He said before he had any chance to stop himself.

"Hm?" She looked at him surprised.

"I'm sorry I hadn't told you. I just did-"

"Tony? Pepper?" Alex voice wavered into the barn from the outside.

"I guess they're back." Pepper observed. "I should get back to them. We're all invited over at Mimi's and Bo's for dinner tonight." And Tony was alone again.

* * *

**I still have a sneak peak for you: **

Alex was still sleeping next her, his face pressed to her side, holding her carefully, but tight. She looked at him and felt… nothing. Except sick. She couldn't handle being in his arms at the moment. Carefully she moved out of his embrace and practically fled the room, desperate for air.

**I hope I didn't disappoint you... :) **


	24. These are the lies

**Chapter 24: Lies**

**Hello everyone.  
I have been very ill this last week, so this might be a little wonky...**

**Thanks for all the kind and loving reviews.**

**This is the second to last chapter for Phase III! Remember there is a Phase IV waiting just around the corner.  
Though currently I haven't any chapters pre-written anymore, so I won't update until I have the next 2,5 Chapters down my ****pipeline. Otherwise it's very hard to foresee the plot and adapt to unplanned changes. I won't probably be back before mid February. Sorry my friends, but I also have other projects going on and I want to do good with this particular one, to make it worth your while!**

**So I will see you somewhere in Mid February! **

**Let's go, Pepperony Lovers: grab some tissues.**

**Song: These are the Lies by The Cap**

* * *

**These are the Lies**

* * *

_"__Lie: A _**_lie_**_ is an assertion that is believed to be false, typically used with the purpose of deceiving someone."_

* * *

Later that night they all went to dinner at Mimi's and Bo's. Bo had insisted the whole party should tag along, to Pepper's horror.

They had prepared a barbecue and set the table on the back porch of their small home. Pepper was sat between Alex and Tony on the round table and everyone was having pleasant smalltalk, though Tony and Emily weren't exactly talking to each other again.  
Tony hadn't returned to the farm house until it had been time to leave for Mimi's and Bo's. The pair had agreed quickly to not dwell on the topic for tonight, but that didn't mean everything was forgiven and forgotten. So the air was still thick between them and they were silently groveling.

Non the wiser, Bo had the beer cold and kept it coming for everyone and Tony very happily obliged.

After dinner Mimi brought out her famous peach cobbler and everyone devoured it. It was still warm outside and the sun was slowly setting behind the cornfields.

"Oh god" Pepper moaned, "this is so good. I can't believe I have gone so long without it."

"I'm glad you still like it, Gin." Mimi said and patted her shoulder.

"Mh Mimi," Tony choked out through a mouthful, before swallowing the bite he had in his mouth, "Pepper was right. I believe this is the best desert I have ever had. I need to have the receipt."

"You don't even cook, Tony." Pepper chuckled and bumped his shoulder with hers.

"I know, but I can have you cook it for me." He replied, grinned and stuffed his face with another fork full of cobbler. Pepper and Tony looked at each other for a moment and she gave him one of her typical Pepper-Looks, but with more warmth and a sparkle behind her eyes.

"Why can't Emily cook it for you?" Alex asked, sounding really interested. Peppers head snapped away from Tony's eyes a little too fast and she had to blink a couple of time to get back into the here and now.

"Because I can't cook." Emily replied and sounded ticked off.

"Hon, you're from New York. It comes with the package, that you can't cook. Don't worry about it." Tony replied, suddenly soothingly. It was something Pepper had always admired about him, he could grovel for hours when he was mad, but one minute to the other everything was fine again. He even took her hand, to which she in return beamed at him and gave him a chaste, but soft kiss. And for a moment Pepper felt her heart clench. But then Alex laughed and grabbed her hand and she felt save again.

"Ginny, would you help me with the dishes?" Mimi interrupted and collected the dishes and silverware.

"Sure." Pepper replied.

* * *

"Ginny, are you ok?" Mimi asked once they were alone in the kitchen and looked concerned at her.

"Yes, I'm good. Why do you ask?" She looked at the elderly woman and smiled, while putting away the plates into the dishwasher.

"You look strained, honey." Mimi said and took the casserole from Pepper's hands.

"I don't know what you mean…" Pepper said warily. "I haven't felt more relaxed in years than I have these past few days."

"I mean emotionally strained." Mimi suggested, hoping Pepper would finally get the drift. She didn't and just blinked at her dumfounded with furrowed eyebrows. "Do you really think it was good idea bringing him along?" She tried again.

"What?" She laughed nervously. "Why wouldn't I bring Alex? He's my boyfriend, he… he should get to know my past. My family… I mean, yes he's a little boring sometimes, and his life is not as exciting as Tony's. I mean he's no superhero, but he is just… lovely." Pepper tried deflecting, but felt her confidence waver pretty quickly, nervousness rising in her system.

"I know, he's just lovely, but I didn't mean-…" She didn't even get to finish her question before Pepper cut her off.

"I… I…" _Quick Pepper think. Of course you… like Alex very much. _"I adore him. He's picture perfect. We are very close and I enjoy his company. He's the type of guy every woman would dream about. He's secure and really mature. And you don't know him yet, he's the guy everyone would fall in love with. Why would you question our relationship?" She asked, not mad, but certainly unsure.

"Pepper, I actually didn't mean Alex. And what's even more interesting, I never said anything about your relationship. You assumed those things." Mimi left the moment hang between them and Pepper only stared at her wide eyed, like a child that got caught with her hand in the cookie jar. "Don't you want to tell me about it?"

"What?" Pepper asked, her voice wavering, shaking even.

"I saw how your face lit up when you and Tony joked and I saw how it fell when Tony took her hand and how your eye twitched when they kissed. And I saw how nothing changed when Alex grabbed your hand." The elder woman observed and cocked her head, waiting for Pepper to process her words. "I can see you're hiding something, Virginia. Don't you think you're lying to yourself here?"

"I'm not lying to myself. I want to be with Alex. I want to spent the rest of my life with him. He gives me security. I don't have to fear him suddenly disappearing on me one night or dying. I really want to be with him." Pepper looked at her with big blue eyes, begging her to understand, and Mimi did. Mimi truly understood her, probably even more than Pepper understood herself.

"You want to be with him? You are an item. Why aren't you?" She tried directing Pepper in the right direction.

"Wha- I am… We are…" Pepper was now totally confused. "We are together. I… I meant in the future."

"Are you sure about that?" The woman with gray stained hair looked at her hard and long, but soft and empathetic.

"Mimi, please." Pepper nearly begged now, her voice unnaturally high. "I really like Alex. He's perfect and he's everything and more I could have ever asked for. And I really wanted to bring him here. I don't want to lose that. And Tony and I… It was a long time coming and it didn't work out. And with him being here… He's happy with his girl, and I am happy for him, too. I truly am."

Laughter came from the door toward the kitchen and Emily called out for them, so the two women turned towards the noise.

Just before falling apart Pepper collected herself, setting herself into professional mode. "We should probably go back." When she caught Mimi's gaze she tried to smile reassuringly. "I'm happy. I promise. Tony is just a handful sometimes." And she hurried out the door, before Mimi could see her face drop once more.

"I hope you'll realize soon, he is more than just a handful for you." Mimi sighed and looked after the woman who was like a daughter to her.

* * *

Back at the table everybody was happily chatting and having a ball. Even Pepper looked like she was having a good time and definitely didn't look like Mimi had just nearly driven her into a full blown panic attack.

"So Tony," Mimi started as soon as she reached the table. Pepper didn't hear her at first, as she and Emily were in a heated discussion with Bo about the latest Cowboys game. "Pepper told me you might have some upgrades for our farming machines ins mind?"

"Yes." He exclaimed excitedly, in his mind already tinkering. "Bo mentioned one of the tractors is making problems. I'd be happy to help."

"What with?" Pepper interjected looking at them quizzically.

"Tony promised to help Bo with the tractor before we go back to California." Alex answered her question.

"I will show you right now what the problem is." Mimi offered and grabbed Tony's hand.

"Mimi." Pepper warned through her teeth. "It's such a nice evening. I'm sure Tony wants to stay and not take a look right now."

"I don't mind Pepper. We're here now and I can start working on a solution later that night or tomorrow morning." He was already standing, on hand on Emily's shoulder. "You good, Ems?"

"Sure, go! Bo and I still have to settle this argument." She grinned at Bo and he winked at her, clinking their bottles in friendship.

"Fine." Pepper huffed but continued to glare at Mimi. She knew exactly what her mothers friend had in mind.

* * *

After s'mores and a few rounds charades at Mimi's an Bo's they all returned to the farm. Tired from today's events Tony and Emily, who had made up called it a night and went to bed directly.

Pepper decided to to go check on the horses once more before turning in with Alex herself. After her talk with Mimi a few hours ago, she felt like she needed a few moments to herself to clear her head and get herself bag on track.

Was Mimi right? Was she only pretending with Alex to protect herself? Funny how a few very well placed questions could have wavered her confidence in her relationship so quickly.

After Pepper shut Pearls door she turned to head back to the house when she saw Alex leaning on the gate of the barn watching her.

"Hi," She said softly as she reached him, laying her head against his chest and slipping her arms around him. "I didn't see you coming."

"Are you ok, B?" He asked softly. "You seemed distressed at dinner."

Crap he had noticed her being in her head, trying to figure out what Mimi had meant. "Just tired." She said and took his hand. "We should turn in, too. Today was very exhausting."

* * *

An hour later she lay in bed spent, but not able to fall asleep. Alex was already sound asleep next to her, his breathing evenly and deep, with one arm flung around her naked middle.

Finally she started drifting off herself. But her sleep was restless and she dreamt of chocolate brown eyes and black, silky hair. His smirk haunted her dreams as well. Yet every time she looked into those brown orbs she saw hazel, female eyes staring back at her and a girl with brown hair appeared taking his hand, leading him away from her. When she called after him, he would turn around and tell her, this was what she wanted.

Pepper woke again with a start, panting slightly.

This had to stop. She didn't know why she was still dreaming about him. She was in love with Alex. And she wasn't in love with Tony. She didn't need or want Tony in her life. At least not like this. They hadn't worked out. Simple as that. And now they both had moved on, had wonderful relationships, that fulfilled everything they both could had ever asked for. Them being friends was the right and logical thing. It was the perfect solution.

This man lying next to her really was everything she could have ever asked for. He was kind and caring, compassionate and basically worshipped her. He loved her to pieces and she had chosen him over Tony. It had been the right thing to do, hadn't it? She and Tony were better off with just being friends, weren't they? They really were invincible that way. The past nine month had proven that. And Alex indeed made her happy. She wanted him and she wanted Tony as a friend.  
Her dreams meant nothing, it was just her subconsciousness mocking her, because they had spent basically 24/7 the last few days together. And Emily, she really got along great with her.  
So why did she feel like screaming every time they kissed or touched each other in front of her? And why did she feel like she couldn't breath every single night they went to bed together. And she had her own fairytale lying right next to her. Her very own Prince Charming.  
Yet, every time she looked to her right, where Alex was laying wrapped around her she caught herself feeling a little disappointed that his hair was blond, instead of black. She looked over at him and studied his features carefully.

Alex was still sleeping next her, his naked body carefully wrapped around her and his face pressed to her side, holding her carefully, but tight. She looked at him and felt… nothing.  
Except sick. She couldn't handle being in his arms at the moment. Carefully she moved out of his embrace.

Her breathing accelerated and a sheer layer of sweat started tickling her forehead. Her lungs felt like they were running out of air, while the walls seemed to be closing in on her.  
This was wrong. Mimi could read her so easily. And him, he deserved so much more than her. But she couldn't let him win so easily and she couldn't lose him in a short noted decision. She couldn't take this anymore. She… she had to get out. Get air, get a clear mind, rest and re-focus.

* * *

What Pepper didn't know yet, approximately 10 feet away Tony lay in bed staring at the ceiling as well.

He couldn't get the conversation he shared with Mimi out of his head.

_"__So you and Pepper?" The elder woman asked as they strolled toward the small shed near the driveway. _

_"__What?" He asked surprised._

_"__She told me you two had tried to be in a relationship and it didn't work out." Mimi said nonchalantly. _

_"__Yeah, that's not exactly true." Tony countered, not really keen on talking tp a strange woman about his twisted relationship with Pepper. "She was too chickened… I mean… We only kissed and decided against… pursuing it any further." Her tried to put it diplomatically._

_"__You mean she blocked you, before you got a chance to break her heart." The woman smirked at him. God she was good with people._

_"__Maybe. But I do have a stable relationship now. And she is with Alex." He offered. _

_"__I can see that, but forgive me, neither of you look really happy." She stated and moved ahead into the shed. "Here it is. It sounds like the battery is empty, but we switched it already with no luck. You think you can fix it, Stark?"_

_Tony tried turning it on, but it wouldn't budge. A few looks and tries later, he found the problem and his mind was already working on a solution. Yet her previous comment didn't leave his mind. _

_"__I can fix it before we leave. I'll order the parts tomorrow first thing and we have it running again in no time."_

_"__Great, thanks Tony." _

_"__Mimi, what did you mean with none of us looks really happy?" Tony asked before she got a chance to leave the shed. _

_"__I meant exactly what I said." She just persisted. _

_"__Look, I don't know what Pepper has told you, but I am very happy with Emily. She is my girl and now my life, and not to be rude, but I don't get why everybody is doubting that. We are very happy. Yes we fought today, but which couple dosen't, am I right? and sure Emily is complicated sometimes and very very naive, but that's her…" He said and stuck his hands in his pockets, picking up his shoulders. _

_"__Funny, you and Pepper basically told me the same. Why do feel like you have to defend your relationship? I was talking about you." She laughed and he opened the door for him._

_Tony was now totally confused and trotted behind her. _

_"__I am sorry, I think I don't get it…" _

_"__Don't break her heart, Stark." And Mimi was gone towards the house, leaving Tony to ponder her answer in the dark._

And there he lay, still in the dark, still pondering her answer.  
Emily snuggled deeper into his chest and sighed contently in her sleep. He had never expected to be so happy in a committed relationship, it actually surprised himself. Emily was exactly what he had been looking for in woman. Clever, witty, good in bed, easy to be around. She even could admit when she was wrong and she apologized today for their fight. Something Pepper would probably never do. God she was so strong headed and stubborn sometimes.

So it was good he had moved on. His life was easier, more peaceful, more… boring.

Yes Emily was clever, but not nearly as intelligent and quick as Pepper. Emily lived to please him, almost like a dog, whereas Pepper was his personally daily challenge, keeping him on his toes. It was easy being with her, but it was almost too easy. Too smooth. Emily wasn't a fight, she wasn't a challenge. Which was good, a welcoming change in his everyday life, that was already very much complicated with Iron Man.

Who was he kidding. Yes, Emily was nice and pleasant to be around. But it was boring. She was clever, but no where near intelligent and quick as Pepper was. She didn't give him a run for his money, like Pepper would, but she also didn't excite him, like Pepper could. If he'd compare them both to each other, Emily was an old sepia picture, while Pepper was full blown technicolor.

Then he heard the door across the hallway open and he tiptoed over and saw Pepper, only dressed in her grey Columbia t-shirt and panties hurry out her room.

And he knew. The lies had to stop tonight.

* * *

Pepper nearly ran down the stairs and threw the back door open. In no time she was out the door, down the porch and her bare feet came in contact with the grass. The night air was mild and it smelled of grass and hay and summer. Her lungs filled themselves with summer air, while her eyes slowly opened to see the black night sky scattered with star through the patchy curtain of leaves above her.

Each breath made the fog in her mind whirr and seemingly disappear more and more.

"I love Alex. I love Alex. I love Alex." She repeated those three words like a mantra to herself, hoping, no knowing, the more she repeated them it would become the truth.

"Pepper?" Suddenly Tony's voice cut through the night behind her. She turned and saw him standing on the steps of the porch, hair messy, only clad in a pair of basketball shorts, his chest bare. His voice was as soft and unsure, as it was clear and demanding.  
Her chest begun heaving and and the fog seemed to return.  
No she loved Alex. She wanted to be with him, it was easy with him. This was what was keeping her alive and sane.  
"Pep." His voice was now next to her, his hand grabbing hers.  
And then something in her snapped.

**_A lie is an assertion that is believed to be false, typically used with the purpose of deceiving someone._**

Pepper Potts had three lies she continued telling herself to keep herself alive:

1st: She was happy for Tony and Emily.

2nd: She was in love and happy with Alex.

3rd: She was not in love with Tony Stark

And those lies worked. They did. Except now the didn't anymore. She couldn't continue lying to herself. It was time for the truth. Her truth.

"Pepper?" She heard him behind her, his hand tugging on hers. Her breathing accelerated, she was almost panting now.  
_No. You have a boyfriend who's sleeping not even 10 feet away._

"Don't -"

"Why not?" She couldn't. She would never be able to. "Pepper."

The truth was, she was about to lose it. She couldn't continue this way. Without him.

And suddenly her lips were on his and her hands buried themselves in his hair.  
Tony rocked back when she flung herself at him, and his back made contact with the wall. He was a bit shell shocked, not realizing what was happening at first. His brain was a little too slow for him to catch up, because he couldn't believe it was actually happening. And before he could respond in anyway she had stopped kissing him. When she started backing off he saw fear, hurt and rejection in her eyes, and tears.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have done that. I… I… should have never-"

Tony grabbed her arm and pulled her back to him again. "Pepper, shut up." He said and took her face in his hands. Before he captured her lips he smiled at her, unbelievable happy.

While her first kiss had been pent up tension and fear and sadness, their second kiss was far more gentle. Pepper wasn't panting anymore, her breathing had leveled down and the fog from her mind had completely cleared.

Tony's lips moved carefully along hers and she could feel him smile into the kiss. She marveled how his lips felt against her owns and wondered how she could have denied him after their first kiss month ago. His tongue traced her lover lip carefully and begged for entrance, to which she whole heartedly complied. Her hands slid from his chest, where they had been pressed between them up to his hair, burring themselves into his rich curls again, pulling him even tighter and deeper into their kiss.

Tony had one of his hand still at the nape of her neck, partly tilting her chin up to him, partly cradling her fiery red locks and stroking the point behind her ear carefully, gently with his thumb. His other arm was flung around the small of her back, hoisting her up on her tiptoes and pressing her to him. He was afraid it he ever let her go, she might vanish again, maybe even for good.

When air became necessary he pressed his forehead down against hers and closed his eyes, though he couldn't stop himself from pecking her every other second and she giggled and welcomed him each time.

After his tenth peck or so Pepper caught his lower lip with her teeth carefully and commanded him back to her, directly opening her mouth to his. Tony, now feeling more confident than ever, used his hands to hoist Pepper up and put her legs around his waist, carrying her towards one of the beams next to the stairs and pushing her softly against it. Happy to be even closer to Tony and finally kissing him, she tightened her legs around him, totally forgetting where they were.

"Pepper?" Alex voice came from the living room and she gasped, quickly untangling herself from Tony and grabbing his hand to run around the corner, out of sight.

"That was a close one." Tony laughed, panting next to her, his back leaned against the wall. It wasn't until then, that he noticed Pepper was sitting on the ground, knees to her chest, face in hand. "Pepper?" He asked, suddenly unsure of himself and fearing the worst at the same time.

"What have I done?" She mumbled into her hands over and over again.

"You've done nothing, Pepper." He tried and failed to sound reassuring. He knew very well what they had just done. What they had done the whole time. Cheating. And he hated to admit… it felt like crap.

"Nothing?!" Her voice was high pitched and panicked. "I just cheated on my boyfriend, Tony." Her head fell back against the house wall and a tear ran down her cheek.

"If it is any consolation, I just cheated as well." He offered.

"That's not helping." She sniffed and looked anywhere, but at him.

"Look I know you don't see yourself as that kind of person, but it happens. People cheat, Pepper. We aren't the first, and we won't be the last to do it. It's not nice and it is certainly not fair, but it is the way it is." He tried reasoning, but she wouldn't look at him. "Pepper, you are still one of the most caring and loving people I know. You will always be an epitome of class. You deserve to be loved. This doesn't make you any less lovable or trustworthy." Still no reaction. "Look, I know cheating sucks -" She interrupted his speech, but still made no eye contact.

"Tony, I hate the fact that I just cheated. But the cheating isn't the problem…" She finally looked at him, big blue eyes full of tears, some of them spreading down her cheeks, and yet there was something else. Guilt. And happiness.

"The problem is you liked it." Tony finished for her, happiness spreading through him.

* * *

**Sneak**

"I'll leave it alone until New York. After that I'll have my answer."

**See yall in ****February. **

**Leave a little love (:**


	25. Show Yourself

**Chapter 25 **

**Hey y'all! **

**Ok it's super late here, but I wanted to get this done before I go visit my parents tomorrow. Also I am half asleep by now, after working 13 hours without a real break, so don't mind any mistakes. **

**Thank you so so much for all your comments, dedication and ideas! You guys are the best! **

**That's why the next few lines are breaking my heart. **

**Let me start by saying: Yes this is going to be a Pepperony chapter. But I can't fulfill some your wishes from the comments. If you don't want to read on, because I disappointed you, that's ok and I get it. But like all of you said in December, this is my story and I want to be happy with what I am writing, too. So please give me a chance to explain. **

**First: There will be no secret child or any child or what so ever. I won't ever write Tony and Pepper as parents. It's like one of my cardinal rules.  
****Don't get me wrong, I loved Morgan in Endgame to pieces and I love Lexi Rabe to pieces. But until Endgame I was always like: Tony and Pepper can't have a child. Ok, Endgame proofed me wrong obviously.  
Yet, to me, and I know this is a very unpopular und controversial opinion, I just don't see them as parents. In my tiny Pepperony bubble in my head I just can't stand the thought of them having kids. I'm sorry if I upset you, but I just don't see it. Maybe it is because I put a lot of myself into my characterization and I can't see myself having kids either. So I am sorry to disappoint, but no kids here. **

**Second, and this is hurting me even more, because so many of you requested it:  
I don't want to spoil anything, but I don't want to give false hope either. There will be no sex in the hayloft. In fact in this chapter there's no sex at all. I feel like my character haven't reached this point yet.  
****I know, we are all yearning for Pepperony and - like some of you put it - the good, hot stuff. Believe me it is coming, actually the chapter is already written and sitting on my computer, so it's not too far away.  
But after 23 chapters of them only having fear to geting hurt and trying to do the right thing and thus hurting each other, I can't and I won't go on like: and now all morals go out the window and screw everything, lets just fuck like bunnies.  
I took time destroying our favorite couple, so I want to at least take a little more time to make the good stuff really good and most importantly more meaningful than just a pity fuck out of pent up emotions in a hayloft.  
I don't see my characters like this here, and I am so so SO sorry to not grant your wish here. But no.  
That doesn't mean sex in the hayloft would't be an awesome Epilogue/Bonus Chapter! Thanks for the idea guys. **

**Like I said, I understand if you don't want to continue reading from now on, because I didn't use your ideas here. I totally get it. But I will not publish something, I'm not even remotely happy with. And your idea, which is great on it's own and I totally get where you're coming from, if I were you I'd probably want the same, just doesn't feel right. So I am sorry but I just can't, though it's breaking my heart, cause your support ist overwhelming! **

**I think I've said enough now. Happy reading. I hope you still enjoy it a little bit.**

**Song: Show Yourself by Idina Menzel Frozen 2**

* * *

**Show Yourself **

"The problem is you liked it." Tony finished for her, happiness spreading through him.

Pepper didn't answer him, she just looked at him, guilt evident in her eyes. To be honest, she didn't know how to feel.

Yes, she felt horrible for cheating on Alex. It was a situation she had never believed to find herself in. She had a very fine moral compass and she had always loathed people who cheated, hated them even. And now she wasn't any better than those people. Had she not told Tony off month ago in fear of him cheating on her, and now she wasn't any better herself? She really felt like a hypocrite.

In her head a battle was raging, because what was even worse, the longer she stared at those big, brown chocolate eyes the bigger got the burning desire inside of her to grab his face and kiss him again.

Ever fibre of her being felt like it was on fire, electrocuted. A warmth had settled in the pit of her stomach and if she had thought she had had butterflies in her stomach before, it was nothing compared to the swarm of -apparently- bees which took hostage in her belly. The way he was looking at her now, made her melt, funnel before his feet like a puddle of melted chocolate. Never ever had someone looked at her with so much love and devotion in his eyes like he did now, and the certainty and sureness in his features scared her senseless.

He had been right. Had known it from the beginning. Had seen right through her walls of fear, self-consciousness and distrust in him and herself, and had known what she had truly desired the whole time. She really felt like the biggest coward of all time.

And yet, she wanted to do it again. The moment he had kissed her felt like the first ray of sunlight after a cloudy storm. It was like her lungs had gotten oxygen for the first time after a 10 minute dive and like her head had finally stopped spinning after turning and turning on a Mary go round for hours. Every nerve ending was hypersensitive and numb at the same time. Everything was him. There was no concept of time anymore. No past, no future. Just this. Just him. Just them.

And she hated herself for feeling like this.

This wasn't suppose to happen. Nothing of this mess. They weren't suppose to be here, hiding behind a corner of the house in the middle of the night after a mind blowing kiss. They weren't supposed to be here at all.  
He wasn't supposed to be in Texas at all. And she wasn't suppose to give in to his charms at all. Not when she had a boyfriend running around the property, looking for her. And most importantly she wasn't supposed to fall for him even harder than she had before.  
But she did.  
"Pep?" She heard him talking to her. Without noticing her glance had shifted away from him, lost in her own thoughts. He was now crouched in front of her, his warm hands on her knees. She only then realized how cold she actually was.

"Come on, Pepper. Let's get you up from the ground. The grass is damp and you're getting cold. I don't want you to get ill."

She grabbed his outstretched hands, without saying a word and let hm pull her up to her feet, before taking her hands back and wrapping her arms around her torso to protect herself from the cold. They stood now next no each other, looking into the darkness of the backyard. There were a thousand things she wanted to say, and a thousand things she couldn't put in words. She had never felt so lost, yet she still could feel the heat radiating off his body next to her and it made her feel more alive than she had ever felt.

She wasn't sure what she was going to say as soon as she'd open her mouth. She'd either scream and be a coward again, run and never return or she was gonna come clear this exact moment and break apart in front of him, telling him what fools they made out of themselves and two innocent, wonderful people those last month.  
Pepper found she did't know what she would say, and what feared her even more, she wasn't sure what she liked better, admitting she was a horrible human or continuing lying to him and herself. So she kept her mouth shut.  
And it was enough.

In this moment nothing made sense, but everything had a significance to it. The way they were standing next to each other, without even touching, yet having a connection on a so much deeper lever, than physically possible.  
The way no things needed to be said and the way he knew she needed space at the moment, yet not straying too far away from her, knowing she would crumble to pieces with doubt in herself and her actions. They way he was just there, without intruding. The way he was able to read her like a book and the way she was able to make the ever confident Tony Stark waver and run after her.

After a while Tony finally spoke again. "Do you wanna take a walk?"

Pepper didn't know what to answer, didn't know what she wanted. And maybe her silence spoke louder than a thousand words.

"May I suggest something?" Tony asked carefully. He didn't want to send her off running, not when he had a silver lining on his horizon now. But he knew Pepper, a war was raging in her head, and hopefully in her heart as well. And he had a shot at winning.  
He looked at her carefully, studying her features. Her face was calm, blank even. And he knew it could only mean one thing. Pepper ofter wore her emotions on her sleeve. Well, not exactly visible for everyone, but he could normally see them.

When she was furious, she looked calm and collected, preparing in her mind to run you over like a bulldozer in the most professional and intelligent manner.  
When she was happy her eyes glistened and when she was sad she looked determined and tried to smile, being compassionate and more sweet, as if she could change the worlds fate by making the life of others even the tiniest bit better.

But blank, he rarely saw. Once only to be exact, when she found out her fiancé had been cheating on her.  
It meant she was losing a battle against herself. It meant she was about to become something she had never seen herself become.  
So he continued.

"How about, we go get dressed a bit more. And if you want to talk or just don't want to think alone, we meet at the back door in 15 minutes. I'll be there. If you don't come that's fine. I won't hold it against you, Pepper. And I promise to never bring this night up again. I, however think we should at least talk about that. And I think I still owe you an apology and an explanation. So I hope to see you in 15 minutes." Without waiting for her answer he pressed a kiss into her hair and was on his way back in to the house, not daring to look back.

Pepper felt tears prickling in her eyes, she felt so lost. When goosebumps started rising up her naked legs again, she too turned and went inside. But she honestly didn't trust herself to return.

* * *

Approximately twelve minutes later Tony was standing outside, hoping, no praying Pepper would come. He didn't dare to turn and look at the door so he kept staring out into the dim light of the night, feeling the cool night air breezing around his bare shins.

It wasn't until then, that he felt he was slightly trembling. Funny, because in his thick blue Stark Industries hoodie and his basketball shorts, along with sneakers he actually was pretty warm. He found he was trembling, but not because of the cold, rather because he was nervous and excited. Nervous, because of whether Pepper would come or not.

If not… He wasn't sure what he would do. He had fought tooth and nail for this woman, for the slightest glimpse of a chance, and eventually she had caved. He had never been happier in his entire life, than in the moment twenty minutes ago when she had pressed her lips against his, and had finally surrendered to what he had known she had been too frightened to accept.  
She had kissed him first, not the other way round and that alone gave him hope beyond reason. And she had liked it. She had told him so herself.  
If she'd come he really had a chance to make this temporary, to show her they'd be amazing together, instead of separated. He could make her his, and his only.

Pepper really was his best friend. The day they had first kissed he felt whole for the first time again, since his parents died. But she had been afraid he'd break her heart, and to be honest, with his past, he couldn't blame her. For years it had been her duty to escort his conquests out of his home after he had used one after another like a paper wipe. He knew he was a changed man since Afghanistan, but he couldn't blame other people, and certainly not Pepper - who had seen his worst - for doubting his change. And to diminish his alleged change he had been dying and maybe hadn't reacted in the most mature way to it. Ok, he had been an asshole, especially to Pepper. He as well had been afraid. Afraid to tell her he was dying, afraid to tell her he loved her, afraid of his own feelings. Who was he to blame her for being afraid of her own feelings.

But she had finally snapped, acted on her feelings and it was the best feeling in the world to him. He could still feel her lips on his, taste the faint traces of her toothpaste on his tongue and the breeze that played with the leaves on the ground around his calves still held a whiff of her scent. It was like she was there with him again, just standing next to him. Not quite touching, but close enough to feel her body heat. Tony realized he missed her already. His body, but more is heart yearned for her, ached for her to return and give him the chance they both deserved.

Then, before he heard her soft steps on the wooden patio, before her soft "Tony? - unsure, sad, asking, and yet so steady and warm - reached his ears, even before her scent reached his nose again, he knew she was there. It had always been this way with her around. It was like Pepper was a magnet and Tony was the iron, always drawn to her, always aligning in her direction.

Pepper carefully lay a hand on Tony's shoulder when she reached him and felt him inhale deeply. His shoulder warmed her hand through his sweater and the muscles under her hand tighten for a second, before he turned. She let her hand fall to her side, but Tony caught it before it reached its mark, holding it in his own, while his brown eyes searched her blue ones in the dim light. He was looking for any clue what she was thinking, his own eyes conveying a mix of hope and happiness, but also fear and some sort of sadness and guilt. Yet, when he found no doubt, but was rather greeted with uncertainty and a softness beyond compare, the emotions behind his eyes changed to pure affection.  
He smiled and Pepper felt the corners of her mouth twitch, as well in return. Before she knew what was happening Tony had lowered his forehead to hers, now both of her hands closed in both of his between them. Her eyes had involuntarily closed, as soon as his forehead had touched hers and she inhaled his scent, filling her lungs and her head with it. He smelled like him, rich cologne, soap and faint trace of gasoline and metal. It almost felt like home. But there was something lingering underneath. Something flowery, feminine. It was wrong. So wrong. The other smell bothered her to no end, and she knew exactly what she was smelling. It was his girlfriend. She could still smell his girlfriend on him, on his clothes. And what was even worse, it didn't only repel her because she knew they were basically cheating right now, no it bothered her, because she wanted that scent gone from him, for ever. This scent didn't belong on him. It had no right to kling to him. Everything in her screamed at her to get rid off it forever. He should not smell like another girl, he should smell like him, and only him. Ok maybe like herself, too.

"You came." Tony breathed out into the tiny space between them.

"I -" But he didn't let her finish. His hands had left hers and were back left and right on her cheeks, holding her face carefully while he was kissing her. It was soft and loving. She felt his tongue gently trace her lower lip and as badly as she wanted to give in and just kiss him, she just couldn't… shouldn't…  
Her body unfortunately betrayed her, and Pepper had the slight suspicion for once her heart managed to shut her head out and take control over her actions. Her mouth opened to him, kissing him back with an enthusiasm that even surprised herself. She could feel him smile into the kiss and let herself fall for the second time this night. Her own hands settled on his waist, gripping his hoodie while she tried to get closer to him. Tony's hands slowly transitioned from her cheeks, one to the back of her head, tangling itself in her hair, pulling and angling her head to kiss her even deeper, the other one made its way to her waist, pulling her body tighter to his.  
And for the third time that night, her body betrayed her when a moan escaped into his mouth.

They continued kissing for quite some time until air became an absolute necessity and Pepper pulled back, panting slightly. She actually managed to regain some control over her body and brought a few inches of space between them, yet she was smiling awkwardly at him and her voice was somewhat hoarse and unsteady when she spoke.  
"I think we need to talk, Stark."

"As much as I hate to admit it, but I think you're right." Tony sighed.

"I think we ne a little… space from… the house." Pepper said, still trying to regain her breath. She had just let herself be kissed by Tony, again. Both of their partners only a few feet away, unaware and peacefully sleeping.

"Let's go to the treehouse. It's only a few hours until sunrise…" She didn't say anything, she just looked at him, pondering his words. "I bet it is spectacular." He finished sheepishly.

"Ok." She answered. "But I don't have the key with me. It's upstairs…" She trailed off, not yet willing to touch the elephant in the room. "Do you have a phone?" She said while inhaling. Tony duck ihn hands into his pocket and took his phone out, showing it to her.  
"We need a flashlight." Pepper explained.

After Tony switched the light on Pepper moved to walk past him, further into the backyard, but Tony caught her arm and spun her back to him, kissing her again hard, pouring all of his own uncertainty and fear into the kiss and trying to show her that he was maybe just as lost as she was.  
"Pepper," he whispered her name like a prayer, desperation lingering in his voice, "please promise me one thing. No matter what happens, no matter what I say or what we… do, promise me you won't run away tonight."

Pepper sighed, the realty and gravity of theirs situation suddenly crashing back down on her. "Tony, I -"

"Promise me." He asked. "Give me until dawn. I just want your time until sunrise. No interruptions, no distractions. I even promise to not touch you anymore, unless you want me to. I just need a chance to explain and express a few things." His eyes were pleading with her in the darkness and it made her melt inside and filled her with fear at the same time. After a moment she nodded in response and Tony let go of her arm.

They walked trough the trees towards the hill in silence. The sky was still clear and the stars looked down on them. In the distance a few crickets were chirping and occasionally some small animal rumbled through the bushes. Pepper made them stop at the barn briefly to get two outdoor pillows and a blanket. They would be sitting on the wooden porch, which could become very uncomfortable over time.

Once they were comfortably seated next to each other, backs leaned against the wall of the tree house, Tony had his legs propped up against the railing of the porch, while Pepper had her knees drawn up to her chest again. Her grey hoodie stood out against the dark blue blanket she had thrown over her yoga pants clad legs and her hair was still vibrant against the grey in the darkness. They just sat there for a few minutes, neither saying anything, not knowing how to start the conversation both knew would either make or break them.  
At one point Tony thought Pepper might have fallen asleep, but when he looked over at her, she was looking at the sky in front of them, gazing at the stars, studying their constellations.

"A year ago I would have given anything to be able to get this view for only one more night." Tony said while looking at her.

Pepper's gaze shifted from the stars to his face. "The stars?" She asked clueless.

"No." He smiled softly and felt sheepish again. "Yes, the stars, the sun, a sunrise." He corrected. "You, with tousled hair, in a hoodie, sleep-drunk next to me in the wee hours of the morning." He continued and scratched the back of his head with his hand, ruffling his hair.

Tony noticed how Pepper clutched the blanket with unsteady hands, but when she spoke her voice was soft. "So long?" She simply asked, but Tony knew she was asking when he knew he fell for her.

"No." He stated and chuckled lowly. "I've been in love with you for years." He confessed, rather matter of factly. "I first recognized it two years ago. In a dirty bed in an even dirtier cave in Afghanistan, when I heard your voice in my head, while they…" He couldn't continue. He knew they had to touch on the unpleasant matters eventually, but not in the same moment he basically confessed his love for her. "And in my dreams at night, you'd come and comfort me."

"Why did you never act updon it back then?" Pepper asked, not responding to his hesitation. "Why did you wait another year?"

"I said I recognized it back then. I came to terms with it about nine month later. And in my honor, I asked you before my "I am Iron Man" press conference whether you wanted to be my girlfriend." He had to laugh himself at his statement.

"Oh please, even you couldn't take that proposal serious." In this statement the Pepper he knew was back for a glimpse of time.

"Well, you did hurt me back then." He responded.

"Don't you think, we have fought enough about this day already?" She dared and crinkled her nose at him.

"Maybe." Tony agreed and laughed, his head falling back against the wall, eyes to the sky again. Silence settled over them once more, it wasn't unpleasant, but it wasn't light either.

"When you were in that cave," Pepper started after a while, "I hate the thought, that the last person who had slept in your bed was that blonde bimbo from Vanity Fair. The the last woman who had touched you was her and not me. That day I didn't go with you to the airport like I normally did, because it was my birthday and I wanted to make you jealous, so I said I had plans." She was quiet for a minute or two. Before she continued she sighed as to strain herself. "I never regretted anything more in my life than that. I don't know if you know, if Happy or Rhodey told you, but I was a wreck the entire time you were gone."

"Yeah, I know. Happy told me after the stunt I pulled, with being missing again. I overrode your protocol and had JARVIS show me the videos. Well, I tried to watch them, I couldn't. Not after I saw you break down in my hallway. Gosh, I was such an asshole." He confessed and ran a hand trough his hair again, a nervous habit, like Pepper knew.

"I can't argue with that." Pepper smiled at him sadly and looked away again. "But I think we might share that trait." Now it was her stroking a strand of strawberry blonde hair behind her ear with a trembling hand.

"Why, Pepper?" He asked after a minute or two. "Why did you shoot me down again and again?" The was no remorse or bitterness in his voice, just a sense of curiosity and uncertainty.

She inhaled a few times before answering. "I was afraid." There was the silence again, and Tony yearned to reach out and touch her hand again, but his promise kept him from doing so. "I was afraid of my feelings. It is unprofessional to fall in love with your boss. And I was afraid of you. You are… a lot sometimes." They both chuckled, before she continued. "I noticed the change after Afghanistan. Hell, how couldn't I? I didn't have to drive through the whole town to get the dry-cleaning for one of your conquests anymore." Her chuckle was dry and unpleasant, but her voice was gentle when she continued. "You were more responsible. More focused and serious. And after… Obi, you took responsibility and stepped up as CEO. It took some time readjusting to the new you and I wasn't sure I could trust the new you yet, that's why I turned you down at the conference." She explained and Tony got it. Before he could elaborate his question, Pepper answered it, without knowing. "After that, however I began looking at you more closely. I wanted to know whether you were serious or not. Whether your feelings were maybe the same as mine. Looks like we're both good at hiding, don't you think?" She asked sadly.

"You have no idea, how close I came to telling you that one time in your office before you left for Washington." Tony said, chuckling bitterly to himself.

"You did?" Pepper sounded surprised.

This time both his hands ran through his hair, he was frustrated with himself. Why was this so hard?  
This time a petite, steady hand took hold of his mid-stroke and brought it down into her lap. When he looked over at her he saw her blue orbs staring into his soul expectantly.

She wasn't trembling anymore. She knew he had started a story he wanted to finish so desperately, but didn't know how. He wanted to protect her, to not send her off running again, but he was bursting at the seems with what he was keeping in.

What he didn't know, Pepper was done running. She was done with letting things hang in the air between them, where they would rot and someday explode. She wanted to know everything, wanted to finally learn who he really was, she was dying to meet him. The real him, no more reservation, no more hiding.  
"Tell me." She whispered.

"I almost died." He stated, simple as that. "I almost died and all I wanted to do was tell you was how much I love you and how much more you deserved, but I somehow couldn't. I'm as big as a coward as you are."

Pepper was silent, she had known since his tamponade, but this was now his story to tell and she didn't wanted to interrupt him, not when he was opening up to her for the first time. So she stayed silent and encouraged him to keep talking. He shouldn't feel like he needed to hide himself from her and she knew, sometimes the most she could do was just be there for him and listen.

"The reactor was poisoning me…" He rasped out, not able to meet her eyes. He felt too embarrassed, too wounded. "Palladium leaked trough the core into my blood system. I went through cores for the reactor rapidly, each time each one was more scattered and porous than before, leaking more palladium into my system." He took his hand back from her grip, twisting is fingers in his lap, looking at them instead of her.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked, her voice steady but soft.

"I was too scared of your rejection. And I didn't want to hurt you. I never wanted to. And when I realized how much I had already hurt you with not telling you, it was too late. Our relationship was too damaged. You wouldn't listen to me anymore and I couldn't blame you. I still can't blame you." He finished quietly.

"You should have made me listen. I should have listened." Her hands trembling again as she kneaded them together. "I should have noticed, Tony. I am so so sorry I didn't see you were screaming at me for help. I wasn't there for you when you needed me most." It all returned when she spoke, the dread of figuring out he had been dying while he was laying in a hospital bed month ago. _I can pick my successor. My successor is you. It's always been you. _He had known he was dying. He had been dying and he had known it. He had been dying. And she hadn't realized it. She felt like she had let him down, like she had thrown away their trust and knowledge of each other, they had built over the years. "I'm sorry…"

"No, Pep, stop apologizing." He finally turned to her, she was staring at the sky, swallowing, her mouth slightly open and her breath even. Tears were glistening in her eyes while she drew in another shaky breath. "It was me. I didn't say anything, I constantly pushed you away, it was me behaving like a giant asshole. You had every right to doubt me, to turn on me, to question me. I am sorry."

"So it was all real?" She asked after a while, still not looking at him.

"What?" Tony asked softly.

"The things you said at your party?" She concluded quietly, almost ashamed. "That you love me." The last was whispered.

"I think I already pretty much told you so earlier." He said, his voice light hearted and a little taunting.

"I know, but I still have a hard time believing it." She confessed awkwardly. Pepper felt heat rising in her cheeks and a small smile played her lips, at the mere thought of Tony Stark actually wanting her. Loving her.

"Why?" He asked softly.

"It just seems so surreal. Here we are on a vacation. You with your girlfriend, me with with-"

He interrupted her before she could finish her sentence. "Pepper, no matter where we will go from here, I think we both know: Emily has to go. I can't and won't speak for yourself, but Emily won't be an issue anymore. Either way I'm gonna break up with her."

"Are you sure about this?" Pepper asked, feeling uncertain and guilty again. They had just cheated, Tony was about to leave his girlfriend, presumably for her. And she? Would she leave Alex? Could she finally surrender herself and be with Tony. She wasn't sure whether she was strong enough or not.

"I am. Emily has to go. She is nice and deserves more than this. I could never give her what she truly wants and the other way round." He said and looked at her hard and stern.

Pepper considered his word for a moment, not sure what she should say and not able to look at him either. She wanted to be with him and he was right. Alex deserved a woman who loved him and only him unconditionally. Pepper didn't. And he deserved more than her cheating on him. So if she wanted to be with Tony, really be with him, she had to break things off with Alex first. That thought left her somewhat nauseous. The only thing worse, than getting you heart broken, was breaking a heart yourself. "Tony, I -"

But he cut her off again. "Don't say anything. Like I said I won't speak for yourself, Pepper." The first glimpses of dawn painted the sky a light teal-greenish color. "It's dawn." He observed with a sigh and smiled at her when she looked at him and then back to the sky. "My time's up."

They kept looking at the fading stars and the shades of blue for a long time, without saying a word. Her with her knees drawn to her chest again, her hand folded on her shins, him with his legs crossed and his hands folded on his lap.

"You deserve the world, Pepper." He whispered suddenly into the sound of the birds chirping in the morning light. "You deserve to be as happy as you could possibly be. Even if it's not with me. But I want you to take your time and think about it. I'll leave it alone until the conference with the UN in New York in two weeks. After that I'll have my answer."

He was up and down the ladder before his words had sunken in. Was he setting her free? Within a heart beat she was up and after him.  
"Tony," she called and he turned. Her eyes were watery again and the doubt and confusion had returned, but she looked certain as well. "You said I should give you til sunrise." She glanced at her watch, that was still on her arm. "You owe me two more minutes."

* * *

**Well this was super long! I hope you still liked it, though it wasn't what you asked for. I hope I will see you all next chapter. **

**I will have the next chapter posted by no later than March 8th.**

Sneak: Tony had made his way back towards the house and he didn't look exactly thrilled at what he saw before him.  
"Alex," He greeted. "slept well?" He asked and for a nano-second his eyes flickered to Pepper, seeing her unnerved expression and the redness that spread on her face. "I wanted to go collect the eggs and give a few carrots to Mildred. Care to join, Pepper?"

**Leave a little love (:**

**P.S.: though the sneak might sound like it, there's no fight in the next chapter, don't worry. :D**


	26. Me and Tennessee

**Chapter 26: Me and Tennessee**

**Hello everyone! **

**Thank you all so much for your really nice reviews. I am overwhelmed. I never imagined this Story getting 100 reviews, let alone more than 500! I am so humbled by your support and kindness, I cant say anything.**

** I really hope to at least cater to your needs a little bit with this chapter and that you like this one.  
It was a lot of work and I am not entirely happy how it turned out in some parts and I am pretty happy with how it turned out in other parts. So this might be a wild ride :D **

**As the next chapter is already mostly written out, yet needs major editing, I'll try to put it out within the next two weeks.**

**Disclaimer: There are probably a lot of mistakes in here. I reread and re-edited this chapter so much, I basically went blind at one point. But you know the drill, cause I said it before: If you find a ****mistake congratulations, you may keep it. ;-)**

**But enough talking on my part, lets go.**

**Song: Me and Tennessee by Gwyneth Paltrow and Tim McGraw**

* * *

**Me and Tennessee**

"You owe me two more minutes." Yes it was cheating, yes she hated it, but she had done it twice this night already, so what more could it hurt.

This time neither was kissing the other, cause they met half way. Their mouthes moved in sync, while his hands moved to their new favorite places on earth, her hair and her waist. Their make out session was interrupted by the first beams of sunlight hitting them in the face and they broke apart, but Tony leaned his forehead against hers once more, gazing down at her lovingly with a stupid smile on his face, while Pepper peered up at him through her lashes.

"Was that an answer?" Tony asked somewhat out of breath, the stupid grin still on his face.

"Not yet." Pepper answered with a grin playing her own features, still catching her breath herself. She licked her lips and found she could still taste him, she liked that very much.

"What was it then?" He asked, pulling back a little to look at her properly, but not willing to let completely go just yet.

"An argument." Pepper told him, the knowing grin still on her face and stepped out of his embrace. She started heading back towards the house and after a few steps the reality of it all came crashing down on her. She was not sure where to go from here. She had cheated on Alex and she knew she needed to brake things off with him, if she wanted to have a shot with Tony at all. Yet there still was that tiny part of her that wasn't entirely sure if breaking up with Alex really was the right decision and that feared she would get hurt by Tony in the long run.  
But at the moment every part of her body was screaming at her to just screw it -literally speaking- and get it on with Tony. She was on such an endorphin high and couldn't think straight at the moment. Her thoughts were all over the place, running back and forth in her head.  
Maybe for the first time Tony was actually right. She needed time to think this over. Get her feelings straight and in a row and figure out what she wanted, what she truly wanted. It had been a long and eventful day and night and an emotional rollercoaster, going from confused and frustrated to losing it all, to being extremely happy, back to being confused and hurt, through blissful happiness again, to hating herself for what she did, to needing to talk to Tony, over being shocked and in awe at the same time, back to happily kissing each other for the third friggin time in one night and all the way around to the start to being confused. All of that required some sort of comprehension and time to sink in.  
Pepper felt like she needed guidance in this whole dilemma, someone to talk to and help her untie the knot that was in her head.

When she reentered the house, it was just quarter past five, which meant it was already quarter past six in New York, where Lisa currently was for her law firm. Knowing her, she was up already, always rising at six, to get some sports in before work.

After Pepper snuck her phone and headset from their room, she went back downstairs and sat down on one of the deckchairs on the porch. She dialed Lisa's number and hit call.

Two toots in Lisa picked up, sounding out of breath.

"This is Lisa speaking?"

"Good morning, Lisa." Pepper greeted warmly and smiled, realizing how much she missed her best friend. "Doing cardio?"

"Pep! I haven't heard from you in forever. Why are you up? It's like five in Texas…" She said her panting accelerating.

"Yeah, I know I'm a bad friend… I couldn't sleep." She sighed down the line and heard something whirring on the other end. "What are you doing? Indoor cycling?"

"Cross Trainer." Came Lisas curt reply. "Give me one minute, I only have point two miles left…" The whirring on her side got even louder and faster.

Pepper waited patiently and observed Tony in the distance with his arms leaning on the fence of the paddock, facing the other direction, apparently deep in thought. She had been daydreaming, feeling the sleepless night starting to get to her and flinched when Lisa suddenly spoke again. "Whew. Sorry, but now I'm done. So what's up? Why couldn't you sleep?"

"Uhm…" Pepper needed a moment to refocus. So much had happened that night and she didn't know where to start. "I was at Mimi's and Bo's yesterday, actually we all were and she said something about me and Alex and it made me think…"

"I hope you offered my greetings! Ok, what did she say?" Lisa asked and Pepper heard the hiss of a bottle being opened.

"Mimi told me to say hi." Pepper answered her first question happily and then got more serious. "We talked about my relationship and she said that I looked like I was missing something, seeing Tony and Emily together. I told her how much I love Alex and how much I enjoy being with him, but she just kept rambling about Tony."

"Okay…" Lisa mumbled sounding a little distant.

"I don't know, it just got to me." She confessed. "Honestly don't know what happened or why it happened, but I just couldn't sleep and I went outside to clear my head, you know?" Pepper rambled on, not really giving Lisa a chance to say something. "And he must have seen me leave, because he followed me and was suddenly behind me. I… uhm… I don't know…" Pepper hesitated, not sure how her oldest friend would react to her cheating.

"Uhu… Go on." Came from the other end of the line.

"Well, something… snapped." Pepper concluded.

"What do you mean snapped?" Lisa asked from the other side. "Did you guys fight?" She asked worried.

"Well," She huffed. "not exactly." Pepper breathed out and went quiet again.

Lisa squealed directly into the phone, and Pepper could have sworn, she was now partly deaf. "Oh my god! He asked you to marry him!"

"What?" Pepper hadn't expected this reaction. "No. Why would he ask me to marry him?"

"Because he's head over heels in love with you! And you are, too." The last part was spoken very softly and Pepper felt a shiver rund down her spine when she thought back to Tony telling her he was in love with her.

"Yes, I am." She finally confessed to her and warmth spread through her whole body. It felt so damn good finally admitting it and saying it out loud.

"Ok, so he didn't ask you to marry him." Her voice sounded actually a bit disappointed. "What happened then? What do you mean with snapped?" She asked urgently.

"We… kissed." Pepper stated and couldn't suppress the smile forming on her face. At the same time though the guilt started blossoming inside her chest again.

"Aha…" Lisa sounded rather underwhelmed.

"And then we just sat together the whole night on the porch of my treehouse and talked. Just talked like that." Her min drifted back to the whee hours of the morning and the dark blue sky splattered with stars about their heads. The way he had been looking at her while they talked made her melt all over again. "Like we were the only two humans in the world. It was like there was no time anymore. Everything was so clear, and lay there right in our hands. Finally there weren't any complications anymore. I don't know why, but it was the most intense and intimate night of my life. He finally showed me who he really is…"

"Aww that sounds really romantic." Lisa cooed over the phone. "What did he say?" Now genuine interest peaked in her voice again. Pepper heard a phone ring somewhere in Lisas background. "Ah damn it, Pepper. I have to hurry, but please tell me quickly what did he say!"

"He told me he loves me. And that he wants to be with me. For real!" Her voice was barely louder than a whisper, as though it would become untrue if she spoke it out loud.

"Aww Pep, that's so romantic… I hope you said it back?!" Lisa demanded.

"Not exactly. But I think I want the same thing. Be with him, I mean. Gosh, this is all so nerve wrecking." She chuckled. "And new. I need to come to terms with it first."

"You need to tell me everything when you're back! But I am so sorry, I really have to go now. We'll catch up when I get back from New York, I'll be in litigation all day for the next few days. See ya, sweety." The line went dead when Lisa hung up, without waiting for her response.

Pepper let the phone fall from her hands down to her lap and reclined into the chair, fiddling with her phone absentmindedly when she was settled.

Tony had long since vanished into the abyss of the woods in the backyard, but Pepper still found her eyes searching for him between the trees.

Tony… Hearing his version about his fight against death had made it all the clearer how close Pepper had come to losing him. Everything had come back up again and it put things into perspective. Had Tony died, she wouldn't have been able to live with herself. She would have regretted never telling him how she felt about him, that she wanted to be with him, that of course she was always thinking about that night. Pepper bit her lip in thought, absentmindedly looking for traces of his taste lingering on her lips, aching to reminisce the feeling of his kiss. Tony was a good kisser, but she knew that before, yet know, that she was actually more than willing to reciprocate his kisses were out of this world. She could only Imagine what actually being with him must be like. The feel of his hands and lips mapping out her whole body, the of his muscles and skin beneath her hands, free to explore every inch of skin, the feel of his -

"Hey B." Came a sleep rumbled voice from behind her and Pepper flinched, not even having heard Alex approach her.

She felt heat rising in her face. She had basically been day dreaming about sleeping with Tony, while her still-boyfriend stood behind her.  
"Jesus, Alex." She panted and turns back around, not ready to face him just yet, not when she had been nearly caught red handed. The situation was overwhelming her, suffocating her, she felt like she still needed some alone time, but on the other hand she knew she'd never feel ready to face him after what she had done and sooner or later she had to talk to him. So she turned back around and forced a smile out. "Good morning. Did… uhm" God was she actually about to ask him if he saw her and Tony last night? Way to end thinks if he didn't. "Did you sleep well?" The question, that came out of her mouth surprised and relieved her at the same time.

"Not really," came his hoarse reply. "I woke around three o'clock and you were gone." He said, a little probingly, a little skeptical even, but Pepper managed to keep a calm demeanor on the outside and smiled sympathetically, but she felt her forehead tingling with sweat starting to rise, and her heartbeat accelerated rapidly, as adrenaline started rushing through her system with fear. "You know, I looked for you everywhere in the house, but I couldn't find you."

"Oh," Pepper began. She was a bad liar and knew it, but she wasn't ready to just break things off now. Especially when she felt like she hadn't even begun to proceed the things which had happened over the last 24 hours. "I couldn't, you know…" _Think Pepper, think. You need to make it believable._ "I couldn't sleep. Mimi said some stuff, brought back some memories… it got to me. And you know how I hate to lay awake, so I got up and went to the tree house. Just thinking things through…" She shrugged and tried to look nonchalant. _Might as well go with the truth, Pepper,_ she thought, though she knew it wasn't the whole truth.

"Jeez, Pepper. You could have woken me up and told me about it." Alex said with a smile and came up closer behind her, massaging her shoulders in what he thought was a soothing manner. "You know I'm always there for you."  
He didn't notice how Pepper tensed under his fingers and he missed her uncomfortable look. Physical attention from him was the last thing she wanted at the moment. He didn't repel her necessarily, but not even an hour ago she had her tongue down Tony's throat and had every intention of breaking up with the man before her. Somehow the physical attention felt like she was cheating all over again, but this time on Tony.

"Well, I didn't want to wake you." She responded after a second in low voice and a fake smile, she hoped he wouldn't see. "And I didn't want to talk…" _to you._ She finished her sentence in her head.

"Well, I can't even imagine how difficult it must be for you, being back at your childhood place, but… with your parents gone. You must miss them terribly." He stopped rubbing her back and Pepper was grateful for that. But it got worse, he came around and sat down in front of her grabbing her hands in his. "If you need to talk about it, just let me know. I'm here for you, beautiful." And then his lips were on hers.

Nothing. She felt nothing. Yes, his lips on hers were warm and soft and familiar and all that jazz, yet she instantly noticed the absence of the prickling sensation a goatee caused, he lacked the plumpness of Tony's lips and skill wise his kiss was a light year behind.

Not really kissing him back and not really enjoying it, yet still too unsure of how to proceed Pepper granted him the moment of comfort, though not moving a muscle herself before he pulled back and smiled at her. She awkwardly returned the smile and saw movement behind him on the lawn.

Tony had made his way back towards the house and he didn't look exactly thrilled at what he saw before him. Her eyes turned wide in guilt, dreading his reaction and what he might think. Alex turned and saw Tony stand behind him, one hand on the railing, one foot on the stairs, the other one still on the grass, dead in his tracks.

"Good morning Tony." Alex greeted happily as he noticed him and stood, not really noticing the tension, since Tony had put on his pokerface. He said he'd give Pepper time to decide, and he wouldn't ruin her ability to chose by actively taking that privilege from her, yet he felt like he was entitled to growl a little.

"Alex," He greeted. "slept well?" The snarl was evident in his voice only to Pepper and for a nano-second his eyes flickered to her, seeing the unnerved expression. "I wanted to go collect the eggs and give a few carrots to Mildred. Care to join, Pepper?" He asked her way too sweetly while sending a way too nice smile in her direction.

To prevent the situation from exploding she decided she needed to act. "Sure." She agreed and stood next to Alex. "I'll be back and make breakfast soon." She informed her still-boyfriend.

"Great, I'll go take a shower." He kissed her forehead, but Pepper had her eyes on Tony, who's hands clenched to tight fists and his stare was hard and icy, while his jaw was set.

As soon as Alex had turned and was back into the house she took Tony's arm and dragged him towards the stable. To say they were pacing there was an understatement and neither spoke a word until they were behind closed doors.

"What was that?" She demanded.

"I don't like you kissing him." He said bluntly, not even trying to sugar coat it. "Sorry, I have to be fair." He corrected himself, his face actually softening. "I don't like him kissing you and you letting him do it."

His words warmed her and she had to suppress a smile. "Tony," she said with a sigh. "You said, you'd give me a choice. And more importantly you promised to give me a little time. As of right know, he's still my boyfriend and as far as he is concerned it is his right to kiss me when he pleases." She stepped forward and put her hands on his crossed arm. "Whether you or I like it or not, that is how it is. At least at the moment."

"I still don't want to see -" In that moment it dawned on him. "Wait, are you telling me…" A grin spread on his features.

"I'm not telling you anything." Pepper said with a wicked grin.

"I think you need more arguments." He cooed and approached her like a lion his prey, while she backed away backwards, her arms now crossed. Yet her face was a bemused one when her back hit one of the stable doors.

"I don't think we should…" she started, but his hands went to her waist and she felt her walls breaking again. Gosh, this man was her undoing.

"I think, Miss Potts you obviously need more persuasion." He lowered his head down to hers and she welcomed him whole heartedly.  
Tony used the door behind her to press himself even closer to her and enjoy her every curve against his body. Unfortunately or fortunately, depending on the perspective, his body responded directly to her closeness and her own enthusiasm as he dug his hips into hers. Pepper gasped into his mouth in surprise and he used the opportunity to kiss her even deeper and more heatedly. When his hand wandered down her body she snapped back to reality and grabbed his hand before she pulled back.

"I'm sorry…" She started, not sure what to say or do. She'd be lying if she said her body didn't respond to his attention as well, but she wasn't ready to act on that just yet.

Tony groaned and buried his head in her shoulder, bringing some space between his lower parts and the woman between himself and the door. "Don't say anything." He groaned again, though this time in frustration. "Don't apologize. I am sorry, Pep. You don't have to apologize for anything. Its just… uhm, you kinda always had this effect on me and now that I actually get to touch… I get a little over-… uhm excited." He raised his eyes to hers and she was about to laugh, pressing her lips together desperately. "Why are you laughing?" He asked very uncomfortable.

"You're adorable, when you're rambling." She simply observed. "And you don't need to apologize either." Her features softened and she smiled warmly at him again. "I take it as a compliment. I just need a little time."

"Believe me, it is a compliment." He sighed and pushed back from her. His uncomfortable face while he tried to envision anything except the woman standing in front of him made her snicker a little. "Stop laughing. We could settle this in less than a minute if you wanted to." The comment made a belly laugh escape her.

Once Tony had calmed his little problem they gave the carrots to the horses, just enjoying each others company without saying much.

"Did my persuading work at least a little?" He asked sheepishly, the bowl with six eggs in hand before the reached the barn door.

"Honestly," she sighed and looked a little uncomfortable again. "I think you were right. I need time to think things through. And with Alex… give me a little time to break it off. He deserves an explanation and he deserves to not find out about this" she gestured between them "by accident."

"Okay." Tony said and sounded a little sad while he turned away from her.

"Tony," She started and her tone made him look at her. "That's not a no."

He smiled a little sadly back at her and remarked: "It's not a yes either."

"No, no." She looked at him, pleading with her eyes, which were filled with hurt and uncertainty. "I just think, if we want to have a chance here, a real chance, we need to make this right. I refuse to stumble into a relationship with so much still going on around it. You haven't even broken up with Emily. Officially I'm still with Alex. If we don't do it right, it will end in chaos. And -"

Tony interrupted her, before she could finish. "I know, I know they deserve better."

"No Tony, we deserve better, too. Like I told you once, I don't want to risk what we have to a hasty try of a relationship. I want us to be invincible."  
The first time she had said that all those month ago, she had broken his heart. This time, though it were the same words, they had a totally different meaning to them, they had so much more value to him. She wanted them to be real and not something solely born form chaos and desperation. He found he wanted that, too.

"Why are you always right." He deadpanned, but his mouth twitched in an annoyed smile.

"I think it's time to go back to the house." Pepper opened the door for him and let him through, closing it behind her again. They walked in silence over the grass along the trees, each minding their path. As they passed the swing memories from their first day in Texas crashed back into Tony's consciousness, making him stop dead in his tracks and he couldn't suppress the moan that escaped his throat.

Peppers head snapped toward him, mustering him with a concerned look. "Are you alright?" She turned on her heel and walked back over to where he had stopped.

"How am I supposed to behave myself around you now?" Without thinking about his actions, his hand that wasn't holding onto the bowl grabbed her waist and pulled her against himself again. Luckily at least one of Pepper's brain cells was still working and she managed to pull them behind the big tree that blogged the view from the patio, before something happened again.

"Tony, I thought we agreed on stopping this until both of us are free of… baggage." She tried to sound convincing but the small whimper that escaped her as he started nibbling at her neck made it somehow impossible to really make it believable that she wanted him to stop.

"But you are sooo irresistible." Tony hummed against her skin, his beard lightly scraping her neck. The sensation made goosebumps erupt all over her skin, but at the same time brought Pepper back to earth.

"Tony, as much as I love this…" she got out in between breathes as he was performing miracles on her neck and jaw and ear. Finally she was able to shove him away and get some space and air between them. "We have to stop this now."

He noticed her face was bright red and she was trying to avoid his eyes. Her behavior made him smirk even more. "At least tell me, you're as close to ravishing me as I am to ravish you."

The cold stare she gave him gave away that he was totally right and he smirked even more.  
"I'm serious here, Tony. I really don't want to get caught red handed."

"But doesn't that make it all the more exciting?"

"No." This time she looked determined and he knew the game was over. "It makes it even more wrong."

"Alright, alright." He sighed and finally let go of her waist. "But no more kissing that bloke." Her face told him he used the wrong euphemism. "Alright, no more kissing Alex." The last word he pronounced very disgruntled.

"Ok, I try to avoid it." Pepper agreed. "But same goes for Emily." She demanded and Tony smiled at her.

"Done. Anything else?"

"No I think that's it. But like I said, I just ask you to give me some time to break up with Alex gently. And I think Emily deserves the same."

"I promised to give you time, Pepper and I intend on keeping my promise. But that doesn't mean I won't try to persuade you one way or another." He smiled wickedly at her and kissed her quickly on the lips, but pulled back before she even registered what had happened and was on his way back to the house, whistling Old McDonald. He left her whole body tingling and yearning for a proper kiss. _Damn you Tony Stark for being addictive like a drug._ Once you started there was no stopping it again.

After a few deep, calming breathes Pepper returned to the house, but neither Tony nor one of the other occupants where somewhere to be seen. Deciding breakfast could wait a few more minutes until after she got properly dressed she headed upstairs to put on some proper clothing. Luckily for her, Alex seemed to be in the shower so she didn't need to face him just yet. It was going to be a nice day and she decided on white jeans shorts and a blue-white striped linen bottom down shirt.

On her way back down, she noticed the door to Tony's and Emily's room was open a fraction. She didn't want to snoop, but she saw Tony scrambling around the room looking for something. Not a second later she heard retching sounds for the adjourning bathroom.

"Are they fighting again?" Alex voice startled her the second time that morning and she nearly jumped a foot when he suddenly appeared behind her.

"Jeez Alex." Pepper said angrily herself now.

"Sorry, I didn't want to interrupt your snooping." He answered defensively.

"I wasn't snooping. I just heard someone being sick and wanted to make sure they're ok." Stupid. She was stupid. Spying on her love interest while her still-boyfriend was right behind her.

"Pepper are you ok? You're behaving strange since we're back from Mimi's and Bo's." He looked strangely at her, like he was suspecting something was going on.

"No, I'm good. Just… The last week was a little crazy, ok?" Without waiting for his reply she brushed past him. "I'm going to make breakfast now."

Alex cornered her again in the kitchen while she was preparing a batch of pancake batter. "Honey, you seem so stressed. What do you think about sending Tony and Emily away for today so we have the house to ourselves. Take a dip in the pond, relax." His tone was suggestively and it made Pepper go cold.

She needed to turn down his offer, but not too obviously.  
"I think it's rude to ask them to leave, Alex." She answered and was happy, because he would surely understand this argument.

"I have already spoken to Emily." He informed her, sounding equally happy. "She thinks it's a great idea and that we deserve some alone time."

"Great." Pepper said. Trying to sound enthusiastically and put on a fake smile, she hoped would suffice.

"Pep, what's wrong?" Alex asked again. "A few days ago you couldn't wait to get away from Tony and Emily and be alone, but now you don't look happy."

Tony took this moment to stride into the kitchen, phone in his hand.  
"Pepper, the board just called. There was a problem about the deal with JP International. Our stock points are about to drop 40 points. You as CEO need to come back immediately, maybe we can turn the deal still around."

* * *

**I know, I know the ending sucks. But I had to cut it at some point… **

**Anyways here's your sneak: **

_"_For the first time we were finally on the same page." Tears brimmed in her eyes and she looked down again.

Luckily Lisa was quick to pick up details and noticed it immediately: "Were?" She asked a little mortified.

**Ah don't we all love a bit of drama? :D  
Don't worry though, it's not for long. I promised you Pepperony all the way through the rest of the story and I am going to keep it. But without at least a little drama it would be boring, wouldn't it?**

**Leave a little Love (:**


	27. Temporary Bliss

**Chapter 27: Temporary Bliss**

**Hello guys, **

**First as always: Thanks for alle the great reviews. I love you all and your support! I can't believe were going to be hitting the 600 review mark soon! WOW! I am... I can't say anything. You made it: you rendered me speechless.**

**Second: I put out a disclaimer right here: Welcome to Phase IV. And what better way than to start the necxt Phase with a BOOM. So the next two chapters are going to be really angsty and very dramatic. If you don't want to read this, you can skip them. But don't worry it won't be for long. I don't want to spoil too much, but before anyone gets impatient, we're returning to Pepperony very very soon (Chapter 29 *hint, hint*) and we will have a happy ending.  
Also I decided to continue this story for longer than I anticipated and there will be a Phase V, if only a short one. Maybe I will post this in a separate story as a sequel, I don't know yet.**

**Third: I hope to put the next chapter out before easter, but please don't be mad if I cant keep that deadline... The world wide pandemic is pretty hard on me and my family and I am super stressed because of it, cause I worry and thus take care for people close to me on top of a full-time job, who are at high risk, like my Nana who had chronic pneumonia for years and my mom who is a cancer survivor.  
Like I said before I thank everyone of you who is out there working, as well as everybody who is staying at home! Please be safe and stay healthy.**

**Fourth: Big thank you to mrsstark83! Girl, I am really happy to have made a friend through this website! I'm so thankful for your support here and your ideas! **

**Now buckle up, it's going to be a wild ride :D**

**Song: Temporary Bliss by The Cab**

* * *

**Temporary Bliss**

"Pepper, the board just called. There was a problem about the deal with JP International. Our stock points are about to drop 40 points. You as CEO need to come back immediately, maybe we can turn the deal still around."

She looked at Tony, totally bewildered. The deal with JP International had been standing for weeks. Also her proxy was head of the project deal, so surely he could handle it.  
"Oh. That's not good." She started. Still it wasn't her responsibility. "Couldn't Handerson -"

"Handerson wants you to call him back immediately and fly home as soon as possible. The Stark jet will be here in a few hours." His voice was stern and demanding. And then she realized: Tony was giving her a way out.

She nodded imperceptibly at Tony and he saw a glint in her eye return. "Alex, I'm so sorry. I need to make this call…" She turned toward her still-boyfriend and looked apologetic at him.

"Seriously? I haven't really seen you all vacation. This was supposed to be our time." Alex was mad, there was no doubt about that, the way he was glaring at her and the angry twitch his eyebrow made were dead give aways. He then suddenly turned toward Tony. "Could you give us a moment?" He was very unnerved.

"Excuse me?" Tony asked back, irritated.

"Yeah my girlfriend spent more time with you this vacation, than with me, her boyfriend and now you come here telling us she has to go home after you coincidentally had a fight with your girlfriend? I call bullshit. Now please excuse me, when I want a word with my girlfriend in private, would you?" He mock asked.

"I don't see why you can't talk to her while I'm here." Tony's voice was vibrating and barely more than a growl. He was bad at handling backlash from anybody and now one of his biggest competitors for Pepper's heart wanted to throw him out? There was no way Alex was getting some time alone with her anymore. "And frankly I think this is between Pepper and I, so why don't you get the hell out of here?"

"Me? You spent more time with her here than I did. You use up all of her energy and attention, because your relationship is going south. When you freaked out on your girlfriend she was by your side. Even this morning you cut in when she was in distress because of her past here." Alex's head was bright red now his voice growing louder every second. He even took a step forward, seizing Tony up and down.

"Excuse me, that you weren't even dressed and showed no interest in anything about the property so far. Excuse me that she obviously likes spending time with me better than spending time with you! I mean look at you, you pathetic bloke. You don't even notice she has an aff-" Tony all but spat in his face.

"Tony!" Pepper cut in and warned before he would reveal what happened between them out of pure spite.

But before Pepper could say anything further Alex interjected, thinking he was defending her. "Grow up Stark, just because you can't do healthy relationships doesn't mean you are allowed to intrude into ours. She deserves a bit of free time from you and this slave house you call company. So who the fuck cares if you lose a few million dollars and a few stock points over a project. I think you could afford it, Stark. How do ya call yourself? Genius, billionaire, playboy? Well at least two of them are true." His laugh was fake and condescending.

Pepper could sense Tony was about to explode, unconsciously Alex was feeding his fear of losing Pepper to him. And to be honest he was angering Pepper as well now. He had been so understanding in the beginning of their relationship with her crazy schedule, but time after time he had complained about her coming home late, about her not being able to drop everything and going away over the weekend, and it had been HIM who had invited Tony and Emily in the first place.

"Alex," Pepper's voice was calm, but meant business and no messing around, "You have no business talking about my job. I'm CEO of one of the biggest companies in the world. That means I'm responsible for thousands of employees, for thousands of people needing to feed their families. When a deal goes south I am responsible. I have to take that call and maybe I have to fly back to California today. That's not how we planned it, but it is what it is." Pepper closed her eyes for a second and then turned to Tony. "Tony, I call Handerson and see what happened and what needs to be done."

"I can stay and maybe help." He offered giving Alex a hard look at the same moment.

"No. You have done enough for the moment. I get back to you as soon as I know what's going on." Her voice was still firm and all softness was gone from it. Maybe he had gone too far, he figured. Nearly telling Alex about last night hadn't been his best move obviously.

"But -" Tony tried.

"B-" Alex said at the same time, both men looking at each other coldly.

"No, both of you: stop. I go take that call. Someone needs to finish those pancakes before they all burn, the other one can set the table outside." She left the kitchen still fuming. _I'm choosing between a kindergarten-child and an idiot,_ she thought, and wasn't entirely sure whom was who.

It turned out she really wasn't needed back in Los Angeles, yet she stood there listening to the old guy rambling on, phone in her right hand pressed to her right ear. She tried concentrating on what Handerson was telling her, but found it hard. Her mind kept going back to Tony. She disliked fighting with him and he was right: Alex didn't even notice things were ging south between them. Soon she had no idea what the man on the other side of the line was telling her, because Pepper was too absorbed in her own thoughts.

She found Tony in her fathers old library, arms crossed over his chest looking at the books in the shelves. How could she stay mad at him when he looked so adorable and somewhat out of place in a room full of old-fashioned books. A man so fascinated and handy with tech being so engrossed in one of the oldest arts. She moved up quietly behind him and snuck her arms around his middle and lay her head against his back in between his shoulders, while inhaling his scent before letting out a long sigh.

"I'm sorry." She confessed."And thank you for giving me a way out."  
Tony still had is armes crossed, but she noticed his muscles soften underneath her touch.  
"Are you mad at me?" Pepper asked sweetly over his shoulder, trying to catch his eye, but his remained glued to the books. "Oh come on, look at me." She kissed his neck lightly, with feathery movements. After a few more kisses and persuasion on Pepper's side Tony finally gave in and turned around to look at her.

"I'm sorry, Pep. I didn't want to lash out on him." He followed his words with a punctuated kiss to her temple and backed off, sitting in one of her fathers dark and well used leather chairs.

"Tony, -" She started as soon as he left her embrace with a soft smile, but he didn't let her even start.

"I'm sorry, but Alex he just… Since yesterday… I don't want…"

Now Pepper stopped him when her hands placed gently left and right to frame his face.

"I understand if you don't want to leave." He confessed finally, but looked not entirely sure.

The soft smile grew bigger on her face. "The jet will be here in three hours."

Tony had reassured Pepper again he was going to break up with Emily, but he wanted to do it right and most importantly in private, instead of openly, on vacation with another couple still present. Before Pepper could say anything in return, Emily burst into their room.

"Sorry to interrupt, but Pepper could I talk to you for a second?" She asked, looking unhappy, pale and somewhat sweaty. Pepper's heart sank, had she figured out what was going on between her and Tony, would she be picking a fight, screaming and calling her names? What was even worse, Pepper wouldn't, no couldn't deny any of her accusations and Emily had every right to rage.

"Uhm…" Pepper stuttered, "O- ok…" Without looking at Tony she followed the brunette out of the room and into the kitchen. Emily got a bottle of water from the fridge and opened the cap, carefully taking a tiny sip of water.

"Emily?" Pepper asked carefully, still waiting for the hammer to fall.

The other woman gave no answer, she just turned, even paler than before. "I…" And before her eyes, Emily's legs gave way. She crashed to the floor, panting, cold sweat running down her body.

"Oh my god!" Pepper gasped. "Tony, Alex" she shouted and heard the guys running towards her from different parts of the house. "Quick!" She then looked down at the woman under her hands, "It's ok, breath, breath. Steady." Pepper grabbed a towel from near by and wetted it quickly, before gently touching her forehead. Alex was the first one to arrive in the kitchen and knelt beside Emily.

"What happened?" He asked Pepper, looking down an the other woman, feeling for her pulse and how fast her heart was beating.

"I don't know." Pepper admitted. "She wanted to talk to me and just broke down."

"Emily," Alex talked to her in a calm and soothing voice. "Can you hear me?" Emily nodded, eyes still wide and white as a sheet.

"Ok, we'll put your legs up onto a chair, you understand? Get the blood back into your head to your brain." Tony, who was now standing in the door, immediately grabbed a chair from the kitchen table and brought it over to Alex. He carefully placed Emily's legs on top and asked Pepper to place another towel under her head. Tony snatched the towel from Pepper's hands, placed it under Emily's head and continued stroking her hair and forehead lovingly.

Something fuzzy mad its way into Pepper's stomach at the way Tony was looking down at Emily, yes something fuzzy and angry. _You are a horrible person, Pepper. You envy a sick person._

"Are you sick?" Alex asked Emily, who was crying now and she nodded. "Do you feel feverish?" Emily nodded again, while taking a deep breath.

"Ever since the barbecue at Bo's I felt sick." She brought out, while Tony shhed softly at her, trying to calm her down so her pulse would go even higher. "At first I thought I had one too many beers, because I had a headache all day and my stomach was quite upset. I wanted to ask Pepper if she had Tylenol and Peptobismol but before I could, everything just turned black… God I'm so sorry." She placed her hand over her eyes in embarrassment.

Pepper felt like the weight of the world was lifted from her shoulders, before it came crashing back down on her, this girl had been sick and just wanted to ask for help and she had only thought about how bad she felt for cheating on her with her boyfriend. She really hated the chaos cheating caused in everybody's life. She really hated cheating. Period. And she hated herself for the person she had become. But what was she supposed to do? She couldn't just pretend that nothing had changed in the last few days, she couldn't just pretend that nothing had happened between her and Tony, not when her heart and head finally were on the same page and when in the first time in forever Pepper was finally sure of what she truly wanted: she wanted to be with him.

"I'm no doctor, but from what it sounds like you seem to have a heatstroke. The cold, headache, sickness all classical symptoms. You should rest the rest of the day and preferably stay inside, where the AC is running." Alex concluded and helped Emily to slowly sit back up and handed her the water bottle. "But if it's not better by tomorrow, I suggest we go and see the doctor, okay?" He warned and looked at Pepper and Tony as well, to make sure they're his witnesses.

"I'll make sure of that." Tony said. A few minutes ago he wanted to break up with Emily, now his voice was still laced with concern. The fuzzy creature in Pepper's stomach growled angrily as it realized the undertone. _Get yourself together, Pepper._

"I will call ahead and make an appointment with your physician." Pepper said and stood, taking out her phone and going through her contacts.

Alex and Emily looked at her quizzically and she remembered she had yet to tell them about going home early. "Uhm, the jet will be here in three hours. Tony and I have to return to California." She hesitated when she saw Alex disappointed and angered expression.

"Emily, I think it's best when you come with me. You're sick, you should see a doctor. And I want you close as long as you're sick." Tony said softly to his still-girlfriend and put his hands on her shoulders.

"Pepper, can we talk for a second?" Alex asked. Pepper looked over at Tony, but he didn't look back at her. he was too busy studying his _girlfriends_ face carefully. He didn't even recognize Pepper was about to leave the room with Alex. Though she felt uncomfortable she nodded at Alex and followed him outside.

When they reached the front porch she started before he could say something. "Alex, I don't wanna fight." Her voice was sad, almost pleading. "But I can't just -"

"I don't wanna fight either, B." He interrupted her and took hold of her hand. "I am sorry for the scene I caused before. It's just so frustrating… We barely had time to ourselves here and I was looking forward to our first vacation. But I knew when I got involved with you that your job almost always comes first, and while I'm not happy about it, I have to accept it." He smiled encouragingly at her and she smiled back, hoping her expression matched his. "And I am sure you'll make it up to me somehow." He told her with a grin, while carefully taking hold of her face and giving her a sweet, deep kiss.

_Alright, no more kissing Alex. - But same goes for Emily. _The words echoed in her head and got louder and louder with every split second he touched, until they made her break the kiss far sooner than she normally would. Instead of letting her go, Alex caught her in a deep and intimate hug, like he was telling her he was not willing to let her go.

"I love you, Pepper." He whispered the words into her hair like they were a prayer, but instead of feeling a familiar warmth and happiness, Pepper felt dread and overwhelming guilt flood her systems and mix with insecurity about Tony and Emily. She closed her eyes for a second and took a deep breath to calm herself, to keep herself from crying for how unfair all of this was. Fortunately Alex took her sadness and sigh as contend, instead of what it truly was: fear. He let her go and she smiled sadly at him.

"I have to go pack." She told him and stepped out of reach.

As soon as she was up the stairs the tears came flowing freely. How could she possible break up with him. He deserved better than that, than her.

"Pep, are you ok?" Tony's voice made her whip around. He stood in the doorway to her and Alex's room observing her. When he saw her tear stained face his eyes turned so unbelievably soft and were so full of concern and fear, she felt even worse. What had this all to be so complicated. "What happened?" He asked, like a small boy who saw his mother crying, almost too afraid to ask.

"Nothing, nothing." She tried to sound reassuring and quickly wiped away her tears. "We… we're going home." She smiled at him, pretty lopsided and turned back around to the bag that was already placed on the bed. She couldn't deal with him right now. She needed a little space to think and get her feelings straight.

There was a pregnant silence between them as she put things into her bag and she wondered if he had stepped away.

"Are you -" Tony begun, his voice wavering, but he stopped immediately when he heard footsteps on the stairs. When Pepper turned to look at him, he was already gone, instead she saw Alex coming through the doorway and her heart sunk again.

"Oh you're almost done." He smiled and reached for his own bag.

* * *

The flight had been pretty quiet. Emily had lain down in the small bedroom, still feeling very sick and weak, Alex had been sitting in one of the booths, busy typing away on his laptop, probably mailing with his friends, that he was coming home early or playing on of his computer games and Pepper had been sitting in another booth across from Tony busy with writing mails back and forth with Handerson and the board, while catching up on the nearly failed project. Tony had been supposed to do the same - and he had even been holding his mobile phone in one hand the whole time - had just been staring into the void. She wasn't sure what he was thinking about, but he wore a thoughtful, serious expression, his eyes flickering over to the bedroom door every now and then.

Shortly before they touched ground, Emily returned from the bedroom and sat beside Tony, stating she felt slightly better, but still a little uneasy in the stomach. She smiled weakly at Tony and out of the corner of her eye, Pepper saw him kissing her forehead softly, before hugging her close.

The monster i her stomach demanded salvation and for Pepper to rip Emily to pieces, but Pepper just gathered her laptop and phone and changed to another seat, no so coincidentally next to Alex.

After their landing Pepper packed her belongings up in her carry-on bag when Alex appeared beside her and took it from her hands, offering to carry it for her. She gladly handed it over and followed him to the door.  
When she stepped outside she saw what looked like Tony pulling back from a kiss he shared with Emily. When he looked up he caught her eye and hold her sight for a moment before he stepped back and walked back towards the back entrance of the jet.

As soon as they were all off the plane they would go separate ways for at least a few days, it was the last time they would be in close proximity with both of them still beging in a relationship, and she couldn't help but wondered if Tony was still feeling the same way he did yesterday and this morning. And she wondered if he feared the same, that the next time they meet only one of them would be single. There were things still left unspoken between them and before returning to the real world she wanted, no needed to give them a chance to speak them out. "I'll meet you outside, Alex. I need to talk to Tony for a second." She squeezed his shoulder and gave her still-boyfriend a sweet smile as to reassure him.

Tony had already entered the plane through the other door, but wasn't quite looking at her, his gaze fixated on the floor, his body casually leant against the backside of one of the plane seats, with his arms crossed and though he didn't even try to catch her eye, Pepper knew he was waiting for her.

"Don't take to long, it's already getting dark out." Alex answered and kissed her cheek pointedly. She mouthed a thank you in his direction and moved over to where Tony stood, but said nothing, waiting for him to speak the words he hadn't gotten to in Texas. She leaned her hip against one of the armrests and mimicked his position with her arms crossed. The silence stretched over a few moments, and they just started at each other, searching the others features for answers to questions yet to ask.

"What's wrong?" She asked softly when he never said a word. She knew it was a stupid question, cause she knew what was going through his head. She was asking herself the same questions.

"Are you sure of this?" Tony asked eventually, holding her gaze questioningly.

Pepper couldn't help the smile that involuntarily spread across her face and noticed her heart beat accelerating and the familiar warmth spread through her. She loved his vulnerability, the way he finally showed all of his emotions. It made her feel important and loved.

"I am." She simply stated in return.

When he didn't answer her stomach clenched and the monster roared again. His guilty face made her concern grow even more. It was written all over her face, he was worried. For Emily and for Pepper and their possible relationship. He was torn what to do.

Pepper knew she had to lay it all on the line. She pushed herself away from the seat and stood directly before him, her hands prying his apart and placing them on her hip, her own hands carefully cradling his neck. "I am sure, Tony. I finally know what I want, with all of my heart. I just don't know how I'm supposed to break his."  
He nodded understandingly, but kept quiet.  
"Are you still sure?" Pepper asked carefully eyes fixed on her hands, not daring to look at him, because she was afraid what she might find there.

It maybe took a second top long to answer her, but eventually he talked: "Pep, look at me. I am sure. It's just... I'm... It's been a long day." Tony just looked at her with big brown eyes. Before she could contain himself she reached down and kissed him sweetly and luckily he replied whole heartedly. Pepper was happy to feel him close again, having missed the feeling of his lips on hers. When they broke apart shortly after, he smiled at her, the familiar spark in his eye having returned.

"By the way: that was an argument." He retorted her own words back at her as he went for the exit.

Her laugh was music in his ears.

* * *

The next few days Pepper had barely seen either Tony or Alex.

Alex was always busy with work and the project he was working on with Rhodey, only asking her for lunch once or twice. Pepper wasn't really sad about it, it meant she had time plotting her breakup, without actually having to go through with it and didn't need to pretend they were still happy on the other hand.

Also Lisa had called two days after they came home and asked Pepper if she wanted to come over on Friday to her house to catch up and after everything that had happened between her and Tony she was more than happy to oblige. She also was looking forward to get some advice from her best friend on the best way to break up with Alex, without breaking his heart completely.

What she was sad about how ever was Tony's lack of presence in either her private life and at work.

Since their conversation - and kiss - in the airplane Tony hadn't so much as send her a message he wasn't coming to their meetings at Stark's due personal reasons. Apart from that, he didn't answer her mails, calls, sms and even a request from her placed through JARVIS. She followed the news like a maniac to figure out if he was on a mission, but Iron Man was nowhere to be seen and JARVIS had assured her he would inform her as soon as Tony would be flying out. Yet she never received a call.

She was worried, that maybe Tony had changed his mind after all, that everything they had had in Texas had only been short-lived and in the moment, not to last in everyday life, while the monster inside of her was having a field day.

After five days without getting any note from Tony he finally called her. She had just entered her car and put the key into the ignition, ready to drive over to Lisa's when her phone chimed. She recognized the ring tone immediately and scrambled for her purse on the passenger seat. Tony's photo smiled at her from the screen and she quickly pressed the answer button.

"Hey you." She greeted into the speaker and smiled despite herself. "Long time no hear."

"Hi Pepper." At first she didn't notice the lack of lightness and presence of seriousness in his voice.

"What do you think about dinner tonight?" Pepper asked cheerfully. "I haven't talked to Alex yet, but he's busy with a project and I am alone tonight. I know we said to first break it off… But I haven't seen you in forever. And to be honest I miss you." She smiled down the phone again. God she turned into a lovesick teenager.

"Uhm… I'd love to see you, but… We need to talk. I can't leave Emily. Not right now at least…"

"Wha… I don't under…" She stuttered, cold washing over her. "I thought we… in Texas. We agreed… Why?" Her voice was shaking, and her thoughts were spinning. Pure exasperation washed over her. When Tony spoke she barely realized his words at first. Two minutes later the phone fell from her hands, her face went white and tears started brimming in the back of eyes.

"Pepper, Pepper?" Tony's voice came quietly from the phone outlet.

"Don't." She said toneless as soon as she picked the phone back up and ended the call without waiting for any more words. Her whole body felt numb, like life itself had left her and had only left an empty shell. Involuntarily she chuckled at the irony of her last thought, though the laughter soon turned into dry sobs until the tears streamed freely.  
When she had calmed herself down again Pepper finally drove to her best friend. She was more than thankful for Lisa's return, she needed that shoulder to cry on now.

"Pepper, there you are!" Lisa greeted her excitedly at the door. "We were all waiting for you." The giddy smile she wore should have been a dead give away that there was something going on, but Pepper was too absorbed in her own despair to notice anything.

Unfortunately Lisa wasn't alone. In fact there was a whole party going on and when Pepper stepped into the spacious living room everyone stepped aside, making way for her. Alex was right there in the middle of the circle, surrounded by it looked like everyone Pepper had ever met, in a dark suit, slowly getting down on one knee.  
"Virginia Potts, around a year ago I got invited to a party and I never thought that day, that small birthday house-party would change my life forever. But it did. It was the day you came into my life." His voice was filled with admiration, love and affection and his eyes were full of hope and happiness.

"Alex -" Pepper tried to interject, hoping he would stop, before he made a foul out of both of them. The tears in her eyes were threatening to spill over again, not because of happiness, but because too much had happened in the last hour and because she never wanted it to get so out of hand.

Unfortunately he mistook her whimper and her tears as tears of joy and continued, "That last year, you changed me so much. Because of you I became more of a man, I ever dreamed of being capable of and because of you I still want to be better each day than the day before. I know you are strong and independent, and one hell of a woman. But I want all of that in my life, so I ask you if you want me in you life, forever? Will you marry me?" With his last sentence he pulled the teal blue box from his pocket and opened it to her, revealing a 1.5 carat clear diamond ring.

Pepper bid back the tears, not wanting to embarrass herself or himself even further and stepped forward, toward him so only he could hear her. "Alex, stand up please." He looked at her quizzically, fear and rejection running over his face, but did as he was told. "I need time to think about it." She really didn't want to break up with him in front of all those people, though now a break up was inevitable, and he probably knew that.

He looked at her irritated, but then nodded sharply, his jaw set and closed the box, shoving it back into his pocket and taking a step back from her.

"Lisa?" Not able to hold back the tears any longer, Pepper looked frantically around for Lisa. "LISA?" Tears blurred her vision and dripped down onto her light gray blazer. She, noticing her despair, rushed forward and grabbed her arm, supporting her best friend and lead her to the master bathroom, before locking the door behind them. Pepper sat down on the carpet and leaned against the bathtub.

"Pepper, what's wrong?" Lisa asked, sitting down next to her onto the closed toilet, not angry, but worried.

"I… I can't marry him, Lisa." Pepper brought to through tears. She wanted to ask her friend why she was part of this whole charade, hadn't she listened to her on the phone a week ago? Was this her way of telling her she didn't want her to leave Alex and be with Tony?

Before Pepper could ask the question, Lisa brought forward her own question. "But, I thought you were so happy in Texas? And the night at the treehouse? You told me you want be with him as well. You were so excited." It dawned on Pepper that there had been a big misunderstanding between herself and her best friend.

She closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the tub softly, taking a big, defeated breath, while the tears continued streaming down her face. "You thought I was talking about Alex." It wasn't a question, it was a conclusion and when she opened her eyes again she saw she was right.

Lisa looked at her and Pepper saw the look on her face change from confusion over wonder to realization as her eyes went wide and her mouth gaped open. "No way." Was all she could say. Pepper didn't need to say anything the guilty look on her face gave her away instantly. "Why? How? I… Pepper? Why?" It was a rare occasion that her best friend was rendered speechless, but know Lisa Gardner was.

Another sob built in her throat, and all Pepper could do was shrug.

"I mean, you've been in love with him for years." Lisa started explaining, more to herself. She was that type of friend to never question your action or judging you, rather looking for a valuable explanation. "Honey, are you sure about this?" She asked softly, referring to possibly leaving Alex and getting together with Tony.

Pepper nodded and looked up at her after wiping her eyes. "I am. I… I was." The tears came again and Pepper buried her face in her hands, sobbing uncontrollably. After a while she finally calmed down, her tears run dry. "Alex deserves better than a cheating girlfriend. And I want Tony with every fibre of my being. I really wanted to be with him." She stopped with a sigh, just feeling empty and numb. Still she couldn't contain the words that tumbled out her mouth and they ripped her appart from the inside out. "For the first time we were finally on the same page." Tears brimmed again in her eyes and she looked down again.

Luckily Lisa was quick to pick up details and noticed it immediately: "Were?" She asked a little mortified.

And when Pepper looked up with watery, bloodshot eyes she knew she had every reason to be: "Emily is pregnant."

* * *

**Fifth: Everything I ever said in my authors notes still applies. What ever this means is for you to find out ;-) Also thanks for some of your great inspirations in the reviews! **

**Here's your sneak peak:**

Instead of telling him off like she had anticipated, her mouth - though she suspected, actually it was her heart - betrayed her. "How? Tell me how. How can we rewrite the stars?"

**I know it's cliche, but what can I say. We're nearing our happy end. **


	28. Rewrite the Stars

**Chapter 28: Rewrite the Stars**

**Hey everyone and happy easter!**

**A little late but still nearly on time. Today is easter, I said til easter! I hope you're all still staying home and healthy.**

**As always: Thanks for your comments! I read and loved every single one of them.**

**This is the next (and last) very angsty and sad chapter and things are looking dark, but they will brighten in the following chapters. Still if you want fluff, you probably should skip this chapter. **

**The next one I hope to put out by April 30th. Read the sneak below for more information. (:**

**Also because of Corona and quarantine I started a new story (I had to get it out of my head), I haven't published yet. It's going to be a mostly fluff piece about Pepperony stuck in quarantine at her parents house with her parents, before they become a couple. It's going to have lots of tension and funny and awkward situations. If you're interested in reading it, keep an eye open and let me know if you're even interested in reading something like that.**

**This Chapters dialogue partly comes from the song "Rewrite the stars" from The Greatest Showmann, but I could imagine the two of them soo well in this situation saying those words. **

**Song: Rewrite the Stars by Zendaya and Zac Efron - The Greatest Showman**

* * *

**Rewrite the Stars**

He had no idea how they had gotten here, into this situation. It was supposed to be a normal business meeting with one of their future partners in green energy in New York.

After his call Pepper had refused to call him back or answer his texts. After three hours of trying to reach her he finally got a hold of Lisa, who had told him he was a dick and he should stay away from Pepper in the future. To say the mood between him and Pepper now was bad would be an Hughe understatement. As soon as he'd catch her eye, which happened rarely, because she refused to acknowledge his presents, she'd look away pointedly. But he always caught a trace of unbearable sadness and guilt in her eyes and it killed him, knowing he was the source of said feelings.

Of course Pepper had a every right to be mad at him. Hell he was mad as hell at himself. He was fairly sure he had used protection every time he had been with Emily, but you know what they say, there is still a one in a hundred chance. Leave it to his luck to be the one in one hundred.

But for him it didn't change anything… at first. He still wanted Pepper and she needed to know that, but at the same time he knew the chance of them ending up together was next to zero. He now had responsibility for a child. But he missed her. There was barely a day going by without missing her. Problem was even now, after two weeks of ignoring him and countless meetings together without much more than a cold and distant hello, she still refused to talk with him or even be in the same room alone for more than two minutes..

But the one in a hundred chance struck again and this time in his favor:

Unbestknown to him the deposition had really been in jeopardy when they had returned and now Stark Industries really was bound to lose a very high amount of money as well as the entire Stark Tower project. In order to prevent that from happening Pepper decided to just fly the entire executive board out to New York to save the deal with JP International. Luckily for him, Tony was part of the executive board.

Two and a half hours into the meeting with JP International a code black had been set off and Tony and Pepper had gotten stuck in one of the managers offices for their own safety. The doors were locked and security had only informed them they must remain that way until the premises was cleared.

She hadn't even looked at him once since they were put in his office and had even asked to be put in a separate office. Conversation between them had been kept to an absolute minimum and the silence in the room was deafening, before he decided to speak up again.

"How long have we ben stuck, Pepper?" Tony asked pacing up and down the room, his tie hanging loosely around his neck.

"It's 43 minutes now. 2 minutes more than the last time you asked and 6 minutes more than the time before that." Pepper answered, not even looking up from her Blackberry. If she was stuck here, she might as well get some e-mails done.

Or so she thought. Suddenly her phone turned off and just asked for a power connection. Her cord still lay in the meeting room, along with her handbag. With a loud huff Pepper threw her phone on the seat next to her on the grey couch, throwing her head back and and closing her eyes for a brief second.

"You ok?" Tony asked as he heard her sigh, concern laced his voice. Concern and longing so prominent even she couldn't pretend to not notice it.

"Yeah, I just hate… waiting. And doing nothing." Pepper answered and stood. She walked over to the large windows, overlooking Central Park. The sun was slowly sinking behind the skyscrapers, illuminating her in a lovely golden light.  
This was like her personal nightmare, being stuck in an office with Tony. For the first time in… since they knew each other actually, both had finally admitted their attraction toward each other. Finally she had found what she had been looking for her whole life with out even knowing, only to have it snatched from her in the last minute. She hadn't returned Tony's calls or text because she was mad at him. How could she be mad at him? It had happened while he and Emily had still been a couple and things like that simply happened sometimes. No she hadn't talked to him, because she couldn't stand being near him after knowing he feels the same way about her, as she does and how it feels to be with him only to know she would never feel like this again. When Tony had told her Emily might be pregnant something in her had broken beyond repair.

"Don't you think we should…talk?" He asked warily and waited for her respond, but it never came.  
"Pepper, why are you not talking to me?" He asked a little sad, almost desperate.

"I talk to you." Came he short reply, but she never turned around.

"Yeah, when it is business related." Tony mumbled under his breath, though he knew exactly Pepper could hear him, still no response.  
Tony observed her for a second longer and then decided to speak his mind.  
"I didn't plan for this to happen, believe me."

"You don't have to explain anything to me." Pepper said and sounded defeated.

"I'm sorry." Tony simply offered. He saw her shoulders rise as if she was trying to protect herself against his words. She just sighed.

"Look I gave it a few thoughts over the last days." He stopped again and waited for a reaction. Any reaction. When none came he continued: "You know I want you."

Pepper sighed. He didn't know that any word he said cut a little deeper, were salt to an already bleeding wound. "Tony…" She started, but he continued on.

"It's not a secret I try to hide." His tone was stern, not a trace of irony or sarcasm laced his voice.

Her blouse clad shoulders stopped rising and falling. Pepper closed her eyes. She wasn't ready for this. "Tony, please. Don't…" She tried again, weakly.

Again he didn't let her finish and interrupted her quickly. He knew once she started talking he wouldn't be able to say what he was trying to tell her.

"I know you want me."

Goosebumps crawled over her skin, but not in pleasure. "Can we please not have this talk?" Pepper asked quietly as she finally turned to face him. Her eyes were bright, but whether it were reflections or tears that made them sparkle, he couldn't figure out.

"I don't see why. We said we would talk to each other. No more holding back. The night in the treehouse. Remember?"

"I don't think we should -" Her voice doubled over. There were so may things she wanted to say, and even more she couldn't. "And a lot, a lot has happened since then. You made a decision."

"I was in shock. I didn't think that through. I think we could still make it work. So don't keep saying our hands are tied."

"We both know it won't work. Not like this. Not how it was suppose to." Pepper tried reasoning with him. "Right now you don't have space for me in your life. Maybe we're just not bound to be together."

"You claim it's not in the cards, that fate is pulling you miles away and out of reach from me…" Cautiously he took a step towards her, but she brushed past him.

"Tony -" Pepper tried stopping him, but he didn't let her finish, again.

"You are in my heart. I want you. I don't see why we can't make that work. So who can stop me, if I decide that you're my destiny?" He waited for her to say something, but for a moment Pepper just continued staring at him with big blue eyes full of doubt and hurt. Pepper swallowed, but was at al loss for words. What could she say?

"I can't. Not under these circumstances." She finally blurted out.

"What if there wasn't a baby? What if Emily weren't pregnant? What if we rewrite the stars?" He looked at her intently, not breaking eye contact.

"Just think about it for one second. How would our lives be, if it weren't for the baby? Let's say it doesn't exist and you were made to me mine. Pep, nothing could break or keep us apart. You'd be the one I was meant to find."

"But Tony, you're having a baby with Emily and you two were happy before all of this mess started." It took every ounce of self control to not burst with tears and to keep standing. The words were tearing her apart from the inside out. "Why are you even starting this?" Pepper was pleading now. She backed up as Tony slowly started approaching her again.

Ignoring her question he continued: "But we can change that, can't we? We are responsible for our happiness. There are a lot of parents who are spilt."

"What are you even suggesting?" She asked disbelievingly in return. Her arms were wrapped around her as to protect herself from him, while he came even closer.

"It's up to you and it's up me, not to Emily or Alex, Pep. We decide who we are with. Not them. And not a baby. No one can say what we get to be." As Pepper continued to stare at him wide eyed, he decided to press a little further. "So why don't we rewrite the stars, Pepper? We could change everything. Right here. Right now." His left hand reached for her right, but when his fingers brushed her skin she seemed to wake from her trance and pushed him aside, quickly moving to the other side of the room, over to the other window.

"Tony, you don't get it…" Pepper explained with a sigh.

"Then explain it to me, Pepper." He said softly.

Pepper was quiet for a few minutes, just observing the city in the dusk. She felt panic rising in her chest and her breathing increased, chest heaving.

"We-" Tony started, but this this time it was Pepper interrupting him.

She shook her head slightly and asked, "You think it's easy." She didn't turn towards him, but regret and bitterness riddled her voice. She shook her head in defeat, a sad smile played on her lips as she turned her head and looked at him out of the corner of her eyes.  
"You think I don't want to run to you?" Her big blue eyes shone in the city lights, glistening with tears, just like they had when she had quit on him after finding out about him being Iron Man.  
"That I never think about those nights at the balcony?" She closed her eyes, her heart physically aching "Our kisses?" She was whispering now. "The treehouse?" She turned partly to him now, but kept her arms tight around herself.. "You think I didn't wanted it be just you and me in Texas? That I am not aching to just kiss you senseless right now. That I don't want to be yours?" She finished quietly and looked at the floor. "But every time I think about us now, I also feel like there are mountains separating us, like we are on different sides of doors we just can't walk through."

"And that's what I don't get, Pepper." He took a few fierce steps toward her, but stopped when she flinched ever so slightly. "Why do you feel like this? What is standing between us?"

At is question she fully turned towards him, arms still crossed over her chest.

"I know you're wondering why. But Tony, you always see us when we're alone. We're able to be just you and me, on that balcony, in this treehouse, within these walls. When it's just the two of us. But when we go outside you're not just Tony and I am not just Pepper." Her voice was soft and caring, like she was explaining something to an afraid child, but Tony continued to gaze at her questioningly.

"I am Pepper Potts, CEO and business woman, running a company you're too busy for to run." She looked at him tears welling in her eyes. "Outside, you're Tony Stark, heir of Howard Stark and Stark Industries and more importantly you are Iron Man. A national and international super hero. And to a lot of women you are Tony Stark, full-time playboy and billionaire. To Emily, you are her boyfriend. And to an unborn child, you are a father. You are the father." She fell silent at that. The lump in her throat became bigger with every word as the first tear fell from her eye. "Be honest," She whispered pleadingly. "you would never be able to take a child from its mother. And you would never leave your kid. You are the best man I ever met and I know you never run from your responsibility."

What ever response Tony had on his lips died right there. As always Pepper knew him better than he did himself. Yes he hadn't thought about the consequences of leaving his pregnant girlfriend and his unborn child. All he had focused on was being with Pepper. But she was right. He would never hurt his kid, he wasn't his father. He woke from his trance as Pepper continued to speak.

"That's what I love most about you." She swallowed again, but her voice was shaking when she spoke next. "But I don't see how… There is no intersection here. Our stories don't cross and our stars don't align."

"But Pepper, if we never try, how can you know for sure? Just bear with me for a moment, what if we rewrite - " He asked a little irritated. But she just shook her head at him again and moved to turn back around toward the window. He lurched forward and grabbed her hand, tugging at it slightly to make her face him.

"No one can rewrite the stars, Tony." His little speech from before had hurt her.

"How can you say you'll be mine?" She challenged him. "You're going to be a father."

At this Tony was at a loss for words again. He thought it would be easier. He wanted Pepper. It should have been simple. But his brain had trouble catching up with this realization and partly because he was too damn stubborn to accept this outcome. He. Wanted. Her. And she. Wanted. Him. Easy.  
"But I want you, Pepper. Even before Ems and you damn well know it."

"But you are not mine to have. You belong to your kid. And the kid belongs to its mother. You guys were happy, she makes you happy. She is the first woman, who actually managed to successfully tie you down. As much as I want too, you're not mine to have." Tony was staring so fiercely at her now, she felt her pulse rising and warmth spreading in her entire body against her will.

"That's not true, Pepper. You were the first woman to tie me down. Don't you get it? I am _always _coming _back_ to _you_." He started walking closer to her again and Pepper tried backing up, but her back quickly made contact with the glass window behind her. Her chest heaved a bit, nervousness spreading in her stomach.

"But Tony. Don't you see it? Everything keeps us apart. The universe basically screams at us to not be together. And I'm obviously not the one you were meant to find. But obviously Emily is. So you see, it's not up to you, it's not up to me. There are more people involved here. A lot of people we could hurt. And in the broad face of daylight? There's a real world outside, you know?" She paused and searched his face for a trace of understanding. But there only was determination to be found and it scared and excited her at the same time.

_And we only hurt our selves, if we don't start listening to our hearts._ Her heart seemed to be on Tony's side. Hell why wouldn't it be. She had never ever loved someone as much as Tony Stark. But she knew her heart was acting against better judgement. Yet a small part of her actually wanted her to lose. Desperate to not give in she tried reasoning on.

"Everyone is telling us how to feel and how to be. I… I doubt it really is our decision." She knew she was starting to ramble and get desperate, but she couldn't help it. He was so close again and she could feel the heat radiating off of him. An army of butterflies had been released in her stomach and she had to close her eyes for a brief moment to regain her composure. And she failed miserably. Instead of telling him off like she had anticipated, her mouth - though she suspected, actually it was her heart - betrayed her. "How? Tell me how. How can we rewrite the stars? Maybe the world can be ours. At least for tonight."

His hand grabbed her petite one, which was pressed to the glass panel and squeezed it affectionately. Pepper's other hand was currently trailing up his torso into his black locks. As she started to lean in to him, he saw the lights behind her approaching.

He pulled at her hand and spun her to face the city lights.

"Looks like our way out of here has arrived, Miss Potts." He whispered into her ear.

One of his Iron Man amours had arrived, luring in front of one of the windows. Pepper craned her neck to look at him out of the corner of her eyes. Her eyes were wide with surprise, yet spoke of excitement and lacked fear. "Do you trust me?" Tony asked her and she nodded in response. She'd trust him with her live. "We need to get away from that window."

They went to take cover behind the desk and as Tony lurked over her to shield her with is body from shards that may fly around he couldn't help but notice the way her hand lay on his chest like it always belonged there and the goosebumps all over her bare arms. As soon as the window had been shot open by the suit, Tony stepped into the suit, while Pepper watched it assemble around him with awe and fascination in her eyes. As soon as he was safely encased in his armor she stepped forward without hesitation into his arms, when Tony's face plate went up. "You ready, Miss Potts?" He asked a smug smile on his lips.

"I always wanted to fly with you one day." She admitted and he didn't know if the color on her skin came from the reflection of his armor or if she was actually blushing.

"You're not afraid I'll drop you?" He asked jokingly, but a trace of worry still lay underneath.

She smiled at him warmly, touched by his genuine concern. "I trust you to catch me."

"Ten it'll be my pleasure." He grinned and the faceplate shot down. "What about that smooch for good luck?" He asked teasingly as her arms went around the neck of the suit.  
Pepper just chuckled and hold tight.

The moment they shot out the shattered window and into the night sky was indescribable. It felt like riding a rollercoaster, except that this rollercoaster went through the concrete jungle of New York and lights danced around them, stars, street lights and windows alike. Her stomach tingled and adrenaline flooded her body and brain. The endorphins in her brain send her on a high and she couldn't help but laugh and squeal in delight. Flying with him felt like nothing she had ever experienced. Never had she felt more secure and free at the same time and never had she understood him better. For the first time in over three weeks she felt pure joy. A feeling she had last felt in Texas and hadn't thought she was capable of feeling ever again. Yes, she had always wanted to fly with him. But she discovered there was no-one she would rather fall with. Because he would always catch her.

And with the joy came a sense of clarity. Maybe everything she thought was impossible, was possible after all.

If it weren't for the baby they would be together already. Heck, they could have been together for month, if Pepper hadn't been so chickened out by her own feelings. And for a split second Pepper knew with all of her heart they could make it, they belonged together and that her and Tony were meant for each other. Since they had first lain yes on each other, they had naturally been drawn towards each other. Pepper had never denied they had chemistry, but she had always denied it meant more than just being able to work well together. But now, she felt like it had been more than just fait, that they had met each other that night in the Stark Industries workshop. She felt like they were really made for each other, like they were meant to find each other. Maybe it really lay in their hands. Though worlds were separating them right now, maybe they still could decide about their own fait. Maybe they really could rewrite the stars and change the worlds design to make it their own.

After about ten minutes they landed on the pavement in front of Tony's pent house apartment in midtown Manhattan, Tony had taken the scenery route. The adrenaline was still rushing through Pepper's veins and she couldn't help the smile that spread over her face, as she kept on holding on to him. She was abut to lean in when reality came crashing back down onto her.

"Sir, Miss Mansen is calling. It seems like she is in distress." JARVIS voice pierced through their moment.

He closed his eyes in defeat "I'm sorry." He whispered before turning his head away from their kiss, but he didn't let her go.

"It appears she is on her way to the hospital, Sir." JARVIS announced again.

"Is it something with the baby?" Tony asked, suddenly afraid.

"I have no information about her condition. But she seemed to experience pain." JARVIS informed him.

"Tell her I'll be on my way in a minute." Tony answered JARVIS and turned his attention back to the woman in his arms. Her arms had left his shoulders and she merely stood stiff in his embrace.  
"Pep." Tony sighed heavily against her temple, he was hurt, but Peppers heart lay in pieces on the ground before them.

„I'm sorry. I have to go. But please, think about it." He pleaded with her.

Never had she wanted to be more selfish in her life than now. But she knew he needed to go. Emily needed him and the baby maybe even more. And they would continue to need him. They would always come first in his world. „I don't need to think about it, Tony." She said, sadness, no remorse heavy in her voice. „I know you'll be a great father." She even managed a weak smile. "You will always put your child first. And because of that I know you'll never do anything that would hurt the baby or its mother. Especially when you still have the tiniest bit of feelings left for her. And that's ok." For her it was anything but, but she just couldn't be selfish. Not when he wanted to do the right thing.

„Pep, please." His voice was quiet, but he didn't talk back so Pepper knew she was right. "I am sorry." he repeated, like it was the most obvious thing in the world and Peppers heart broke even more.

Her fingers framed his face, before she spoke the words he had longed to hear for so long. „I love you." She looked up at him and a single tear rolled down her cheek.

„No, no don't cry." he pleaded with her and his armor clad hand caught the tear carefully. „We can... We will figure this out." he tried to reason before JARVIS chimed in again.

"Sir, Miss Mansen is calling again. She's in the hospital now. I recommend you hurry."

"Pep-" He started again, but she stopped him.

"Go get em, boss." She tried and failed miserably to sound cheerful, while tears continued to roll down her cheeks. Without thinking she stepped forward and kissed him with all of her heart. Oddly enough it felt like good bye.

As soon as she broke the kiss she stepped away, turned around and started to walk away, flinging her arms around herself to protect herself from breaking apart.

The swoosh and stream of air told her he was gone without another word. All she could see was the ever smaller getting light from his thrusters vanishing into the darkness.

Her tears were flowing freely now.

"You know I want you, it's not a secret I try to hide. But I can't have you, we're bound to break and my hands are tied."

* * *

***Fingers crossed* don't hate me, don't hate me, don't hate me**

**I promise we now have officially hit rock bottom. And the next chapter is going to turn everything around.  
****Here comes your sneak peak: **

So Pepper Potts wasn't hurt, not this time. She was determined. He had fought tooth and nail for her over last months, now it was her turn fighting for him. For them.

**See we're nearing a happy ending! **

**Leave a little love (:**


	29. Honey, I'm Good

**Chapter 29: Honey I'm good**

**Hello everyone,**

**thanks for all of you sticking with me this far and for your nice and amazing reviews. ****  
****One asked whether this will be the last chapter, it's not. But we're close to the end as this is the first chapter of Phase 5. ****  
****I also haven't written out the following chapters, because of this whole pandemic situation is getting to me and I focused on my new FF, because it's lighter and a bit comedic, so it might take a little while until I update here. I'm sorry I cant give you a definite time, but my schedule is so messy right now... Please don't be mad, I'll keep you posted.**

**Also I'm glad everyone is looking forward to the new FF I have in mind and the first two chapters are already written out. I will publish the first chapter within the next two weeks, so keep an eye open. It's called: _I wanna know you_.**

**Now, let's get to the Pepperony, shall we?**

**Song: Honey I'm good by Andy Grammer**

* * *

**Honey I'm good**

After Pepper got debriefed by the police she went straight back to her hotel. After spending a whole day with Tony and especially after their conversation she felt drained. Emotionally and physically. Her tears had long run dry. Not because she wasn't sad anymore, no her heart still lay in pieces scattered all over New York City, but because she simply had shed too many tears over him already. It seemed like her body refused to continue producing tears over that subject. All she wanted to do was stare at ceiling while drowning in self-pity and let the world crumble around her to ashes.

Unfortunately luck wasn't on her side. She hadn't notice the buzzing of her phone while she had been sitting in the cab. She had been too absorbed in the streetlights that painted pictures on the droplets the starting rain had caused on her window. Though she had't really payed attention to them. The red and golden lights had sent her mind spiraling back to the feeling of his armor clad arms holding her carefully while they shot through the sky. God she was a screwed up person. She had been in love with her boss for years, but had been too scared to admit it and refused him time after time, when he tried to make more of their growing attraction toward each other. Finally he got tired of her antics and got himself a girlfriend. Ok granted she herself had picked up a guy herself, a guy who seemed to genuine love her and even wanted to marry her, and whom she discovered she had absolutely no romantically feelings for what's so ever. And when she and the guy she really loved finally admitted how they felt toward each other he got his girlfriend pregnant and asked her to engage in an affair with him. Chaos.  
No, over those thoughts she hadn't noticed the constant buzzing of her phone in her handbag, hooked up to the power bank inside.

When Pepper arrived at the lobby of her hotel and looked for her ID to retrieve her key card from the concierge her phone started buzzing again. The caller ID showed it was Alex and her eyebrows furrowed in wonder. They hadn't spoken since the proposal and her refusal. Why the hell was he calling her now? With a sigh she answered her phone. "Yes?" She was just too over this day to really bother with niceties.

"Pepper?" His voice sounded stressed and tired. "We tried reaching you for two hours now. Where the hell are you two?"

"I… We…" Pepper stuttered, trying to comprehend what he was saying. "Tony disappeared about four hours ago. JARVIS said Emily had to go to the hospital."

"Yeah, well he never showed up." Alex spit into the phone.

"Maybe he is still on his way?" Pepper said defensively. She knew Alex was mad at her for rejecting his proposal and he had every right to be, but she was hurting as well and being attacked like this didn't help the aching and the guilt she felt toward him at all.  
"I don't know. Maybe JARVIS knows-"

He interrupted her again, "JARVIS" he stressed the word. "says he never left New York City. If you find him, tell him he should hurry. Emily is saying she doesn't want him here, but in my opinion really needs him." His voice was stern and cold while leaving no room for discussion.

"Okay." She simply said, at a loss for words. "May I ask… Are you with Emily?" She hated the fact that Tony was expecting a child with another woman, with any woman that wasn't her, but she really was concerned for her wellbeing and for his kid.

"Yes, I am in the hospital. So is Lisa. But they won't tell me anything. Lisa had been in with her before, but she won't tell me anything either. She's Emily's and Tony's PR lawyer, as you know and she tries handling the press. Just try to find Tony and send him over here a.s.a.p." The connection went dead without him waiting for her response.

As Pepper tried calling Tony she was greeted with a dead line wasn't able to tell her his position either. The suit was at his penthouse, but the AI told her Mr Stark had left the building again twenty minutes after his appearance and left his phone behind as well.

"JARVIS, do you know what happened to Emily?" She asked the AI, still worried for them and in hope to maybe find out more about Tinies whereabouts.

"Miss Manson's vital readings suggested she was suddenly in a lot of pain since her blood pressure was high and heart rate elevated rapidly. As for the condition of her child I have no information, as it was still too early into the pregnancy to monitor a heartbeat. Would you like me to hack into the hospital database to find out more of her current symptoms and diagnosis, Miss Potts?"

"No, JARVIS. That won't be necessary, thank you. Please monitor the news for a trace of Tony and report back to me as soon as you get note from him." Pepper hung op on the AI and scrolled through the latest google news of Tony or Iron Man, but the last recent thing was an article about their negotiations with JP International.  
Pepper had no idea why Tony hadn't flown back to California when his girlfriend and probably his child were in jeopardy, but she had no time to ponder the question before her phone chimed again. This time it was her oldest friend.

"Lisa! I already talked to Alex. I have no idea where Tony is, he left me four hours ago on his way back to California. I don't know why he didn't- God I hope Emily is alright and the baby as -"

For the third time that night she was interrupted. "Pepper, there is no baby." Her voice was calm, yet a little sad.

Pepper stopped her pacing abruptly and clutched the phone tighter to her ear. She hated herself for it, but she couldnd't help the small spark of hope started to involuntarily kindle in her. "Come again." She said breathlessly.

"There is no baby, Pepper." Lisa say again.

"Oh no. Did she lose it?" In a matter of seconds her mind rushed to all emotions a human could possible feel. Pepper felt horror wash over her. Yes she had wished there was no such obstacle between her and her own happiness, she had loathed her pregnancy even, but never in a hundred years had she wished for them to lose their child. And what made it even worse that after her initial thought: _Oh my god_ her second thought had been: _Oh my god!_ in a far happier tone.

"Not exactly. There never was a baby." Lisa concluded carefully. "Emily was never pregnant. She's sad and angry at the world, but physically fine. She talked to Tony before and insists she doesn't want him here. Her mother came in half an hour ago."

"But how? What happened? And… and the test?" Questions exploded in her head like fireworks. "I thought they consulted with the OBGYN?"

* * *

Tony had just left the New York City area when he had asked JAVIS to dial Emily's number for him. It took a few rings before she finally answered.

"Emily!" He exclaimed without letting her get further than the first two syllables of her name. "I am on my way back, now. JARVIS says ETA is about two and a half hours. Are you alright? Is the baby alright?"

"Tony, you don't have to come here. I'm alright." her voice was tired and had an edge to it.

"And the baby? Is it alright?" He made his thrusters go a little harder, making him fly faster. "What happened?"

"I never was pregnant." Her voice hadn't sounded detached or emotionless, granted she hadn't been her usual bubbly self, but for someone who had just delivered such news, she sounded relatively normal.

"What?" Tony was confused. He had seen the sticks laying on his bathroom counter and has accompanied her to her doctor. "But the two blue lines? And the blood tests said so as well?"

There was a sigh on the other side of the line. Her voice was cracking as she spoke next. "It was just a cyst that caused the beta HCG levels in my blood and urine to rise. It's nothing major and I will be discharged in an hour. My mom is on her way here as well and I will be staying with her tonight. So you really don't need to come home." She rattled the informations down, like she was reading them from a newspaper. Clearly she wasn't as collected as she was letting on.

"Emily, I am coming home. I don't want you to go through this alone." He had said sternly, feigning there was no room for discussions.

"Tony," she had weakly, her voice slightly shaking. "please don't come home."

"You just lost a baby, of course I'm coming home." He argued back sternly.

"First of all, I didn't really lose a baby, because there wasn't one to lose in the first place." She spat at him now and for the first time during their conversation she really showed how sad and angry she felt.

"Look Ems," He started softly, he didn't want her to upset her further in this situation. "I know you have gone through an emotional rollercoaster the last few hours. I can't even imagine what it must have been like for you with me gone and that's exactly why I don't think you should go through this alone. I am coming home, no discussions." He had instructed JARVIS to put even more power into his thrusters to make him fly even faster.

There was a silence on Emily's part and Tony had figured he had won their argument, until she spoke again with heavy emotion in her voice. "Please stay in New York, Tony." Her voice was breaking now with every word. "I... I really don't want to see you. When you are here it will only remind me of what I lost."

He had stopped mid air and hovered somewhere over Pittsburg. "What you lost? I lost this kid as well… I-" But he stopped himself, now was not the time to fight with her about this. And to be honest he understood. Seing him would remind her of what they lost and what they could have had. While it had maybe scared the crap out of Tony, it sure had been exciting for her to become a parent. "What does that mean? For us?" He asked instead.

"I don't know. Tony, please." Her voice was barely a whisper now and she was obviously crying. "I just ask you for some space. Until I realize what had happened really." Her voice stabilized with every word. She sounded mostly tired now. That was such an amazing characteristic about her, she seldom was whining. And Tony knew that she really didn't need him. Maybe she never had needed him. Either way he couldn't be of benefit for her tonight and she had actively asked him to stay away thrice.

"Take the mansion. You and your mom will be more comfortable there." Emily had thanked him briefly and hung up on him.

He hovered in the air a little longer, not sure what to make of this situation now. He hadn't felt so alone in a long time. He had no kid to raise, it looked like he had no girlfriend anymore and Pepper had given up on them, she probably had a long time ago, given how easy it had been for her to let him go tonight. On the other hand a small part of him was happy, he wouldn't have to raise a kid with a woman he wasn't in love with. He knew not much about family, but he firmly believed his parents loved each other and that that would be the best and only valid foundation to built a family on.

The longer he thought about it, he felt really sorry for Emily. He couldn't imagine what it must be like for her and the more he thought about it the more he understood why she really didn't want to see him.

Since he couldn't return to his home tonight he decided to stay in New York and turned around heading back to the city.  
He considered calling Pepper briefly, but the way she had looked at him made him refrain. And to be honest, at the moment all he wanted was a drink and to be alone. After all he had just lost his kid as well.

* * *

She found him in the third bar she tried, with some help of JARVIS and a slightly illegal look into the NYPD public camera footage database. He was dressed in black jeans and a lightly colored dress shirt, his sleeves rolled up.  
As she spotted him at the otherside of the room, sitting at the bar she suddenly wasn't sure what to say to him anymore. Was he sad? Did he still want to be in a relationship with her? Was he still in a relationship with Emily? Was their bond now even stronger?

The place was more of a club than it was a bar, but it was definitely the type of establishment he preferred. The Moxy was relatively new in New York, it was a hotel with a rooftop bar, a playboy bunny themed mini golf course and an other bar completely dedicated to gin. It was new, it was hip and it definitely attracted bombshells. Speaking of bombshells there was a blond, busty bombshell currently standing next to him, running her fingers through his hair. His arm was lazily swung around her hip and her heart stung for a second.

Apparently his relationship with Emily was over, given that he was here with another random girl in a bar, probably drunk, flirting away like in the old days.  
His face came close to the girls face and he kissed her on the cheek sloppily.

The green monster Pepper had encountered within her pearlier this month returned with full forth, screaming at her and demanding to pull this hoe from his side and drag her out by her long, blonde, fake hair. But she wasn't the infamous Pepper Potts for a reason and she hadn't became one of the most respected business women by going all fight club on Tony's… companions.  
No, she was more demure than that. And she knew she had a big advantage over those girls. Tony loved her. Or had loved her? That was to be determined now. After everything they went through did she really still have a chance with him?  
Well she sure as hell would make sure that none of the girls in here had a chance with him, especially blondy over there.

In the past Pepper would have stopped herself from further harm at this point, would have carefully retreated and rebuilt her walls and went back to being his ever loyal PA. The one to never make a move, never ask questions and never listen to her own heart, too afraid to get hurt even worse. But Pepper Potts wasn't hurt, not this time. She was determined. He had fought tooth and nail for her over last months, now it was her turn fighting for him. For them.

She walked over to them, where they sat at the bar. Making her way through the crowd was surprisingly easy. A death glare and determination written all over her face could work wonders, except for a small encounter with an over confident bloke who though "Smile, red hot chili Pepper" was a good pick up line.

His eyes snapped to hers and she instantly knew that he knew what had happened to him and Emily. His eyes were nearly glazing over with questions and doubt, but also with a sense of defeat. It broke her heart and she knew she only had one chance to make this right. "Let's go outside and talk."

"Uhm, excuse you? Who the fuck do you think you are?" The blonde girl asked her and straightened herself before her to her full height. Pepper, still in her work attire and her signature heels was about two inches taller than her and looked down at her coldly. "Look ginger girl, get out of here, nobody likes vampires. And besides he's Tony Stark if you didn't know that, which I guess you don't. He would never leave with such a Plain Jane like you are. He's way out of you league."

Pepper had had a few of these conversations over the years with the girls Tony had brought home in the past. Though she had always remained cool and hard on the outside, some times their words had really affected her. Especially Christine Everhard had hit home once with her comment about Pepper still taking out his trash after all those years, insinuating she was nothing more than a glorified housemaid to him. If she had been asked she'd always deny it, but one time or another she had locked herself in the bathroom and had needed to fix her makeup before coming out again. Over the years her coat had gotten thicker and the way he was still looking at her right now, like she was a solar flare amongst a black hole mad her even more sure about it all.

Without even granting so much as a glance she pushed the bombshell aside and and cradled Tony's head in her hands. Not as a lover but as his friend and he accepted her comfort without any hesitation and lay his head against her sternum.

"Let's get out of here." She spoke to him again, softly. Until this moment he hadn't known how badly he had craved her company. Her comfort. The moment his forehead met her skin he felt a sense of home wash over him and the urge to get out of this noisy environment.

Without hesitation he nodded and followed her, not even batting one more eyelash at the girl. Luckily there was always some place in midtown Manhattan that sold cheap beer at around midnight and so they strolled through the streets toward Byrant Park with two bottles of beer in brown paper bags. They found a secluded corner on the far end farthest from the public library and sat down on a bench. The whole time since they had left the bar neither had spoken a word, Tony still too absorbed in his own thoughts and Pepper wanting to offer silent comfort, waiting for him to be ready to talk about it. Yet what was driving her crazy, she wanted to touch him so badly, to take all his pain and sorrow, but she feared as soon as she'd touch him he would crumble to pieces beneath her hands.

"You know, in a few month there will be a Stark Tower over there." He pointed toward the library and the area behind it with the brown paper bag.

"Yeah, if we still get that deal with JP…" Pepper said and ripped at her own paper bag.

"Oh, we closed that deal today." He informed her, with a side glance. Peppers head shot up and looked at him astounded. "_You_ closed that deal." He said awe underlining his voice.

"But the meeting barely lasted ten minutes. Then the code black-"

"Pep, you're a business genius. Haven't I told you?" He looked at her and smiled knowingly before taking a swift swig from is bottle. "They called when I was on my way back to the city, saying you convinced them."

"But I only spoke for like ten minutes." Pepper repeated not really able to fathom it.

"They said the way you hold yourself during the crisis and your passion for the project were their clues as to the credibility. At first they thought the building would be a publicity stunt for Stark Industries and nothing more, but I guess you really showed them this is your baby." His smile dropped as he realized his last words and he looked back onto his bottle in his hands, which he had taken out of the bag somewhere along his speech, consequences be damnd.

She wasn't sure if his silence spoke more then words ever could or if it was a silent question for her to please free him from his agony and be the one to start the conversation they both knew he needed to have eventually. So Pepper didn't respond. She didn't know what to say and she knew they were beating around the bush, but she didn't want to push him, either.  
After a while though the silence became overwhelming and Pepper couldn't take it any longer. "Are you sad?" She asked, observing him out of the corner of er eye.

"Am I sad?" He asked a little bitter, but not spiteful. "Am I sad that I don't have to raise a child with Emily? No, not really." A silence followed his words, before he realized how bad that had sounded. "I am sorry for her though. No-one should make such an experience. I can't even imagine how she feels." He took another sip and shuffled his feet over the sand on the ground. "Am I sad that I won't have a kid? I don't know." He sighed and fell silent again for a few minutes. Before he spoke next he looked up and at her. She turned her head toward him and hold his gaze. "I never really thought about having kids before. I never thought I'd come to a point in my life where I'd really consider starting a family with some one." He sounded a bit sad and almost vulnerable. He hadn't dubbed himself worthy of such a treasure. "But I believe the best way to built a family is with a woman you love, and not with someone you want to make someone else jealous with and when it practically was an accident. But on the other hand…" He trailed off, not sure how to put in words what he was feeling.

Luckily Pepper knew him inside and out and was there to finish his sentences. "On the other hand you already started loving him or her."

His lip quirked and he looked back at the Public Library in the distance. "Yeah, in a kind of weird, abstract way. I don't know, it's stupid." He shrugged and looked back on the floor.

He felt Pepper taking his hand and squeeze it. "It's not stupid, Tony. It's human." He looked at her and she smiled in return and her smile made him melt inside, made the sadness melt away. Maybe he still had a chance for of all of this, with the right woman, a woman he loved. And a woman who loved him.  
His smile widened in awe as he realized she had actually told him tonight. She had set him free, had said good bye to him, but she had told him she loved him.

The lanterns which were scattered around Byrant Park illuminated them in a golden light, there were sirens heard in the distance and a wave of buzzing noise wavered their way from the ever busy Times Square two blocks away. A few strands had come loose from her bun and framed her face, catching the light and looking even more fiery golden. The way she was still looking at him, like he was the only real human in the world beside her, like he was a miracle of its own, along with the sureness, all doubt and fear gone from her eyes made his hear beat faster, stronger. He himself was sure about a fact now, he had only ever suspected before: His heart was beating for her, because of her.

If he had wanted kiss her so many times before, on the balcony in a blue, backless dress, before a press conference, down in his workshop when he had made her CEO, in his old office while she talked him down again, rightfully though, at another charity at another balcony, in a hayloft and in a treehouse, compared to those wanting moments, this was an entirely new league. The need to kiss her was vital, a yearning as old as mankind itself. But he wasn't sure if he was allowed to do so just now, so he chuckled a little embarrassed .

"You have no idea, how badly I want to kiss you right now." He answered the silent question her eyes asked him.

Without saying anything she put down the bottle and paper bag next to her on the bench and stood before him. This time it was his turn to look at her questioningly, but she just cradled his face in her hand, like she had back at the bar. Only this time he didn't lean his head against her sternum, but looked up into her blue oceans she called eyes. She smiled down promising at him, a twinkle sparkling in her eye as she leaned down toward him.  
Their lips met carefully, like two teenagers, experiencing love for the first time, but as soon as her hand wandered from his jaw around to the nape of his neck his own brain shut down and his body kicked into action.

She really was testing the waters here. She wanted to be with Tony, a slot had opened for her and she was making damn well sure to not miss it again. But she wanted and needed to give him the space he needed. Yet when he told her wanted to kiss her, all rational thought went out the window. She had hold them back enough already and couldn't ignore the monster in her stomach any longer to claim him as her own.

The first kiss was soft, careful. She was almost afraid she would break their new bond by going too fast, break him, but the moment she felt Tony kissing her back, she couldn't contain herself any longer. For too long had she hold herself back, for too long had she denied their feeling, for too long had she never fought for him and for them. And now it was up to her to show him she wanted this as bad, if not more than he did.

The urge to touch him was overwhelming and she simply let go. Consequences be damned. Her hand traveled to his neck, his soft locks gliding through her fingers when she felt his arm trailing around her waist, pulling her down onto his lap so she was straddling him. She didn't mind that her pencil skirt hiked up on her thighs. It was only dimly lit and there were very few people around. Luckily they had also picked a secluded corner for themselves. She laughed into the kiss in surprise but was soon silenced by his tongue begging for entrance into her mouth while her other hand joined the other one in his thick hair.

Tony was holding her so carefully, yet possessively it made her shiver with certainty and anticipation. Unconciously she started grinding against him and when she felt the effects of her movements clearly pressing into her she couldn't help the moan escaping her throat.

A police car, that rushed past Byrant Park made her snap back into the here and now and she remembered if they continued this here, they might be facing a charge for indecent behavior in public. She had trouble bringing distance between herself and Tony, because every time she tried pulling back he groaned in frustration and pulled her right back to him. Funny enough she wasn't really able to resist him and gave in for a second. Every. Single. Time.

Finally she managed, chuckling to get a few words in. "I think we should continue this somewhere else."

That caught his attention immediately and he looked up at her with an astounded look on his face and was met with a wicked smirk and a distinct, slow nod from Pepper. He looked so damn cute and hot at the same time. He was looking at her like a boy on Christmas morning, being greeted with a new bike, but his messed up black hair, his slightly crumpled dress shirt and his definitely swollen lips made him look so delicious.

"My place?" He asked and stood a little uncomfortable in his jeans, but still grabbed her hand possessively.

"Actually, my hotel is just around the corner." Pepper said, before stepping up to him again and kissing him longingly.

* * *

**I think we all know what the next chapter is going to be.  
****So there is no actual sneak peak, just a line from the song that was the inspiration for the outline.**

"Stop moving your lips and kiss me"

**Leave a little love.**


	30. Speechless

**Chapter 30: Speechless **

**News flash: I'm not dead. Yet. Though my law instructor tried to burry me under masses and loads of paperwork as well as essays and practical training. It's super stressful, but I learned a lot since may and next week I get the chance to test out in a real case how it feels like to be a real judge one day. I get to lead a real trial and I am so excited and a bit nervous. So the hard work paid off.**

**The downside is I neglected you wonderful people, who reviewed relentlessly, horribly and I can't tell you how sorry I am about not updating. I read every single review and tried my best in moving the story along, but most of the time I was too stressed or too tired fo function outside of work and school. Also with Corona going on it just became too much for me.**

**But I completed this chapter and we're almost done. Only one chapter left to go on this story, and I try to get this one out faster, but I can't and won't make promises. **

**Once this FF is completed, I will move I wanna know you along, whenever I have the time. The plot is laid out in my note book, I just need the time to write it all out. **

**I sincerely hope you can forgive me for posting this so late, but I hope you enjoy it anyway. Let's finally go, shall we?**

**Song: Speechless by Rachel Platten**

* * *

**Speechless**

Though the hotel was only two blocks away from Byrant Park it took Tony and Pepper nearly an hour to make it there. They stopped at every other street lamp because Tony couldn't keep his eyes off her under the golden lights the lamps cast on her. It was even more difficult for him to not give in every time and just kiss her, until he remembered he could actually do just that, without her holding him back really.

When they finally reached the block with their hotel Pepper trapped him by his lapel and tucked him into an unlit corner of a house entrance, only a few doors from the hotel entrance. Tony looked at her quizzically, and she just smiled at him shyly, eyes cast down a little and she bit her lip, in an effort to try and hide her smile. She was nervous and Tony started to worry a little.

"Pep?" Her eyes shot up to his, but he couldn't read them in the dim lights. "Ar-" But before he could ask anything he felt her lips on his again, while her right hand duck in his hair, as her left cradled his neck. She kissed him, once, twice, each time sweeter and with more passion than before. When she pulled back he linked his hands at the small of her back, while hers rested behind his neck. "Are you alright?" He asked her softly and gazed down at her.

Pepper nodded, she gave up and finally smiled at him openly. "I just don't want the whole world to know about us." She stopped and bit her lip again, afraid to say the wrong thing. "At least not tonight." There was more she wanted to tell him, but she didn't know how to say what she wanted to say, without ruining everything. Yet she knew there were still things left unspoken, undiscussed between them, which they needed to address soon. But she didn't want him to think she was backing out again, doubting them.

Tony could see worry and confusion running over her face, as well as the nervousness that was eating on her, before she started laughing despite herself and leaned back against the brick wall behind her and shut her eyes for a brief second. She was afraid to come off across the wrong way, and these were probably one of the most important minutes for their future and she felt like she was wrangling with the monster inside her. She knew she wanted him, with every fibre of her being, but she needed them to just be them tonight without the perspective of facing a crowd of reporters the next morning and without the perspective of the hazard they were going to cause back home. The press would go crazy when they were to be seen heading into a hotel together and it would only take them a few minutes to bribe the concierge into confirming they were sharing one room. Yes the press would go crazy over them. Especially since neither of them had broken up officially with their respective partner.

Tony was studying her face carefully and thank god he could read her like a book. The small changes in her face and behind her eyes gave away that she wasn't afraid of him or them. She was afraid of breaking what they now had when morning came. And to be honest he couldn't really blame her. He had no idea what he and Emily were at the moment. He could only speculate… Wait? Pepper must be single, right?  
They had mainly talked about him and Emily and the non-existing baby. If she was still with Alex why would she have come to him? Why would she have kissed him?  
But even if she was single, he had no idea where he and Emily stood currently. To him it was a no-brainer that their relationship was over. Hell, it had been over since Texas if it hadn't been for the baby. But either way, single or not, neither Emily nor Alex deserved to figure out about their "affair" this way.

Lost in his own thoughts he hadn't noticed Pepper had started staring at him and her eyebrows furrowed at his concerned and pained expression, before her eyes widened in fear. "Tony?" Her voice was small and crackled at the edges. And he looked at her and realized immediately what she was thinking."Maybe we-"

He cut her off and kissed her, while he pushed her against the brick wall behind her and lay all his love and feelings for her into the kiss. He needed to chase away her fear, and his for the matter. He knew she was afraid about that he was going to back out again. After he pulled away he kept his arms on the left and right side of her head, trapping her between himself and the wall. "I get it." He told gazing into her eyes intensively, willing her to understand. And she did. "Why don't you go to your room?" He asked her and a smirk lit up his face. Had anyone told him, he would be saying this words to Pepper anytime in his life, especially those last two weeks he would have laughed at their faces. "I'll follow you in a few minutes."

Pepper nodded slowly at him, but didn't find the strength to push away from him and step out of his embrace. Instead she closed her eyes and kissed him again again, relishing in the feeling of her lips against his. "You know, if I should follow you, you actually need to go at some point." Tony teased her and kissed her again briefly.

Pepper stuck her young out at him in mock annoyance and pushed him away a little. "See you in a few, I guess." She cooed and started to walk away, but Tony grabbed her arm and pulled her back for another kiss, though he didn't trap her against the wall again. "You know," She threw his own words back at him. "if we want to meet inside, you actually need to let me leave at one point." She smirked at him smugly. She enjoyed having so much power over him and being the center of his attention, she loved that she had the power to turn him into a love sick puppy and that she was able to make him reluctant of letting her go.

"I need the room number." Tony said huskily while his eyes drilled into hers and they held hunger, passion and lust, but also devotion, trust and love.

"2609." Pepper told him and brushed her fingers through his hair lovingly, excited what else the night would bring for them. "See you in a few." Nervousness pooled in the pit of her stomach as she spoke the words, but she was finally able to pull away and walk inside, though not without pressing another promising kiss to his lips.

Pepper entered the reception-hall of "The Langham" hotel on fifth avenue after taking a deep breath. She immediately felt like all eyes were on her, although she knew it was ridiculous. There were barley any staff around, except for two people at the reception, who weren't even looking at her, but at their desktops, another staff member was serving a drink to one of the two guests sitting near the entrance. No one was looking at her, at all. But she felt like, if anyone would as much as glance at her, they would know immediately that she had just had a rather heated make out session and was about to take it even a step further. God she felt the flush already creeping up her neck again.  
She took another deep breath before stepping up to the reception desk and cleared her throat politely to make herself known.  
_Oh god she knows_. Pepper immediately thought as the brunette turned to her and smiled politely.

"How can I help you, Miss?" The receptionist - Laurel read her name tag - asked and showed her white, pearly teeth.

_Oh god, she knows everything._ Shot through Pepper's head again. "I-" The word left her throat in a high pitched squeal. _Get it together, Pepper. There is no way she knows. And if she does its non of her business._ She cleared her throat again and started again. "I need my key, please. Room 2609." Pepper handed her ID to the receptionist and smiled her most professional smile waiting for the keycard.

The elevator was somewhere between the seventh floor and ninth floorWhen Pepper dared to breath again. She had her back against the back wall, eyes closed and trying to calm her breath, when reality caught up to her and she realized what the day had bought her. A mix between a gasp and a laugh escaped her throat and a grin so wide her cheeks hurt spread over her face. Only two weeks ago her world had crumbled to pieces when Tony had told her Lisa was apparently pregnant. Not even 12 hours ago had she let Tony go. And up until less than ten minutes ago had her whole world turned over and over again. And in about an hour… Well, in about an hour she'd probably be not even on this earth anymore, figuratively speaking. Pepper felt herself smile even wider in giddy anticipation again and her cheeks got hot once more.

When she reached her room she entered it and looked around her Empire State Penthouse Suite. It was impeccable. Impeccable except for her bedroom. Her suitcase was open, clothes were spilled over the floor, her very not sexy grayish and stained night shirt lay crumpled on her bed and worn undergarments lay forgotten in front of the wardrobe. Yep, this was not the environment she wanted to be with Tony, but she felt like their first time actually being together should not be on the couch. Well at least they should have the possibility to use the bedroom at one point.  
God, why was she planning this so much. Maybe she was really overthinking this too much. Maybe she had even misread his body language and signs and he wasn't even interested in her sexually?  
_Nonono_. She was not going to ruin this by overthinking, she was going to take it one step at a time and see where this night was headed for them. That was if Tony was actually coming. _Ugh. Stop it Pepper._

She shook her head and started throwing her underwear and night shirt into her suitcase. On her way to to the wardrobe to hide the suitcase she passed her mirror and noticed just how crumpled and wrinkled her blouse and skirt were.

A smile crept up her face as she remembered the cause and then it was back, the certainty was back, that she had actually won him. That they were finally where they had always meant to be. Together.

It was then that she noticed the beer stain on her blouse and decided to change quickly into something more… exciting before Tony arrived. She had her blouse halfway unbuttoned when there was a knock on her door.

"Damn, damn, damn." Pepper muttered under her breath. Her blouse was half way opened, but she hadn't even pulled anything in exchange out. Hasty she buttoned up her blouse and rushed to the door. "Coming!" She shouted and all but ran to get the door.

Tony stood on the other side, casually leaned against the frame, arms crossed over his jacket smiling smugly. "What took you so long, Miss Potts. I was almost afraid you'd leave me here."

"No, sorry. The suite is enormous and it takes a while to get to the door." She said awkwardly, feeling the nervousness again now that he was here.

"Are you gonna let me in now?" Tony asked and placed his hand lightly on her waist.

"Oh yes. Sorry. Sure." God she felt like a teenager all over again, why was she so nervous. "Do… Do you want something to drink? I have a bar and" She walked over to the bar and opened the fridge looking inside, but she couldn't concentrate long enough to focus on anything inside. "… stuff." His eyes were trying to catch hers and his smile made her weak in the knees. All coherent thoughts seemed to have left her brain and she wasn't able to form complete sentences.  
He only smiled at her, though. A warm and honest smile, one of his rare ones he only reserved for special people. For her. Somehow it made her even more weak in the knees and she nocked over a glass on the tray in an attempt to grab one.  
"What? What is it?" She asked as he kept staring at her, a bemused look on his face and a nervous laughter escaped her lips.

Tony placed his jacket over the back of the couch before he walked over to where she stood. He placed his hands on her waist, his new favorite place in this world it seemed. He crooked his head again and looked intently into her eyes, while his smile widened a bit further.

"Wha-at?" Pepper asked again, not even sure what she was asking about anymore, but her smile reflected his as her eyes continued jumping between his eyes and plump lips.

"You got a few buttons wrong." He stated while looking down at her blouse, which was in disarray. He loved that she was so flustered because of him. It was a total change to her normal cool and being-in-charge demeanor. Her eyes went wide and she looked down. Indeed her second top button hole housed the top button, while the third button was still completely undone.

"Oh." She breathed out and started fumbling around to rearrange the mess she had created until Tony's hands stopped her.

"You are beautiful, Pep." He said softly and when she looked up, his smile was gone. It was replaced with a look of pure adoration and love. She held her hands in place with his above hers. "Nervous?" He asked and looked intensely at her again.

"Yes," Pepper breathed out and smiled awkwardly. "a little."

Tony smile widened and his hands left hers and settled on her waist again "Good, me too. I think we could both use a drink. Let's take it one step at a time." Pepper looked up at him with big eyes, a little confusion mingled in her glance.

"I thought -" But he interrupted her, letting go of her while taking the glass Pepper had knocked over and another one from the tray.

"I know. But I want to make one thing very clear," he turned toward her, now two glasses with golden liquor in hand and handed one glass to her. "I came here with no expectations. We're doing it at your pace. What ever you're comfortable with. If something happens tonight, good, great even. If we're only talking all night, that's fine with me, too. I just want us to be together tonight."

His words made her melt inside and she smiled at him, touched by his exclamation. And then she realized she wanted to kiss him and now she simply could do it, so she did. It was sweet and their lips remained closed, but both of them enjoyed the simple moment together, Pepper now with on hand on the counter, the other at his wrist, while Tony was still holding both glasses. When Pepper pulled back she took one glass from him and slandered over to the white Italian leather couch, which gave a spectacular view over the city.

Tony flopped down next to her, but angled his body toward her while placing one arm over the back rest of the couch, not quite putting his arm around her, but still within reach.

They sat in comfortable silence looking over at the other one occasionally and grinning at each other like two awkward teenagers when their eyes would meet.

After a while though the silence got a little uncomfortable for Pepper. She just wanted to be with him and let go, but she knew they needed to talk first. No more secrets, no more hiding things which needed to be said and nothing to stand between them. But the silence got louder every second and heavier with everything that still was unspoken between them. She was afraid how he would react to the things she had to tell him, but she was even more afraid he would feel betrayed if she comes clean after… well after taking things a step further.

Tony seemed to sense her discomfort and she felt his hand brush her shoulder so she looked at him again. He offered a sympathetic smile. "What is it?" He asked, but before she could answer he continued with a joke, trying to be his usual smug and cocky self, though there was the tiniest bit fear underneath. "Having second thoughts?"

"No." Pepper tried reassuring him and scooted a little closer, but crossed one leg underneath her and sat sideways on the couch to face him. "But I think we need to talk." She said and chose her next words very carefully. "If we want this to work, we need to be on the same page. I want us to be completely honest. I can't keep any secrets from you. Not anymore. I want this too much, to ruin it."

Tony, with a bright mind like his got the drift immediately and to Peppers immense relief he didn't even flinch, let alone move away from his spot. He merely turned further towards her and cocked his arm up on the backseat, putting his head in his hand.  
"This is about Alex and Emily, isn't it?" There was nothing fearful or pitiful in his voice, but he was definitely serious now.

"Yes." Pepper said, still feeling a little anxious. "Let me just start by saying, I only want you. Wanted you for a very very long time and I am so, so sorry for everything I put you through." Pepper felt the small pang in her chest when she thought about the things she had done to him. How she had purposely hurt him. "I was afraid of being hurt, though now I know I never had reason to. It were only my own insecurities that were holding me back."

"I think we have a fair share in hurting the other one, don't you think Pep?" Tony stated and smiled at her again. One of his truthful, warm, Tony smiles she so rarely got to see and that managed to render her defenseless. Every. Single. Damn. Time.  
And all of the sudden Tony was closer to her than before and had taken her glass from her hands. One hand was still supporting his weight on the backrest. The other one had somehow managed to sneak into her hair and was pushing her chin up ever so gently.

"But it was my fault." Pepper managed to mumble before Tony shut her up in the most effective way ever. But he didn't only shut her mouth up, he also managed to shut her mind up. Tony was the one person capable of quitting her demons of self doubt and fear. He really rendered her helpless and defenseless.

After a while, it could have been minutes or hours even, she had no idea, she felt Tony brushing the skin of her stomach, wandering upwards as his lips started peppering her neck with light butterfly kisses. She remembered. He needed to know, before this went any further. It was the only way she could control the situation, the only way she could make sure he wouldn't run from her afterwards.

She got a grip and managed to grab his wandering hand and stop him. At the same time she managed to get a few inches of space between their lips, and she panted for a second to catch her breath.

Tony looked a little ruffled and absolutely smug, but also a bit confused why she stopped him. "I have to tell you one more thing. And I want you to know."

Tony braced himself, but didn't leave his spot hovering over her. "Alex asked me to marry him." The words tumbled out in a heap and she didn't dare to look up at him, afraid he would reject her now, feel betrayed and leave.

But she heard his voice, stern but still near, and she felt his presence like before. "Pepper, look at me." And she did. Eyes full of fear she might have ruined anything, but Tony looked more determined than ever. "Did you say yes?" He asked seriously.

"No." Was all she could get out, still afraid of his reaction and rebuttal. And yet she found none in his face.

"Then I don't care." His voice was raw and a deep rumble, like thunder. It was full of emotion, though this time it wasn't exactly love or adoration, rather it contained pure lust and primeval need. Without any further warning his lips were on hers again and his arms were pushing her into the pillows of the couch, basically laying her flat on her back.

Pepper welcomed him without any hesitation, thrilled that he wasn't mad at her or the fact that some one else proposed to her. Instead he was just interested in the fact that she chose to be free. To be _his_. And she was, she truly was his. The realization hit her hard and she pulled back a little to look him in the eyes.

"What?" He asked softly, his eyes burning into hers. "What is it?" A soft chuckle lay underneath his question and Pepper knew she must be grinning like a fool at him.

"Nothing." She breathed out, running her fingertips absentmindedly up and down his shoulders and upper arms. She sighed in contend and proceeded to cradle his neck combing her fingers through his short, but thick hair. And then she breathed out: "I'm happy."  
With definite strength she pulled him down to her again and started kissing him with renewed vigor. Though as soon as their lips were connected again Pepper started pushing Tony back up, following after him and brought them both into an upright position.

She wanted this. Had wanted it for years if she was honest, and now there was nothing stopping her anymore. There was nothing on this earth that could stop her anymore from getting what she truly wanted, from getting what she deserved, claiming what was rightfully hers and hers alone.

Pepper straddled him while continuing to kiss him, letting her tongue slide sensuously against his, alternating between sucking and biting at his lip. A low moan built in the back of Tony's throat that turned into a full groan when Pepper ground her pelvis against his. Now it was Tony's turn to pull back again, panting. He leaned his forehead against hers, his hands resting on her waist and holding her still, yet close. Pepper was eager to continue what they started and tried catching his lips again, but Tony held her firmly in place.

"Pep, wait." He was nearly panting. "I won't be able to stop if you continue…"

"I don't want to stop." She responded, breathing as heavily, trying to kiss him again but he stopped her again.

"Are you sure?" He asked searching her face for traces of doubt again.

"Are you?" She asked, an eyebrow raised.

Tony laughed and bucked his hip upwards into hers. She felt the hard bulge pressing into her and couldn't help the whimper that involuntarily escaped her. "Does this feel like I don't want you?"

"Then what are you waiting for, Iron Man?" She had managed to lean into him and bit his ear lobe before whispering hotly into his ear and earned another groan from him and a throb underneath her pelvis.

Suddenly she was lifted by his hands on her thighs and carried towards the bedroom. A giggle escaped her mouth and she closed her eyes leaning in to him again and she was met by his lips half way.

As they reached the bed Tony carefully sat down and placed her on top of him, straddling him again. Pepper led the way everywhere else in his life and it worked impeccably, so why shouldn't she lead the way in the bedroom? For the very first time in his life he was more than happy to let the woman set the pace, to let his companion lead the way. But she was so, so much more than that. She was Pepper, the woman who had run his life for over ten years, who was the epitome of professionalism and class, the woman who had the power to make him the happiest and luckiest man alive and the power to break him into a thousand pieces with just one look. She was his soulmate. She would never ever just be his companion.

And sure enough not soon after he felt her hands creep under his shirt and wife beater. She raked her burgundy painted nails over the skin between the waistline of his pants and his navel, once in a while lightly caressing the strip of hair, which dipped from his navel into his pants. His skin was softer than she had imagined, as his hands were always a bit rough and callous and a little scarred from working with hot metal and fire. But the skin on his abdomen was soft, like the petals of the first roses in spring.

After a while the area of his upper body she could reach without undressing him didn't suffice anymore. She retrieved her hands from underneath his shirt and they traveled up his arms and settled back on his neck for another split seconds, cradling his head while kissing him again with vigor. Tony had been holding her carefully the entire time, engrossed in their kiss and enjoying the goosebumps her trailing fingers had left on his skin. It was a new experience for him, taking things slow, savoring the other person. Even with Emily it had mostly been wild and dirty, but fast. And with his former one nights stands, well get in, get out, don't waste both of your time. But now it almost felt like, with Pepper, kissing her was enough. It filled him with a happiness he hadn't felt in forever.

Peppers hands were now trailing down his chest, popping open each button of his dress shirt they passed. As they finished their task of unbuttoning his shirt the wasted no time and slipped beneath the now opened piece of clothing, exploring his body through his wife beater and finally pushing it off his shoulders. Not soon after her manicured nails were raking down his sides as she slowly lifted the remaining piece of fabric from his torso. Their lips had to part for her to pull the wife beater over his head. Though this time they didn't return to his, like Tony would have wished. Instead she had leaned back a little, staring at the device in his chest. Her eyes were wide and nearly glazing overt the sight of his new reactor.

Her right hand came up and her fingre tips hovered over its flat surface, as if she wanted to touch it, but was afraid it would break when she did.

"You can touch it, Pep." He told her softly, still holding her waist and supporting her so she wouldn't tumble onto the floor.

"It's not a circle anymore." She commented, her voice nearly toneless. "It's a triangle." She observed the middle part of the arc, not with worry, but with interest.

She wasn't really talking to him, but he still wanted to comfort her. "It's the new element. It's best bound on a triangular surface. It's safe. I am safe."

"I almost lost you." She told him, and now she finally put her hand on his sternum, laying her palm flat on the surface, feeling the soft hum and watching the blue glow beneath her fingers.

He knew she blamed herself somehow, for almost losing him and he was determined to never ever see what he was currently seeing in her face: blame. Cradling her neck and face in his hands he forced her to look him in the eyes and the blue light between them made her look like she wasn't earthly. And she wasn't she was an angel or a goddess and she deserved so much more. He was selfish though. "You listen to me." He was staring into her eyes with a gaze so hot it could melt metal. "I am safe. I am going to live a happy and long life. With you. No-one could have seen the failure of the old one coming, and there was nothing you could have done. And I swear I will never keep anything for you again. We're in this together now. Do you understand me?"  
Her eyes were nearly spilling over, but she nodded. "Good, cause I really wanna stop with the serious talk now." He purred and flipped them over.

He earned a giggle from Pepper and felt her nails scraping down his back as he kissed her again, before her shirt followed his onto thee ground. "I couldn't agree more."

Her bra was nude with black lace covering the cups. Tony had started kissing down her neck and peppered each collarbone with feathery caresses. Contrary to his expectations there were no freckles on her skin below her chin. They only inhabited her face and hands, as well as her lower arms. Her skin was so white it almost glowed blue in the dimmed room and it was soft beyond compare.

Just as Tony's mouth was about to reach the swell of her breasts his breathing hitched in his throat. Her right hand had left his hair and had traveled further down to his pants. At first he wasn't sure whether it was deliberately or not when her fingers brushed the bulb in his pants. He was more than sure it wasn't an accident when he felt her fingers brush over him again, though.

Pepper felt his moan against her throat before she heard it and never in her life had she felt more power than in this moment. She could truly render him defenseless. With one touch, and not even skin to skin, she had turned him to a moaning, shuddering puddle. It was the hottest thing to know she had this power over him. Chasing this feeling even more she started to fumble with his button and fly and managed to get his pants open eventually.

As her hand made her way over his boxers Tony had started kissing down her chest again towards her mounds again. As he palmed her breast through the fabric of her bra she felt electricity curse through her body and warmth pool in the pits of her stomach and between her legs. Tony rubbed the spot where her nipple lay erected underneath the fabric and it was her time to moan and instinctively tighten her hold on his member for a split second which elicited a moan from him in return again.

Pepper was getting a little impatient now and started tugging on both his pants and boxers at the same time, but she couldn't get them off with how Tony was hovering above her. He sensed her distress however and chuckled against her chest.

"Easy tiger." He smoldered, his voice as thick as chocolate and then he kissed _that_ spot behind her ear that turned her to puddy.

"I think you're wearing too much clothes." She felt Tony stop his ministrations on her throat and came back front to look at her. Pepper pouted at him, her lower lip stuck out and her eyes were incredibly big and dark with lust.

He chuckled again and propped himself up onto his knees left and right from her thighs and slowly tucked them down. Pepper had her thumbs tucked into her skirt, ready to slide it off as well, but she was frozen in place, too fascinated with the sight before her to form a clear thought. Tony briefly left the bed to step out of his pants and Pepper followed as if she was on autopilot, now sitting upright as well and observing each and every muscle in his body as he moved back to her.

He was prominent, the rumors over the years about his endowment had been more than accurate apparently. And that was to be said in a state that wasn't even completely aroused yet.

When he reached her again, she half expected him to flop back down next to her, but he didn't. Instead he bend down to her and stroked her cheek. "Are you ok?" He asked without concern, but a true smile. Pepper was at a loss for words. She was more than ok, but also felt a little lost and nervous. "Come here." He said and took her hands, helping her to her feet.

She was about to tuck down her skirt again, but his hands stopped her. "May I?" He asked and his eyes were so deep and warm all she could do was nod. He held her gaze for a second longer, and she kissed him long and hard before smiling at him lewdly and he swears his heart stopped for a second, before he slid the skirt down her long, smooth legs.

Her panties were not exactly matching her bra, but they were black lace as well. On his way back up her mile long legs he stopped briefly and pressed a quick kiss to her inner thigh. Pepper in response buried her hands in his hair and a shaky moan escaped her lips. As he kissed her other thigh she tucked on his hair impatiently and he looked up at her, chin resting on her pelvis and was greeted with dark, hooded eyes. Her chest was heaving and he could feel her legs trembling.

"I want to feel you." She breathed out, voice heavy with lust and emotions.

"The woman always comes first." He stressed the last word, but stood up to guide her back to the bed. As soon as he stood, however Pepper was all over him, all but pushing him to the bed. Kissing him and clawing at his skin, her hands traveling to his backside first and then around to the front. Now free to touch and explore his body. She felt him response in her hand immediately, how he got even harder and how he throbbed against her grip. Her hands weighed and tested the structure of his balls, rolling them in her hands and massaging them slightly. Soon she felt his member pressed in full hight to her stomach and started stroking him slowly, but thoroughly. Tony groaned and threw his head back for a second, really enjoying Pepper's attention on him. With his last remaining strength and self-control he managed to turn them around and pushed Pepper onto the bed.

He linked his hands with hers and kissed down her neck again, reaching her breasts again. This time though he didn't hesitate and reached around to snap the bra open. Within no time he got the garment off and his hands left hers, while his lips found a new target.

Now it was Pepper's turn to groan and Tony grinned inwardly as her hand held his head to her and scraped his skull. As one hand of his was currently occupied with her right breast and his mouth was caressing her left one his free hand traveled over her smooth stomach and lower, dipping beneath her waistband and between her legs. He got the reaction he wanted immediately, her back arched upwards as well as her chest, bringing her even closer to him. Her moan echoed in his ears and he swore to himself he wanted to hear this sound everyday for the rest of his life.

Pepper was seeing stars by now. She had heard of his reputation, hell she had even witnessed how he got the reputation on a few involuntary occasions, but never had she dreamed of him being this skilled. She was feeling like she was about to tumble over the edge every minute, yet she felt like his ministrations could last for days and days and she'd still be begging for more.

Little did she know that Tony was on the edge of bursting himself. He always prided himself with his exceptional stamina, but he new, even one look from her now could lead to a very embarrassing mishap and he shifted his lower body away from her as she began rocking in rhythm with his fingers and brushing against him with her hip.

As she tried to grab him again, he pinned her hands to the mattress and grinned wickedly at her. "Like I said, Miss Potts, the woman always comes first." And by god she did. She wasn't screaming his name, how could she when all the air had been forced from her lungs, but the orgasm ripped through her body like a lightning.

As Tony felt her tighten around his fingers he was about to explode himself. The sheer witness of her coming, of her coming because of him was the sexiest and most arousing things he had ever witnessed. On her last spasms he slowly removed his fingers and she wasted no time in tucking her panties down. "Condoms?" He asked, being too high on endorphins to form full sentences.

"Pill." Was her breathless reply.

"You have no idea how much I want to kiss you right now." He told her as he hovered over her again.

"Why, uhm don't you do it?" She asked a wicked spark in her eyes.  
As Tony approached her, she used his momentum to flip them so she was on top, and just as he was about to protest she guided him home. They both shuddered and moaned at the same time. He felt incredible inside her. Stretching her, but not painfully, hitting the exact right places as he rocked slightly inside of her. Pepper moved carefully up and then down again, rolling her hips expertly, settling into a slow rhythm.

It was too much, the sight of her boobs bumping up and down, how her head was thrown back in ecstasy and the feeling of her body around him. He would last long enough to make her come again. "Pep, I-"

"I know." She stopped him, bending down to kiss him and gave a small moan as he started rubbing her clit again, but she removed his hand. "I want _you_ to enjoy it."

"But I-"

"Later." She scolded him and rolled her hips _that_ way again and he was gone. Over the edge, out of this world, to the dead and back. As Pepper rode him to his end she started to slow down and eventually lay her head on his chest and panted.

"I so sorr-" He started, but Pepper shushed him again.

"Don't- Don't you dare apologize." She was still panting herself but beamed at him, her hair tousled and sweaty.

Tony was rubbing circles on her thighs and could help the awkward laugh that escaped him. "No seriously, that was embarrassing."

She laughed and gathered the sheets around her as she stood up. "Why don't we talk about it in the shower?" She asked the wicked glint still in her eye. She disappeared behind the door and closed it. Not a second later the door reopened and her arm appeared, disposing the sheet on the floor and leaving the door a crack open.

With an amused laugh Tony got up. "This woman will be the death of me."

* * *

The sun just started rising above the Chrysler Building when a woman with dark hair emerged Stark Industries privat jet at JFK.

* * *

**As always ignore the mistakes and I'd love to read your thoughts. (:**

**Here's your preview for the final chapter: **

"Shit!" Came her interruption and she smacked the hand, which had been stroking his hair, against her forehead.

He looked at her speechless and she held his gaze, equally stunned. Then Tony started laughing. She blinked at him in confusion but soon joined in at the absurdity of the situation.

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